When you have your own kids, how do you plan to moderate their gaming?

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UT_Wrestler

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#1 UT_Wrestler
Member since 2004 • 16426 Posts

Since my first child is due in about 2 months, I started thinking about how I'd moderate his gaming when he gets old enough to play video games. It's kind of weird thinking that I'll have to parent someone else on gaming since I've been a lifelong gamer myself.Here are some of the things I was thinking about doing, so let me know what you think of them or what things you'd do differentl

1. Limit game time to 1 hour a day. He can spend the rest of his free time playing outside, playing with other toys, or reading.
2. No video games until after homework is completed
3. He only acquire new games as a birthday/christmas gift, or by earning money from doing chores
4. He will not be allowed to play T rated games until he is 10, and cannot play M-rated games until he is 15

Do you think my rules sound fair, or am I being too strict?

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MasterBolt360

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#2 MasterBolt360
Member since 2009 • 5293 Posts

All the rules sound excellent, and I'm a teen. The only thing I would say is lower the M age to 14, many kids at my school who are 14 only play M games. So say he was going to get something like Xbox Live, he might run into a problem. Other than that, I wish you were my dad!

EDIT: One more thing, if he follows all your rules and does his chores regularly, you should reward him with more gaming time. Kids and teens see that as encouragement, and will continue to do their job, only better. (This way, no need to pass out allowance!)

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UT_Wrestler

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#3 UT_Wrestler
Member since 2004 • 16426 Posts

All the rules sound excellent, and I'm a teen. The only thing I would say is lower the M age to 14, many kids at my school who are 14 only play M games. So say he was going to get something like Xbox Live, he might run into a problem. Other than that, I wish you were my dad!

MasterBolt360
Thanks for the compliment. I'm going to try my best!
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MasterBolt360

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#4 MasterBolt360
Member since 2009 • 5293 Posts
[QUOTE="MasterBolt360"]

All the rules sound excellent, and I'm a teen. The only thing I would say is lower the M age to 14, many kids at my school who are 14 only play M games. So say he was going to get something like Xbox Live, he might run into a problem. Other than that, I wish you were my dad!

UT_Wrestler
Thanks for the compliment. I'm going to try my best!

I made an extra remark. Its the same message, just edited.
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izdan

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#5 izdan
Member since 2009 • 741 Posts

All the rules sound excellent, and I'm a teen. The only thing I would say is lower the M age to 14, many kids at my school who are 14 only play M games. So say he was going to get something like Xbox Live, he might run into a problem. Other than that, I wish you were my dad!

EDIT: One more thing, if he follows all your rules and does his chores regularly, you should reward him with more gaming time. Kids and teens see that as encouragement, and will continue to do their job, only better. (This way, no need to pass out allowance!)

MasterBolt360

this :D

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Toriko42

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#6 Toriko42
Member since 2006 • 27562 Posts
I'd be a hypocrite to be as strict as you are but they'll similar to how I was brought up 1. T Rated Games when you turn 10 2. M Rated Games when you turn 13-14 (Depending on maturity and on the game, I won't let my kid play GTA till 15 for instance) 3. No more then four hours a day on the weekends, two hours on weekdays
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MasterBolt360

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#7 MasterBolt360
Member since 2009 • 5293 Posts
[QUOTE="Toriko42"]I'd be a hypocrite to be as strict as you are but they'll similar to how I was brought up 1. T Rated Games when you turn 10 2. M Rated Games when you turn 13-14 (Depending on maturity and on the game, I won't let my kid play GTA till 15 for instance) 3. No more then four hours a day on the weekends, two hours on weekdays

This sounds perfect. Listen to this guy.
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UT_Wrestler

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#8 UT_Wrestler
Member since 2004 • 16426 Posts
So you two think I'm being too strict?
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Toriko42

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#9 Toriko42
Member since 2006 • 27562 Posts
So you two think I'm being too strict?UT_Wrestler
It's a bit harsh, if your kid knows you're a game he might call you out for it when he's a lot older. I think for someone who'll be a young child though, it's perfect. 1 hour a day is all those kids need. 6-10 year olds should be outside, that's how it was for me even though I had a Playstation to play with :P
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MasterBolt360

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#10 MasterBolt360
Member since 2009 • 5293 Posts

So you two think I'm being too strict?UT_Wrestler
Not too strict, just mis-informed. Kids ages 13-14 start playing M games, and I just think he might get teased because he can't play M games until he is 15. But as far as how LONG he plays, is fine with me, although my parents don't care about my gameplay time, and only about my computer time.

