Yeah I know this isnt the best place to post stuff like this for actually helpful responses but I like seeing the replies I get from here so here I go.....
So anyway I've been playing baseball since I was like 4 or 5. When I was that young I never really had much thoughs on playing, I just played. My Dad is one of those super sports pro Dads so he kind of made me play. When I was about 7 I figured out that I did not really like playing baseball. I always played in a higher age division and always did really well in little league. I was never excited to play though. I was always pretty good at defense and really good at hitting but honestly in my little league days, I was always scared of getting hit by the pitch lol.
Wait Im getting off topic... So anyway I'd never be excited to play. I could tell my friends were though. If a game got cancelled everyone would be all sad or mad and I'd just be like "Oh, cool we dont have a game tommorow." I never told my dad that I didn't want to play because, well being like 10 he was pretty scary o.O
I do remember me saying I dont like playing baseball when I was like 8 around my parents but I cant remember what happened after. There was only one year I actaully had a lot of fun and that was when I was like 12 or 13. My league sucked at the time and my coach wasnt serious and all of my friends were on the team so it was just a chill year.
Now when I got into highschool I played JV for 2 years as a freshman and sophmore. My school always won league undefeated and sometimes even won CIF in its history so my coaches took it really seriously. We would work really hard and I was still pretty good, I didnt really shine as much as I did in little league. Then I started to think about quitting, but then my dad would have wasted tons of time and money for me to just quit like that. And I wasnt going to quit in the middle of the year or anything, I was going to stop playing after the season. But then I just decided to finish off my JV years. I was honestly okay with that though.
Now, I just started Varsity. Im a Junior and I just really don't want to play anymore. Even boefre tryouts I talked to my mom about it and I know she cares but she pretty easily supported my decision although she was questioning it a little. My dad would be the hard one to convince.... I know I could have a future in baseball. I know I can. Im good enough, I always try my hardest even though I cant force my heart into it. I know I could go pro one day, but I really don't want to live that kind of lifestyle. I dont want the constant traveling and constant baseball games, or the constant attention! And all that money.... What will I do with it anyway? I honestly dont have good enough social skills for that kind of life anyway. I mean I dont have bad social skills but not good.
I imagine myself perfectly happy just living a "normal" life ya know? Just in a regular house with a family and a job yadayadayada. I want to focus on school a lot so I can get at least a higher paying than normal job though. But back to the baseball thing. This year, since im on Varsity, my dad was planning to put me in all of these workout programs and everything like he did with my brother. (My brother got a full ride athletic scholarship btw) Most people who devote all their time and effort into this are passionate about playing baseball, but at this point, im passionate about not playing. Its getting too serious now and I really dont want to waste all of my time working for goals I really dont care about achieving anymore. Like really, before I didnt really want to play much, but I didnt really think much about going to practice everyday after school, but now I just REALLY dont want to do it. Really I always get all depressed 6th period because I know I have to practice 7th... I usually just go to sleep in that class. Its just so much stress. Its even stress for those who want to do it.
So I just talked to my dad about it and he keeps saying things like "Give it a chance" "You're locking yourself out" "You are shutting out an opportunity" "Don't be a quitter" Ok he said more things but Im going to focus on these quotes right now. Give it a chance? Ive been freaking playing baseball my whole life and I never liked it. Baseball doesnt NEED any more chances for me. He says I may change my mind since im at the top level now but I cant even express how wrong this is. Im NOT and I will say again, NOT going to change my mind about this. I have been thinking about it for TOO long. Why the heck would just start liking it now???
You're locking yourself out? Shutting out an opporunity? I dont care how good I am at it. I know I can get alot of opportunities in baseball with scholarships and blahblahblah. But If I dont want to do it than I dont want to do it. Its as simple as that. I might be good at it, but I dont enjoy it at ALL. At these point I detest it.
Dont be a quitter??? Ive been freaking playing through this my whole life, always giving 120%, never liking it. I didnt quit then. I want to stop. The main thing hes saying is since I already started the season I need to finish it. I never wanted to start the season in the first place. Ive been doing something I never wanted to do long enough. Im sick of it, completely.
My dad says things like this build character, doing things you dont want to do.... I dont even know what to say to this. I mean that is right... But this is different.... Is it? I never wanted to do it, I went through 10+ years doing it and he doesnt want me to stop because im a the top highschool level. He said he at least want me to finish this year.... This season just started.... Its going to be a longggggg season. (Well we are practicing now but season doesnt actually start until next semester) I am really against the idea of finishing it. I dont care what people think of me at ALL. I dont want to play. Its as simple as that. He pretty much said I am going to finish because it makes no sense to stop all of a sudden. He knows he cant force me but he keeps telling me to finish. Honestly, either way I dont see myself finishing and you can bet that I wont. There is no tennis team at my school and me and my friends were going to form it, after I quit.... I want to do something purely fun. Tennis has always been fun to me. That is like the perfect thing.... That is something I could have fun being competetive in.... Even though dont want it as a carrer, I just want to do it in highschool for fun. I dont really know how to end this so I will end it here.