Call me out of touch, but for some reason I was under the impression that the marriage of video footage and PC games had broken up once everyone realized the limitations of the format. Well, Soldier Boyz is proof that companies still do use video footage in games - and that the results are as unsatisfying as ever.
Based on a 1995 action flick about a mission to rescue a billionaire's daughter whose plane is shot down during a relief mission in Vietnam, Solider Boyz is essentially a video-based shooting gallery. Gameplay is about as simple as it gets: Using a mouse or joystick to move a targeting crosshair that's superimposed over a screen of digitized video footage, you're supposed to shoot the bad guys and spare the good guys as you fight your way to the hideout of rebel and kidnapper Vinh Moc. If you're fast enough with your "talk" finger, you'll also get the friendlies to cough up some tips on how to get past tricky spots later in the game, such as choosing the correct path through a minefield or knowing which of several boxes contains explosives you need to complete the mission.
It would be unfair to expect a lot from this type of game, but what makes Solider Boyz such a snorebringer is that it doesn't deliver the little you do expect: good looks and good gameplay. To be fair, MPCA Interactive tried to keep things from getting monotonous by giving you different weapons - shotgun, pistol, M-16, AK-47, and others - depending on which of the six squad members you're controlling in a particular scene. And being able to get tips from talking to friendlies is a decent little touch, too. But those features aren't enough to overcome the problem of enemies appearing in exactly the same sequence and in the same place every time you play. This problem isn't unique to Soldier Boyz, but that doesn't change the fact that things get tedious pretty quickly.
Knowing exactly when and where every enemy will appear isn't in and of itself enough to sink a relatively unambitious game like Soldier Boyz, though; that's taken care of by the blocky video and sluggish input control. Because the game runs in full-screen mode at 320 x 200, jungle scenes deteriorate into a blurry mass of pixels with enemies emerging almost imperceptibly from the undergrowth - they look like someone on a talk show whose identity has been disguised. The visuals improve once you enter a village or building, but just as you're rejoicing that you can actually see your targets, you'll notice how sluggishly the targeting crosshair moves across the screen. Enduring sub-par video footage is one thing, but when you wind up dying over and over again simply because of a lagging crosshair, you'll probably be ready to dash off a quick e-mail to Vinh Moc and tell him he's welcome to that do-gooder American he shot down.
It doesn't look good, it doesn't play good; can Soldier Boyz find any other ways to offend? Mais oui! For starters, the six team members aren't exactly the sort you can easily identify with - unless you're an ax murderess, gun-wielding drug dealer, ultra-violent skinhead, or psychotic martial arts expert, that is. One particularly gratuitous scene involves a trip by one of the Boyz to a brothel to gain information; before the madam lets you talk to her girls, you have to win a shell game with a condom and teacups replacing the traditional shells and stone. If that isn't stupid enough, before you leave you'll have to shoot one of the working girls (she tried to shoot you first, so it's OK), one of Vinh Moc's soldiers who tries to "sound the alarm," and some guy who springs up from behind a bed and seizes one of the girls. Yeah, it's just a game, but it's still pretty unnerving to see our "soldier boy" smiling and waving a jaunty goodbye after gunning down three people in a whorehouse. And because Vinh Moc has his personal army spread all over Vietnam in an amazing array of disguises, you'll also get to shoot a beggar, a priest, a farm girl, and other wolves in sheep's clothing - and each kill is followed by a "cool" move like genuflecting over the priest or tossing some coins on the beggar's body. Wow, who said 'Nam was a bummer?
Soldier Boyz's big selling point is that it offers "blood spattering mayhem" (the phrase appears on every right-hand page of the sparse jewel-case manual) and "hundreds of real kills." There's no problem with that, but the bottom line is that if you're looking for gory movie violence, you're better off renting a John Woo flick than shelling out money for the predictable gameplay, muddy control, and cliched plot of Soldier Boyz. See you at Blockbuster.
