Should i talk to my brother?

Long story short....about six years ago there was a huge dispute between my mom my brother and his wife. Some things happened and they ended up puting my mom in extreme debt that was hard for her to come out of and my mom has disowned my brother since. About a week ago he came to my door but my mom refused to open the door or leave any indication that we are home at all. After a while they left but they left a note behind saying sorry and it has my brothers cell number in it. Now my mom has told me straight up if i ever talk to him again she will kick me out. He has never done anything wrong to me and he is my brother...so lately ive been wanting to see him again but scared about what would happen if my mom finds out. Idk if OT could help much in this situation but im desperate for some advice...

Long story short....about six years ago there was a huge dispute between my mom my brother and his wife. Some things happened and they ended up puting my mom in extreme debt that was hard for her to come out of and my mom has disowned my brother since. About a week ago he came to my door but my mom refused to open the door or leave any indication that we are home at all. After a while they left but they left a note behind saying sorry and it has my brothers cell number in it. Now my mom has told me straight up if i ever talk to him again she will kick me out. He has never done anything wrong to me and he is my brother...so lately ive been wanting to see him again but scared about what would happen if my mom finds out. Idk if OT could help much in this situation but im desperate for some advice...

killblade37

Find a way you can talk where your mom won't find out or wait until you're ready to move out. Your brother sounds like a piece of **** if he basically robbed your mom, and people like that don't change.

And yes, by no means, offer him any help.

Yes. I have 4 brothers and there isn't a reason in the world why I would disown them. No matter what happened in the past, he is still the same person you grew up with and have known your whole life. Everyone fraks up, you just have to get past it. Six years is definitely long enough to do so. Your mother should respect your choice and think about hearing your brother out herself. She should at least give hime that.

How old are you?bobaban

Im 17 gonna be 18 though on the 18th

[QUOTE="killblade37"]

Long story short....about six years ago there was a huge dispute between my mom my brother and his wife. Some things happened and they ended up puting my mom in extreme debt that was hard for her to come out of and my mom has disowned my brother since. About a week ago he came to my door but my mom refused to open the door or leave any indication that we are home at all. After a while they left but they left a note behind saying sorry and it has my brothers cell number in it. Now my mom has told me straight up if i ever talk to him again she will kick me out. He has never done anything wrong to me and he is my brother...so lately ive been wanting to see him again but scared about what would happen if my mom finds out. Idk if OT could help much in this situation but im desperate for some advice...

DreamnDayUnite

Well they claim they dont need anything that was also in the letter lol...but i remeber there was another time after that fight they came back to us for help..there 1 month old son died and wanted my mom to pay for the funeral.....my mom did (till this day i dont know why) then they continued not to talk to us or try to after that....Now that i think about it Maybe i shouldent talk to him..lol idk i guess im just confused...

Since I do not know what it is your brother did I do not know what you should do.

I say forget about him, for now.Do you think he will take you in once your mother kicks you out? Based on what he was willing to do in the past I doubt it.

To be safe I wouldn't talk to your brother, he put your mom through a lot of crap.

[QUOTE="DreamnDayUnite"][QUOTE="killblade37"]

Long story short....about six years ago there was a huge dispute between my mom my brother and his wife. Some things happened and they ended up puting my mom in extreme debt that was hard for her to come out of and my mom has disowned my brother since. About a week ago he came to my door but my mom refused to open the door or leave any indication that we are home at all. After a while they left but they left a note behind saying sorry and it has my brothers cell number in it. Now my mom has told me straight up if i ever talk to him again she will kick me out. He has never done anything wrong to me and he is my brother...so lately ive been wanting to see him again but scared about what would happen if my mom finds out. Idk if OT could help much in this situation but im desperate for some advice...

killblade37

Well they claim they dont need anything that was also in the letter lol...but i remeber there was another time after that fight they came back to us for help..there 1 month old son died and wanted my mom to pay for the funeral.....my mom did (till this day i dont know why) then they continued not to talk to us or try to after that....Now that i think about it Maybe i shouldent talk to him..lol idk i guess im just confused...

Man, this is a bad famiy situation... umm...I suggest you talking to your mom first and then work things out.

Based on the info you gave sounds like your bro and his women are losers and only come back for help. I say leave em be.

Basically you have to figure out who your real family is. Is your brother the type that continues to mess up and use everybody to get his way, or is your mom a control freak that likes to dwell on past mistakes?

I'm a little bias against your brother since I've got a friend w/ a brother that would constantly screw over his family. So I can imagine why your mom would disown him like that. Now if your brother isn't a screw up it's probably your mom (which sounds likely given her threat to kick you out if you talk to your brother). If that's the case I'd side w/ my brother and ditch my mom. Things might be well between your mom and you now, but you'll always just be one mistake from being disowned like your brother.

easy sneak out and see him

I would be very suspicious about what he wants.

well, if you nedd to see your brother secretly, so as not to her your mothers feelings. see what he wants and don't let brotherly affection cloud your judgement. i hate your brother's guts to do something like that to his mother and reappear suddenly one day. in my opinion people like this don't change.

[QUOTE="DreamnDayUnite"][QUOTE="killblade37"]

Long story short....about six years ago there was a huge dispute between my mom my brother and his wife. Some things happened and they ended up puting my mom in extreme debt that was hard for her to come out of and my mom has disowned my brother since. About a week ago he came to my door but my mom refused to open the door or leave any indication that we are home at all. After a while they left but they left a note behind saying sorry and it has my brothers cell number in it. Now my mom has told me straight up if i ever talk to him again she will kick me out. He has never done anything wrong to me and he is my brother...so lately ive been wanting to see him again but scared about what would happen if my mom finds out. Idk if OT could help much in this situation but im desperate for some advice...

killblade37

Well they claim they dont need anything that was also in the letter lol...but i remeber there was another time after that fight they came back to us for help..there 1 month old son died and wanted my mom to pay for the funeral.....my mom did (till this day i dont know why) then they continued not to talk to us or try to after that....Now that i think about it Maybe i shouldent talk to him..lol idk i guess im just confused...