Looking for Crotch Shots in Don King Boxing

I am Andrew Golota. I'm stalking the ring, chasing down my injured opponent and looking to deliver a finishing blow, preferably one below the belt. After all, I'm playing as the renowned lord of the low blow; the boss of beanbag blasts; the king of crotch shots. It seems only fitting that I tryplay to my boxer's strengthsasI'm checking out a work-in-progress build of Don King Boxing for the Nintendo Wii. The game, a follow-up of sorts to the poorly received Don King Presents: Prizefighter for the Xbox 360 looks to be taking the Wii Fit approach to the sweet science, with balance board support and a control setup that will give you a workout if you let it. Still, despite playing with a boxer that's known for his manic fixation on crotch shots, I am--maddeningly--unable to punch a single gonad. Perhaps they haven't included Golota's "style" in this version of the game, so it's time to change things up.

Still, despite playing with a boxer that's known for his manic fixation on crotch shots, I am--maddeningly--unable to blast a single gonad. Perhaps they haven't included Golota's "style" in this version of the game, so it's time to change things up.

I switch up from the laser-sighted ball-blasts to a more stick-and-move approach. You know, sticking a few jabs and hoping to land a hook as well if I can make contact. The different punch types--jabs, hooks, uppercuts--are all executed by moving the Wii Remote or nunchuck in an approximation of the real thing. Throwing body blows is as simple as holding down the Z or B button on the appropriate controller and swinging away. The system isn't perfect, the errant jab often becomes a hook and, often, your punches don't connect with anything solid but, if you're smart about your placement, and keep an eye on your boxer's stamina bar, you can get a higher punch accuracy rating than you'll ever see in a real boxing match.

To me, boxing games live and die by their defense. To this end, Don King Boxing does one thing right--itmakes blocking a snap by simply holding the A button. Dodging punches, on the other hand, is a bit of mess. To dodge, you hold both the Z and B buttons, hold the Wii Remote and Nunchuck out in front of you and move them simultaneously to dodge your opponent's punches. I couldn't get it to work right even by accident, though perhaps a bit more practice would have helped things.

Support for the Wii balance board is an added bonus--in fact, those who use the board will have an advantage that non-board players won't: the ability to throw punches while leaning. To dodge punches you simply weave left or right or duck down to get under your opponent's punches. Combine that with the rampant punching and you'll be out of breath before you know it.

It wasn't long before I gave up completely on the idea of a tactical match and just began swinging for anything that was soft enough to cause damage. You know, true Golota-style boxing. Sure, I was put down on the canvas more than once but all that matters is who goes down last and I was darn sure going to make sure it wasn't me. Eventually I landed enough punches to earn a special punch--you can bank up to three of these bad boys. To land it, you simply hold down a button on the Wii Remote or nunchuck and throw the punch as normal.

Beyond re-using some of the boxing and environment assets, 2K told me that Don King Boxing is mostly new code. They weren't ready to discuss modes in the game--though there will be a career mode and training mini-games that look to improve your created boxer's abilities. You also earn something called "fitness points" after a match, which seems to point to an emphasis on the training aspect of the game.

In addition to the Wii version, Don King Boxing is also coming for the Nintendo DS, with touchscreen controls and a decent combo system. After landing a number of punches on a foe, the action will pause and on-screen prompts will pop up, showing a number of different punches to follow in sequence. Follow it correctly and the action will resume with your boxer unloading on his opponent. It's moderately amusing to watchas you deliver a beatdown on your opponent; but it doesn't really make up for the DS version's unresponsive controls and so-so visuals.

After playing Don King for the Nintendo handheld, it seems to me that the good-boxing-game-shaped hole in the DS library is going to go unfilled for a while longer. That is, unless the developers decide to add crotch shots. After all, if it's good enough for Andrew Golota, it's good enough for me.