What are the benefits for a man to get married?

What exactly do people "get" from marriage?

Been married for 11 years, here's how I think I've benefited:

-We love each other, and spending our life building a future for each other is very rewarding.

-My wife compliments me. The things I am lacking in she is strong in (and vice-verse), so we make a good team.

-She has given me two beautiful daughters. Marriage certainly isn't a requirement for this, but I believe the traditional setup offers the most stable and beneficial environment for them.

-While I was never a romeo I'm not ugly and did not have problems getting sex, with that said the amount of sex I get as a married man completely and utterly blows away what I used to have.

-Beyond quantity, the quality is better too. When you are with someone so long there's a lot of...um...experimentation since you trust each other so much. I realize not every marriage is like this though, I know lots of couples who's sex life has fizzled.

-While the risk of financial disaster in a divorce is a possibility, I think the success I have found is greater than if I stayed single. Basically having people who depend on me pushed me to gain greater wealth and stability and forced me to be more responsible.

Any questions, just ask.

alojsa asanavic

Since most marriages come out of the guy asking the girl, this IS a good question if one believes a guy doesn't get anything out of being married.

I have a friend who is dating a girl in an open relationship (she's married). I asked why she would get married if she and her husband wouldn't just be with each other. I still don't really understand it fully, but I think it came down to tax benefits. So both the gal AND the guy are getting something out of it.

As far as a woman getting anything out of the marriage, if you're thinking of just what she gets when you divorce, there's always the pre-nup to keep that shite from happening. And I also thought people didn't get anything extra when they cheated, like, all rights are gone. I also thought alimony was quickly on the way out. I ALSO thought both parents are now able to make a case for who gets the kids most of the time. My brother-in-law won custody to his kids because he was the one with a paying job, and HE was the faithful one. He also kept the house (which, dude, that sucks you lost your house. It was very cute.)

I guess it's different from state to state?

A lot of people. I know I want to.

Yeah I know, people have different preferences, shocking right?

Literally none of those things require marriage

Well when I was young and going to church with my parents the sunday school people said an advantage is you get to go to heaven if you marry as opposed to living with your girlfriend without the benefit of marriage. Because the latter would be a no no. Ok that was true they said that which is probably the case with a number of older posters here and some younger ones too. But guys I don't really believe in those teachings anymore. Just making light of it, hope I don't 'go to hell for doing so.

sets the foundation for a strong solid family

I didn't say they did, however the question was what benefit was there for a man to get married and these are things that have directly benefited me as a direct result of getting married to a woman.

I think most men get married because their dating life sucks and its easier to have a permanent companion than it is to find/meet a new one.

But you could still do all those things without getting married

You could probably do a subset of those things without getting married, but you would be hard pressed to find a person willing to do everything without the kind of commitment that marriage brings. Even so, that doesn't negate the fact that these can be the benefits of getting married. Just because there are multiple ways of achieving the same thing doesn't diminish the benefit if you choose a specific way of doing it.

Basically, live your life however you see fit but the idea that marriage has no benefit for men is juvenile and ignorant.

Men can benefit greatly from a good marriage, the same as women. And guess what? In the above scenario even if I didn't get married but still had kids, combined finances, etc if we broke up (same as divorce) there would be serious consequences even without the marriage certificate. Assets would still be split, child care to be doled out, and many consequences for the children as well.

@Renevent42: didn't need to get married to get any of that. is it really that hard to trust someone if you are not married to them?

You are trying to justify marriage when reality there is none for it

There's nothing to justify...those are in fact things I have benefited from being married. Just because someone may find other avenues to achieving the same thing doesn't mean I didn't benefit. Also, the trust I have for my wife is the REASON I got married, not the other way around.

Point in case:

Simply being in a relationship having sex with your partner may be a benefit. Just because someone else goes around having one night stands (no relationship) doesn't mean the person in the relationship isn't benefiting from the sex that person and their partner shares.

Bottom line is benefits/values/etc is based on personal values and what each individual wants. If you aren't interested in marriage that's fine by me...but I benefit from my marriage none-the-less.

really, just like that lol.

i'm not a big fan of the singles game but marriage is a whole another step up from a relationship. from experience, there are negatives to messing around with a bunch of different women.

The biggest benefit of marriage is kids. As a species we need to reproduce and the best environment to raise kids in is a married household. Also if you marry a woman with a career you and her can put both salaries to work. You get tax right off and benefits. You get medical insurance benefits. You get extra help with student loans from the loan holder (Sallie Mae). Your credit score usually goes up (unless you have great credit and the other person has bad credit). Easier to get a loan. People take you more seriously as a man in the business world when you are married. If both people are faithful you can have worry/guilt free sex. And it sucks to be lonely forever.

However, men bare a higher risk if the marriage goes bad. And women are 4 times more likely to end a marriage in divorce.

This is why waifus are superior.

STD alert !!!

Marriage isnt about have sex with a single person.

Its about bond, its much more then sex. There will be a time when you will need someone by your side, always.

and that will be your wife.

If you want a family and are actually lucky enough to end up with someone who isn't a ball busting bitch then the benefits are having a family of your own and life long companionship.

