Girl is not interested but I am

Should I pursue? She didn't outright reject me, she's indifferent towards me.

I don't know what to do. I'm deeply in love with her and no one comes as close to my heart than she does. I tried dating and talking to other girls but my hearts want no one except her. I just keep looking for her in other girls. I love the sound of her name. I never felt the same way regarding anyone. She really feels like a soul mate.

Is it that same girl?

@Gamerno6666: Yes.. :(

Give it up, getting married to some other girl and settle down.

The same chick you made a thread about over a year ago? Dude, aren't you in medicine? Focus!

Just let it go man.

Never give up mate. Ask to take her for dinner. Tell her your interested in her and you want to know if the feeling is mutual. If she says no, tell her thanks, you just had to clear it off your chest.

Girl is not interested

I'm sorry, is that not the end of the story?

@Storm_Marine: Today is not tomorrow.

The girl I'm now engaged to turned me down the first time I asked. We started dating about 9 months after that and now we're planning a wedding. I'm so glad I kept talking to her and pursing her or else I probably wouldn't be planning to get married.

Maybe not entirely but you could hang out with her as a friend and possibly build up her positive view of you so that you could offer an interest at a later time.

Before I enter this thread and saw who it is, I had a feeling it was gonna be the same old dirty girlfriend who doesn't give a crap on poor TehFuneral and this thread did exactly what I expected, you didn't learn your lesson from last year and so last year ect.

Okay bro, I know it's very hard but you must let it go! There are other girls to talk to and if she hates you, that's on her for not accepting you.

Bottom line: Find someone who will catch your fancy, get out and start talking to other girls and if you struck lucky, go on a date and see where's it going. Not that hard man and I wish you good luck.

I keep telling him that. There are other girls to talk, it's not the end of the world if TC is strong enough.

I wouldnt push myself on her. You could be friends with her though. But pushing is just being obnoxious.

@davillain-: That's true. There are other ladies out there for you to hang out with. Date a few women TC. Mingle around.

How bout you do yourself a favour and give yourself opportunities to meet other girls?

I'd tell you to not give up hope easily but i'm getting the impression that you've been pursuing this one for a couple of years...

If she was interested there wouldn't be an outright need to pursue, the effort should go both ways but if she's not and she's indifferent it's not worth your time. Be open to others and respect what this current girl is putting off if she's indifferent that's okay.

If you really liked her, then you would respect her feelings that she does not see you that way. Patience is a virtue, and if you can't handle that then you're on a path to destruction.

Yeah. Pretty much this. It probably would make it appear as if you're desperate if you keep trying to push the issue. Best course of action would be to just remain a good friend for the time being. Who knows, she may just come around to liking you or you may just find someone else worth pursuing...

@Storm_Marine: She feels like a soul mate :(

@mirgamer: I did.. no one came as close. I just keep trying to find the same girl in other people.

@davillain-: I did bro. I just can't. I keep looking for the same girl in other people. I don't know why, I don't want to be pathetically helpless but I am. No one would attract me the same way. I'm just stuck on here. I know I probably won't get her but I have a feeling i'll be letting my soul mate go if I sit and do nothing.

@SOedipus: The only way I can get through in medicine is by thinking about her.

If she's not interested, she's not interested.

continue to go for it OP, and see where it leads to when she gets a restraining order on you

If she has expressed no interest. Time to move on. You are wasting your life even entertaining the thought.

"love" is just a bunch of chemical signals in your brain that make you attracted to someone. As someone who is in med school, you should probably understand that. If she rejects you, try a few more times. If she still doesn't want to hook up, then move on...theres literally billions of fish in the sea. The idea that you will "never" meet someone else that you will love is BS. Its a fact that people who fall in love do so because of proximity...from a workplace/school/aquaintance of an aquaintance, etc etc. If you moved somewhere else, you'd "love" someone else there as well. Just the way people are...again there are plenty of fish in the sea. So don't get hung up over one particular female, just your brain playing tricks on you.

Life is sad.

I've never had this problem before. Usually it's the other way around - someone's flirting with me but I don't feel that I'm good enough for them...

On rare occasion I've found someone attractive and received a look of disapproval - and I would NEVER pursue that.

Time to move on plenty of girls out there...Can't get over her?..you didn't even have her to begin with. Go talk to a professional...don't end up being a stalker & a creep.

I think you should talk to a counselor. I'm not trying to be rude, and it's definitely nothing to be ashamed about. But I think that your obsession isn't really healthy and talking to a professional may help you in dealing with the harsh reality. It sounds like you have a real prospective future ahead of you. It would be a shame if that is all thrown to waste because of your feelings towards a girl.

One question: How old are you?