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TJamesA

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#11 TJamesA
Member since 2007 • 570 Posts

I guess you can liken an M rating on a game to a PG-13 rating on a movie, best of luck to you! Your rules sounded very reasonable too.

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Toriko42

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#12 Toriko42
Member since 2006 • 27562 Posts
Oh yeah and congratulations an your child :)
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IKSSE

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#13 IKSSE
Member since 2009 • 86 Posts

Oh dear god im going to be a terrible dad...i was gonna let him do whatever he wanted as long as he kept his grades up and stayed out of prison

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Treflis

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#14 Treflis
Member since 2004 • 13757 Posts
For starters I'll be very strict with the age rating, which will be hypocritical since I played Doom at the age of 6, for both games and Movies. E-rated They can play, Teen rated games They can play once he hits puberty and Mature,depending on how mature and sensible he/she is I might let them play them when they're 16 and up, if not then they'll have to wait until they're 18. I'll also agree on the "No videogames until after your homework is done properly" In addition, since it will most likely be me that buy the newer consoles I expect them to be taken good care off. In particular the old ones I have aswell as the games.
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Tuky06

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#15 Tuky06
Member since 2007 • 5026 Posts

Everything's fine, I just don't agree with the 1 hour limit, i think you should let him play as long as he wants, but make him stop whenever you feel its necesary.

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Mr_Anderson1817

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#17 Mr_Anderson1817
Member since 2009 • 479 Posts

I think M is the new T, honestly look at all the games that have come out this fall all the big name ones are rated M. I would lower the age to play M to 13 or 14. 1 hour a day is not very much. I wouldn't let them have a tv in their room, I had good grades until I got a tv in my room to play games on then my grades went to hell.

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UT_Wrestler

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#18 UT_Wrestler
Member since 2004 • 16426 Posts

Everything's fine, I just don't agree with the 1 hour limit, i think you should let him play as long as he wants, but make him stop whenever you feel its necesary.

Tuky06
Well I don't want my kid getting fat. He needs to play outside and get some exercise.
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PetJel

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#20 PetJel
Member since 2009 • 3725 Posts

Everything's fine, I just don't agree with the 1 hour limit, i think you should let him play as long as he wants, but make him stop whenever you feel its necesary.

Tuky06
Below age 10 a kid really, REALLY shouldn't play for more than an hour a day. A friend of mine had a younger brother that gamed like 4-5 hours a day from a very young age, the parents just let him go and he turned out friendless and very socially derailed throughout his childhood with no ability to get good contacts, anger outbursts and a big lack of responsibility. I think it's important for a kid below 12 that you as a parent have to be in control and set a certain rule. You can every now and then allow him to play a little longer when he has a new game or has friends over. And imo a kid should be able to game 2-3 hours a day from 11-15 (at age 11 being strict and towards 15 less strict but more as a guidance and advice) and after that he can do whatever, he is old enough to deceide for himself and take full responsibility by then. Teen games from age 10/11 and mature games from age 15.
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supertegwyn

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#21 supertegwyn
Member since 2005 • 1584 Posts

I was playing MA games when i was 10 (but then again i was very mature for my age; i read the lord of the rings when i was 9), and i could play for 2 hours.

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Desulated

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#22 Desulated
Member since 2005 • 30952 Posts

Meh, for me, it won'tbe in the near future. But anyways...

1. Gaming limit of 2 hours a day.
2. All homework must be done before playing.
3. No M rated games until 15. (T rated is alright, there's not a lot of difference IMO).

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wiistation36000

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#23 wiistation36000
Member since 2009 • 215 Posts

1 hour for start, but it should go up as he/she gets older.

Rather than limiting the age based on what the ESRB says, I think you should make your own choices.

I personally think as long as the kid understands the difference between reality and fantasy, and knows that bad actions in real life result in consequences regardless of age, he's good to play just about any game.

