My "real" blog is here: thedocproc.wordpress.com

• 2Nov 09

  Sad Goodbye

  I've been a member of Gamespot since August 29, 2003 and have been an active poster over the years, especially recently. I've learned a lot from my many discussions with people of radically different beliefs than me, have even changed a few opinions, and have gotten to know some people rather well. For some people, I've gotten to know their opinions well while others I've gotten to know about their personal life.

  I've greatly enjoyed this time while at Gamespot but this time has come to an end. While I actually regret leaving, I simply need to prioritize my time better with school, work, social life, etc. I hate that I will not be able to sidetrack every topic I enter into a discussion about Jesus but hopefully someone will rise to take my place that does so in a respectful manner.

  While I am leaving Gamespot, I do not want this to actually be a goodbye. Our conversations should not end simply because I will not be active on the boards anymore. I'll continue to check the site for messages, and I do not mind being contacted by other means. I've already become friends with several of you on facebook, so none of you will be alone in doing so. If any of you have questions about Christianity or simply would like to talk like many of us have, do not hesitate to contact me. I do not wish to end communication dispite my lack of being active on the boards.

  Whether or not you believe in the power of God, I do hope he blesses your lives.

  For Christ's Fame,

  Mindstorm

  To contact me, you can contact or befriend me at facebook.com/Cameron.Proctor, myspace.com/thedocproc, and thedocproc.deviantart.com.

  • Posted Nov 2, 2009 9:11 am PT
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• 30Oct 09

  My Story - Obsessions

  Recently I've been trying to better communicate the story of my spiritual life. As such, I figured writing it down would be the best way. This way, I could examine the focal points of my life while seeing how I've grown in my walk with Christ. Also being the rather open person that I am, I figured I'd share it with the rest of you.

  Growing up, I'd go to church occasionally but I knew very little about what Christianity actually was. I'd occasionally go to church and my mother would pray with me before I went to sleep. Despite that, I did not even know what a Christian was. What defined a person as a Christian? I simply did not know, at least, did not know correctly. I remember even asking my mother this question around this time. Even still, my mindset was a group of people who believed in God, liked Jesus, went to church, and lived a moral life. That mindset stuck with me for many more years.

  That next summer my family moved next door to my grandparents due to my granddad getting cancer. I am so thankful for this time because it let me become really close to my granddad. There was something different about him, something "good." I'd very often see him reading his Bible and was very active in his church. As time progressed, I became a part of that routine though I did not really understand it completely.

  The summer after 6th grade was what I might have become a Christian. I cannot really say that I know for certain but I think this was the time I came to know Christ. There is very little I remember about it, but what I do remember is that after a conversation with my mother, the pastor came over to speak with me. I do not even remember a single word from the conversation. Whatever happened that evening, that next Sunday I joined the church and two weeks latter I was baptized. As time progressed, I knew I was supposed to do certain things such as read my Bible, go to church, be a good person, etc. What my motivation was, I'm not sure.

  Was I truly a repentant Christian or someone just going through the motions? I don't know for certain. As time passed I slowly became known as a Christian among my peers. Due to my personality at the time, it was rather difficult for me to speak with any decency unless I knew a topic well so I picked three things: art, video games, and the Bible. Whether I studied the Bible for pure reasons, bragging rights, or to make myself feel superior, I'm not sure, but I became known for my knowledge of the Bible both in church and in school.

  Around this time I had a thought in the back of my mind that being a pastor would be enjoyable. I could talk about the Bible and help people, why would I not do this? Well I had many reasons, mostly regarding my abilities. I was a quiet kid and did horribly in school (which was odd since I was known as being smart. aka. I made A's in Math but F's in Social Studies). Regardless, I did not think I could do it. I prayed a prayer which is one of the few things about my early faith that I know was genuine, I prayed that if God wanted me to go into full-time ministry, that he give me the ability. I prayed this prayer thinking God would never answer. I was wrong. Through various circumstances I began doing very well in school, became captain of a robotics team (helped me in leadership and speaking abilities), and began teaching Sunday School (yes, while I was in high school).

  Despite me being known as the preacher-kid, I had serious doubts about Christianity. Countless nights I'd lay awake at night contemplating God's existence, reality itself's existence, creation, evolution, etc. At times I'd be of the mindset of an atheist but practicing a moralistic Christianity that rejected all miracles, other times I'd accept Jesus' resurrection but reject all other miracles. Even though I, at this time, knew a lot about the Bible stories, I did not understand biblical doctrine. Was Jesus God in the flesh? What is discipleship, purely believing the right things and being a good person? I did not seek after the answers because I did not even know the questions. All of this was going through my mind as I was the Sunday School teacher for the youth department of my church!

