How do I know who I'm going to marry if I'm not allowed to date?

I'm Muslim, so its against my religion to date. But the thing is, how am I gonna know who I'm in love with and who I'm supposed to marry if I never do anything like that?

Please help, I need some serious advice.

I'm Muslim, so its against my religion to date. But the thing is, how am I gonna know who I'm in love with and who I'm supposed to marry if I never do anything like that?

Please help, I need some serious advice.

Tigerman950

WHAT? its against your religion to date???

I have the same problem, but i don't really believe in it...so when i move out, I'm dating :P

i guess god (parents)tell you...lol good luck sucks to be muslim

I have the same problem, but i don't really believe in it...so when i move out, I'm dating :P

werthog14

If you don't mind me asking, are you Muslim as well?

stop playing video games and go out.chAzN93

Yeah i am...Very religious parents, and i don't believe in it at all :(werthog14

Arranged marriages I guess.
Try to ignore that rule, but if you must then ask your Imam for advice.

[QUOTE="werthog14"]Yeah i am...Very religious parents, and i don't believe in it at all :(_en1gma_

I'll just play the guise of a good child, until i can move out...then im FREE!

[QUOTE="_en1gma_"][QUOTE="werthog14"]Yeah i am...Very religious parents, and i don't believe in it at all :(werthog14

I'll just play the guise of a good child, until i can move out...then im FREE!

Yeah, that's probably what I'll do. I'll still pray five times a day and stuff, but once I move out I probably won't be as strict with myself.

I'm Muslim, so its against my religion to date. But the thing is, how am I gonna know who I'm in love with and who I'm supposed to marry if I never do anything like that?

Please help, I need some serious advice.

Tigerman950

I think the whole idea is that you're supposed to DECIDE who you love, rather than to DISCOVER who you love.

I still don't understand why people adhere to religious traditions that we're used hundreds, if not thousands of years ago.

Would it be totally out of question to talk to your parents?

Err i don tknow what youre talking about... muslims ARE allowed to date. it happens all the time... just date other muslim girls and dont have sex till youre married. parents should be fine with that. isn't that how it works?

You'll just have to know who the right woman is then I guess. :?

I never knew dating was against Muslim custom. I always thought that was a religion that allowed you to pick your mate.

If you want to date, then date. Nuts to what your religion says. You should be doing what you feel is right for yourself and your future. I've never understood the ideal of marrying someone you don't love with your entire being. If you can't marry for love... then don't marry.

I hope your parents don't have an arranged marriage set up for you yet. :P

I don't know what part of the world you are from, but if at all possible move out of the house and out of your parents control. That will give you the necessary experience to deal with life by yourself and you will have the freedom to experience life and what it has to offer.

you can date in islam i believe you just can bang...

Marriage isn't about love, its about procreation. I thinkthat's religion's perspective on it :P

I just learned about this today and hearing you speak up about it on here really makes me wonder how the Muslim community can possibly move forward with such backward thinking.

I don't usually speak up about something like religion because I feel that its within everyone's power to be or do whatever they want. Unfortunately, for Muslim communities in particular, this becomes incredibly difficult. Societies often shun people who don't follow the guidelines, and its against the law where you live.

If you want my personal opinion, get out of there. When you're old enough and have something to offer the world like a degree, go off to a country where you can be yourself and not have people come down on you for it.

If I lived in a country like that I know I'd wanna get out. :(

I didn't start dating until after high school...but that was because I was a closeted homosexual :D

Wait until you move out. Plain and simple. You could "rebel" against your parents, but if you care about them or at least respect them (which you should, if they're good parents) that's probably not the greatest thing to do.

Lol, I'll be a total gentleman :D

This is a tough situation, and I doubt that you're going to get a good answer on a gaming forum, especially from people who aren't Muslim in the first place. I'd recommend going to your Imam and discussing it.

Why dont you lose your way and become an athiest for a while, then after you find your one love , find religion again.

If not then maybe you'll get lucky, theres only 3.1 billion women out there.

I'm Muslim, so its against my religion to date. But the thing is, how am I gonna know who I'm in love with and who I'm supposed to marry if I never do anything like that?

Please help, I need some serious advice.

[QUOTE="Tigerman950"]

I'm Muslim, so its against my religion to date. But the thing is, how am I gonna know who I'm in love with and who I'm supposed to marry if I never do anything like that?

Please help, I need some serious advice.

CreasianDevaili

No, you are wrong. There is no such thing as a forced marriage in Islam. Both the male and the female involved must offer consent without any outside pressures for the marriage to be valid.

If you want to date then wait until you move out (so your parents can't stop you) and go for it :)tofu-lion91

I'll say it again, speak to your Imam. The majority of the people here are trying to make you break the rules of your religion. It sounds to me like you believe in it, so don't listen to them.

Dating in the Western sense is prohibited (i.e. a 1-1 meeting with a person of the opposite sex). If there is someone you are interested in and you want to get to know them, you must be accompanied by a family member to make sure nothing happens. What usually happens is that your family looks for prospective partners for you based on your personality, so someone who is a good match for you.

The idea in Islam is that love grows over time. I know it may sound hard, but look at the facts: In the USA, where dating is so popular, why is there a 50% divorce rate. At the same time, Islam is the 2nd largest religion in the world and the fastest growing one as well. Therefore, Islam is doing something right that the West isn't.

This pretty much sums the process: http://islam.about.com/od/marriage/a/courtship.htm

I know it's hard, especially if you are living in a non-Muslim country, but go to your mosque and talk to someone about it. You're not the only one with this problem.

[QUOTE="CreasianDevaili"][QUOTE="Tigerman950"]

I'm Muslim, so its against my religion to date. But the thing is, how am I gonna know who I'm in love with and who I'm supposed to marry if I never do anything like that?

Please help, I need some serious advice.

No, you are wrong. There is no such thing as a forced marriage in Islam. Both the male and the female involved must offer consent without any outside pressures for the marriage to be valid.

Wrong about what? I never said anything about forced marriage. In islam, your not allowed to "test the waters" so to speak correct? To keep both sides pure? Thus, by the religion, you dont need to. Because someone out there is for you, pure, waiting, and you for them. Dating is not needed right?CreasianDevaili

You are wrong in that the person you are supposed to marry is set in stone before you are born. Dating in the way we use it is absolutely prohibited, but getting to know the person as long as you have a family member accompanying you is allowed. Look at my previous post.

I'm Muslim, so its against my religion to date. But the thing is, how am I gonna know who I'm in love with and who I'm supposed to marry if I never do anything like that?

Please help, I need some serious advice.

Tigerman950

Sounds like you are in abit of a jam! There is no right answer to this, I think the question you should be asking yourself is are you Muslim? Your parents obviously are but do you belive that you shouldn't date? IF you are going to be pushed willing or not into a prearranged marriage then what is the hurt in having a look. The definition of date can mean alot of things, if there is someone you like ask them out .. You know what you live once, and to live in regret and wondering what if is no way to live.

ehhh why is everyone assuming the TC has an arranged marriage coming up???