I simply carry a large wad of twenties with me at all times, and if anybody attempts to usurp my Shotgun position I merely slap them with the wad and declare that only the rich sit in the front.

It's a harsh lesson on how the world really works.

Most of the time: Diet Coke.

When I'm wearing a suit and feeling fancy: Amaretto liquor with cranberry juice.

When I'm sitting in the sun, watching the passing bees and thinking "Screw you, bee. Don't you land near me. If you land near me I'll wreck you.": Kronenberg Mixed Fruit Cider.

Goddamned bees -_-

Marathon chocolate bars.

Get it? Runs?

Thank you, I'm here all night. Tip your waitresses over - their heels make it really easy.

Originally, love was the emotion that one felt when browsing a market in 400 B.C., felt at the exact moment one found a gourd that would look wonderful on your windowsill / hole in the wall.

Then, of course, marketing got hold of it, asked some poets to write sonnets about it, and suddenly it's been re-branded as the special connection one feels to a man/woman/llama.

I think the biggest problem with being a vet in OT is the lack of animals. Business would be SLOW.

I agree, I don't think Incest should be such a big deal. I mean, Leonardo Di Caprio was pretty good in it, as was Ellen Page, but the ending was weak and the plot too convoluted to be really enjoyable.

I once walked up to a woman at a bar.

Our eyes met.

I smiled at her. She smiled back.

And I said:

"ROFLCOPTER, noob! IN BEFORE THE LOCK!"

And I ran before the burly bouncers moderated me.

I am not just an OT vet. I am, like, your GOD, or something.

Sega is history's greatest monster!

The reboot of Sonic The Hedgehog (the one with the Princess). The city-hubs where you have to run around talking to people and collecting rings were bad enough, but your only reward for completing them were poorly designed levels aimed at killing Sonic's speed while you tried to look around the level to see where you were meant to go next.

For that matter, for all the praise Sonic Colours received I absolutely hated the parts where you were supposed to slide under walls. It was a needless reaction test that slowed your progress to punish you for your lack of 'skill'.

Oh, but the Top Gear Test Track challenge on Gran Turismo 5 really takes the cake. By the time I'd completed it I'd lost most of my interest in the game.

I believe it's spelt "soup", noobcuts.