The Universe is what you make of it, good or bad. The player drives the experience.
Allow me to say that in total, I have about 9 months of playtime spread over a few years (I started playing in 2005). Why the spread? Honestly, it is because I was once a very "want it now!" type of player, for which there are MANY games out there that cater to that audience (WoW, WAR, Aion, STO, etc). Now that I've returned and am putting serious time into the game, the intricacies and full experience are becoming apparent to me.
EvE Online (now in the Incursion expansion) is all about the player. Everything you do has the possibility of affecting the game world in some way. Yet, due to this player driven structure, the game can be very intimidating to many newcomers, and is what I see most reviews written by players talk about as if it was the sole thing this game is about. I will grant that the game does have an extremely steep learning curve and there is minimal handholding in the early stages, but there is one myth I will dispel right away:
1) "I'm a new player, hence I can't join in the alliance/faction/solo pvp."
Anyone that tells you this is lying through their teeth and is probably bitter that they weren't handed a battleship right off the bat. In my time in the game, it has, more often than not, been the new players that have pulled my hide out of the fire.
A new pilot, with 6 days worth of skill points, can participate in one of *the* singlemost important roles possible in pvp, that of the "tackler." While the big ships duke it out and fire volleys of lasers, missiles, and projectiles at each other, it's the tech 1 frigates that "tackle" with warp inhibitors, tracking jammers and webbifiers that truly shape the course of battle ("stun mechanics" if you will). A player with 100+ million skill points and the best ship and weapons in the game is powerless against any opponent when properly tackled (a term called "locking down"), and many alliances/pvp corporations will readily gobble up interested players, train them, and even provide their ships and equipment, depending if they're generous or not. They can do this because frigates (lowest tech 1 ship you can fight in) are dirt cheap, their fittings are dirt cheap, and by removing that barrier to the new player, that new player can start making a little ISK here and there by working together with other players. See how it already starts to build towards something better? :D
This isn't a single player online game... this is a MASSIVELY MULTIPLAYER online game. To really progress, you need to work with others. So don't be shy, ask around, don't be annoying about it, and I'm sure within a few minutes you'll have a lot of advice (some of it bad ;) ) and a few options to pursue.
The con I see here, though, is that CCP really doesn't outline the tackling role as well as it should. The tutorial missions show you basic combat (dps and tank players), mining (industry players), and the basics of how to outfit your ships. They don't do much about tacklers (debuffers) or logistics (support/healers), however, I do understand that they can be considered "advanced" roles, especially as a proper logistics skillset and ship can take a year to obtain, if not more.
2) "I've heard that it takes years to do anything worthwhile, but I don't want to pay to play that long >:| "
EvE is based on anticipated reward. What I mean by that is that there are certain "milestones" that will unlock the next level of ships, weapons and equipment due to your proper "levelling" of skills (for example, unlocking a Tech 2 armor repairer by training the hull repair systems, hull upgrades and mechanic skills to a certain point). The early tiers of ships, those being frigates, destroyers and, to an extent, cruisers, are all obtained easily within a month of playing. One can even do the stereotypical "battleship rush," and leave support skills (armor upgrades, hull upgrades, stronger weapons, better repair/recharge pieces) until afterwards.
However, that is sort of like having all your candy on Hallowe'en night. You're going to be hugging the toilet the next morning and wishing your stomach was elsewhere, except you'll be in a ship that costs many millions of in game kredits (ISK = InterStellar Kredit), and will be very weak against other players and even NPCs during PvE missions. Losing a 30 million ISK ship when you only have 40 mil ISK (not as much as it sounds) is a painful experience. (Losing a 120 million ISK battleship with faction fittings and Tech 2 armaments is even more painful, especially when it's your own fault :P)
That said, if you take the time to learn in a sensible order (weapons, armor/shields, hull upgrades, etc for each level (light, medium, heavy)), you could be flying a cruiser (5-10 million ISK for high end ones) into PvP/PvE with a strong set of support skills and some fun times ahead, and more often than not live through it.
The myth about things taking forever is when you get into the higher game, where you are starting towards the higher end Tech 2 weapons and fittings, and have a whole bevy of background skills to train. However, by that time, you should really know if you want to keep playing or not, so I don't see it as much of an obstacle.
And yes, there are skills in the game (capital ship operation a prime example) that DO take 2 months to train. But, that leads me into how you can pay nothing and still play the game, giving you the option of playing, technically, for free while that skills levels.