The other rules sound good.

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imthemostwanted

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#24 imthemostwanted
Member since 2008 • 988 Posts
mine would be: 1. They can play as much as they want on weekends, providing they spend some time outside first 2. on school days i wont let them play till after dinner and they have to have done their homework. 3. if they want a game, they have to buy it. unless i want it aswell, or it's christmas or birthday. 4. no m rated games till they're 14 at least. me and my kid'll have separate consoles aswell. so we can play online :D. but i get the 70" bravia. he gets the older tv *evil laugh*
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CarnageHeart

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#25 CarnageHeart
Member since 2002 • 18316 Posts

I've never screened my kids from certain T rated games (Virtua Fighter springs to mind). They are limited to roughtly one hour of playtime a day (if we hit the time limit in the mdidle of an LBP level, we finish the level).

Don't know when I will let them play M rated games (that's years off, though they will see/play the likes of Fat Princess years before they see/play GTA since I am more worried about sexual content than violence).

Bear in mind that limiting what yours kids are exposed to means limiting who they can visit (I don't let my kids visit friends whose parents believe in letting kids watch R rated movies or MTV or what have you).

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UpInFlames

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#26 UpInFlames
Member since 2004 • 13301 Posts
I'm not a parent, but I really doubt I'd base my decisions on any kind of ratings, especially the likes of ESRB. I should be the one informed about the content and base my decision on not only the content, but also the child. Not every M-rated game is the same (Halo and Manhunt are like night and day, what's the difference between Virtua Fighter and Dead or Alive?) just as not all children are the same.
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Tannerr33

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#27 Tannerr33
Member since 2004 • 896 Posts

Your list seems pretty reasonable. As they get older though I would increase the time they can play. When it comes to game ratings I wouldn't monitor the game ratings, but rather the games themselves. I have a couple of little sisters (7 and 12) who like to play and I always check the game out before they play it and make sure its appropiate for them. I've come across M games that hardly deserved the rating and T games that probably deserved the M rating.

One other thing, don't get suckered into them letting you sign them up for one of those web browser games like webkins. I saw one of my sisters playing that and it looked innocent enough (you buy stuffed animals at stores like walmart and go online with them) and so I watched them play for about 10minutes and its basically just a huge chat room full of pedophiles and inappropiate content. I got them off that crap asap once I saw that.

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Gammit10

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#28 Gammit10
Member since 2004 • 2397 Posts

I have young kids and this is what I do:

1.) Know your kids: you can have one 12 year-old that isn't mature enough for a teen game, and then his/her little sibling may be the opposite. Play it by ear

2.) Observe your kids: know what they're playing, what it's like, and play it with them if you can.

3.) Teach them to balance their time: time spent with friends, with videogames, going outside... it all needs to be managed. Instead of enforcing arbitrary times, teach them why spending days locked inside isn't healthy, and then take them somewhere else when they're young.

4.) Be the role model: your kids will do what you do, not what you say. Don't spend all of your time locked indoors either, and avoid playing any game on XBL while the kids are awake. Even then, mute the punks that use foul language (this can be foryour own sanity too) or wear headphones.

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CD-i_ownz

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#29 CD-i_ownz
Member since 2009 • 494 Posts

I think M is the new T, honestly look at all the games that have come out this fall all the big name ones are rated M. I would lower the age to play M to 13 or 14. 1 hour a day is not very much. I wouldn't let them have a tv in their room, I had good grades until I got a tv in my room to play games on then my grades went to hell.

Mr_Anderson1817
I really, really reccomend that you stick really close to the ESRB guidlines, especially the infamous M rating, which should be at age 16, 17, just whenever you start to see real responsibility and adulthood in him. The T rating has quite a bit of weight behind it now too, so I advise again that you should stick to the age of 13 before he can own any of those games. Let him play mild stuff at a friend's house (I played Halo 2 first in sunday school) but steer him away from specific explicit games his friends might have. My advice with your son and video games is to be a role model and steer him clear of the newest consoles to build a good moral core and neighborhood friends until at least age eight. Also make sure that all the coolest and most fun things to do are not in front of a TV screen. If you don't mind turning your house into a warzone for the next ten years the best reccomendation I can give you is an arsenal of Nerf guns for your kid and his buddies to wage war with. unbelievable fun and exercise.
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#30 G4me_0ver
Member since 2007 • 25 Posts

1. So he can play outside, with toys or read in spare time as much as they like but not game? They may not enjoy any of those things. What if they really like gaming? 1 hour is not much. What if they only play games on the weekends/rarely? Still a 1 hour limit?

