Do you secretly hate anyone you get along with?

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bfa1509

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#1 bfa1509
Member since 2011 • 1058 Posts

Its a stupid question as 'yes' is the answer for everybody, but to what extent?

This guy I sit beside at work, I get on with like a house on fire and anyone looking at us would think we were best friends for life (BFsFL). Truth is, I absolutely despise the guy and nothing disgusts me more than being in his presence. It happens quite frequently with me where I get on reasonably well with my friends but in truth they annoy me most of the time. But the guy at work truly is a special case.

The worst thing is that he always wants to go for drinks and stuff and I find it so energy draining trying to avoid these occasions...

I'm currently trying to find a way of moving desk, but it's not that easy as it's a small office.

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hrt_rulz01

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#2 hrt_rulz01
Member since 2006 • 22374 Posts

My sister's ex-boyfriend comes to mind... for some reason we got on really well, but he was/is a complete asshole that I kinda hated deep down.

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Sam3231

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#3  Edited By Sam3231
Member since 2008 • 2949 Posts

I don't know but it seems to be a common thing in my life. I just cut them off as soon as possible. People can be incredibly stupid when it comes to gauging the other person's interest.

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ShepardCommandr

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#4 ShepardCommandr
Member since 2013 • 4939 Posts

I don't get along with anyone.

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fenriz275

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#5 fenriz275
Member since 2003 • 2383 Posts

Hate? No. I'm not that interested in most people to develop anything close to hatred.

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jun_aka_pekto

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#6  Edited By jun_aka_pekto
Member since 2010 • 25255 Posts

Nope. Not even those I get into arguments with. I don't hate anyone in the real world. I don't hate anyone online.

If there's the appearance of conflict brewing, I just let things go and cool off.

Heck. Not long ago, someone did a U-turn with my car approaching. Meh. I just shrugged it off after cussing a bit. ;)

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uninspiredcup

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#7 uninspiredcup
Member since 2013 • 58950 Posts

Na, Scottish people are generally quite blunt.

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theone86

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#8 theone86
Member since 2003 • 22669 Posts

@bfa1509 said:

Its a stupid question as 'yes' is the answer for everybody, but to what extent?

This guy I sit beside at work, I get on with like a house on fire and anyone looking at us would think we were best friends for life (BFsFL). Truth is, I absolutely despise the guy and nothing disgusts me more than being in his presence. It happens quite frequently with me where I get on reasonably well with my friends but in truth they annoy me most of the time. But the guy at work truly is a special case.

The worst thing is that he always wants to go for drinks and stuff and I find it so energy draining trying to avoid these occasions...

I'm currently trying to find a way of moving desk, but it's not that easy as it's a small office.

This actually happens to me quite a lot. When I was at university a bunch of the people in our group graduated and the ones who were left were pretty much a bunch of a-holes I never talked to before. I'm positive they picked up on the fact that I didn't like them, but a lot of the time they didn't seem to take the hint. I think they thought they were doing me a favor by keeping me company, but I would've preferred being alone.

That being said, I never really got along with them the way you describe getting along with this guy. I think you're either going to have to examine what it is that annoys you about him and find some way to deal with it, or just be straight up with him that you're not interested in going for drinks. That or find a way to stop being annoyed about being asked to go for drinks, it doesn't hurt to say no (I'm assuming it's a platonic invitation, BTW).

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indzman

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#9 indzman
Member since 2006 • 27736 Posts

I love and hate @thegerg

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CastoReviewsGameing

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#10  Edited By CastoReviewsGameing
Member since 2017 • 6 Posts

Just a few guys at work, I try to avoid people I don't like but I can't avoid them at work >_>

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deactivated-5b797108c254e

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#11 deactivated-5b797108c254e
Member since 2013 • 11245 Posts

There are people I dislike but I don't get along with any of them. I am polite to them and will work with them (if that's the case) but I won't be drinking coffee with them any time soon.

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mrbojangles25

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#12 mrbojangles25
Member since 2005 • 58305 Posts

I like to take the high road in situations like that; if someone is a prick, you have to be better than them because getting into arguments is sinking to their level, and letting them get to you is letting them win.

