I like a girl that I'm friends with...what should/shouldn't I do?

There's this girl at my school that I've known for nearly 10 years, and that I've been close friends with for a very long time. Though we're friends, I've sometimes found it rather hard to talk to or get close to her since she's practically in the popular crowd. If I didn't know her at all, I would say that she's totally out of my league. That may somewhat be the case now but the fact that she and I are friends may be an asset for me, or so I'd like to think.

I'd just like to know, what advice do you guys have for me? What should I do, and what shouldn't I? Since she and I are already friends, I don't have to worry about the basic step (approaching her and talking to her for the first time, getting to know her). I just want to know what to do and what not to since, unlike my other friends who are girls, I actually like her.

Would it be weird for me to wait for her at the end of class so I could walk with her, or would that be weird and cause her to get suspicious? This shouldn't be hard for me, since she is usually one of the last ones to leave the classroom. But I need advice, I really want to know what to do since I really have no experience with this stuff. I've never had a girlfriend or a date or anything like that, which may explain why I'm asking all of you for advice. I don't really know what to do to make things move forward at this point, so I would really appreciate some help.

Seriously, after that long you should know if she feels the same or not. I wouldn't bring it up. If you do though, just be honest and don't expect to be friends anymore afterwords if she doesn't feel the same way.

There's this girl at my school that I've known for nearly 10 years, and that I've been close friends with for a very long time. Though we're friends, I've sometimes found it rather hard to talk to or get close to her since she's practically in the popular crowd. If I didn't know her at all, I would say that she's totally out of my league. That may somewhat be the case now but the fact that she and I are friends may be an asset for me, or so I'd like to think.

I'd just like to know, what advice do you guys have for me? What should I do, and what shouldn't I? Since she and I are already friends, I don't have to worry about the basic step (approaching her and talking to her for the first time, getting to know her). I just want to know what to do and what not to since, unlike my other friends who are girls, I actually like her.

Would it be weird for me to wait for her at the end of class so I could walk with her, or would that be weird and cause her to get suspicious? This shouldn't be hard for me, since she is usually one of the last ones to leave the classroom. But I need advice, I really want to know what to do since I really have no experience with this stuff. I've never had a girlfriend or a date or anything like that, which may explain why I'm asking all of you for advice. I don't really know what to do to make things move forward at this point, so I would really appreciate some help.

Tigerman950

When the two of you are alone (not around friends or other people), explain your feelings to her. If she doesn't feel the same way about you, drop the matter, don't pursue her if she says no (I made that mistake once, it ended badly).

You could always ask her out on a date.

Seriously, after that long you should know if she feels the same or not. I wouldn't bring it up. If you do though, just be honest and don't expect to be friends anymore afterwords if she doesn't feel the same way.

Pirate700

You can tell if a girl likes you.. if it's just friends chances are you might ruin your reletionship if you try to take it further.. once you're in the friend zone girls dont see you the same way at all.

But.. no matter what any of us say.. the fact reminds there is no reward without risk. IF you really like her... go for it. No reason to sit around waiting to die. If you're going to be unhappy might as well be unhappy at least attempting to be happy.

Figure out a way to get to know if she's interested without her knowing or word spreading.

I didn't, and one of my good friends who I also liked (who is unbelievably gorgeous) liked me at the same time but I was not aware of it.

So learn if she's interested, and pursue if she does.

If not, let the friendship remain. Who knows what she'll think two years from now? ;)

You shouldn't bring it on the Gamespot Forums. :P

When you two are alone just explain your feelings to her. Say that you really value your friendship and no matter what you wish to remain friends, because it is possible. If you don't get a straight-out no, just ask if you think that there is even a possibility that in the future you and her could end up in a relationship. Also, do it in a casual environment where you both feel comfortable.

Believe me, the sooner you do it the better. Who knows, you could find out that she feels the same way about you

Seriously, after that long you should know if she feels the same or not. I wouldn't bring it up. If you do though, just be honest and don't expect to be friends anymore afterwords if she doesn't feel the same way.