2. Blackmail? I can understand wanting homework finished but using games as a means to get it done is just ...if that was me i'd be so pissed off. You should teach him why he should do his homework and why it's important, not that no homework = no games. As long as homework is done gaming shouldn't be restricted.

3. No pocket money or such? Doesn't sound like the kid'll have any games to play unless they fancy doing jobs for you all the time. If you reward well for doing them then it doesn't sound so bad..

4. I think you should know your child and what's in the game to decide if they are mature enough to play it.

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Legolas_Katarn

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#31 Legolas_Katarn
Member since 2003 • 15556 Posts

I see no reason to put a time limit, unless we have something to do or I just wanted my kid off because they had homework or something. Since I was three I spent most of my time playing games, when I got a little older it was a mixture of playing games and reading. That would be hours a day of doing either one, if I had only an hour a day to play games I would have been very bored most of the time. I hated going outside and doing things like playing sports and I still do now. I'd probably let my kid play T rated games whenever they want, some of my first games were Wolfenstein 3D when I was around three and Duke Nukem when I was six. M rated games it would just depend, Saints Row and GTA could wait awhile, games like Call of Duty MW I don't see them as any worse than a T game.

1. Limit game time to 1 hour a day. 3. He only acquire new games as a birthday/christmas gift, or by earning money from doing chores

I never understood such low hourly limits, especially when combined with no games before homework. Doesn't that mean that after going to school and doing homework that they would only have only a little bit of time to do things like play outside, unless you want your kid running around in the middle of the night. So after being outside for awhile what do you want them to do the rest of the time? I always hated going outside and doing things like playing sports anyway and I still do now. Reading is fine but not everyone enjoys that and it has to be done a lot for school anyway, also are you saying that you won't buy your kid video games but you will buy them books and toys? Why do you care if he plays videogames or with some other toy anyway?

Doesn't sound like your kid would be getting games that often unless you paying them for chores would be a usual thing. My parents used to let me rent games. I don't know why you would buy them toys but not games, but if it is because of money renting is more affordable.

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GeoffZak

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#32 GeoffZak
Member since 2007 • 3715 Posts

Back when I was in middle school, 5-7th grade, my parents would only let me play games on friday's, weekends and other days I had no school.(I never did homework on fridays.) They didn't mind how long I played, just as long as I got my school and homework done.After a while my parents saw that I was taking school seriously and doing well, so they allowed me to play video games any day of the week. Things worked out well. Without the distraction of games durring the school week your kid may not try to rush through his homework to play his360 or whatever.

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DarkGamer007

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#33 DarkGamer007
Member since 2008 • 6033 Posts

1) Teen games at 10

2) Some Mature (Games that shouldn't be T or M but somewhere inbetween like Halo) games at 13

3) All Mature rated games at 15

4) Can play whenever of any length of time as long as he stays in shape, it doesn't affect his studies are has a healthy social life outside of games.

That is about it. Limiting game time never works. :P My parents tried it and I always broke it. :P

On a side note, we need a T+ or 15+ rating because as I mention some M rated games shouldn't really be rated M or T. I think Halo and Call of Duty are perfect examples of those types of games.

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batman0811

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#34 batman0811
Member since 2007 • 171 Posts

i have two little girls(dont know how much gaming they're going to want and do) and my idea is that i have to treat each case a little different. if one of my kids likes to be by herself why should i force her to goout and play. kids are just like people no one is the same. the only thing i would do is maybe regulate their playing time during the weekdays. I agree chores and homework needs to be done 1st, then games or whatever there into. Also the whole being fat thing is a little bit much, if you feed your child healthy food why would they get fat sitting down playing games. and the whole M or T situation really depends on my child maturity level. All in all you seem to care and thats the most important thing, just make sure that your encouraging your child to be themselves and not what you want them to be.