  Being that God had answered my prayers by granting me a full scholarship to a college where I could get a degree in Christian Studies, I went with it. At this point, I went because I felt like it was what I was supposed to do and that all "devoted Christians" became pastors or missionaries (which is completely wrong, just to let you know). While my intentions might not have been pure, I obeyed. This private Baptist institution was such a blessing to me and would radically change my life.

  In this first year of school my many questions regarding creation and correct biblical doctrine were certainly answered but I went about it wrong. I became obsessed with Young Earth Creationism and the details of doctrine. If you did not believe in Young Earth Creationism then I sincerely questioned your view of the Bible. I loved this subject to such an extent that I ended up visiting the Creation Museum in Kentucky, a 9 hour drive being the farthest I'd ever been from home.

  Then came a rather interesting time in my life. I gained a new obsession, a female. We became extremely serious extremely fast. As a result, emotions ran high and she became my idol like none I'd ever had previously. I put God on hold. I also began saving money for an engagement ring. I wanted to marry her.

  But God had different plans. At the realization that the relationship was not perfect, I was left alone. God wanted nothing in my life to take his rightful place. I felt as if life itself was gone. All I had left was God and all I knew to do was pray. This prayer was my broken heart crying out to God. I did not pray for God to bring her back. I did not pray for God to help me. I prayed for God to be glorified. I told God that he could take away everything in my life if it would bring him glory and honor, even if I end up being treated like Job.

  I'd like to say that things became amazing from that point forward but God decided to answer that prayer. The next eight months was the hardest time of my life but was also the beginning of a new life. You see, I had gained a new and even greater obsession: Jesus Christ. Previously I couldn't get past the details of Scripture in order to see the whole picture, I fell in love with the Gospel message of Jesus Christ. Instead of being obsessed with the facts of Scripture, I became obsessed with the person of Scripture. Instead of being obsessed over the process by which God created, I became obsessed with the Creator himself.

  Almost two years have passed and my life has been dramatically different every since. Prayer used to be something I thought of as a tool that would help me obtain the desires of my heart. Now I use prayer as a tool that helps me obtain the desires of God's heart. Grace is something I used to think I earned being the "good person" that I was. Grace is now something I realize I have only obtained because of God's unending mercy. Jesus used to be a person that I was called to be like. Now Jesus is the person that I love, adore, serve, and obsess over. He is my life.

  Before this time my singing in worship was merely me repeating words and a rythem. From this point forward it became real. My faith was no longer just believing and doing certain things but became real. Religious practice from this point forward became the container of my faith, a way my faith could be expressed.

  These days, I am not wanting to become a pastor to gain some spiritual jollies, to gain the approval of others, or to simply feel better about myself. I now wish to devote my life to full-time ministry because I can actually make a living out of telling others about Jesus. Leading others into true discipleship, seeing people grow spiritually, and sharing the Word of God has become my passion. Though my original intentions might not have been pure, studying Scripture and going to school for the ministry has given me a desire for ministry. To put it simply, I was called, I obeyed for the wrong reasons, and now my reasons have changed.

  When I prayed that prayer, in the midst of my suffering, I surrended my life to God. I wish I could have freely given my idols to him, but I thank God that he acted in my inaction. The Christian life truly is a life to be lived, not simply a religion to be practiced. Oh what a joyous thing to be unapologetically obessed with the person and work of Jesus Christ!

  • Posted Oct 30, 2009 2:46 am PT
  • Category: Religion
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• 29Oct 09

  Jesus, The Son of God

  I wanted to do something different for this blog, I simply wanted to list a bunch of Scripture references pertaining to Jesus being the Son of God. These first references are Old Testament prophecies of Jesus future coming.

  Genesis 3:15: "And I will put enmity between you and the woman, and between your seed and her Seed; He shall bruise your head, and you shall bruise His heel."

  Genesis 12:1-3: "Now the LORD had said to Abram: "Get out of your country, from your family and from your father‟s house, to a land that I will show you. I will make you a great nation; I will bless you and make your name great; and you shall be a blessing. I will bless those who bless you, and I will curse him who curses you; and in you all the families of the earth shall be blessed."

  Genesis 49:10: "The scepter shall not depart from Judah, nor a lawgiver from between his feet, until Shiloh comes; and to Him shall be the obedience of the people."

  Numbers 24:17: "I see Him, but not now; I behold Him, but not near; a Star shall come out of Jacob; a Scepter shall rise out of Israel…"

  Deuteronomy 18:15: "The LORD your God will raise up for you a Prophet like me [Moses] from your midst, from your brethren. Him you shall hear."

