When I opened my eyes today, one thought ran through my mind: "What the hell was that?" I got info about Star Control II from giantbomb. Quite weird actually. I watched the last "Building a Bomb" video and the video was linked to SCII. Curiosity took me, I looked the game up. I got interested and thanks to a review in YouTube, got the game for free. Thank god for that... I downloaded The Ur-Quan Masters and started playing it on my old laptop about twelve o'clock midnight.

The story hooked me. It sounded interesting. Also, the shere scope of the game astounded me. It's so freaking big... so big infact, that I'm starting to belive, that I don't have time for this game.

Basically, the game boils down to collecting minerals while avoiding hazards and collecting data, dog-fighting with other space-crafts and exploring the whole f-ing space... It's a simple game, in design at least. And addicting as hell... But there is hardly any story now, you know your mission pretty much straight away. If there are twists, which I hope, I'm in luck...

But yeah... collecting dots and upgrading my ship, that was how my night went. I came across few threats, but thanks to the save anywhere option, the strategy part is stolen away.

When I finally came to my senses, it was five o'clock in the morning. I saved and tried some hair-brain schemes and went to bed. With a weird feeling... I don't get my condition. Am I awestruck or something? Is the dot collecting game that good or have my standards flewn away? I don't get it.

Like any other, I was devastated by the fact that Jeff Gerstmann left GameSpot. Time went by and yesterday I embarassingly discovered, that Jeff was back in a new site. I googled Jeff and found a Wikipedia page of him. Love the fact that a great guy is in there There was information about the new site. Now I have to gaming related sites on my Bookmark and an account to each. If anyone hasn't yet discovered this... unlikely, but still: http://www.giantbomb.com

So once in a while I get happy stuff too, and this time it was my birthday. The day itself (last Friday) wasn't that special. There was a physics test and I pretty much failed it. This was the first time in years, that I was kinda anxious about presents. I told my mom that I would want Stephen Kings "Gunslinger", "Drawing of the Three", and "The Waste Lands". (in estonian of course...) My father also gave me 1000 estonian money (kroonid, kui keegi veel ei tea). My mother got me the first two books, saying that it was a start and the second one was from my brother and his girlfriend. I don't really mind, I love the books, although I've never read them. I did kinda know, that they would be awesome. I'm really enjoying "The Gunslinger", I've read half way through, which is good, since I don't read that often. I didn't know what to do with the money first, actually. In the afternoon I surfed the internet and found a site, that transported books from the USA to Estonia. I ordered Ayn Rand's "Atlas Shrugged" and Clive Barker's "Imajica". Since I have read all the Garry Totter books besides the seventh one (in english), I thought I'd give the two authors a chance. I actually wanted Clive Barker's "Weaveworld" too, but you don't get that much with 800 EEK. (I bought a christmas present for my classmate for 200) I can't wait until they arrive. Has anyone read either of those books?

Good things don't come always with bad, but this time it did. My dad has been drinking alot and yesterday my mother finally threw him basically out. Haven't seen him since Monday evening... I wonder what will happen...

My dog Emma died on the 25th of October. Now I know what to wish on new years eve. A happier year, with no grief.

I finished Star Wars Republic Commando. A great game but a bit too straightforward for my taste. Nonetheless, I got a big lesson... do not mess with trandoshans... and those really agile ninja's that are a pain to take out...

Ending with a gaming related subject, i'm thinking of doing a Thief Gold gameplay commentary series, but I don't know where. Maybe YouTube or GameSpot... perhaps even both. I got the idea of course from AlbedosRightHand (YouTube). I have finished 2 starting titles and 3 endings as well... Don't know how long it will take, but I'll try to make it.

Well, I'm back after a... very long break from blogging. It has definently been a weird couple of months. We buried our grandmother in the Rapla cemetary (11. sept. 2008 ). Since that I had no wish or desire to write, draw or do anything. The funeral was... I guess I can't describe it. It was the first one where I had to sit with my family at the front with the body. Every time a person came to give his regards, I couldn't help but to look back at the time, when my grandmother was alive. I played the saxophone there too. I'm really suprised that I could pull together. Maybe it was a coincidence, but about three days after the funeral, our dog Emma got a child. A boy. I'm still not convinced that every time a person dies, life will balance it... I'm not just that convinced.

School has been tiresome. A lot of homework in the tenth grade I presume. I got a new english teacher. Tony from Canada... he's sometimes a ok person, sometimes an ass. I don't know why, but I'm tired from this. School that is. I don't know when it started... maybe last year or something. I don't know. It's perhaps silly... maybe I'm just lazy but I want a big break. On the 30. sept. I went to Austria with an orchestra. That kind of break is good, but I want peace and quiet or something completely different from schoollife... maybe I'll go somewhere on summer.

