How do you convince your parents video games aren't bad?

I am i serious gamer kid that's 13 and loves to play video games and takes it very seriously and got ps4 on launch with my own money (yes i do sit on them and play them ALL DAY!) And im going to college to be a creative director. But my mom hates it and calls me lazy and i need to do something with my life (i do football and wrestling and im pretty decent at both). And my grades are all A's and im called Sheldon at school (apparently because im crazy smart and look kinda like him.) I mean video games aren't rotting my brain i take no effect from that and im not fat i weigh 110 pounds (boniest kid at my school). But about every month there will be a point where my mom just goes off on me for how much i play. she will yell at me and we'll argue and ill say its 2013 and things have changed and she'll say when i was a kid i was always outside and this and that. And when she asks me to do something i almost always do it and i consider myself a nice person. So my question is next time me and my mom argue about video games (and if it goes by schedule it will be in the upcoming week) how can i convince her video games arent bad. and i need a really really really really really good statement about how they're not bad because my mom is really really really really hard to convince.

You can't be 13 years old and take gaming seriously. You can't even get a job at your age to support your own hobby.

Tell your parents that you will do well in school and remain healthy until you are 18 and then they should be able to respect your decision to game however much you please.

she also says i waste too much money on gaming and says "you should be saving up for a car for when your 16" WTF

Just wait till you turn 18 and want to move out. The responsibilities associated with renting/owning a home will make you wish you were at home with mommy and daddy again.

I too had parents that thought video games "rotted my brain". However, nothing could further from the truth. Video games improve cognitive function. For instance, think of the strategy you learn playing, Starcraft, Civ, or Total War. Think of the team building skills you learn organizing a team in DotA, LoL, CoD, ect. The finance and management skills you can learn from simulation games like the Tycoon series, Aerobiz, Havest Moon, ect. Problem solving, decision making, and emotional intelligence learned from games like Heavy Rain, Mass Effect, Resident Evil, ect. Learn to play an instrument like in Rocksmith. Even a Pokemon game is said to have the reading level of coursework for a senior in high school. Playing Madden can increase your understanding of football x's and o's since you play it in RL.

Almost any skill you can get in a game can translate to real life, if you're smart enough to connect the dots (you seem to be).

In the near future, training for jobs and in schools will be done with video games because they are (arguably) the fastest way to learn skills. They allow you to learn by making mistakes you couldn't make in the real world. It is my belief that gamers have a distinct advantage over their peers in the workplace/school due to the skills improved by playing video games. You know what really rots your brain? Doing what a lot of kids your age do - drink, smoke, do drugs, commit crimes, sitting around, ect.

The problem is, some people (like your mom) attach blanket labels to things they don't understand. Your mom cannot say that all games rot your brain because she has not played them all. Maybe if you tell her some things you learned from the games you played and how it applies to you, you could convince her video games are good.

Good luck and don't give up, she'll come around.

I think any serious gamer out there has had a similar conversation with their parents at some point. I've gotta agree with csward. Just show them you can maintain and balance all your other responsibilities and enjoy gaming at the same time. If you're parents are anything like mine used to be you could make the most fact based and rational arguments in the world and still not be able to convince them.

Just don't forget to live life as well, gaming's great in a lot of ways but it's no substitute for real experiences.

Their house their rules. Besides, as your parents they naturally believe they know better than you.

Ok so I think she makes a valid point about the car, but honestly I can see the upcoming argument in a few years "Mom will you help me buy a car?" "No you should have saved up money when I told you to."

If your parents do not like you gaming they don't like you gaming. As long as they don't stop you it shouldn't be a problem, why bother arguing. My best counter argument was the best word in the world for pointless arguments "Okay." Just keep saying okay and stop bringing up counter arguments. Argument finishes faster and you get more time to play games and your mom thinks she made some sort of progress. Win win.

Make a videogame, and sell it for enough money to buy a car.

I think others have already tapped the essence of what needs to be done...show your family that you're not disconnected from real-life goals & people. Show them that you have real-world responsibilities and can still be counted on to do what is asked from you. (disclaimer: it does sound like you're already doing that...just keep that up).

If you're looking to become a creative director, good luck...odds are you're mom my not know what that job is...or she may understand that it's terribly competitive and unstable. Show her some of your own creations on paper and maybe express other avenues within that career path that she can relate to. It's not as easy as going to school and getting an interview...it's about connections and ideas...show her that you can be a people-person, and that you have a creative-drive; and it will be easier to buy that you are simply doing "research" when you game.

thats not true, you can still get a job to buy games. you know what else other kids do to get money. like raking the leaves or mowing the yard. so yes, he can support his hobby without working 7 hours a day

Eh?

I dont know where you live but why cant a 13year old take gaming serious? when its proven again and again that 13year old can take other interest serious and succeed in that field, also do you think guys like Ronaldo, Messi, or more american, your Brady´s or most of the NFL stars, only took it serious when they were past 13?

Also who said you cant get a job at 13? there are plenty of jobs out there, paperboy, pizza delivery, lawn mowing, clearing snow, or being an errand boy in a local supermarket/store. Or starting your own business.