CCP, in a brilliant stroke of genius, allows you to buy game time from other players with in game currency. Players will buy game time at full value ($15 for 30 days) and then turn that into an in game item called PLEX (Pilot License EXtension), which, as of this writing, is averaging about 350 million ISK on the marketplace in Amarr space (Youl system, Domain region, Amarr Empire, if you're interested). That sounds like a lot, and, to a new player, it really is. However, once you are about 3-5 months in to the game, that level of money is obtainable in a couple of weeks of casual evening play (2-3 hours a night), if not sooner, depending on your career path.
3) "I've heard that griefing is allowed and even encouraged in the game, that sucks, I want to play a game where I'm totally safe."
In all honesty, if you want to play a game where you're safe, World of Warcraft (or Hello Kitty Online Adventure, whatever floats your boat :D) is much more suited to that playstyle.
There ARE player pirates in the game. They are those for whom the entire mission and purpose of their playing is to make your life a living hell by destroying your ship, stealing your cargo, interfering with you while you're doing a mission, et al. There are even specific corporations that are dedicated pirates, or long term veteran players for hire as highly skilled mercenaries should you need another player taken out or griefed (the most famous of which is the Guiding Hand Social Club... google 'em for a good read).
I will say this in capitals so it's not missed: THIS IS AN OPEN WORLD, PLAYER VERSUS PLAYER GAME. YOU **WILL** LOSE YOUR SHIP TO ANOTHER PLAYER. It may not happen right away, it may not even happen in 5 years of playing, but eventually, another player will shoot you down. And the way it gets your adrenaline spiking will tell you just how immersive this game is :D
4) "It takes forever to get anywhere for anything"
.... Myth: confirmed, conditionally.
It really depends where you're going, if you're flying or using autopilot, and what you're flying. A battleship will take inherently longer to get up to speed for a warp jump than a frigate will, due simply to inertia and mass. I can roar across the empire space (the core worlds of the game, of which there are about 300, aka "highsec") in 30 minutes in a shuttle (fastest non-combat ship in game), or slog across in a Providence (gigantic Amarr freighter that can carry a million cubic meters of cargo (that's a LOT)) that takes almost 25 seconds to align for warp and warps at the speed of an old turtle climbing a mountain.
That said, if you have even a slight hyperactivity about you, you're going to be bashing your head into your desk many a time at the travel times. Thankfully, most npc missions keep you within a "Region" (a cluster of between 8-20 star systems), and can be done within 15 minutes for easy ones and up to 120 minutes for the longer, more difficult missions.
I find that it balances out, honestly. Most of the time you're within 5 jumps of your home, which is wherever you're basing your materials, ships, etc out of, and only occasionally do you have to do a 20 jump round trip to pick up an item you just bought or to do a trade/courier mission.
5) Combo: "EvE is like a second job" and "I hear EvE is like playing an excel spreadsheet"
It can be if you play it that way. If you're following an industrial career path (manufacturing, marketing, mining, surveying, etc), then knowing your numbers and your consumer base is key to making ISK. A friend of mine with dual monitors has 3 spreadsheets open at all times on his secondary monitor where he tracks market trends, price fluctuations, supply and demand, and the most efficient routes to travel to get those supplies where they are demanded. That said, he has only 50,000 skill points of his 25 million or so put into combat skills. He chose to be an industrial manufacturing/marketing player and he makes a billion ISK a week, on average. So, in that sense, yeah, EvE can be like a second job, and like flying a spreadsheet.
However, for the fighters, the combat pilots like myself, we thrive of the tactics and almost RTS quality of the game at times. Combat isn't as fast as WoW, and definitely slower than most MMOs. However, combat is really about resource management, optimal outfitting of a ship within those resources, proper positioning and range finding, and, if in a fleet (EvE's version of a group or raid, depending on fleet size), synergizing your outfit with your compatriots. EvE combat, simply, is tactics and strategy, wrapped in a desperately pretty layer of visuals and an engaging, immersive experience.
To summarize: Yes, the game has a stiff, steep, but rewarding learning curve, and can really suck you in and immerse you far more than any other MMO. But you really do have to slog through the first month to get there. I know it feels slow, agonizingly slow, but once you get into a destroyer or a cruiser, and get into Level 2 missions, the game opens up with better rewards, skill boosting implants that shortens the time it takes to learn things, etc.
EvE is also a constantly changing universe. Systems in 0.0 space are being fought over almost daily. Huge fleets of hundreds of ships working together clash with each other, where the new players in their tackling frigates lock down the enemy's heavy hitters so that the veterans can unleash hell and fury upon their hulls.
For both the veteran EvE player and the newcomer, as the tagline goes: "The Universe Is Yours."