Swing, swing, chase petty thug, swing, swing, chase mega-villian, swing, swing, chase petty thug.
It's been sitting in my drawer for months, along with other pearlers such as Jedi Starfighter. Who knows, maybe I'm hoping there'll be some kind of wine cellar reaction and they'll get better with age.
I dig Spider-Man. Not serious Spider-Man, but goofball Spidey.
And I also dig comics. So when a game mixes goofball, Spider-Man and comics, man, I'm in.
But for crying out loud. This game is as dull as swinging on a tire swing. And that's basically what you do.
Swing. Help someone. Swing. Help someone else. Swing. Race someone. Swing. Help someone. Swing...
Now there are some good boss fights and some great voice acting, but it really doesn't do anything to distract you from how mind-numblingly boring this game is.
The two saving features are the comic style treatment of the graphics and the ability to play as Venom.
This really should have been called Ultimate Spider-Man Racer. After all, virtually every task involves racing from point A to point B. When you help someone, you have to race to their location before the thugs beat them to a pulp. Alternatively you have to save them then race them to the hospital. Boss fights are all preluded by a race, where you have to keep up with them. Mind you, the margins are so narrow that one wrong turn means failure. On top of all that, there are some actual races, where, funnily enough, you have to race other heros.
Starting to sound repeatative? Well it is.
There are some stand-out moments, but they just wind up lost within a sea of mediocre gameplay and mission designs.
Ideally, your game experience should go something like this...
Swing. Go to the video shop. Swing. Rent it. Swing. Take it home and play it for a couple of hours. Swing. Return it the next day. Swing. Play Jedi Starfighter. Swing. Realise you should have hired that one too.