Pirate700

Well I didn't really realize my feelings for her until recently. This summer she came back from Dubai, where she had been living for 4 years (though she visited America every summer, and she along with her fraternal twin sister would hang out with my friends and I upon visiting). But she is attending my school in my home city once again (where she had lived before she moved). I'm still friends with her and her sister, the same way it has been before she ever moved and every summer when she came to visit, which is good. But upon coming back she has become rather popular and has a rather large crowd, so it gets somewhat difficult to get close to her at times. But I don't think that will ever stop us from being good friends.

well this could go two ways

1. you tell her you like her and ask her out, she says yeah

2. you tell her you like her and you get a friendly rejection and things will most likely be akward around you guys from that point on

the outcome depends on 2 things

1. are you ugly

2.are you popular

Does it seem like she is interested in you as well?AAllxxjjnn

I don't think so, but she thinks I'm funny and that I'm nice, according to another friend of mine (one of her BFFs). So there's a plus.

You should touch her shoulder. That will send the message. You can always pour your heart out to her in a love letter as well.

[QUOTE="AAllxxjjnn"]Does it seem like she is interested in you as well?Tigerman950

I don't think so, but she thinks I'm funny and that I'm nice, according to another friend of mine (one of her BFFs). So there's a plus.

I think you should tell her how you feel. Although if she doesn't like you it would be very akward between you two. Don't do it if you really don't want to risk not being friends anymore. But if you don't do it, you might never know if she liked you. Do it before she gets a boyfriend, very soon. If you truly like her, do everything you can to get her, don't let her slip away.

You could always ask her out on a date.

aransom

I was actually thinking about that. In fact a friend of mine sarcastically makes jokes to both of us that we're "going to get married" and "will end up together" and "need to go on a date" and stuff like that. He doesn't know that I like her, so it's pretty weird that he was able to do that with the one girl that I happen to like. But she knows that he's joking, in fact she's always really nice about it and laughs and says stuff like "I really think you're embarassing him" or "That's really not necessary."

But still, what were the odds of that happening?

[QUOTE="Tigerman950"]

There's this girl at my school that I've known for nearly 10 years, and that I've been close friends with for a very long time. Though we're friends, I've sometimes found it rather hard to talk to or get close to her since she's practically in the popular crowd. If I didn't know her at all, I would say that she's totally out of my league. That may somewhat be the case now but the fact that she and I are friends may be an asset for me, or so I'd like to think.

I'd just like to know, what advice do you guys have for me? What should I do, and what shouldn't I? Since she and I are already friends, I don't have to worry about the basic step (approaching her and talking to her for the first time, getting to know her). I just want to know what to do and what not to since, unlike my other friends who are girls, I actually like her.

Would it be weird for me to wait for her at the end of class so I could walk with her, or would that be weird and cause her to get suspicious? This shouldn't be hard for me, since she is usually one of the last ones to leave the classroom. But I need advice, I really want to know what to do since I really have no experience with this stuff. I've never had a girlfriend or a date or anything like that, which may explain why I'm asking all of you for advice. I don't really know what to do to make things move forward at this point, so I would really appreciate some help.

kevin1gamer

When the two of you are alone (not around friends or other people), explain your feelings to her. If she doesn't feel the same way about you, drop the matter, don't pursue her if she says no (I made that mistake once, it ended badly).

[QUOTE="aransom"]

You could always ask her out on a date.

Tigerman950

I was actually thinking about that. In fact a friend of mine sarcastically makes jokes to both of us that we're "going to get married" and "will end up together" and "need to go on a date" and stuff like that. He doesn't know that I like her, so it's pretty weird that he was able to do that with the one girl that I happen to like. But she knows that he's joking, in fact she's always really nice about it and laughs and says stuff like "I really think you're embarassing him" or "That's really not necessary."

But still, what were the odds of that happening?

i agree with what Pirate said. basically after this long you ended up in the friends category, sorry but if she's not interested in you now theres a pretty good chance that she won't change her mind. theres only 1 real way to MAYBE have a chance with her but it involves playin' "tha game" and it basically goes something like this :

1) slowly remove yourself from her, hang out with her less, become more involved with things other than her outside of school/work (not "stop talking to her and ignore her and be a jerk to her") make sure you keep in contact with her though
2) start hanging around other chicks, lots of them, make sure she sees this from time to time
3) next time she says "hey would you like to ______" be nice and say "actually i got plans with ________ we'll definitely get together later" if you have to make this up and not be honest about it, it's ok but i suggest actually going out and doing something during this time period (its a mental thing)

so basically be less clingy, make sure she knows shes not the center of your universe and a very very very subtle hint of "you're a luxury, not a necessity" (this makes her want to become a necessity and not a luxury) you need to have an air of "i'm single and i'm gonna go out and meet some cool chicks" hopefully this gets her jealous (which is what we're aiming for, not single white female jealous, but just enough to make sure she realizes what shes missing)