I'm also right back I guess where I was last year. I'm hopelessly in love with a girl who has talked to me only a little... I don't want to get hurt again like I did last year...

Anyway... gaming is so slow... I didn't know what to play... now I got Republic Commando and I love it... although It's a little too straightforward. I love the Metroid Prime look to the game... I'll try to finish it and play it again with higher difficulty...

I got the PC back today... some stuff are new, some old...

Pentium 4, 3.00 GHz, 2 GB of RAM, MSI RX9550SE... a new motherboard and guess what... no new hard drive, so only 2 GB of free space... NOOOO!!! there goes the plan of playing Oblivion and S.T.A.L.K.E.R. ... rats... maybe I can delete some files... maybee...

I'll try maybe Fallout... I played Simon the Sorcerer on the old laptop... great adventure, I'll try the second one too.

Oh and the new GS site is pretty sweet, I love it!

Summer isn't going very well... Sometimes it's fun to just rest, but now I don't have the PC in working order. There's probably ventilator issues or something like that. So i'm using a old laptop... really old... 64 mb of RAM... sweet... I can't play here or anything. MSN is out of order here too... The only game I can play is Castlevania and I'm not really in the mood for whip-swinging action.

I'll probably post something after the PC is in order...

Well... I really need a bigger hard drive for my gaming needs. Thinking (as always, THINKING) about getting a 500 GB hard drive. That should be enough for me and my siblings. I wanna play Resident Evil 4 again... finish Prince of Persia: The Two Thrones... get Condemned: Criminal Origins (the demo isn't enough!), S.T.A.L.K.E.R... Oblivion of course... and other big games with big weight...

Until then, I'm stuck with older ones, wich are great, but I need new ones too...

For example, I played and finished the first Metroid for the NES. Took about 5 hours. Got to bed around 4 o'clock I had trouble though with the last part... didn't get the ice-beam. If anyone knows, It's a hastle getting along only with the screw-attack :/. But I finished it, that's what counts.

Started from the start about three days ago Castlevania: Circle of the Moon. Really great game. Reminds me of Metroid and in some ways even better. Sometimes it's a hastle with the map and all... where the heck do I have to go, and all that Thinking of playing through Harmony of Dissonence and Aria of Sorrow too

Let's see, If I can get past that darn Battle Arena :S ...and beat Dracula of course

Also, I'm playing on a private server for MU Online... what a pointless level grind that is... but it's at least fun for me... so If I'm bored getting my ass kicked in the Battle Arena in Castlevania, I'll turn off my GBA and get another reset or two

Bye.

Some time has past since my last blog... I'll try to make it up for you. For starters, I finished System Shock 2. I wanted to finish it before AlbedosRightHand (from YouTube) finishes his gameplay commentaries... and I did... He does them not so often, so I had an advantage. For those who have played the game, I was a UNN navy. Playtime was about ten hours (I saved constantly ) and overall It was a great experience. I started as a psy-ops character, but stopped it... Started playing Silent Hill 1

Silent Hill is a pretty good survivial horror game. Although the graphics are outdated now and the combat is just... a pain in the buttocks, It's overall a good game. I'm currently at the school... that piano puzzle is tricky, but I know how to solve it. The game even scares me sometimes... mainly the atmosphere that the meager graphics and superb sound make... and I'm not that easily scared

Started Prince of Persia: Sands of Time yesterday and finished it this morning for the... 5th time or so (no, I didn't play it all night long...). A short but really sweet game I'll probably play through Warrior Within too on the hardest difficulty... then I'll try to get The Two Thrones from somewhere...

Speaking of Prince of Persia, the new one that UBISOFT is making looks really sweet. It has a really unique art style and the elements from the previous games seem to be intact. The game is made with the Assassins Creed engine and that troubles me alot... That means I'll have to make my CPU more powerful... or I'll make some money and buy a XBOX 360... Buying a 360 seems more likely since it will be cheaper (I have a crap of a PC!)

I have exams at the 4th, 11th and 16th June. Estonian, maths and english. I want to have summer already, but no... Irritating.

Well... don't know, if this made up for the... what was it... 3 months?

But see ya

The last week was probably the most tiresome yet... although school was a real slack, because of the schools birthday... 20 years... (Happy birthday!)... I had alot to do. Concerts were pretty much at every corner... One moment singing with our school choir, the second with a jazzband.

Yesterday didn't have much sleep. Half the time just layed awake thinking about the next day and a really special someone who I wanted to talk to. To make things right and settle the things once and for all. But as usual, things didn't go that way. I had two chances, but I blew it..

I'm thinking of going to the Johnny Cash memorial concert this saturday. It would be nice... really liked the music he made. Came from the soul you see...