  2 Samuel 7:12-16: "When your days are fulfilled and you rest with your fathers, I will set up your seed after you, who will come from your body, and I will establish his kingdom. He shall build a house for My name, and I will establish the throne of his kingdom forever. I will be his Father, and he shall be My son. If he commits iniquity, I will chasten him with the rod of men and with the blows of the sons of men. But My mercy shall not depart from him, as I took it from Saul, whom I removed from before you. And your house and your kingdom shall be established forever before you. Your throne shall be established forever."‟"Psalm 8, 16, 22, 45

  Psalm 2: 7-9: "I will declare the decree: The Lord has said to Me, „You are My Son, today I have begotten You. Ask of Me, and I will give You the nations for Your inheritance, and the ends of the earth for Your possession. You shall break them with a rod of iron; You shall dash them to pieces like a potter‟s vessel.""

  Psalm 110:1-4: "The Lord said to my Lord, "Sit at My right hand, till I make Your enemies Your footstool." The Lord shall send the rod of Your strength out of Zion. Rule in the midst of Your enemies! Your people shall be volunteers in the day of Your power; in the beauties of holiness, from the womb of the morning, You have the dew of Your youth. The Lord has sworn and will not relent, "You are a priest forever according to the order of Melchizedek."

  Isaiah 7:14: "Therefore the Lord Himself will give you a sign: Behold, the virgin shall conceive and bear a Son, and shall call His name Immanuel."

  Isaiah 53:6: "All we like sheep have gone astray; we have turned, every one, to his own way; and the Lord has laid on Him the iniquity of us all.

  Isaiah 52:13-53:12: "Behold, My Servant shall deal prudently; He shall be exalted and extolled and be very high. Just as many were astonished at you, so His visage was marred more than any man, and His form more than the sons of men; so shall He sprinkle many nations. Kings shall shut their mouths at Him; for what had not been told them they shall see, and what they had not heard they shall consider. Who has believed our report? And to whom has the arm of the LORD been revealed? For He shall grow up before Him as a tender plant, and as a root out of dry ground. He has no form or comeliness; and when we see Him, there is no beauty that we should desire Him. He is despised and rejected by men, a Man of sorrows and acquainted with grief. And we hid, as it were, our faces from Him; He was despised, and we did not esteem Him. Surely He has borne our griefs and carried our sorrows; yet we esteemed Him stricken, smitten by God, and afflicted. But He was wounded for our transgressions, He was bruised for our iniquities; the chastisement for our peace was upon Him, and by His stripes we are healed. All we like sheep have gone astray; we have turned, every one, to his own way; and the LORD has laid on Him the iniquity of us all. He was oppressed and He was afflicted, yet He opened not His mouth; He was led as a lamb to the slaughter, and as a sheep before its shearers is silent, so He opened not His mouth. He was taken from prison and from judgment, and who will declare His generation? For He was cut off from the land of the living; for the transgressions of My people He was stricken. And they made His grave with the wicked— but with the rich at His death, because He had done no violence, nor was any deceit in His mouth. Yet it pleased the LORD to bruise Him; He has put Him to grief. When You make His soul an offering for sin, He shall see His seed, He shall prolong His days, and the pleasure of the LORD shall prosper in His hand. He shall see the labor of His soul, and be satisfied. By His knowledge My righteous Servant shall justify many, for He shall bear their iniquities. Therefore I will divide Him a portion with the great, and He shall divide the spoil with the strong, because He poured out His soul unto death, and He was numbered with the transgressors, and He bore the sin of many, and made intercession for the transgressors."

  Daniel 7:13-14: "I was watching in the night visions, and behold, One like the Son of Man, coming with the clouds of heaven! He came to the Ancient of Days, and they brought Him near before Him. Then to Him was given dominion and glory and a kingdom, that all peoples, nations, and languages should serve Him. His dominion is an everlasting dominion, which shall not pass away, and His kingdom the one which shall not be destroyed."

  Micah 5:2: "But you, Bethlehem Ephrathah, though you are little among the thousands of Judah, yet out of you shall come forth to Me the One to be Ruler in Israel, whose goings forth are from of old, from everlasting."

  Zechariah 12:10: "And I will pour on the house of David and on the inhabitants of Jerusalem the Spirit of grace and supplication; then they will look on Me whom they pierced. Yes, they will mourn for Him as one mourns for his only son, and grieve for Him as one grieves for a firstborn."

  And now for some New Testament teachings.