But ultimately, in my head, I am thinking "life would be so easier if I could settle all my conflicts with force". I know that's wrong and I don't think I would [very often] even if I could, but...yeah :(

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Dr_Vancouver

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#14 Dr_Vancouver
Member since 2017 • 1046 Posts

I secretly hate EVERYONE I get along with. I hate most humans. Humans are despicable.

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RockField

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#15 RockField
Member since 2017 • 500 Posts

I am on that kind of situation right now.

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PimpHand_Gamer

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#16 PimpHand_Gamer
Member since 2014 • 3048 Posts

My step nephews. They are full grown adults that live at home with their mommies, no jobs either. They just sit and play games all night, sleep all day. Losers are not only a pathetic waste of life but also a waste of what America offers.

One of the bosses where I work, he's selfish, hateful, rude, a snitch and plays nice when it's something he wants from you. More than that though, it's his hypocrisy that I despise as he judges everyone for the same things he does twice as worse. It's funny when he says how he hates thieves so much but yet he steals copper and has someone else turn it in, expecting to reap 90% of the profits. But I have to get along with him.

Basically if it's someone I have to get along with but don't like them, then I hate them where as if I don't have to get along then I don't give a crap about them.

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bfa1509

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#17 bfa1509
Member since 2011 • 1058 Posts

@Sam3231 said:

I don't know but it seems to be a common thing in my life. I just cut them off as soon as possible. People can be incredibly stupid when it comes to gauging the other person's interest.

To cut him off is good advice but I still have to sit beside him for 8 hours a day.

@theone86 said:

This actually happens to me quite a lot. When I was at university a bunch of the people in our group graduated and the ones who were left were pretty much a bunch of a-holes I never talked to before. I'm positive they picked up on the fact that I didn't like them, but a lot of the time they didn't seem to take the hint. I think they thought they were doing me a favor by keeping me company, but I would've preferred being alone.

That being said, I never really got along with them the way you describe getting along with this guy. I think you're either going to have to examine what it is that annoys you about him and find some way to deal with it, or just be straight up with him that you're not interested in going for drinks. That or find a way to stop being annoyed about being asked to go for drinks, it doesn't hurt to say no (I'm assuming it's a platonic invitation, BTW).

The guy is kind of a loner. He eats his lunch at his desk and he uses the bathrooms on a different floor in case he bumps into one of his colleagues. A big problem is that I can't really talk to anyone else about him at work as they think I'm a d!ck for bitching about the guy. They feel sorry for him, being weird and a loner and all.

But he's disgusting! He's constantly 'picking and eating' if you know what I mean. He also sticks his hand down his pants to scratch himself. He snorts constantly. When I talk to him he is very loud and vulgar. I'm only scratching the surface here, but I think you get the gist.

I hate him.

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raugutcon

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#19 raugutcon
Member since 2014 • 5576 Posts

I’m polite but I’m quite blunt, if I don’t like somebody I tell them.

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tocool340

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#20 tocool340
Member since 2004 • 21652 Posts

No, only because hate is such a strong word. I have a strong dislike for certain individuals that I "get along with". I'm normally able to get a long with just about anyone, even those who have superiority/god complexes. My strong dislike is associated with those types of people. I just simply bend ever so slightly to their wills without appearing to be one of their doormats. I allow them to get what they want because arguing with folks like that seem like a huge waste of energy and time, which I have better things to do than give either of them away to people like that. Only so much they can get away with before they get a prompt "f--- you" from me though...

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deactivated-5e081d8b4abb0

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#21 deactivated-5e081d8b4abb0
Member since 2017 • 1499 Posts

I don't really hate anyone per say but people do tend to annoy me. In the past, places I've worked at I'm usually cool with everyone because I have a happy friendly demeanor and I love to crack jokes on people. I do it as a joke and never mean anything by it and my jokes vary from person to person as I can't say one joke to one person as I do to another...lol. Although, I do run into people who come off as arrogant, obnoxious, or just downright annoying. I can't stand people like this. People who talk too much and any bit of information they hear about you, they'll tell everyone else as if it's their business.

With this, I just keep my distance. I'll say hi and bye but that's as far as it goes. As I get older I continue to keep to myself more and more. I pop up out in the wild among my friends one or two months out of the year and then back to my cave I go...I keep myself a mystery and continue to work behind the scenes.

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theone86

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#22 theone86
Member since 2003 • 22669 Posts

@bfa1509 said:
@Sam3231 said:

I don't know but it seems to be a common thing in my life. I just cut them off as soon as possible. People can be incredibly stupid when it comes to gauging the other person's interest.