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UT_Wrestler

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#35 UT_Wrestler
Member since 2004 • 16426 Posts
Thanks for all your input and suggestions. I think I'll probably raise the time limit on playing games once he gets older, but I still feel the need to stay consistent with some sort of boundary on time. I also like the idea of rewarding him by letting him rent a game on weekends if he does well in school that week. I also understand what many of you are saying about the ESRB ratings not being consistent, so I'll definitely play it by ear when deciding what games are appropriate. I noticed some of you were criticizing me for having a rule that he needs to do his homework before he can play games, and I really don't get that one. I mean I'm not going to let him eat ice cream before he eats his vegetables, so why would I let him play before he gets his important work done?
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WestSideAzn

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#36 WestSideAzn
Member since 2003 • 2218 Posts
[QUOTE="UT_Wrestler"][QUOTE="MasterBolt360"]

All the rules sound excellent, and I'm a teen. The only thing I would say is lower the M age to 14, many kids at my school who are 14 only play M games. So say he was going to get something like Xbox Live, he might run into a problem. Other than that, I wish you were my dad!

Thanks for the compliment. I'm going to try my best!

I will actually second what he said. Although from what my own dad did, he didn't let me play video games while school was in session. Only during breaks would he let me play my games. He started to get lenient as I got older though. However, that was just my dad. I think those rules are fair. Remember though, homework doesn't end with the papers being completed. At least make sure your child knows what he learned, and didn't finish his homework just to play video games.
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UT_Wrestler

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#37 UT_Wrestler
Member since 2004 • 16426 Posts
[QUOTE="UT_Wrestler"][QUOTE="MasterBolt360"]

All the rules sound excellent, and I'm a teen. The only thing I would say is lower the M age to 14, many kids at my school who are 14 only play M games. So say he was going to get something like Xbox Live, he might run into a problem. Other than that, I wish you were my dad!

WestSideAzn
Thanks for the compliment. I'm going to try my best!

I will actually second what he said. Although from what my own dad did, he didn't let me play video games while school was in session. Only during breaks would he let me play my games. He started to get lenient as I got older though. However, that was just my dad. I think those rules are fair. Remember though, homework doesn't end with the papers being completed. At least make sure your child knows what he learned, and didn't finish his homework just to play video games.

Oh definitely. I'll be checking his homework and having him fix any mistakes before he's allowed to go play.
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WestSideAzn

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#38 WestSideAzn
Member since 2003 • 2218 Posts
[QUOTE="WestSideAzn"][QUOTE="UT_Wrestler"] Thanks for the compliment. I'm going to try my best!UT_Wrestler
I will actually second what he said. Although from what my own dad did, he didn't let me play video games while school was in session. Only during breaks would he let me play my games. He started to get lenient as I got older though. However, that was just my dad. I think those rules are fair. Remember though, homework doesn't end with the papers being completed. At least make sure your child knows what he learned, and didn't finish his homework just to play video games.

Oh definitely. I'll be checking his homework and having him fix any mistakes before he's allowed to go play.

Cool. Sounds good! I wish you luck!
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KillerWabbit23

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#39 KillerWabbit23
Member since 2009 • 3466 Posts

What I would do, even though it won't happen for almost ten-ish years:

1. Video game time: 1 hour if schoolday/not a lot of time, 2 hrs. if weekend/no homework

2. Age limits: T games at about 9-10, that's when I got my first T game (Smash Bros. Melee) M games, depends on what it is. Games like Halo, with aliens, not a whole lot of blood and such, probably around 12-13. Games like GTA- 14-15.

I am a younger-aged teen, around 13-14, and I know from experience how frustrating it is to be denied something like COD: MW2 when all your friends are playing it.

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rockguy92

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#40 rockguy92
Member since 2007 • 21559 Posts
I don't plan on having kids (my thoughts right now).
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Kage1

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#41 Kage1
Member since 2003 • 6806 Posts

I have a son 20 years old. He was playing MK2 at 4 years old.

