34 Random Avengers: Infinity War Thoughts Ahead Of Endgame
By Chris E. Hayner on
Did you know it's been nearly a year since Avengers: Infinity War hit theaters, crushing all of our spirits as we watched our favorite superheroes turn to dust? Now, 11 months later, we are ready to see the conclusion of that particular story in Avengers: Endgame, which will hopefully bring them all back to life and allow them to live happily ever after.
Ahead of that movie's release, though, I went back and watched Infinity War through a new lens. Now I know how the movie plays out, so I was able to pay attention to details--all of them. In viewing, a number of things occured to me, some of which I've been wondering since my first time watching a year ago, and some that only popped up in my brain now.
So follow along as I take you on a tour of my brain while watching Avengers: Infinity War a year removed from its release. From the feasibility of Tony Stark's nanotech to the details on space farming, here's everything I wondered about on my latest rewatch, while preparing to see Endgame. For an even deeper dive into the Avengers, make sure to take a look at what we've learned about the team and its unofficial leader Nick Fury, thanks to Captain Marvel.
1. Why is Thanos so good at boxing?
Thanos is an intergalactic monster that's accumulating the power of a god. Yet, he also has a really good boxing form. Where did he take boxing lessons? When will we get the MCU Fight Club movie that shows his training in an underground gym?
2. Hulk is a terrible fighter, honestly.
Hulk is the anti-Thanos. There's no precision or thought behind anything he does. It's just smashing, which works until he meets someone who knows a thing or two about the sweet science of fighting.
3. Heimdall should have used the Bifrost to also save Thor or Loki.
I get plot and all of that, but why didn't Heimdall use the Bifrost to get Thor off of that ship and beamed to Earth? I love Hulk too, but this is a missed opportunity. After all, who better to equip Earth for fighting Thanos than someone who knows him well?
4. Why does Dr. Strange strike that super weird pose?
Alright Stephen, calm down with the hero poses. Nobody braces for impact like that.
5. Why does the Bifrost drop Hulk in Dr. Strange's living room?
Certainly, there has to be somewhere to drop Hulk besides a stranger's house, right? What if the Bifrost had zapped him to Tony Stark, Steve Rogers, or literally anyone else on Earth Bruce Banner actually knew?
6. Tony and Bruce don't seem all that impressed that magic exists.
Sure, they hang out with Thor and see all kinds of crazy stuff going on in space. Magic is a whole other ballgame, though. How does magic on Earth not seem like a big deal? I'd be freaking out.
7. Peter Parker sticking to the side of a school bus on a bridge isn't very covert.
Yeah, he's a teenager. But Peter Parker needs to get better at hiding his secret identity.
8. Are Tony Stark's sunglasses also nanotech? Because they disappear into his hand.
Where do they go? Are they nanotech and simply become part of his suit or does Tony have magical powers, which would explain why magic isn't a big deal to him?
9. How does Tony get cell phone reception in space?
The moment an airplane leaves the ground, my cell signal becomes useless. Regardless of his advanced tech, I refuse to believe Tony has bars in space.
10. Kevin Bacon should be an Avenger.
I'm with Mantis; Kevin Bacon is one of Earth's mightiest heroes.
11. Remember when Wanda was Russian?
Her accent used to be so thick--in Age of Ultron--and now it simply doesn't exist. And don't come at me with the excuse that she's in hiding, so she dropped it. She's not in hiding in her fancy hotel room with Vision.
12. If Vision can take on the appearance of anyone, why Paul Bettany?
Honestly, Vision can make himself look like anyone. Why did he choose Paul Bettany? Which leads to an even bigger question...
13. Does the actor Paul Bettany exist in the MCU?
Does Paul Bettany exist in this world? If so, did Tony model the voice of JARVIS after him? Did someone show Vision the movie A Beautiful Mind, and he simply became attached to Bettany's character? I have many questions.
14. Why are the Children of Thanos stronger than an energy blast from an Infinity Stone?
Aren't Infinity Stones the most powerful gems in the universe or some such thing? In theory, a blast from one should rip a child in Thanos in half, no? Instead, they just simply deflect it. Maybe Vision just has the lame duck stone?