  Matthew 1:18-23: "Now the birth of Jesus Christ was as follows: After His mother Mary was betrothed to Joseph, before they came together, she was found with child of the Holy Spirit. Then Joseph her husband, being a just man, and not wanting to make her a public example, was minded to put her away secretly. But while he thought about these things, behold, an angel of the Lord appeared to him in a dream, saying, "Joseph, son of David, do not be afraid to take to you Mary your wife, for that which is conceived in her is of the Holy Spirit. And she will bring forth a Son, and you shall call His name JESUS, for He will save His people from their sins." So all this was done that it might be fulfilled which was spoken by the Lord through the prophet, saying: "Behold, the virgin shall be with child, and bear a Son, and they shall call His name Immanuel," which is translated, "God with us."

  Matthew 3:17: "And suddenly a voice came from heaven saying, "This is My beloved Son, in whom I am well pleased."

  Matthew 8:29: "And suddenly they cried out, saying, "What have we to do with you, Jesus, you Son of God? Have You come here to torment us before the time?"

  Matthew 11:27: ""All things have been delivered to Me by My Father, and no one knows the Son except the Father. Nor does anyone know the Father except the Son, and the one to whom the Son wills to reveal Him."
  
  Matthew 16:16: "Simon Peter answered and said, "You are the Christ, the Son of the living God."

  John 1:1, 14, 18: "In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God." "And the Word became flesh and dwelt among us, and we beheld His glory, the glory as of the only begotten of the Father, full of grace and truth." "No one has seen God at any time. The only begotten Son, who is in the bosom of the Father, he has declared Him."

  John 1:1-18: "In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. He was in the beginning with God. All things were made through Him, and without Him nothing was made that was made. In Him was life, and the life was the light of men. And the light shines in the darkness, and the darkness did not comprehend it. There was a man sent from God, whose name was John. This man came for a witness, to bear witness of the Light, that all through him might believe. He was not that Light, but was sent to bear witness of that Light. That was the true Light which gives light to every man coming into the world. He was in the world, and the world was made through Him, and the world did not know Him. He came to His own, and His own did not receive Him. But as many as received Him, to them He gave the right to become children of God, to those who believe in His name: who were born, not of blood, nor of the will of the flesh, nor of the will of man, but of God. And the Word became flesh and dwelt among us, and we beheld His glory, the glory as of the only begotten of the Father, full of grace and truth. John bore witness of Him and cried out, saying, "This was He of whom I said, „He who comes after me is preferred before me, for He was before me.‟" And of His fullness we have all received, and grace for grace. For the law was given through Moses, but grace and truth came through Jesus Christ. No one has seen God at any time. The only begotten Son, who is in the bosom of the Father, He has declared Him."

  John 10:30: "I and My Father are one."

  Philippians 2:5-11: "Let this mind be in you which was also in Christ Jesus, who, being in the form of God, did not consider it robbery to be equal with God, but made Himself of no reputation, taking the form of a bondservant, and coming in the likeness of men. And being found in appearance as a man, He humbled Himself and became obedient to the point of death, even the death of the cross. Therefore God also has highly exalted Him and given Him the name which is above every name, that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, of those in heaven, and of those on earth, and of those under the earth, and that every tongue should confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father."

  Colossians 1:13-22: "He has delivered us from the power of darkness and conveyed us into the kingdom of the Son of His love, in whom we have redemption through His blood, the forgiveness of sins. He is the image of the invisible God, the firstborn over all creation. For by Him all things were created that are in heaven and that are on earth, visible and invisible, whether thrones or dominions or principalities or powers. All things were created through Him and for Him. And He is before all things, and in Him all things consist. And He is the head of the body, the church, who is the beginning, the firstborn from the dead, that in all things He may have the preeminence. For it pleased the Father that in Him all the fullness should dwell, and by Him to reconcile all things to Himself, by Him,whether things on earth or things in heaven, having made peace through the blood of His cross. And you, who once were alienated and enemies in your mind by wicked works, yet now He has reconciled in the body of His flesh through death, to present you holy, and blameless, and above reproach in His sight."

  1 Timothy 2:5-6: "For there is one God and one Mediator between God and men, the Man Christ Jesus, who gave Himself a ransom for all, to be testified in due time."

  Titus 2:13-14: "looking for the blessed hope and glorious appearing of our great God and Savior Jesus Christ, who gave Himself for us, that He might redeem us from every lawless deed and purify for Himself His own special people, zealous for good works."

  Hebrews 1:1-3: "God, who at various times and in various ways spoke in time past to the fathers by the prophets, has in these last days spoken to us by His Son, whom He has appointed heir of all things, through whom also He made the worlds; who being the brightness of His glory and the express image of His person, and upholding all things by the word of His power, when He had by Himself purged our sins, sat down at the right hand of the Majesty on high."

  • Posted Oct 29, 2009 4:13 am PT
  • Category: Religion
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