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• 3Jul 07

  5.5 reasons why Pearl Jam is evil

  5. Eddie Vedder eats microphones

  

  You can see the poor microphone try to escape, but Eddie slowly moves it towards his mouth for consumption. Pure evil.

  4. Darth Vedder

  

  Do I really need to explain this one? Pure Evil.

  3. ...Wait, if he's "Darth Vader,"then that means...

  Yes, I know what all of you are thinking. Eddie Vedder borked (if you don't know what that means, you can guess) Queen Amidala. Poor Natalie Portman. Why did you have to take her from me! You sir, are pure evil.

  2. Then that means...

  Eddie Vedder is actually Luke Skywalker's dad. Wow, thanks for ruining Star Wars for every single person in the universe, you evil hack.

  1. Princess Leia!!!!! NOOOOOO!!!!

  You are dead to me, "spawn of Vedder."

  .5 You'll never guess this one.

  When someone once asked Hitler "Why did you order the houlocaust?"

  He responded, "The Album 'Ten' really inspired me to kill all those people." And who created such an evil filled album? Pearl Jam.

  That got off topic quickly, but it was eye-opening nevertheless.

  • Posted Jul 3, 2007 11:19 pm PT
  • Category: Editorial
  • 6 Comments
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• 2Jul 07

  What are you doing in my house Nelly Furtado?

  Get out of my kitchen, you hack.

  If I hear that damned "Promiscuous" song one more time. I'll puke.

  Great job on making me naucious, you hack.

  why does your name sound sucpiciously like "Fart-Retard?"

  ...I smell a communist...

  You, Lennin, Stalin, and "Timba-land" (Nice name hack-zor), can go sit in Red Square, until pigs fly.

  Is Equal too

  oh yeah, put the paper plates back where you found them.

  Stop trying to steal picnic stuff, you hack.

  • Posted Jul 2, 2007 10:50 pm PT
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• 2Jul 07

  ...You're not actually going to get an iphone...

  ...So stop talking like you're going to get it.

  "Hmmm...I don't know if I should get the iphone, I've heard some bad things about it."

  Then don't get one, you're not "hip" if you talk about it. Now you've created an environment where technology is discussed just because it's "whats in," not because it will actually be cutting edge or powerful.

  nice job, you hacks.

  I don't know whatan iphone is, buthey it has a lower case"i"...like an ipod or an imac. And people like ipods...sooooooo...If get an iphone, I'm cool! that's rad!

  

  No, no it isn't, you hack.

  • Posted Jul 2, 2007 10:32 pm PT
  • Category: Rant
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