I got a my gf pregnant

Avatar image for PanPizza15
PanPizza15

1483

Forum Posts

0

Wiki Points

0

Followers

Reviews: 3

User Lists: 0

#1 PanPizza15
Member since 2006 • 1483 Posts

I just don't know what I'm gonna do or how I can abandon ship

Avatar image for davillain-
DaVillain-

47374

Forum Posts

0

Wiki Points

0

Followers

Reviews: 0

User Lists: 5

#2 DaVillain-  Moderator
Member since 2014 • 47374 Posts

That's what you get for not using condoms lol. Well you could do is:

  1. Man up and take responsibilities or face child support.
  2. Move to Mexico or Cuba, be off the grid
Avatar image for girlusocrazy
GirlUSoCrazy

13896

Forum Posts

0

Wiki Points

0

Followers

Reviews: 3

User Lists: 0

#3 GirlUSoCrazy
Member since 2015 • 13896 Posts

Is this cold feet, or a bad relationship?

Avatar image for mary_issac
mary_issac

6

Forum Posts

0

Wiki Points

0

Followers

Reviews: 0

User Lists: 5

#4 mary_issac
Member since 2021 • 6 Posts

Congrats man! Why sad?

Avatar image for Telekill
Telekill

11335

Forum Posts

0

Wiki Points

0

Followers

Reviews: 4

User Lists: 0

#5 Telekill
Member since 2003 • 11335 Posts

I recommend going with the man up and take responsibility option listed above. If you didn't like the girl enough to have a kid with her, you shouldn't have slept with her. Secondly, if you don't want to be with her anymore, you can still be responsible and be a part of that kid's life... more than just court forced financially.

Avatar image for girlusocrazy
GirlUSoCrazy

13896

Forum Posts

0

Wiki Points

0

Followers

Reviews: 3

User Lists: 0

#6 GirlUSoCrazy
Member since 2015 • 13896 Posts

@Telekill: Good post

Having a kid is a wonderful thing, it will make you a better person

Avatar image for ghost_of_phobos
Ghost_of_Phobos

2441

Forum Posts

0

Wiki Points

0

Followers

Reviews: 1

User Lists: 5

#7 Ghost_of_Phobos
Member since 2020 • 2441 Posts

What about abortion?

Avatar image for girlusocrazy
GirlUSoCrazy

13896

Forum Posts

0

Wiki Points

0

Followers

Reviews: 3

User Lists: 0

#8  Edited By GirlUSoCrazy
Member since 2015 • 13896 Posts

@ghost_of_phobos: What about regret? There should be a lot of consideration before resorting to that, it's something both partners have to live with. But it is fair to mention it as an option, I wonder what TC thinks, it seems like they wrote this and ghosted.

Adoption is also an option, or having family help out with care giving.

Avatar image for ghost_of_phobos
Ghost_of_Phobos

2441

Forum Posts

0

Wiki Points

0

Followers

Reviews: 1

User Lists: 5

#9 Ghost_of_Phobos
Member since 2020 • 2441 Posts

@girlusocrazy: Really depends how early it is, if it's really early and none of the people involved wants to have a child then there's nothing to regret. It's a simple and harmless procedure.

It also depends on personal beliefs of course.

Avatar image for davillain-
DaVillain-

47374

Forum Posts

0

Wiki Points

0

Followers

Reviews: 0

User Lists: 5

#10  Edited By DaVillain-  Moderator
Member since 2014 • 47374 Posts

@ghost_of_phobos said:

@girlusocrazy: Really depends how early it is, if it's really early and none of the people involved wants to have a child then there's nothing to regret. It's a simple and harmless procedure.

It also depends on personal beliefs of course.

Also adding this. It depends where you live if Abortion is legal in certain states but yes, if woman founds out she's pregnant very early on and the baby hasn't started develop, Abortion is harmless to go on from that point. But keep in mind religion can also hander the choice of going through Abortion. If both parties are not into beliefs than Abortion is always an option to go at it. Remember, getting Abortion means you did nothing wrong.

Avatar image for girlusocrazy
GirlUSoCrazy

13896

Forum Posts

0

Wiki Points

0

Followers

Reviews: 3

User Lists: 0

#11  Edited By GirlUSoCrazy
Member since 2015 • 13896 Posts

@ghost_of_phobos: Yeah, it's a personal thing, but it's worth considering if you would feel like it was a missed opportunity in the future and wonder what if you did have the kid...

I'm the type of person that would always wonder "what if", especially now after having a kid. There was a time I put off having a kid for more selfish reasons and the thought of a little hardship, but now I wish I had done it earlier even with those factors.

Of course it would help to know more about the context of TC's decision!

Avatar image for SOedipus
SOedipus

13400

Forum Posts

0

Wiki Points

0

Followers

Reviews: 0

User Lists: 0

#12  Edited By SOedipus  Online
Member since 2006 • 13400 Posts
@davillain- said:

That's what you get for not using condoms lol. Well you could do is:

  1. Man up and take responsibilities or face child support.
  2. Move to Mexico or Cuba, be off the grid

Do it, or you'll regret it later in life. Unless you're a psychopath or something.

Avatar image for kriggy
kriggy

1269

Forum Posts

0

Wiki Points

0

Followers

Reviews: 4

User Lists: 0

#13  Edited By kriggy
Member since 2008 • 1269 Posts

That's what happens dude, unfortunately you made a big oopsie! All you can do now is to take responsibility.

However, for future reference, please repeat after me: "Condoms are cheaper than child support", "Condoms are cheaper than child support", "Condoms are cheaper than child support", "Condoms are cheaper than child support".

