8 things you need to know (no 56k)

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jethrovegas

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#1 jethrovegas
Member since 2007 • 5103 Posts

8 THINGS YOU NEED TO KNOW

8ball

1. GRAND THEFT AUTO IV LOOKS BETTER THAN YOU

gtaiv

Look guys, I know most of you (not counting the Sheep, obviously) are really used to seeing ultra high quality graphics that blow the lid off of everything else out there. I mean, the Cows have Uncharted and Heavenly Sword, The Lemmings have GeoW and Bioshock, the Hermits have Crysis and a ton of other games, and all of us have Call of Duty 4 (not counting the Sheep, obviously).

Having said that, does every game need to push the graphical bar further in order for us to say that it looks good? Because I have been hearing alot of criticism with regard to GTA IV's graphics, when, to me at least, the game looks awesome. There's alof detail applied to textures, there's great lighting and special effects, and the main character models look pretty slick. And remember: It's an open world game. It's not going to look as good as Gears. I think SW as a whole needs to realize that, sit back an relax, and just bask in the multi-plat glory that will be GTA IV (not counting the Sheep, obviously).

2. DUKE NUKEM 3D FOR XBLA? HELLZ TO THE YEAH!

dn

Videogamer.com has some story up about Duke Nukem 3D going to XBLA. That would be ****ing awesome! Somehow though, I feel as if this is just a smoke screen to distract me and other DN fans from the sad reality that Duke Nukem Forever has been in development since the time when Michael Jackson was still black.

3. SUPER SMASH BROS BRAWL: DELAYED AGAIN

tehsuck

Super Smash Brothers Brawl has been delayed again, this time until March 9th. This makes me wonder how people who exclusively own a Wii manage to survive. Whilst Hermits, Lemmings, and yes, even Cows, constantly have a current of solid and many times amazing games arriving for their systems, the Sheep seem content to sort of meander around for a few months, following the pieces of bait that are Nintendo's flagship titles.

Sure, when they finally arrive they can be awesome. Look at Twilight Princess and SMG. But my question to the Sheep is this:

In those long months between quality games on the Wii, what is it that you do? Do you replay RE4 Wii for the 4th time? Do you look for every poe in Twilight Princess? Do you pretend that Sonic and the Secret Rings doesn't suck? Just curious.

4. NO DENNIS DYACK, I DO NOT TRUST YOU

th

Congratulations Dennis Dyack, you made Eternal Darkness. But listen up DD, I have something to tell you about Too Human:

Your history with ED does not mean I trust you to make TH a good game, do you understand me DD?

Seriously, don't even think ED will gain a sympathy vote in my mind, DD. You still have to do a good job on TH. Rise to it. Make a stand. Be firm about it. I know it's difficult, but don't let your past with ED go to your head. This deal is only going to get harder from here on in.

5. FABLE 2 IS GOING TO BE REALLY CONTROVERSIAL

sss

Think about it man: This game has dogs, women, and impregnation. I can see the Kevin McCollough headline now:

FABLE 2 FEATURES DOGS IMPREGNATING WOMEN: YOUR CHILDREN CAN NOW ENGAGE IN BEASTIALITY ON THEIR SEXBOXES!!!

Peter Molyneux better get his ill-informed d-bag journalist shield ready...

6. THEY SHOULD TOTALLY MAKE A KILLDOZER GAME

sss

Woudn't that kick ass? It could be a free roaming sandbox game set in Maui and would use CryEngine 2. The basic idea of the game would be to drive around Maui and Killdoze stuff. That would be GOTY 2008 if someone would just make it...

7. WESLEY SNIPES TO WORK WITH TEAM ICO?

sss

I heard a rumour from a source that I cannot disclose that Wesley Snipes may be involved in the creation of some sort of vampire themed video game working with Team ICO. Please note that this is pretty much uncomfirmed, and is third hand information, but it certainly seems interesting and somewhat plausible given his involvement with vampires in the Blade movies. My source seemed to think that Snipes would be in some sort of a directorial position rather than a voice acting one. Time will tell, but for now just call BS on this, and if it goes down, remember that I called it.

8. SUDA 51 SAYS THAT 3RD PARTY WII GAMES AREN'T SELLING

sss

LINK

All I have to say to that statement by Mr.51 is...

[spoiler] NO ****ING DIP [/spoiler]

9.

sss

There is no nine. Go away, this topic is over.

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xTHExJUICEx

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#2 xTHExJUICEx
Member since 2007 • 3126 Posts
Pretty enjoyable thread...9/10
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Ragashahs

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#3 Ragashahs
Member since 2005 • 8785 Posts

"Your history with ED does not mean I trust you to make TH a good game, do you understand me DD?"

you might wanna be careful next you you use "ED"

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billjakybob

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#4 billjakybob
Member since 2004 • 14574 Posts
not bad i cant actually see some of that coming tru
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jethrovegas

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#5 jethrovegas
Member since 2007 • 5103 Posts

not bad i cant actually see some of that coming tru billjakybob

All of it will come true, guranteed or your money back.