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UT_Wrestler

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#42 UT_Wrestler
Member since 2004 • 16426 Posts
I don't plan on having kids (my thoughts right now).rockguy92
A lot of people say that when they're younger, including me. But then I realized what a sad life I would have lived if became 70 years old with no family to call my own.
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supertegwyn

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#43 supertegwyn
Member since 2005 • 1584 Posts

[QUOTE="rockguy92"]I don't plan on having kids (my thoughts right now).UT_Wrestler
A lot of people say that when they're younger, including me. But then I realized what a sad life I would have lived if became 70 years old with no family to call my own.

THAT'S WHAT SHE SAID! HAHAHAHAHAHHAH! Nah just kidding.

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DOS4dinner

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#44 DOS4dinner
Member since 2008 • 1072 Posts

Hmm...Well, I played Duke Nukem 3D, Doom, and Heretic when I was four...So, probably same rules :P

I'll probably just play it by ear though. If they're mature enough at any age, they can play whatever they want. (Assuming homework is done and grades acceptable). MMOs, however, will have stricter rules. Or won't be allowed, either one.

Or I'll just tell them one rule:
"If it runs in DOSBox, you can play it all you want".

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hammerofcrom

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#45 hammerofcrom
Member since 2009 • 1323 Posts

Oh dear god im going to be a terrible dad...i was gonna let him do whatever he wanted as long as he kept his grades up and stayed out of prison

IKSSE

lol, pretty much this for me as well. although he'll get some manual labor just to remind him WHY he should get good grades and not do stupid ****. worked for me, and I've been playing games like Mortal Kombat since I was 5. I knew the difference between game and reality back then, but I've always been a step ahead.

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st0kedout

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#46 st0kedout
Member since 2006 • 204 Posts
i think im gonna tell my kids that they can play as much as they want as long as they have decent grades. and if they dont have decent grades then ill take it away
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Desulated

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#47 Desulated
Member since 2005 • 30952 Posts

Thanks for all your input and suggestions. I think I'll probably raise the time limit on playing games once he gets older, but I still feel the need to stay consistent with some sort of boundary on time. I also like the idea of rewarding him by letting him rent a game on weekends if he does well in school that week. I also understand what many of you are saying about the ESRB ratings not being consistent, so I'll definitely play it by ear when deciding what games are appropriate. I noticed some of you were criticizing me for having a rule that he needs to do his homework before he can play games, and I really don't get that one. I mean I'm not going to let him eat ice cream before he eats his vegetables, so why would I let him play before he gets his important work done?UT_Wrestler

lol, no problem man. Good luck raising your kid.

As for homework, I suggest you should assist him in that area when he asks you. Try not to yell at him or call him an idiot (that's what my dad did anyways when I didn't understand math-it's advanced math....) because it really demoralizes the kid's self-esteem.

And yes, in order to limit his playing time, you should go out and do outdoor activities with him. After all, you're the role model and he'll respect you for that.

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-eddy-

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#48 -eddy-
Member since 2006 • 11443 Posts
Hmm... what age are we talking about? 8, 10, 13? In general I don't plan on restricting too much, I'm just happy if I get a (reasonable) gamer kid. :D Here are some things however for me young gamer: No extreme gore games. Not extremely sexual content. Can't game all their free-time alone. If they start raging or start showing any signs of those awful XBL-kids it's time for a break. I would try to encourage neutral themed games, like racing and maybe RPG's, platformers... Also try to make them play with friends, co-op and things where you're working together.
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kaim_i

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#49 kaim_i
Member since 2005 • 959 Posts
buy him a really old system like the nes, snes, sega,etc.. , so that he has appreciation for old school gaming, plus the game are cheap for those system. If you want to make your kid anti game, get them a very bad game, get them superman for the n64. somehing along that line.
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btaylor2404

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#50 btaylor2404
Member since 2003 • 11353 Posts
Knowing you a bit UT_Wrestler, I think you've thought this out and it's very fair. My step-son, 15, can only play games on the weekends, or watch TV for that matter. T at 10 sounded about right. I still don't let him play GTAIV or hardcore M games. He's ok with it, it's been the rule since Kindergarten. He loves watching me play, and I just finished AC II, and I let him watch about 15 minutes per night before bed, I normally don't play unless he's asleep, in the interest of fairness. My only issue is #3. I'm the ones that buys all the games, he rarely, if ever buys any, just plays all of mine :P.