The coolest toys ever wage war on dull robot games,but fail to transform an enjoyable arcade blast into Prime Property..
The point is, we all need limits. Highways have speed restrictions. Sentences have full stops. This review ends in 1097 words. Imagine how you'd feel. Lost? Frustrated? Intrigued? Or in other words, exactly like you do in the most annoying bit in Atari's 80% thrilling, 20% maddening Transformers.
In some levels, you're going to get lost. Not just momentarily muddled, like when you're driving down a sidestreet in GTA:Vice City, but well and truly daunted,like the first time you tramped the Hyrule plains in N64's Legend of Zelda: The Ocarina of Time. Mercifully,the game's clever enough to hint at your next move, but never kind enough to flash a giant arrow and point. For every time you delightedly stumble onto the mountain path,noticing a subtle difference in gradient and underfoot shade, you'll be fumbling around in featureless ravines, struggling to get your bearings while being bombarded- for with lasers from airborne robots.
You'd be forgiven for thinking the level will never end.
Why? This game is huuuge. Not in terms of the number of levels, but the sheer scale of each environment. It's like unfurling a giant atlas and plonking a tiny ant in the middle. In levels like the Deep Amazon, you can stand atop mountain and see for virtual miles. It's staggering. Better yet, if you can see a distant object, you can reach it. On foot,by car, or by using glider wings like some preposterous robotic flying machine...but more of that later.
The graphics are stunning. Remember the second level of Halo? Look up to see distant mountain ranges flanked by hulking dropships, or look down to see individual mottled blades of grass. In terms of ambition, no other PS2 game comes close. Sunbeams spray through leafy canopies,water gurgles with icy translucency, and robots explode into hailstorms of chunky Lego.
When you zoom in on the sweeping landscapes, the graphics don't pixellate , but soak up the resolution in crispy detail. If you're not familiar with the Transformers-say you've recently moved from Congo or been blessed with the attention span of a five-year-old-then there are three things you need to know: 1) The toys were launched in the '80s, remarkable for being kick-ass robots that transformed into cool objects such as sport cars,jet fighters and, er, microscopes; 2) The toys were rubbish,taking 10 minutes to transform and snapping at a whisper of physical contact; 3) The comics were brilliant,exploring complex human emotions through medium of explosions and intergalactic combat. How do you combine these elements into a video game?
Success: Developer Melbourne House has ditched the turgid mech-game template-sloe,strategic and daunting, like Armored Core 3- for an arcade blaster with the immediacy of Medal of Honor. Depth is provided by more than 40 Mini-Con power-ups-little robot men who acts as weapons,shields or wings-who can be combined to varying effect. The transformers feel realistically 'heavy' skidding to a halt through clumsy momentum and delivering shattering melee blows. The pad clonks and buzzes with every footsteps, creating a genuine sensation of controlling a 10-foot lump o' metal.
Failure: The robots feel like 10 foot lumps o' metal, and some situations require a lighter touch than an astronauts fart. In the Antarctic, you'll be leaping between platforms with the surface area of an ice cube. In the Amazon, you'll be edging along crumbly mountaintop paths above 60 foot ravines, In the Mid Atlantic, you'll be walking- or driving-along the seabed, looking for a slightly different-colored sections where you won't sink, and jumping onto irregular-shaped rockfaces looking for a nook or cranny that won't send you skidding back like Johhny Vegas in polished clogs. And that's when you're not balancing on triangular mountain tips, preparing to glide-yes, glide like Super Mario-over 100 foot swathes of deadly ocean.
but this seems like an ill-considered-naym ill-designed-attempt to avert the linearity of combat. At times, it works brilliantly,-when you're speeding along as a car and transform just before you reach a ravine, propelling clean over the gap-but not when, say,you're trying to jump out of an icy canyon, slipping on the edge of knee-high platforms, or gliding clumsily onto the rockface with edges like a cornetto and slamming into a crumpled heap.
But, and this is the real transformation... at its frenetic height, Atari's robot war is dazzling. Tearing down a mountainside as an articulated truck, you can bash into a pack of foes, sending 'em scattering like skittles. Or steam into the crowd, transform in mid-air (just tap up button for the iconic 'wach, kerr,ker,ker' sound) then spin around and nail the remaining 'bots with heat-seeking missiles. Words can't do it justice. Like Devil May Cry, the joy is the fluidity and intensity of the action. You could pinpoint the synergy of sound,visuals and Dual Shock feedback, but - hey you just feel cool.
Boss battles are incredible. Robot-turned-jet-fighter Starscream cackles maniacally before launching skywards and peppering your hapless 'bot with missiles. The screen pans out majestically and,suddenly, the focus has shifted from frantic close-range combat to long-distance sniping, juxtaposed with periods of frantic driving along the open plains.
One boss, Tidal Wave, takes up an entire screen -over 300 ft tall- after transforming from an aircraft carrier. On PS2,there's nothing to touch it. Fans of the comics will be delighted(ish), with cameos from Cyclonus, Galvatron, and the planet-sized Unicron.
Transformers is hard. Dive in cach-handed, and you'll be reverse-engineered with a shower of lasers. Even standard foes need to be approached with strategic trepidation. Zoom in, pick off. Charge in,zip out. Tour choice of Mini-Cons is essential to your strategy. Do you creep in stealth camouflage and sniper rifle? Or blast through enhanced melee attacks and flashbang rockets? Either way, when you effortlessly dispatch a gang of 'bots-body cavalcading around your spotless paintwork- you'll flush with pride.
It's Max Payne of mech, lubricating frenetic combat with the 'Gotta catch 'em all' lure of the Mini-Cons. Heck, you can be Optimus Prime. Part 18-wheeler , part Steel Battallion, he's like the Swiss Army knife of 80's toys. So, a surprisingly good game,then but with a few months' more development, some intriguing puzzles perhaps, more playable characters (where's Sideswipe? Or, er, Bumblebee?), a split-screen mode, and greater precision in your interaction, this could've been a classic. But,hey everyone's got to stop somewhere, righ...oh, crap.