Best insults without swearing

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#1 Posted by dylandr (4940 posts) -

I have a challenge for you people: What is the most devastating insult you can think off without swearing, this is not directed to anyone i just want to see how creative you can get!

@The moderators: If this is against the rules, please just close this and we will forget it ever happened!

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#3 Edited by dylandr (4940 posts) -

@Iszdope: would've thought you were going for the monty python insult >w<

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#4 Edited by fend_oblivion (6732 posts) -

You are literally too stupid to insult. [from Due Date]

You're a pimple on the ass of society. [from Futurama]

Of all the sperm that could have made it to your mother's egg, yours had to be the first.

If I were told to choose between chewing glass all the days of my life, hell, or you, I'd pick hell and chew glass as a bonus, any time of the day.

I thought life was a bitch. And then I met you.

When you walk into a room, I'd know because the need arises for me to ask myself, "Did it get stupider in here?"

Just because you are verbose, it doesn't make you intelligent.

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#7 Edited by dylandr (4940 posts) -

@davillain-: How's that an insult? .w.

To contribute to the topic myself: to wrongs don't make a right, take your parents for example!

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#8 Edited by DaVillain- (33070 posts) -

@dylandr: Disregard that post. Posted that in the wrong thread.

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#9 Posted by dylandr (4940 posts) -

@davillain-: lol!

so what is your best insult without swearing, i want to know how creative you can be?

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#10 Posted by DaVillain- (33070 posts) -

@dylandr said:

@davillain-: lol!

so what is your best insult without swearing, i want to know how creative you can be?

I got nothing.

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#11 Posted by dylandr (4940 posts) -

@davillain-: release your inner teenager man!

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#12 Edited by DaVillain- (33070 posts) -

@dylandr: And the the heck your gonna do about it PUNK? [See what I did there]

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#13 Posted by dylandr (4940 posts) -

@davillain-: you are going to beat up a bully?

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#14 Posted by DaVillain- (33070 posts) -

@dylandr: No.

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#15 Posted by dylandr (4940 posts) -

@davillain-: then explain xD

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#16 Edited by GTR12 (13254 posts) -

Dont have a cow, man.

Thats what she said.

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#17 Posted by dylandr (4940 posts) -

@GTR12: wait, who are you calling a cow now? or did you execute it wrong? >w<

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#18 Posted by DaVillain- (33070 posts) -

@dylandr said:

@GTR12: wait, who are you calling a cow now? or did you execute it wrong? >w<

He thinks you own a PS4 which is why he call you a Cow.

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#19 Posted by dylandr (4940 posts) -

@davillain-: oh, he wants to die?

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#20 Posted by GTR12 (13254 posts) -

@davillain- said:
@dylandr said:

@GTR12: wait, who are you calling a cow now? or did you execute it wrong? >w<

He thinks you own a PS4 which is why he call you a Cow.

LMAO, its from The Simpsons, its what Bart says.

The 2nd one is a weird kind of insult.

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#21 Posted by dylandr (4940 posts) -

@GTR12: What about this: "Who is that clown?"

1) You are calling him a clown

2) You say he isn't even a famous/well known clown!

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#22 Posted by brimmul777 (3891 posts) -

You ain't half the man your mother is.

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#23 Posted by dylandr (4940 posts) -

@brimmul777: hehehe, jacksfilms?

btw how're ya mate?

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#24 Edited by Gwynnblade (931 posts) -

I wanted to make a dirty joke, but your parents already did that *insert your age here* years ago.

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#25 Posted by deeliman (3996 posts) -

It looks like your face caught on fire and someone tried to put it out with a fork.

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#26 Posted by dylandr (4940 posts) -

@gwynnblade said:

I wanted to make a dirty joke, but your parents already did that *insert your age here* years ago.

im going to use that one for sure!

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#27 Edited by jun_aka_pekto (24558 posts) -

"Awwww. He thinks he's all grown up because he can cuss....BWAAA!"

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#28 Posted by dylandr (4940 posts) -

@jun_aka_pekto: Thats a real subtle way of calling someone immature

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#29 Posted by pboontap (140 posts) -

my personal favorite "that woman throws her vag around like a football"

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#30 Edited by bmanva (4680 posts) -

Yo mama jokes always crack me up.

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#31 Posted by thegerg (18446 posts) -

"coward"

"liar"

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#32 Posted by dylandr (4940 posts) -

@thegerg: but what about one that REALLY stings

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#33 Posted by thegerg (18446 posts) -

@dylandr: I just listed the ones that would sting the most.

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#34 Posted by dylandr (4940 posts) -

@thegerg: they don't hit hard enough, i want one that just hurts without swearing, come on get more creative greg!

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#35 Posted by thegerg (18446 posts) -

@dylandr: I already answered your question. If you want one that hurts YOU more than YOU are the one that needs to get more creative.

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#36 Posted by Gwynnblade (931 posts) -

Yo mama so fat she's the source of all gravity.

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#37 Posted by Ant_17 (11491 posts) -

"How do you live like this?"

"It must be fun to have so much vast space between your ears"

"If i say i feel sorry , it means i care."

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#38 Posted by LexLas (7301 posts) -

@bmanva said:

Yo mama jokes always crack me up.

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LMAO ! Good one, that was crackin !

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#39 Posted by jun_aka_pekto (24558 posts) -

@dylandr said:

@jun_aka_pekto: Thats a real subtle way of calling someone immature

He He. Works for me. ☺

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#40 Posted by Gwynnblade (931 posts) -

Some more 'yo mama' jokes I came up with while pooping. You may or may not have heard of them before but I assure you, on my part they're original.

1. Yo mama so fat, avogadro's constant was derived from her mass.
2. Yo mama so fat, she went up in the space and the space came down with her.
3. Yo mama so fat, even Phileas Fogg couldn't travel around her in eighty days.
4. Yo mama so fat, her mass-energy equivalence is infinity.

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#41 Posted by GTR12 (13254 posts) -

@dylandr said:

@GTR12: What about this: "Who is that clown?"

1) You are calling him a clown

2) You say he isn't even a famous/well known clown!

I'm lost now, what clown?

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#42 Posted by ferrari2001 (17772 posts) -

Not my line, but it's definitely the best..

"you stuck-up, half-witted, scruffy-looking nerf-herder" (Star Wars obviously).

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#43 Posted by PsychoLemons (3180 posts) -

"You spoony bard!"

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#44 Posted by Drunk_PI (2768 posts) -

You're explosive diarrhea from an elephant!

+1 internet if you know where this originated from.

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#45 Posted by dylandr (4940 posts) -

@PsychoLemons: WHY YOU LITTLE!

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#46 Posted by PsychoLemons (3180 posts) -

@dylandr said:

@PsychoLemons: WHY YOU LITTLE!

You know where I got that reference from? ;)

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#47 Posted by dylandr (4940 posts) -

@PsychoLemons: sounds like monty python

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#48 Posted by PsychoLemons (3180 posts) -

@dylandr said:

@PsychoLemons: sounds like monty python

Not quite.=p

Keep trying.

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#49 Posted by lonewolf604 (8656 posts) -

You're so ugly you could be a modern art master piece.

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#50 Posted by dylandr (4940 posts) -

@PsychoLemons: potato?