How should you tell your partner you're atheist

Iv been dating my girlfriend for about 8 months now and she still assumes im christian. I've been wanting to tell her for awhile but im afraid it will freak her out, where I come from atheism is almost a curse word...

The good news is she not a "bible beater", she more just identifies herself as christian and goes through the motion because its the only reality she knows. But I have heard her speak negatively about atheist in the past (awkward).  

Just wondering what experience any of you guys may have had? 

I'd just level with her man. If she is the one you have absolutely nothing to worry about.

It's a shame about where you're living. There are plenty of available women here with no belief in any deitiy/ies.

Besides, would you really have wanted to live a lie your whole life? Wouldn't it be cooler to have a non-believing partner with whom you can make jokes about religion? I don't know though, maybe she is just amazing for you.

I'm not from your whereabouts so my advice might be a complete culture shock. If you choose the advice of another, no sweat man.

I don't think I'd come straight out because it can be jarring for people who are religious even if they aren't devout. I would let out the info over a period of days/weeks rather than in one sitting. I would try to be as natural about it as possible using opportunities that may arise to let out bits and pieces about how you feel until the pieces can be fit together. This is the approach I've used. If you do it right they'll already have a good idea about your beliefs before the right time comes up to say it directly. People seem to take it better this way. At least in my experience.

Hope this helps. My wife and everyone else I'm surrounded by is Christian as well...

I don't think I'd come straight out because it can be jarring for people who are religious even if they aren't devout. I would let out the info over a period of days/weeks rather than in one sitting. I would try to be as natural about it as possible using opportunities that may arise to let out bits and pieces about how you feel until the pieces can be fit together. This is the approach I've used. If you do it right they'll already have a good idea about your beliefs before the right time comes up to say it directly. People seem to take it better this way. At least in my experience.

Hope this helps. My wife and everyone else I'm surrounded by is Christian as well...

junglist101

So is your wife a big christian? Like goes to church every sunday and prays before every meal type?

And what about your kids? What do you guys teach them? (if you dont mind me asking) 

[QUOTE="junglist101"]

I don't think I'd come straight out because it can be jarring for people who are religious even if they aren't devout. I would let out the info over a period of days/weeks rather than in one sitting. I would try to be as natural about it as possible using opportunities that may arise to let out bits and pieces about how you feel until the pieces can be fit together. This is the approach I've used. If you do it right they'll already have a good idea about your beliefs before the right time comes up to say it directly. People seem to take it better this way. At least in my experience.

Hope this helps. My wife and everyone else I'm surrounded by is Christian as well...

nintendogamer6

So is your wife a big christian? Like goes to church every sunday and prays before every meal type?

And what about your kids? What do you guys teach them? (if you dont mind me asking)

My wife goes to church most Sundays and occasionally reads her bible. No praying before meals although the rest of my family does that including at restaurants and they want to do it holding hands sometimes:? My wife has actually taken it pretty well but to be fair she is pretty simplistic in her beliefs. I only came out to her within the last year not to long after I became an atheist myself.

My wife is pregnant with our first kid so I can only share what my plans are. I'm not planning to make any declarations to my wife about her bringing my daughter to church. I think teaching my daughter about life will be situational so I don't think I can plan too much on what I will say. Fundamentally I'm hoping to raise her to be a good person for the sake of being good and I'm planning to do my best to be a good example for her.

I know what you mean about "everyone is assumed to be Christian". You can drop hints but it is so unfathomable to them that you would not believe in God that it doesn't even register. I get this with my parents. I've even straight out told both of them that I'm not really into church and they still don't get it. If anything they assume I've soured on the people and their hypocrisy, but my faith never comes into question.

I think it's important to place a value on whether or not someone knows your an atheist. For example, my grandparents were pastors. It would break their hearts to know I was an atheist. I stand to gain absolutely nothing from them knowing how I truly feel.

Good luck with your girl. That is one person who is going to need to know how you feel. Get her mind moving with some loaded questions that you "innocently" wish to know the answer to as well like why God put the tree in the garden knowing that man would eat the fruit and why God only seems to answer prayers for silly things like A's on your exams but ignores the suffering in the world.

@junglist101

Well thanks for the advice. I guess ill just have to let her know cause I def dont think she'll accept the fact that im atheist unless I tell her. It's just to unreasonable of a thought to her at this point.

I just wish Christians wouldn't be so damn stubborn about there beliefs. I know for a fact if my gf were given the facts without any biased she would feel differently. I just hopes she understands why I believe what I do and at least accepts it as a realistic theory. 

Jung, praying at the table in a restaurant? Wow, I've never seen that before. May I ask where you reside? :P

Jung, praying at the table in a restaurant? Wow, I've never seen that before. May I ask where you reside? :P

wis3boi

Fortunately, I rarely eat out with them anymore.

Southern California

[QUOTE="wis3boi"]

Jung, praying at the table in a restaurant? Wow, I've never seen that before. May I ask where you reside? :P

junglist101

Fortunately, I rarely eat out with them anymore.

Southern California

Odd, was expecting a bible belt answer :P aka Jesusland :D