15. Does the beard make Captain America more powerful?
The internet loves Cap's beard, and I get it. But does it actually make him a more formidable opponent? After all, he doesn't even have his shield, and he still lays the beatings down.
16. How did Falcon get his robot wings back after going to prison?
Remember at the end of Civil War when Falcon went to jail, then got sprung by Cap? Now he and the rest of the fugitive Avengers are on the run. When did he get his wings back, though? Cap didn't get his shield. Are those even the same wings? What's going on here?
17. Maybe Cap and his crew should have killed the Children of Thanos.
We all like to point out how much Peter Quill sucks for punching Thanos later in the movie, but there are multiple times his plan could have been stopped or screwed up. Maybe they should have killed his children when they had the chance.
18. Does Quill think Thanos will be insulted when he calls him Grimace?
I'm willing to bet Thanos has no idea who Ronald McDonald is, let alone Grimace. Sure, it's a sick burn I laughed at. But to Thanos, it's just a silly human speaking gibberish.
19. Does being turned to crumbling rock or ribbons hurt?
It sure looks like it hurts when Thanos uses the reality stone to mess with Drax and Mantis. Hopefully, they didn't feel too much.
20. So is the Collector dead?
I hope not. Benicio del Toro rules.
21. Why doesn't Bruce change out of his ratty sweater?
With everything going on, you'd think Bruce would throw on some government-issued sweats or something.
22. Why does house arrest matter when it's the end of the world?
It's a very convenient way to keep Ant-Man and Hawkeye out of the picture, but some things seem bigger than a government's slap on the wrist.
23. How does Wakanda not have a Starbucks yet?
24. Black Panther promised Cap a shield. Why did he only get fancy gloves?
Cap is trained to fight with a shield, not gauntlets. Get it together, T'Challa.
25. Why do stars run like engines in the MCU?
When Thor, Groot, and Rocket land on Nidavellir, a star, it's turned off like an engine. That leaves Thor to restart it. I'm not an astronomer and would never classify myself an expert in stars. I don't think this is how they work, though. It's worth noting the mechanical rings around it are home to Dwarves in the MCU, but that still leaves me confused about stars.
26. Can't Thor's fancy new hammer just kill all of these guys?
When Thor arrives on Earth, his new hammer takes out a bunch of gross monsters. Why not let it keep going until they're all dead, though?
27. Peter Quill sucks.
Yeah, we all know it by this point. Quill let his emotions get the best of him and, in the process, destroyed the universe. Good job, Peter. Don't worry, you're not the only one, though.
28. Can't they just download Vision into a computer and destroy the stone?
Sure, it'll take a few hard drives. But can't Vision's consciousness be downloaded into a computer? They spend to much time trying to disconnect him from the Infinity Stone, but never think to just remove him from his body--which can be rebuilt. Maybe even rebuild it to look more like Paul Bettany.
29. Why does Vision make this weird face?
This face has haunted me since the first time I saw Infinity War. I noticed it every single time and I'll never get over it.
30. Why do people's clothes get dusted too?
If people are getting turned to dust, shouldn't there just be piles of clothing everywhere? Why, instead, are their clothes and accessories disappeared with them?
31. Is the world covered in dust now? Are there dust storms?
And what about residual dust? With so many people turning to ash, there must surely be piles or it all over the planet. That sounds dirty.
32. Where is Thanos' space farm?
Where does Thanos go to do his space farming at the end of the movie? It's so peaceful and quiet. Maybe he should have just gone there in the first place. It seems pretty unpopulated, which is something he's clearly into.
33. I wonder what kind of animals he has to use a scarecrow to get rid of...
Turning his armor into a scarecrow is a clever idea. But what the heck is trying to get to his crops? And what are his crops? Is Thanos growing corn?
34. How does Nick Fury not know what's going on already?
He's Nick Fury. He knows everything. I'm disappointed in him for dropping this ball on this one.