So if this kid is really good and it shows, then he should keep at it and tell his parents that the year is 2013(14 soon) and today people can make a pretty decent living of the internet, and as long as he does well in school and that does not slip and have a fairly active social life , then they shouldn't worry.

If your mother is on your case, how about you suggest a compromise. Offer to save the same amount of money you spend on gaming for a car in a few years. Believe me, if you can plan for this now, it will help you out down the road. I say this as a parent of a 17 year old.

I'd also say that as a lifelong gamer, it's a good hobby to have but if you are truly doing this to the point where it's taking away from your other interests then she's right to nudge you toward more rewarding pursuits like your athletics and studies. Those are the things you will build your entire life around. Gaming has it's place, but all things in moderation. It's fine to veg out and game for a while. I still do it and I'm in my 40s. But I do it after other needs are met, when I know I can afford the time, and when my daughter or my family or my girlfriend don't need me to be doing something else.

Good luck, I hope it works out well for you.

@TheS

and i do stuff like rake leaves mow and shovel snow but i do waste it on gaming would've got a gaming pc if i had a place to put it

Answer is easy....
Become a parent.

When you become older you realize that buying a game is a better investment in entertainment than most activities. I'm not referring to the physical gains but other than that it's actually a really smart way to entertain with smaller amounts of money. You figure these days it costs roughly 30 cents a mile to drive a car. To go to the movies is roughly per person $10 plus popcorn and a drink for roughly 2 hours of non interactive entertainment. Gaming you dont drive and you entertain yourself for a minimum of 6 hours plus having to use your problem solving skills. And it's a sure way to keep from being exposed to drugs and alcohol and kids engaging in inappropriate behaviors. The only thing about gaming that is bad is it doesn't help you to develop good people skills and solving real life situations. But if your a gamer just make sure to eat healthy and do a few minutes of cardio everyday and you should be ok.

There is plenty of recent research that shows that games are in fact great exercise for the mind.

Google it and then show it to your Mum.

Furthermore, if you really want to be a game developer when you're older then having a thorough understanding of the game industry and your personal tastes, surely would be almost mandatory wouldn't it?

Tell that to you Mum too.

As long as you have a good social life, are keeping healthy and staying out of trouble then your gaming habits shouldn't be a problem! I'd only say you need to calm down on your gaming if its having a negative affect on your social life, and your school performance is going downhill. Reading your post that appears not to be the case, so I say continue what you're doing and follow your dreams!

If your mom is bringing up this argument on a "monthly" basis, I can think of one reason why, and it ain't game related

It's not what you say it's more of what you do. Show her you can play games in moderation effectively and you don't take them too seriously. Play some games that require teamwork or some that actually help with a skill or fitness ie rocksmith or wii games. The older generation have a tougher time understanding video games so look at it from her perspective; you are staring at a screen with a controller multiple hours a day when most likely she never had that luxury. Video games are awesome but don't let them hold you back from the things in life that will expand your mind and help you grow intellectually. Read a book, play an instrument, go hiking, camping, fishing, hunting, sports, hobbies and be SOCIAL. Don't limit yourself in life from all the things worth doing.

Make better grades. Then they can't claim that you are wasting your time with games.

agree.

Your parents are not wrong. In fact now I realized (at the age of 25 ) that they were right. I used to play games all the time, and because of that i was loosing my interest in studies and social activities. How important they are? you wont realize it at your current age.

Now how to convince. If you have your console, and if you manage to maintain Game and social life balance. You are good.

Dont play games for all day long, manage your schedule and they wont have any objection

Do some chores around the house and then ask ur parents if u could have a games console.

- To sit and play games all day is unhealthy, I used to do the same thing when I was your age. When I discovered other hobbies such as playing sports, I started to play games in moderation, this made both my school and social life better, and I also started to enjoy the games I played more.

- You shouldn't have a one track mind and make career plans at 13. With all due respect, you still have no idea about how the world works.

- You may have good grades now, but the older you get, the harder your schoolwork will become, and the more time you need to dedicate to it. If in a couple of years time you still sit and play games all day, those good grades will begin to fall fast.

- If I were you, I'd listen to your mum. The reason she's having a go at you is because you spend too much time gaming, and she's concerned not only about your health, but also your social life. If you want to convince her its okay to play video games, you need to find other hobbies and show you don't just play games all the time.

- In a few years time when you need to find a job and you if get your own place you'll realise just how right your parents were. While you may find video games fun, something tells me you'll get a huge wake-up call in a couple of years if you don't do something about your gaming habits, as reading your post it seems like you're obsessed. People may think I'm being harsh here, but that's what I think personally.

i don't have to, my mom might not like it, but she bought me SNES, gameboy and N64 when i was young and played Mario Kart with me.

umm hello its called school. i maintain a social life there. and i dont have long until i need to dedicate my self to a career. i have an IQ of 227 and know much about how the world works. "you may have good grades now, but the older you get, the harder your schoolwork will become." yeah well im pretty sure the older you get the smarter you get so the hardness of the work levels out. and like i said im not fat i might not be an all star athlete but im not fat and i dont over eat.and if you actually all my post i said i have a social life and i play 2 sports. so go take your dumbass somewhere else and stop wasting every bodies time

You might be smart, but you don't know everything with all due respect.

