The worst sports game I've ever played. Not just on the NES, but on every other platform imaginable.

User Rating: 3 | Nekketsu Koukou Dodgeball-bu Soccer-hen NES
I was hunting around thrift stores one day, and I came across this game. for 5 dollars, I thought: "Why not, I'll buy any NES game I can find."
But now that I've played it, I think your money would be better spent to invest in your own crap.
Now, To begin with, this looks like your average sports game on Nintendo.
You pick your team, Pick your opponent's team, and you're off.
But, No. Not with this piece of dump.
First, You go to a position select screen. You have to select which players play in what position.
But with the horrible A.I that the game has, It really doesn't matter where you put your players.
To put it bluntly, that's a pain in the ass. I just want to get out on the field and play some soccer.
Next, you have to select your strategies.
It looks something like this:

Offensive strategy?
-Pass the ball
-Use dribble


Should the G.K join in?
-Yes
-No

Should your team-mates shoot?
-Yes, frequently
-Sometimes
-No, not at all

Your defensive strategy?
-Try to tackle
-Mark the opponent

Now, again, this is a pain in the ass. Why do I have to do this? I feel like I'm taking an 8-bit survey!
And also, Take another look at the defensive and offensive strategies.
One of the defensive strategies is "Try to tackle".
Uh....."Try to tackle"?
Call me old-fashioned, but Isn't tackling more of an offensive strategy?
And the offensive strategies are "Pass the ball" and "Use Dribble"!
Now, aren't those anything BUT offensive strategies?!
What happened here? Did they swap the options by accident?
No.....Such an obvious mistake like that must have been intentional.
So anyway, once you're done picking your positions and strategies, you get to play the game, and your first reaction is "Oh my god, I get to play?'
And once you start playing, And I don't think It's just me who noticed this, but the soccer player's sprites are the same of those used in 'River City ransom", a Double Dragon-style fighting game also released on the NES.
Now, I know that The games both came from the same developer, but did they have to recycle sprites from a fighting game and put them into a Soccer game?

Maybe Kung Lao will be a goalie in FIFA '11.

Well, You press A, and the game is on.
Now, whoa, why is the camera flying everywhere? Where the hell is my player?
Well, The camera always follows the ball. And since the players kick the ball all over the place, Get used to sudden jerks, twists, and snaps in the camera.
Now, you're indicated by a little white dot on the mini-map.
The only purpose of this Mini-map is to show you where you are. Because you won't see your own player 75% of the time, since you're constantly trying to catch up to the damn camera, This "Mini-map" is absolutely essential.
But if this game was actually half-decent, you wouldn't need this stupid crap!
And I know I said earlier that the A.I is awful, but let me go into greater detail.

When the opposing team is running down the field towards my goal, My offensive player was running alongside him.
First, aren't the offensive players supposed to stay up front to carry the ball up to the opponents goal, not run into the defensive zone?
And as if that's not enough, My offense player, who is now in the defense zone, wasn't doing jack.
He was just running alongside the offense player from the other team.
It looks like they're jogging buddies!
I mean, come on! Get the damn ball!!
You might as well replace the players with decapitated chickens.
In conclusion, The are a couple things which prevent this game from being flushed down my toilet.
1-The game does have some catchy 8-bit music, and I actually kind of like it.
2- When players get tackled, they do these hilarious facial expressions which remind me of a goose.
3- The game has 4-player support, so you can play with 3 friends if you....
Wait, that's not good! That means 3 more people may have to suffer!

Now I understand why this game was in a thrift shop.

Mamagod