Listen I'm not going to tell her how I feel, at least not right now. I just want to get closer to her, and want to know what it is I shouldn't do. For instance, would it be awkward for me to wait for at the end of class to walk with her, or would that be too weird or suspicious? Should I ask her out, because that wouldn't really be a huge step if all I'm doing is asking her to see a movie or something.

And to others who have posted, I'm pretty sure she doesn't have feelings for me. I don't think I'm that attractive or charming, whilst she is beautiful and has a sweet and gentle personality. I do try to be a nice guy and make people laugh, but I really don't think that quite does it for someone you're into.

From my experience I think you should forget about her, but things like this are hard to predict. There is a chance revealing feelings like that may ruin such a long friendship.

Listen I'm not going to tell her how I feel, at least not right now. I just want to get closer to her, and want to know what it is I shouldn't do. For instance, would it be awkward for me to wait for at the end of class to walk with her, or would that be too weird or suspicious? Should I ask her out, because that wouldn't really be a huge step if all I'm doing is asking her to see a movie or something.

And to others who have posted, I'm pretty sure she doesn't have feelings for me. I don't think I'm that attractive or charming, whilst she is beautiful and has a sweet and gentle personality. I do try to be a nice guy and make people laugh, but I really don't think that quite does it for someone you're into.

Tigerman950

Listen I'm not going to tell her how I feel, at least not right now. I just want to get closer to her, and want to know what it is I shouldn't do. For instance, would it be awkward for me to wait for at the end of class to walk with her, or would that be too weird or suspicious? Should I ask her out, because that wouldn't really be a huge step if all I'm doing is asking her to see a movie or something.

And to others who have posted, I'm pretty sure she doesn't have feelings for me. I don't think I'm that attractive or charming, whilst she is beautiful and has a sweet and gentle personality. I do try to be a nice guy and make people laugh, but I really don't think that quite does it for someone you're into.

Tigerman950

[QUOTE="Tigerman950"]

Listen I'm not going to tell her how I feel, at least not right now. I just want to get closer to her, and want to know what it is I shouldn't do. For instance, would it be awkward for me to wait for at the end of class to walk with her, or would that be too weird or suspicious? Should I ask her out, because that wouldn't really be a huge step if all I'm doing is asking her to see a movie or something.

And to others who have posted, I'm pretty sure she doesn't have feelings for me. I don't think I'm that attractive or charming, whilst she is beautiful and has a sweet and gentle personality. I do try to be a nice guy and make people laugh, but I really don't think that quite does it for someone you're into.

Pirate700

Not often but I should. Would it be weird if I asked of she wanted to? Not as a date or anything, but as friends, since others will probably come along too.

^ after 10 years now is probably not the time to ask her out. if you're not hanging out with her outside of class after all this time you're probably not going to be. it doesn't hurt to ask if she wants to go do something but honestly if i even got a single "im busy/no thanks/maybe next time" i wouldn't ever bother again. thing is i went through what the TS is going through, i've gone through it a couple times. enough to know that once you're "a good friend" that's all you're going to be unless she gets some kind of epiphany (most women don't, after all this time she probably sees you as a good guy and thats not who she wants)

Not often but I should. Would it be weird if I asked of she wanted to? Not as a date or anything, but as friends, since others will probably come along too.

Tigerman950

Well if she doesn't have feelings for me now (which is probably the case) do you think that can change later on? If I maybe started talking to her more often and hanging out with her outside of school and walking with her do you think eventually I could win her over? That's pretty much the advice I'm looking for.

It may not be best to ask a sea of gamers, lol.... jk.

But seriously, as the others already stated, you should know if she's into you. If you really, REALLY like her, then tell her how you feel. If she doesn't feel the same, don't be embarrassed.. things happen. The only problem with her not liking you the same way is that it will bring awkwardness into your friendship.

It may not be best to ask a sea of gamers, lol.... jk.