Let's see.....

I gained a best friend, chef, sex slave, accountant, nanny, nurse, laundry woman, janitor, economist, etc. Of course, to pay for all those meant she got every cent I have. We've been married since 1994. If she was going to leave me, she would've left me already. Her family already has a thriving logging business overseas and she has her own job. It's not like she needed my money or anything.

I know for sure I'll have a hot-cooked meal waiting for me (unless I get home first), the kids would be taken care of, the house would be clean, my clothes would be washed and ironed, and all my bills paid. How my wife manages all those while still holding a job is beyond me. But, I let her know I consider myself lucky and go through great pains to make sure I don't ruin a good thing.

Just to be clear, because it looks like I was the one who said "who the **** wants to spend the rest of their life with ONE woman LOL", that was the poster after me who I guess attempted a reply to me but didn't work.

Anyway, Lightleggy pretty much took the words right out of my mouth.

Benefits of getting married:

To have and to hold your one and only true love for life.

You'll never be alone, always will have that companion to do the things you love and don't love.

To have someone you can trust with all your evil, and good things about you that you keep against the world.

To be able to hold the responsibility of being parents with, nothing more important to a child then mom and dad.

To wake up to someone everyday of the rest of your life

To be able to have sex whenever you want

To be able to share responsibility and $$ income with as one

To have another family added to you as yours, another mom and dad, and brothers and sisters, cousins and all .. Lots of bonuses ..

None of those require marriage though. You could have gotten all those benefits by simply staying together longer

You dont need to be married to have kids, you can still live together and raise kids without the title of marriage.

Minor tax benefits become insignificant when you factor in the major risk of divorce, alimony, and child support.

And you can still be together without getting married

That was already addressed in previous posts and in the very post you quoted.

Nothing.......

You keep saying these random little things that dont require marriage. I am asking specifically, what benefits do men derive from marriage? What does a marriage give a man that he can not otherwise obtain? I have seen virtually nothing to answer this yet

No benefits. Marriage is a contract rigged against you. If you're woman, by all means. They have the most leverage in marriage.

Random? I'm saying things that have directly and greatly benefited me by being married. Those are facts in my life.

Regarding them not requiring marriage, I've already refuted that idiotic claim. Just because there are multiple avenues for gaining the same benefits doesn't mean those aren't benefits. As I said, just because someone who has one night stands benefits from sex without the requirement from a relationship doesn't mean a person who is in a long term relationship doesn't benefit from sex. Same goes with marriage...just because some people do similar setups with their non-marriage relationships doesn't mean the men who do get married don't benefit from the same things.

The only possible claim you could make is for people in similar setups (live together, combine finances, children, etc) that being legally married increases your legal and financial risk. Even that claim is pretty much wrong because guess what...if you live with someone, combine your finances, and have children with them married or not if you break up you are going to be financially liable and have the same legal consequences regardless (especially if you have a prenuptial).

If you don't value marriage that's fine, the FACT is many men benefit from it.

I agree, men pay a high risk financially if the marriage goes bad. That is the last thing I mentioned. Women can actually financially from divorce if the husband makes significantly more than she does.

But a household with two working professionals will always make out better than a household with only one. Having kids outside marriage will still lead to the man having to pay child support which can often cost more than taking care of them yourself. More importantly, the vast majority of women are incapable of raising children on their own. Single parent kids fall behind their 2 parent counterparts in almost every category, academics, prison rates, teen pregnancy, future income, etc.

In addition very few mothers are capable of financially taking care of a household on their own. So to supplement the cost of raising kids the require the state to provide assistance in the form of both forced child support and tax payer funding to make up the rest. This is why the primary recipient of government aid (welfare) is single mothers.

The role that men used to play in providing for the family is now being put on the government. This is the major reason so many governments in the western world are in debt. Our government is raising half our country's kids.

It is irresponsible, stupid and destructive for men and women to just be having kids if they arent married. To make matters worse its usually the poorest neighborhoods that have the most single households.

Marriage is risky for men nowadays. The the laws in family courts are f****d up. If you don't want to take on that risk then don't get married. But don't have kids either.

Just keep in mind that a strong healthy nation is dependent on stable population growth.

@Aljosa23: Based on your responses and post count, it seems you are too. You come off as very insecure.

Family.

Eventually people start settling down and look for it.

Women instinctively are self destructive. They often wonder why things are falling apart and why there is so much drama when it's their own fault. They will create a problem and will perceive it as a purpose not realizing that they are creating all the problems that they had to solve instead of enjoying life. But a percentage of men do this as well. Something is extremely wrong with the human species. When we have it good appreciate it because if not it can and will get worse. Don't look at a relationship sexually as look at a relationship as being partners and wanting to help each other as a team. Ofcourse my ex was just using me as a stepping stone. And don't have sex that much otherwise it will get boring. There is way more to life than sex.

Being with the one you love.

Being with the one you love. That's the only benefit I need and want. Everything else is secondary and doesn't matter.

One is better than none.

I'm all for spending life with one women but without legal marital status