Favourite verse from the Bible

Mine has to be 2 Kings 2:23-24

And he went up from thence unto Bethel: and as he was going up by the way, there came forth little children out of the city, and mocked him, and said unto him, Go up, thou bald head; go up, thou bald head. And he turned back, and looked on them, and cursed them in the name of the Lord. And there came forth two she bears out of the wood, and tare forty and two children of them.

I would love to have the ability to summon bears to maul the people I don't like. What's yours?

"jesus wept"

*in Liam Neeson voice* "I am Alpha and Omega, the beginning and the end"

*in Leiem Neesim voice* "I am Alpha and Omega, the beginning and the end"

metroidprime55

I think you mean Liam Neeson..

Oh and I don't have one, I've never read the Bible nor will I ever.

Deuteronomy 25:11-12
If two men are fighting and the wife of one of them comes to rescue her husband from his assailant, and she reaches out and seizes him by his private parts, you shall cut off her hand. Show her no pity.

[QUOTE="metroidprime55"]

*in Liam Neeson voice* "I am Alpha and Omega, the beginning and the end"

kerrman

I think you mean Liam Neeson..

Oh and I don't have one, I've never read the Bible nor will I ever.

Yes, that's who I meant, I don't know how to spell his name.

I don't read the Bible often.

Watch... This is Space. It's sometimes called the final frontier. (Except that of course you can't have a final frontier, because there'd be nothing for it to be a frontier to, but as frontiers go, it's pretty penultimate . . .)

well it's my bible anyway

You can't go wrong with the weird stuff Cracked finds:

:lol:

[QUOTE="nocoolnamejim"][QUOTE="spazzx625"]Ezekiel 23:20 There she lusted after her lovers, whose genitals were like those of donkeys and whose emission was like that of horses. spazzx625

Hey mr. Mod, I don't mean to tell you how to do your job, but haven't you gone a little off topic?

[QUOTE="spazzx625"][QUOTE="nocoolnamejim"] Oooh! Nice choice!BATTOSAI76

Hey mr. Mod, I don't mean to tell you how to do your job, but haven't you gone a little off topic?

Genesis 3:2-6
And the woman said to the serpent, "We may eat of the fruit of the trees of the garden; but God said, "You shall not eat of the fruit of the tree which is in the midst of the garden, neither shall you touch it, lest you die.'" But the serpent said to the woman, "You will not die. For God knows that when you eat of it youreyes will be opened, and you will be like God, knowing good and evil."

[QUOTE="BATTOSAI76"]

[QUOTE="spazzx625"] I personally like the distinction between donkey and horse emissions.nocoolnamejim

Hey mr. Mod, I don't mean to tell you how to do your job, but haven't you gone a little off topic?

Ok but he's making a mockery of the thread, and as a matter of fact everyone is, if this were any other thread one of you guys would have closed it down by now.

should rename the thread to "lets make fun of bible" :|

[QUOTE="nocoolnamejim"][QUOTE="BATTOSAI76"]

Hey mr. Mod, I don't mean to tell you how to do your job, but haven't you gone a little off topic?

BATTOSAI76

Ok but he's making a mockery of the thread, and as a matter of fact everyone is, if this were any other thread one of you guys would have closed it down by now.

[QUOTE="nocoolnamejim"][QUOTE="BATTOSAI76"]

Hey mr. Mod, I don't mean to tell you how to do your job, but haven't you gone a little off topic?

BATTOSAI76

Ok but he's making a mockery of the thread, and as a matter of fact everyone is, if this were any other thread one of you guys would have closed it down by now.

[QUOTE="BATTOSAI76"]

[QUOTE="nocoolnamejim"] I have reviewed Spazz's contribution and declare his posts to be on-topic since they are discussing the substance of his favorite Bible verse.DreamnDayUnite

Ok but he's making a mockery of the thread, and as a matter of fact everyone is, if this were any other thread one of you guys would have closed it down by now.

[QUOTE="BATTOSAI76"]

[QUOTE="nocoolnamejim"] I have reviewed Spazz's contribution and declare his posts to be on-topic since they are discussing the substance of his favorite Bible verse.nocoolnamejim

Ok but he's making a mockery of the thread, and as a matter of fact everyone is, if this were any other thread one of you guys would have closed it down by now.

yeah but...being honest...im sure that if this thread would be something like "your favorite scientifical theory" and if people would start mocking the way they are doing here, it would be closed, and everyone involved in the mockery will be modded

[QUOTE="nocoolnamejim"][QUOTE="BATTOSAI76"]

Ok but he's making a mockery of the thread, and as a matter of fact everyone is, if this were any other thread one of you guys would have closed it down by now.

lightleggy

yeah but...being honest...im sure that if this thread would be something like "your favorite scientifical theory" and if people would start mocking the way they are doing here, it would be closed, and everyone involved in the mockery will be modded

actually i dont think so. Because no one would actually be offended by people mocking scientific theories.