But as to your question, there's nothing to do. Pursuing someone who's not interested in you wouldn't end well. Pushing the issue will just give her real reason to dislike you. Nobody likes someone who kisses their ass, and if you're so obsessed with this girl that you can't function then you have a lot of growing to do as a person before you will be someone you should expect -anyone- to be attracted to. Try to focus on becoming a complete person before you start looking into finding someone to be with.

-Byshop

@thegerg: i would never hurt her. I love her enough that im willing to let her go, but my heart is killing me. I've always taken care of her from the shadows. I would never force myself on her. On the contrary, I should be more outspoken on my feelings for her but i'm afraid that would destroy our friendship and i dont want that.

Thats the problem right there. You are supposed to meet new girls and learn to appreciate what they have to offer, not look for the same girl in a different body. Of course you end up unfulfilled. They are not her and you are being disrespectful to them by expecting them to meet "her standards".

And how can she be your soul mate when she doesn't have any feelings for you? What you feel for her is infatuation, not love. I'm sorry bro, you don't know the meaning of love yet, you really don't i'm being very honest here.

I think you also need to learn how to love yourself first and have some self-respect. Realise that you have value. Right now, you're putting her on this pedestal and revolve your entire life around her...which is pretty sad and unhealthy. At least it sounds like it. Thats not how a relationship work.

@blaznwiipspman1: I've moved to a lot of new places and met soo many different people. Thats what ive been telling myself all this time that youll meet someone else. its not working. I wish I can surgically remove those feelings I have for her.

@SOedipus: I am talking to a therapist for my depression. I don't want to be deeply in love but I am. I don't want to be obsessed its a shitty feeling, but my stupid heart wants what it wants. I wish I can control it.

@Byshop: I am 23. Trust me, I don't kiss her ass. We're always disagreeing on things and fighting by teasing each other and whatnot. I love her but I respect myself a lot. I would never beg her to love me. One of the big reasons I tried to stop talking to her and meet other girls was because she started to lose respect for me. So I said **** it and I stopped talking to her completely. I made so many different male and female friends but my heart is still attached to that girl. My stupid heart wants what it wants. Logically, my brain agrees with almost everyones comments here. I just wish I can control my heart the same way.

These statements are polar opposites. If you can't "adult" on your own then you are not in a position emotionally to be with anyone.

Case in point. You're looking for someone else to replace her as the object of your obsession. You're looking for something or someone external to solve an internal problem you have.

-Byshop

Get drunk with her, make poor decisions, and get her pregnant. Alcohol may not always be the best answer, but it is worth a "shot".

You're bad at giving advice, seems like you get rejected all the time

The best way to go is move on and keep your options open. You'll find someone possibly better if you just focus on 1 girl. It's not healthy sticking to one girl.

I was going to do a bit of trolling here.... post a picture of a car trunk and some duct tape but meh.... you seem kind of disturbed.

First off you have to understand there is no "heart" and "head" conflict going on. Its all in your head and having these discussions, asking people what you can do to make someone "love" you or if you should pursue someone is not helping. This is obsession, its an addiction.

Second, you seem to be placing yourself in a non-existent relationship. Pretty much everything you are saying here is something i'd expect to hear from a 16 year old who just broke up with someone he was in a year long relationship with and lost his virginity to. Now, unless ive misunderstood the situation, you're no where near this.

Third, you've already established that this woman has no respect for you........... What more is needed? There's a big difference between not "liking" someone, not wanting to date them, or even disliking them in general and not respecting them.

I really dont know what else to say or have much advice here, i dont really get why you're thinking the way you're thinking. The only way i can really relate to it is by remembering being in 8th grade, dating a girl for a year who i lost my virginity to and had regular pussy for the first time in my life.... losing that situation is mentally devastating for a teen. But you're 23... go find someone else to obsess about. Go get a girl and obsess about her... go get a few hookers. Go to a strip club, good strippers are like cheap psychiatrists but you also get to see tits and ass and they might blow you for a few extra bucks. Are you drinking? Alone? It sounds like you're drinking alone. Thats not a good idea if this is your mental state, and its also not a good idea if youre on medication.

Don't tell her any of the stuff in the OP but do be direct with her and see what happens.

Go for her...if it doesnt work out then move on. Give love a chance.

Run, never fall in love with someone who doesn't return the love, if you're confident you should find other people and hopefully if she really likes you she's find away to come to you.

are you a virgin? If so, maybe that is ur issue right there? Also, people tend to have strong attraction towards people that are genetically similar to themselves. Of course siblings, cousins who have grown up together don't feel attracted to each other because of the westermarck affect. This girl that you're attracted to if you're really strongly attracted to her likely has some physical resemblance to family members.