But seriously, as the others already stated, you should know if she's into you. If you really, REALLY like her, then tell her how you feel. If she doesn't feel the same, don't be embarrassed.. things happen. The only problem with her not liking you the same way is that it will bring awkwardness into your friendship.

rawr_xd

Also, I have been with my fiance for five years now, and I was best friends with her since 4th grade. Similar situation to you, and I asked her on a date in 11th grade, ever since we have been dating.

Well if she doesn't have feelings for me now (which is probably the case) do you think that can change later on? If I maybe started talking to her more often and hanging out with her outside of school and walking with her do you think eventually I could win her over? That's pretty much the advice I'm looking for.

Tigerman950

[QUOTE="Pirate700"]

[QUOTE="Tigerman950"]

Listen I'm not going to tell her how I feel, at least not right now. I just want to get closer to her, and want to know what it is I shouldn't do. For instance, would it be awkward for me to wait for at the end of class to walk with her, or would that be too weird or suspicious? Should I ask her out, because that wouldn't really be a huge step if all I'm doing is asking her to see a movie or something.

And to others who have posted, I'm pretty sure she doesn't have feelings for me. I don't think I'm that attractive or charming, whilst she is beautiful and has a sweet and gentle personality. I do try to be a nice guy and make people laugh, but I really don't think that quite does it for someone you're into.

Tigerman950

Not often but I should. Would it be weird if I asked of she wanted to? Not as a date or anything, but as friends, since others will probably come along too.

When you two are alone just explain your feelings to her. Say that you really value your friendship and no matter what you wish to remain friends, because it is possible. If you don't get a straight-out no, just ask if you think that there is even a possibility that in the future you and her could end up in a relationship. Also, do it in a casual environment where you both feel comfortable.

Believe me, the sooner you do it the better. Who knows, you could find out that she feels the same way about you

daqua_99

[QUOTE="daqua_99"]

When you two are alone just explain your feelings to her. Say that you really value your friendship and no matter what you wish to remain friends, because it is possible. If you don't get a straight-out no, just ask if you think that there is even a possibility that in the future you and her could end up in a relationship. Also, do it in a casual environment where you both feel comfortable.

Believe me, the sooner you do it the better. Who knows, you could find out that she feels the same way about you

GodofBigMacs

do you know how many similar posts there are about this? but anyways just tell her and ask her if she feels the same, what does it matter if she says no, what do you have to lose? if she says no though dont push it because it will end with the two of you not being friends again.

[QUOTE="daqua_99"]

When you two are alone just explain your feelings to her. Say that you really value your friendship and no matter what you wish to remain friends, because it is possible. If you don't get a straight-out no, just ask if you think that there is even a possibility that in the future you and her could end up in a relationship. Also, do it in a casual environment where you both feel comfortable.

Believe me, the sooner you do it the better. Who knows, you could find out that she feels the same way about you

GodofBigMacs

It might be awkward for a couple of weeks or so, but after that things will just get back to normal. It actually helps the friendship if you do it properly.

I've always 'liked' one of my best friends. We started off dating but then moved to being friends. I always felt a little awkward around her because I did have those suppressed feelings. On Sunday night we were talking over MSN and I told her that I still liked her. She answered that she did like me when we were dating (which I didn't think she did) and that she wants to take it slow and just see how she feels about me. The next day we went out and we had a great time just talking freely because there was nothing separating us ... nothing hidden ... it was great.

[QUOTE="rawr_xd"]

It may not be best to ask a sea of gamers, lol.... jk.

But seriously, as the others already stated, you should know if she's into you. If you really, REALLY like her, then tell her how you feel. If she doesn't feel the same, don't be embarrassed.. things happen. The only problem with her not liking you the same way is that it will bring awkwardness into your friendship.

rawr_xd

Also, I have been with my fiance for five years now, and I was best friends with her since 4th grade. Similar situation to you, and I asked her on a date in 11th grade, ever since we have been dating.

consider yourself the exception that proves the rule.

Well if she doesn't have feelings for me now (which is probably the case) do you think that can change later on? If I maybe started talking to her more often and hanging out with her outside of school and walking with her do you think eventually I could win her over? That's pretty much the advice I'm looking for.

Tigerman950

Lombardi Slap?

Seriously, Pirate has some good advice here. Listen to the man.

All I want to do is get close to her. Maybe if I hang out with or talk to her more she might find interest me. That's my plan as of right now.