Although I had a rough week, I managed to finish Dead Reefs. Today actually... sorry Lewuz... I was bit distracted... won't happen again When I submit this blog to Gamespot, I'll be on my way finishing the review.

See ya!

For one, I uninstalled Call of Cthulhu so I could play Devil May Cry 3 SE... Finally got it! I have been craving for it for years. Also, I started System Shock 2 from the start again. Lost my other saves, but I don't care. It's a great game anyways... and creepy as hell! The audio in some areas gives me the creeps even now... DMC3 is really great. Now at level 9, hacking and shooting the forces of hell is quite satisfying. I love the combos that you can pull off... I got a S ranking in level one too... level two is a bit difficult to a S rank. Got an A instead... I'll see what I can make of it...

About two weeks ago I made a deal with Lewuz. I'm making a review for Dead Reefs... got the game today. Played it until the tomb section. A key broke, so I'll have to find another or just get in there somewhere else... or use something else. The game sofar is pretty good, but not the greatest adventure game I have played. It would have been nicer, if it would have been a point-and-click game. The keyboard only controls are cumbersome to use.

Since I have a lot to do the next week, I'll try to play Dead Reefs alot this weekend...

I found a really interesting game on miniclip. (I haven't visited it in months or even years...) It's like Guitar Hero, but with piano. Since I am taking piano in the music school, it will kinda come in handy. It's not a whole piano or anything, but a really great idea for a flash game...

See ya around!

weird... every post this far has included RE4... well, just letting you know that I have started RE4 again, but the good news is, that I found my lost saved game, so I am currently in chapter 5-2 or 5-3... it's the second fight with that army guy, Jack what'shisface. trying to finish this godforsaking game, so that I can go back to UT2004.

Well guys and gals... if anyone noticed that my now playing list was updated with Half life 2. It was a short time only though... cuz I finished it in what... 3 days? And It was great. Got past the part in Ravenholm, where I left it, right to the end of the game. And guess what, I wanted to stay in the Half Life world... but sadly no. I loved everything about the game. Especially the last few chapters. The graphics were still great then, they're still great now. The last chapters reminded me some Matrix and Halo. Mostly Matrix. It's just too bad that once the game was over, I closed the game and realised that this was it. I didn't have Episode One or anything. Maybe I'll get it sometime this-or-next year. Or... the Orange Box sounds tempting. But because I don't have drive space I will be forced to buy some more, or buy an long dream that I've been having. A XBOX 360. The games that I want for the console are Oblivion, Bioshock and the Orange Box.... but wait... I want also the WII... because of Zelda... not just TP, I could play WW too... oh god... I want them all...

Started to play RE4 again on my PC. From the start... yes... I was somewhere around the 5 chapter, when I took it off... damn me... well... something else payed the price too for playing the game again. I've been having tough times at school... so I have to pull myself back up. I know... last week of the semester and all... but I want to do it....

for me.

Resident Evil 4 is a game, that I have been wanting to get my hands on for over a year now and finally I got it! (tänud torukatele! ) Since I borrowed a controller from my friend, I was in heaven. There is also a mouse support patch thingy, but I want to test out with a controller. I didn't want to test the keyboard action too... that would have been fustrating. I also haven't played a good shooter, only stealth usually or puzzle (Abe) games. Morrowind has also been quite fun with the archer mod in Suran and enhanced sneaking (time of day and stuff...)

Anyway, Resident Evil 4 is one of the best shooters that I have played in years, partially thanks to the graphics (thank you Euro version!), but the story is so far very interesting and the action is hard, but rewarding and pretty darn satisfying. I'm not going to start explaining the story, I'm sure everybody who is interested in shooters knows it. Although the graphics are nice, they aren't so good like the GameCube version had which is pretty dissapointing. And the cutscenes are pretty weird too, sometimes they are really good, sometimes weird-looking. The gameplay is sometimes tough because I started on the normal difficulty setting (didn't want the easy) and it also may be the fact that I haven't played this type of game since I played Cold Fear. It remines me of Cold Fear in a good way, the controls are similar so there's no re-learning, which is a good thing. Don't know if the graphics are better than Cold Fear has, but anyway, they're pretty darn similar. Speaking of difficulty, I died 6 times in the game that have been memorized by the game, maybe I died about 9 times. I would say that 3-5 times I got my head de-capatated by a chainsaw like in On the Spot (pretty much every demo ended by a chainsaw massacre). Although it's pretty horrible, it looks good. The physics are similar to Half Life 2's, it really suprised me, how realistic it is. You shoot a enemy in the leg, he drops down. You round-house kick an enemy, he go's flying through the air where you face with Leon.

I played about 3 hours of the game non-stop. Got past the Church, I'm near the lake, where a boat sequence has to come. I'll play this game to the end for sure!