Avatar image for ghost_of_phobos
Ghost_of_Phobos

2441

Forum Posts

0

Wiki Points

0

Followers

Reviews: 1

User Lists: 5

#14 Ghost_of_Phobos
Member since 2020 • 2441 Posts

@girlusocrazy: It's really one of those things that each person has to make their own judgement.

I had an abortion (well the girl did) 20 years ago and I have absolutely no regrets. I didn't want a child, she didn't want a child and there was absolutely no interest in having a serious relationship so it made absolutely no sense having a baby just because.

That's my personal experience.

Avatar image for Serraph105
Serraph105

35341

Forum Posts

0

Wiki Points

0

Followers

Reviews: 0

User Lists: 0

#15 Serraph105
Member since 2007 • 35341 Posts

@PanPizza15: being a good father can be very personally fulfilling. I'm not one, so grains of salt, but I do have friends who are and would attest to really enjoying it despite the stress.

You're other options are abortion or adoption, but of course, both of those require the girl's agreement.

Avatar image for girlusocrazy
GirlUSoCrazy

13896

Forum Posts

0

Wiki Points

0

Followers

Reviews: 3

User Lists: 0

#16  Edited By GirlUSoCrazy
Member since 2015 • 13896 Posts

@ghost_of_phobos: Understood, and perfectly valid

Avatar image for mrbojangles25
mrbojangles25

50539

Forum Posts

0

Wiki Points

0

Followers

Reviews: 11

User Lists: 0

#17 mrbojangles25  Online
Member since 2005 • 50539 Posts

@mary_issac said:

Congrats man! Why sad?

  • At the wrong time, a baby can ruin one's life trajectory.
  • Some folks aren't cut out to be parents, or just don't want to have kids.
  • It doesn't fit their life plan.
  • Some folks want kids, just not with their current partner.
  • Some people just plain don't like children *shrug*

I mean, there's tons of reasons to be sad....I think kids are awesome, I love my niece and nephew more than anything in the world, but never in 1000 years would I want any of my own.

I would do everything in my power to convince my partner to get an abortion or talk her into putting the kids up for adoption.

With that said, I am her partner and would stand by her decision and support the kids in the end. Humans make the best of things, that's sort of what we do. I think that's a Loki quote, right?

@PanPizza15 said:

I just don't know what I'm gonna do or how I can abandon ship

1. Don't abandon ship. Like it or not, mistake or not, this is your responsibility and you need to take ownership of it. You don't have to raise the child but you're going to have to help support it.

2. Talk to the mother. If it's early and, depending on the country and state, you have options. Abortion is legal in many places and, barring that, you can always discuss the other a-word: adoption. There are moral ways to have the baby but not keep it.

Avatar image for Watch_My_6
Watch_My_6

290

Forum Posts

0

Wiki Points

0

Followers

Reviews: 0

User Lists: 0

#18 Watch_My_6
Member since 2007 • 290 Posts

Shoulda pulled out bro.

Now, you’re in $400 a month if you leave. Could have bought a used luxury car instead!

Avatar image for kadin_kai
Kadin_Kai

1740

Forum Posts

0

Wiki Points

0

Followers

Reviews: 5

User Lists: 0

#19 Kadin_Kai
Member since 2015 • 1740 Posts

It’s probably just shock, if your GF wants to keep the baby then you really should do the right thing.

Don’t worry, kids are seriously fun and satisfying watching them grow.

I have a 13 year old daughter, I wouldn’t say she’s the light of my life, but my life is definitely far richer with her and I’m glad we didn’t consider aborting her.

Avatar image for palasta
palasta

411

Forum Posts

0

Wiki Points

0

Followers

Reviews: 0

User Lists: 5

#20 palasta
Member since 2017 • 411 Posts

Should ve used the backdoor.

Avatar image for JustPlainLucas
JustPlainLucas

80134

Forum Posts

0

Wiki Points

0

Followers

Reviews: 226

User Lists: 0

#21 JustPlainLucas
Member since 2002 • 80134 Posts

@palasta said:

Should ve used the backdoor.

Dyslexia is fun. I read that as "should've used AdBlocker."

Avatar image for Gaming-Planet
Gaming-Planet

20780

Forum Posts

0

Wiki Points

0

Followers

Reviews: 12

User Lists: 0

#22 Gaming-Planet
Member since 2008 • 20780 Posts

You should try consulting planned parenthood. Everything there is confidential and your parents won't know.

If you're an adult, well... you're gonna have to make adult decisions.

Avatar image for shellcase86
shellcase86

5661

Forum Posts

0

Wiki Points

0

Followers

Reviews: 0

User Lists: 0

#23 shellcase86
Member since 2012 • 5661 Posts

Congrats. It's not easy, but stepping up and being a dad is well-worth it.

Avatar image for speeny
Speeny

2968

Forum Posts

0

Wiki Points

0

Followers

Reviews: 22

User Lists: 5

#24 Speeny
Member since 2018 • 2968 Posts

Congrats & best of luck.

Avatar image for lamprey263
lamprey263

39666

Forum Posts

0

Wiki Points

0

Followers

Reviews: 10

User Lists: 0

#25  Edited By lamprey263
Member since 2006 • 39666 Posts

Best case, she makes way more than you will in several lifetimes, she wants to use this to seal the deal and make an honest man out if you, and you can be a stay at home dad.

If it doesn't work out, maybe next time start your next relationship out like:

Loading Video...

Avatar image for zaryia
Zaryia

15668

Forum Posts

0

Wiki Points

0

Followers

Reviews: 0

User Lists: 0

#26 Zaryia
Member since 2016 • 15668 Posts

Just get an abortion.