So ya, we were at a party and we made a bet to see who would get a girl first. Of course I won, I mean I'm dead sexy. Anyways we went back to his apartment and he was all over this one chick name Laquisha. The girl I was with kept whispering in my ear, "Hey Ethan, I wonder what it would be like if you kissed him." I was like, "Dizamn, Girl! Who you think I be? Gettin' all fruit cup in here" She then told me she would give me $5 if I would kiss him tomorrow morning. At that moment I remembered that I needed to pay Laquisha for having her hang out with him. So I did what any American would do, I took the bet.
That morning, I made up some stuff about how I loved him and all. I grabbed his hand and I said "Thou art most sexy," and I leaned in for the kiss. At first I though he would back away, but he didn't! So our lips locked, and he snuck in a little T-O-N-G-U-E, and I decided to swirl mine in there too, I mean...might as well get my money's worth!
I thought everything was fine, and then he backed up and blasted me a good old fasion sucker punch in my JAW! I was like "Man, Dawg, whats yo' problem, boo? I LOVE YOU! Aint you ever kiss a man before?" He told me that I was a horrible kisser and that's why he punched me. I cried like a mug! And I left, I even forgot my boost mobile in his room, so I never did collect my 5 washingtons.
What should I do guys?
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