Bye.

One thing i'd like to point out, yes I know I don't write too much here, but hey, I'm sometimes lazy like hell... i love long writings like that getting a groove on with Daft Punk at the moment... what a great song... Around the world. Well, I even don't know what to write here... i've been thinking alot these days... about my life so far and how will it go on. many of my friends know, what they are going to do 3 years from now, but I know nothing... sometimes i even wish i just wouldn't exist... my life seems so pointless... but hey, some's life is even more pointless that it shouldn't be mentioned... maybe i'm one of them, don't know.

oh, something to write about; i'm going to Võru at the 14 of august. saxophone camp again. sometimes i think that i should just quit, because i just don't want to play anymore... some of my friends say that i should carry on... if Võru doesn't up my spirit, nothing does, so i'll probably quit. the day before yesterday wen't to the Days of Märjamaa... a marching to the stage and two songs there... one was a good song that i played a year before in Põltsamaa, pretty darn fun.

some months ago i started writing a weird novel thingy, that is somehow based on Lovecrafts stories, but it is mainly my own fiction. it's not a copy of some of his stories, although some may seem similar.

it's pretty interesting that none of the estonian writers can't write a good horror novel/story. i'll try to make something, something exciting. it's a big chance that it will fail, but i'll see...

Hiya, its been over 2 months since my last blog, so I think it is a good time to do another.

First of all, I'm pretty dissapointed with the GameSpot crew and Aaron Thomas, for making a bad job on Tenchu Z... It deserves a lot better. They should have given the review task to someone experienced with the stealth genre. Aaron is pretty much a newcomer.

Second, I started playing Thief: Deadly Shadows again, just to play it through with a dual-analog controller. It seems pretty good, by now. Also, of course i'm playing with expert, only bad thing is that in the city sections the difficulty is turned to default.

I'm also going to the Laulupidu... whats that in english... Songparty??? That Estonia is doing after every four years or so. I'm going with the orcestra there, so maybe i'll be on TV Anyway... back to thieving I guess...

This is a little something that I really take off of my back... :

 The pain is just so unforgetable... well... this isn't that big of a deal... compared to my heart pain (not-literally speaking, mental pain).                 In school somewhere around my first lesson I got some pain on my leg because of some unknown stuff...   

This wasn't actually what I wanted to talk to you about.

1.) I dreamed this night, that I was sacrifiest to the gods by some mayan looking peaople on a big mayan-looking pyramid... I have been having some ideas since I read the books from Lovecraft to do a story of my own... "starring"  pretty much a mayan looking people... maybe the dream was a signal to get on with it? Well... I'll try to start with it this night. Lets see what will come out of it. Maybe I'll post some clips here on GameSpot too.

2.) The other dream I had was about me and a girl I had a crush on last year. It made me almost cry. It made me understand that I'll not see her or any of the good friends I have in the last class anymore... And it made me understand that I don't know anymore who I have a crush on... three people on the list...

3.) Sometimes I feel that I need a shrink... not long ago I had even some mental problems that I wanted to overcome on my own... and it seems I have... for now... the problem was that sometimes I started to hear weird things. For example when someone talked to me, yelled at me and closed a door behind him/her, I heard It two times or even more times louder and even faster than It actually was... and there was one incident when my brother (little one) jumped across the room and I heard it like a house was torn down. I think it was a mental illness.  Every time I had it, it didn't just come a a random moment, it somehow speeded up my hearing... like a sound of a car starting to speed up... and the same thing with it when it stopped...

When clicking to the updates section, my bloodpressure started to raise because of exitement. Finally something new from the guys that are creating Jericho. A great developer interview that specifies more the story of the game and some hundreds of times seen movie, when the squad are facing a old crusader-zombie. The second trailer was great too, loved every bit of it, but kinda sad because of the woman that presumably gets killed... I hope that doesn't happen in the game, but it is very rare that it wont... I'll wait for the game passionately, because I really love Clive Barker's works. The first impressions article was impressive too and it is great to see so many people excited about the game. Wow... a half naked ninja, stealthy too . Lesbians in a game I'm interested to... thats a first one...

The second thing... lewus, I'm playing Cold Fear again, and planning to finish it, because I want to be ready for Resident Evil 4, which I'm getting... Don't know, I'm really loving it... The second game is Paper Mario for the N64. What a nice game so far... Love every bit of it Review up too! I promise I have always wanted  to play a good RPG, Morrowind was a bit too... weird...

Woohoo, my brother bought a NEC DVD writer!

Now I can play games that I couldn't

Camp was great too, great fun...

I played the clarinet there too... Triinu and I

switched instruments for the rest of the week, so I'll play

the clarinet. 

I got to the finals of the saxophone gig... Woohoo...

I really don't want to play there........