I've never known a grandmother to recommend masturbation to their grand children for any reason.

I don't always wear cologne, but when I do I prefer Grey Flannel eau de toilette. A light application.

You've already decided you're not going to do anything, and cited every good reason you shouldn't but you're still confused?

Apparently the guy had a knife. Generally when people come at law enforcement with a knife they get shot.

A tornado is more than capable of sucking you in from 40 feet away.

lol commies.

The black version? Maybe.

I'm sure expanding your vocabulary and having a good sense of humor would be helpful.

Now we know stuff.

Eh, I think you might be better off with a blow up doll.