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TalesofRaGnArOk

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#6 TalesofRaGnArOk
Member since 2007 • 3189 Posts
NO, Suda, noooo. No more Heroes will sell here. I promise...I'm buying it
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Shenmue_Jehuty

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#7 Shenmue_Jehuty
Member since 2007 • 5211 Posts
I'm totally there with your number 9
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heretrix

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#8 heretrix
Member since 2004 • 37881 Posts
LOL. Good thread man. I actually had a good chuckle reading that. And Big props on the Denis Dyack stuff. The dude needs to shut up and finish his game. Then talk.
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viva_havarte

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#9 viva_havarte
Member since 2007 • 312 Posts
LOL. Good thread man. I actually had a good chuckle reading that. And Big props on the Denis Dyack stuff. The dude needs to shut up and finish his game. Then talk.heretrix
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Heil68

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#10 Heil68
Member since 2004 • 58502 Posts
Nice thread! Very funny
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astiop

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#11 astiop
Member since 2005 • 3582 Posts
9. Made this thread a 10/10 from an otherwise 6/10
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dkhw

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#12 dkhw
Member since 2006 • 4045 Posts
Good thread. I cant wait for Fable 2 and GTA IV.
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Always-Honest

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#13 Always-Honest
Member since 2007 • 11261 Posts
enjoyable thread. not thrustworthy or newsworthy in any way, but enjoyable none the less.
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jethrovegas

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#14 jethrovegas
Member since 2007 • 5103 Posts

enjoyable thread. not thrustworthy or newsworthy in any way, but enjoyable none the less.Always-Honest

Dude whatever, you can trust everything you read in this thread 110%. :|

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Meu2k7

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#15 Meu2k7
Member since 2007 • 11809 Posts
Killdozer wtf :lol: Randomness is awesome.
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jackvegas21

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#16 jackvegas21
Member since 2007 • 3157 Posts
Wesley Snipes is gonna save the industry.
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Unreal_393

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#17 Unreal_393
Member since 2007 • 620 Posts

"FABLE 2 FEATURES DOGS IMPREGNATING WOMEN: YOUR CHILDREN CAN NOW ENGAGE IN BEASTIALITY ON THEIR SEXBOXES!!!"

YEASSS!!!! YEASS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YOU ARE WINNNNNERRR!!!!!!!1!!!!1!!!11!!!!eleven!!!!!!!!!

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General_X

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#18 General_X
Member since 2003 • 9137 Posts

"Your history with ED does not mean I trust you to make TH a good game, do you understand me DD?"

you might wanna be careful next you you use "ED"

Ragashahs
I think that was his intention if you read the rest of it.
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cliff122316

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#19 cliff122316
Member since 2005 • 2333 Posts
a bunch of michael references in there....you two got a thing?
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ICollegeStudent

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#20 ICollegeStudent
Member since 2007 • 655 Posts
:lol: great thread, i laughed a #9.
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locopatho

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#21 locopatho
Member since 2003 • 24062 Posts
"not counting the sheep obviously" pure gold :P
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Saturos3091

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#22 Saturos3091
Member since 2005 • 14938 Posts
Well done thread; although I knew all of them, except for number 9. That one was a bit creepy (special edit?).
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jethrovegas

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#23 jethrovegas
Member since 2007 • 5103 Posts

"not counting the sheep obviously" pure gold :Plocopatho

I thought so.

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clone01

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#24 clone01
Member since 2003 • 28563 Posts

[QUOTE="Always-Honest"]enjoyable thread. not thrustworthy or newsworthy in any way, but enjoyable none the less.jethrovegas

Dude whatever, you can trust everything you read in this thread 110%. :|

i agree with you on the Too Human stuff...i really want that game to be good, but i'm still on the fence about it.

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Snagal123

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#25 Snagal123
Member since 2006 • 3524 Posts
killdozer sounds the bomb, Carmageddon reborn!
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LibertySaint

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#26 LibertySaint
Member since 2007 • 6500 Posts

Pretty enjoyable thread...9/10xTHExJUICEx

yep it was i give it a 9.5/10 so ha! my reviews better :P nnenerrr nnenerrr :P

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LibertySaint

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#27 LibertySaint
Member since 2007 • 6500 Posts

[QUOTE="billjakybob"]not bad i cant actually see some of that coming tru jethrovegas

All of it will come true, guranteed or your money back.

money? ooo, how** much money will i get back? :D

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Jimmybones79

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#28 Jimmybones79
Member since 2004 • 1027 Posts

3/10

you got 2 points for the Jackson pic.

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GunSmith1_basic

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#29 GunSmith1_basic
Member since 2002 • 10548 Posts

lol funny but i dont agree with any of it

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masori

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#30 masori
Member since 2005 • 1680 Posts
lol @ number nine
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glitchgeeman

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#31 glitchgeeman
Member since 2005 • 5638 Posts
Ha, nice thread, even though I really don't agree with some of it. #9 makes up for the SSBB and Suda 51 comment though.
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Dr_Zeduto

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#32 Dr_Zeduto
Member since 2006 • 81 Posts
The best thread I've read in System Wars in a while :)
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jethrovegas

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#33 jethrovegas
Member since 2007 • 5103 Posts

Ha, nice thread, even though I really don't agree with some of it. #9 makes up for the SSBB and Suda 51 comment though.glitchgeeman

Hey man, Suda 51 is completely correct in his appraisal of the current Wii situation.

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Sgt_Crow

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#34 Sgt_Crow
Member since 2004 • 6099 Posts
Nice and funny read, although I sense a bit of a bias in some points.
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yellowandmushy

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#35 yellowandmushy
Member since 2006 • 2095 Posts
Too Human looks great.
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shoeman12

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#36 shoeman12
Member since 2005 • 8744 Posts
third party wii games don't sell? how come there are 6 third party million sellers on the wii?
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jethrovegas

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#37 jethrovegas
Member since 2007 • 5103 Posts

Nice and funny read, although I sense a bit of a bias in some points.Sgt_Crow

Really? That's interesting, because I felt as though I gave every point that had to do with any specific system a very fair and carefully rational analysis.

Any "bias" you detect in my post is, in essence, your own bias making itself readily apparent.

For instance, this post, in contrast to several of my previous posts, levels several critcisms at Nintendo, and at Nintendo's software library.

All of these criticisms are completely fair and honest, and were you not biased in favor of Nintendo, you would, more than likely, see that quite clearly.