[QUOTE="BATTOSAI76"]

[QUOTE="nocoolnamejim"] I have reviewed Spazz's contribution and declare his posts to be on-topic since they are discussing the substance of his favorite Bible verse.nocoolnamejim

Ok but he's making a mockery of the thread, and as a matter of fact everyone is, if this were any other thread one of you guys would have closed it down by now.

I love how it's being deemed there mocking the bible by actually just quoting some of what it says.

Also.

Do not eat anything you find already dead. You may give it to an alien living in any of your towns and he may eat it, or you may sell it to a foreigner…
Deuteronomy 14:21

[QUOTE="BATTOSAI76"]

[QUOTE="nocoolnamejim"] I have reviewed Spazz's contribution and declare his posts to be on-topic since they are discussing the substance of his favorite Bible verse.nocoolnamejim

Ok but he's making a mockery of the thread, and as a matter of fact everyone is, if this were any other thread one of you guys would have closed it down by now.

I'm not going to argue with you but this all seems a little juvenile.

ITT: People got offended.

I love how it's being deemed there mocking the bible by actually just quoting some of what it says.

Also.

Do not eat anything you find already dead. You may give it to an alien living in any of your towns and he may eat it, or you may sell it to a foreigner…
Deuteronomy 14:21

MattDistillery

LOL @ people getting mad in here.

Favorite verse:

Luke 23:46: And speaking in a loud voice, Jesus said, "Father, into your hands I commit my spirit".

[QUOTE="nocoolnamejim"][QUOTE="BATTOSAI76"]

Ok but he's making a mockery of the thread, and as a matter of fact everyone is, if this were any other thread one of you guys would have closed it down by now.

BATTOSAI76

I'm not going to argue with you but this all seems a little juvenile.

"Go, now, attack Amalek, and deal with him and all that he has under the ban. Do not spare him, but kill men and women, children and infants, oxen and sheep, camels and asses." (1 Samuel 15:3)

"Then God said: 'Take your son Isaac, your only one, whom you love, and go to the land of Moriah. There you shall offer him up as a holocaust on a height that I will point out to you'."(Genesis 22:2)

"Wives should be subordinate to their husbands as to the Lord." (Ephesians 5:22)

"Slaves, be subject to your masters with all reverence, not only to those who are good and equitable but also to those who are perverse." (1 Peter 2:18 )

All the best bits of the Bible.

[QUOTE="BATTOSAI76"]

[QUOTE="nocoolnamejim"] I understand that some might not like some of the odder Bible quotes being posted, but simply posting them is not making a mockery of the thread.



The whole point to the thread is to post your "favorite" Bible verses. In other words, if their favorites are the silly ones then that isn't a mockery...it's explicitly on-topic. For some, favorite verses align to ones that make you giggle a little bit. For me, for instance, sometimes rejoicing in silliness can make life a little nicer to live. I personally have favorite verses that are beautiful and poetic, and others that just make me scratch my head and say, "...um...what?!" and for different reasons as well.Fuhgeddabouditt

I'm not going to argue with you but this all seems a little juvenile.

Yeah I know, just giving it a shot. "I fought the mods and the mods won. I fought the mods and the mods won."

Some of my favorite Bible verses include:

"For God so loved the world, that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish, but have eternal life. For God did not send the Son into the world to judge the world, but that the world might be saved through Him. He who believes in Him in not judged; but he who does not believe has been judged already, because he has not believed in the name of the only begotten Son of God."-- John 3:16-18

This lays it all out in black and white-- if you follow Jesus, you're not judged (that is, you're not condemned, and you spend eternity in heaven). If you don't follow Jesus, you're condemned already. Being condemned (and thus spending eternity in hell, being tormented for your sins)-- what a terrible outcome at the end of your life. Especially when you have the reality that God sent His perfect, sinless Son Jesus Christ to take the punishment for our sins. A huge scope to think about-- that on that cross, Jesus faced the fury and wrath of Almighty God. God offers you full, complete forgiveness of all of your sins, because Jesus paid for them on the cross. You can't buy it, earn it, or work for it-- you can only accept it. It's God's free gift, and so many people turn it down.

What's more, Jesus arose from the dead, and He conquered sin and death. Which brings me into another of my favorite verses, from that morning around 2,000 years ago when a few women went to Jesus' grave, expecting to find a body. Instead, they encountered an angel. Here's what the angel said: "Do not be afraid; for I know that you are looking for Jesus who has been crucified. He is not here, for He has risen, just as He said." (Matthew 28:5-6)

How awesome-- the reality of the risen Lord.

Genisis 38-8 Then Judah said to Onan, "Go in to your brother's wife, and perform your duty as a brother-in-law to her, and raise up offspring for your brother." Onan knew that the offspring would not be his; so when he went in to his brother's wife, he wasted his seed on the ground in order not to give offspring to his brother. But what he did was displeasing in the sight of the LORD; so He took his life also. such an uplifting book...Omni-Slash

Well, one of the big features of the Bible is that it shows us our sin. It shows our fallenness, and it also shows us God's perfection as well as His mercy and forgiveness for those who accept it.