In the next argument tell her that games make you smarter, help eye coordination, makes you more creative, etc.

I convinced them by saying that I can learn english quickly with playing games :P

so im guessing you had an F in that class or something lol because thats not my problem. you made me laugh for a minute or two with that comment

@crazyman158: English is not my primary language. Not everyone in this world lives in US or in a country that uses english as the main language.. *sigh

oh my bad my apologies

Me neither my parents loved video games. My mom played 2600, NES, SNES, and Genesis a lot she quit playing until the Wii came out and she played some Wii games. Her favorite genre was Platformers and puzzle games she used to spend the whole day playing either Mario, Sonic, Tetris, or Doctor Mario.

My dad didn't play much video games he loved golf games and played GTA III with me when I was about 15 years old.

Sucks to have parents like that.

My parents were actually supportive my game collecting and playing. It was actually a hobby they BOTH tried to get into together, but they admitted they just don't have the attention span(games actually do require a lot of focus and attention, which is why simple crap like candy crushand flappy bird are so popular on phones.)

I never had to. Video games are my hobby so my parents never really infringed on that.

Can I get a link to this? Because if there isn't one, I'm very inclined to believe that this is a ridiculous statement, and if it's true, then I'm inclined to believe that the education system truly is failing. Pokemon is not the same level of reading as Dostoyevsky, Tolstoy, Joyce, Heller, David Foster Wallace or any of the other authors I read during my senior year of high school.

May I ask what games you play? How diverse is your collection and what do you enjoy playing the most?

There are some more interesting thought provoking experiences out there that might get your parents to ease up on your hobby a bit. I just finished Dear Esther; it's basically just exposition, but there are some pretty neat concepts and it only takes an hour to finish. I liked the Chemistry/Biology themes and symbolism that was added to the story.

I would advise to not spend every waking moment playing just games, but to balance it with other activities, I know you do sports and are a straight A student, but read more books and watch more movies if you don't already. Broaden all horizons.

You do actually have quite a while until you dedicate yourself to a career, and even then careers change over time. I remember going into highschool I wanted to be an engineer (I still could, my grades were on par). I settled on the Biology field for my major in college, thinking about being a doctor, then I thought maybe I'd just be a researcher, or a teacher, right now I'm thinking of being a pharmacist. School work does get a little harder, but if you got a good head on you and know how to partition your time, then you'll be fine. Everybody tends to overstate the amount of work in college courses.

Thoughts and ideas change over time they're never static, but it's good to have some goal in the future.

they might not like i play games a lot, but i am grown up and i do what i like. So gamers should stand their ground and say gaming is better than watching TV all day or sitting on FB talking trash

Yeah my parents were on the same boat, but when I really got into gaming my school grades started to sky rocket interestingly enough. They kind of left it alone at that point. It depends on the games, but many of them exercise the brain. They help with problem solving, eye-hand coordination, and mental reflexes.

oh boy my gaming collection is huge. When i owned my xbox 360 (i sold it to afford a ps4) i owned games from halo wars to gta 5. i owned some of the COD series never got much into though. I had BF3. Owned most of the Assassins creed franchise. i owned gta 5 and 4. owned civilization revolution. sims 3. and a lot of other types of shooters and a couple other free roam games

We all went through things like that when we were little kids.

Just respect the way your parents feel until you start paying for your own things and be grateful for the life they provide you.

I know you don't want to hear this but, your not old enough to know whats best for you yet or even what you want to do for the rest of your life a lot of things are going to change in between now and than.

She just wants whats best for you think of how much money she spends on you. You also have no idea the value of a dollar when you get older, get a job, have bills to pay, and more you'll learn the incredible sacrifice your parents make to raise you.

For the record 110 pounds depending on your height does not mean your healthy being underweight is just as unhealthy as being overweight

You should go outside, make friends, and enjoy the life of a teenager while it lasts it goes by really fast.

You know what? The best way for a parent to understand video games aren't bad is to make them play one on their free time. Maybe see what kind of things your mother likes to do and maybe put that thinking into a video game. So say she likes flowers or gardening. A good game for that is HayDay for the iPad/iPhone/Android. I know this because my mom is now addicted to that game. I am 22 years old and I got her addicted to a video game. Get your mom addicted to a video game that needs constant care. Maybe like an animal game or animal hospital game something along those lines and I predict she will never yell at you again buddy.

I'd just explain the alternatives.

Tell them that instead of sitting in a safe environment all day playing harmless video games you're going to go hang about near the local 7/11 with your friends like most 13 year olds. Eventually, through peer pressure, you may try shoplifting, smoking and even dabble in Alcohol. By the age of 15 while influenced by your peers you will move onto marijuana and drinking on a regular basis. You may or may not, through a drunken fumble in the back seat of a car, get your girlfriend pregnant and become a father at 16 thus ruining any chances of college and a decent career.

Or they can just let you play a bit GTA and become a responsible member of society with a great job and an exciting future ahead of you.