To cut him off is good advice but I still have to sit beside him for 8 hours a day.

@theone86 said:

This actually happens to me quite a lot. When I was at university a bunch of the people in our group graduated and the ones who were left were pretty much a bunch of a-holes I never talked to before. I'm positive they picked up on the fact that I didn't like them, but a lot of the time they didn't seem to take the hint. I think they thought they were doing me a favor by keeping me company, but I would've preferred being alone.

That being said, I never really got along with them the way you describe getting along with this guy. I think you're either going to have to examine what it is that annoys you about him and find some way to deal with it, or just be straight up with him that you're not interested in going for drinks. That or find a way to stop being annoyed about being asked to go for drinks, it doesn't hurt to say no (I'm assuming it's a platonic invitation, BTW).

The guy is kind of a loner. He eats his lunch at his desk and he uses the bathrooms on a different floor in case he bumps into one of his colleagues. A big problem is that I can't really talk to anyone else about him at work as they think I'm a d!ck for bitching about the guy. They feel sorry for him, being weird and a loner and all.

But he's disgusting! He's constantly 'picking and eating' if you know what I mean. He also sticks his hand down his pants to scratch himself. He snorts constantly. When I talk to him he is very loud and vulgar. I'm only scratching the surface here, but I think you get the gist.

I hate him.

LOL,

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I'm starting to get the sense that his overtures are less than fully platonic. If that's the case, just be direct with him that you don't want to get drinks, and want him to stop asking. If it's not the case and he's really just someone you sit next to, I don't see the big deal. Either way, I think you need to stop fixating on the small stuff, none of that should stop you from being able to enjoy his company at work, much less cause you to hate him. If him asking you for drinks is what's bothering you then you don't need to just get over that, but you need to address it.

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#23 Gaming-Planet
Member since 2008 • 21064 Posts

People I hang out with annoy the shit out of me at some point.

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DarkTower

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#24 DarkTower
Member since 2017 • 201 Posts

most people annoy me for one reason or another, but i tend to get along with most people

i consider myself a great actor, and people tend to think i'm their "buddy buddy" even though i really don't like them that much

yeah i'm def. an introvert, i'd rather be alone than have to deal with or pander to anyone else's desires or plans

i don't think i really "hate" anyone, but i tend to have a short "emotional fuse" in that people piss me off pretty easily, but because i'm so good at hiding it, they never really know.

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foxhound_fox

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#25 foxhound_fox
Member since 2005 • 98532 Posts

Hate? No.

Seriously think is purposefully lying to drivers about loads and setting them up to fail? There is this one dispatcher I work with who I'm really starting to heavily dislike and hope the logistics department sends him out on his ass. He's costing us good drivers by making them hate the work he gets them to do.

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MirkoS77

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#26 MirkoS77
Member since 2011 • 17657 Posts

What an odd question.

No, I wear my feelings on my sleeve. If I don’t like someone the best I can do is tolerate them, but I’ll let my feelings be known. I only get along with people I like.

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deactivated-63d1ad7651984

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#27 deactivated-63d1ad7651984
Member since 2017 • 10057 Posts

Myself but I think he knows.

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#28 joem789
Member since 2017 • 3 Posts

I hate sushi. But I can be in the same room with it. I hope it isn't made from human.

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#29 nickeddreams
Member since 2017 • 14 Posts

@bfa1509: Hate's a strong word, but I actually, I started working with one of my good friends recently. He's really nice as a mate, and we hang out a lot. Once I started working with him however, I realized a whole different side to him - where there was no initiative, he was lazy, procrastinated a lot, and just had a crappy attitude in general. This kinda changed my view towards him, but I try not to let work affect my personal life - we stopped engaging in small talk whenever we're in the office now, I avoid him whenever I can, and just get my stuff done. I still try to hang out with him outside of a work setting but once it comes to being in the office, we're no longer friends as far as I'm concerned and he's a colleague I've come to despise.

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#30  Edited By AmberLarson
Member since 2017 • 5 Posts

My colleague. I can't stand the senseless talking about nothing. And these talkings can last forever...I really love to work more than speak with him. And when I start some smater topics about new technologies, books, some philosopic topics, he reacts like an idiot.