Lost Planet will leave you lost... confused... frightened... and so much more.

User Rating: 5.5 | Lost Planet: Extreme Condition X360
Capcom's Lost Planet is a mess of confusing a story-line and terribly clichéd dialogue. When you first start playing the game, you may think to yourself "Hey, this is kinda fun"; but that soon changes. It is fairly evident early on that the developers/writers were lazy when creating the game, so they slapped together a bunch of ridiculous clichés and monsters and shoved it through a garbarator (Yes, that is a word). The result is the "game" we know as Lost Planet.

You play as Wayne. Some random guy who meets up with some other random guys and an arguably "hawt chick". For some reason you are on a planet with a bunch of snow; you never really find out why. It turns out that there are creatures on this planet, called "Akrid", with weird glowing bulbs attached to their bodies (possibly for reproductive purposes). If you shoot the strange orange light-bulbs, you receive thermal energy; which keeps Wayne alive. (He seems to be the only character who actually needs this stuff). There are also Snow Pirates, and some random group of people called NEVEC. We don't really care about them.

You're probably asking "Shawn, what is this game about?" Well, to be honest, I have no ****ing clue. This is because the plot completely changes after every mission. There never really is a point to all this; you're just killing things and stealing their bodily fluids for warmth.

So, you may be thinking "Well, the story sucks; but maybe the gameplay makes up for it", you'd be wrong. Imagine, if you will: a field of snow, you're walking. Suddenly, a giant thing with claws pops its enormous head out of the ground and says " 'Ello chap, care for a spot of tea?". That might as well be what happens because it would at least be entertaining. Instead, you'll find yourself being bombarded with missiles/projectiles/bodily fluids which are made up of lord knows what. It's nearly impossible to move three feet without being knocked over by some huge explosion. Once you think you've had enough of each level, and you're ready to move on; congratulations, you've made it to the boss. But don't worry, you get to use an amazing contraption called a "Vital Suit", which is just about as useful as Wayne's hat. You'll last about 12 seconds before your VS explodes, and you're left to fight off the leviathan on your own.

At this point, you must be thinking "But Shawn, there must be something you liked about this game", and I would have to agree. There are exactly two (2) things I actually enjoy about this ridiculous mangled mess the developers so prematurely called a "game". The visuals are impressive. It is an older game, but it lives up to the power of the 360 quite nicely. The other positive quality of Lost Planet is the AI. Although it may be difficult to believe, your enemies are not idiots. They will run for cover, and even try to find an ideal vantage-point. They do yell stupid phrases like "NEVEC forever!" and "Intruder takes priority"; but excluding that dialogue would mean Capcom actually did something right.

If you're thinking of buying this game, don't. It's not worth the money, even though it is relatively inexpensive. But if won't take my word for it, and still want to play it; at least do yourself a favour and simply rent it.