I know I've been away for a while but you guys didn't honestly think I would miss out on an opportunity to drone on and on in a negative way about the video game industry did you? I thought you guys knew me better than that!

So, just like last year when I did the Devil's Advocate edition of E3 2007, I'm going to sit around and poke holes in the obvious propoganda that the "Big 3" want you so much to believe in so they can hand you a glass of their Kool-Aid.

Microsoft

One thing Microsoft seems to be missing from their pressers are a definitive personality. Nintendo has Reggie and Miyamoto, Sony used to have Kaz and Microsoft just seems to throw out some person from management and they are a little... what's the word? Oh yeah, DRY.

We saw Fallout 3... big deal. Its a multi-platform release. Bethesda could have just shown it at their own presser and been just fine. Is anyone concerned about this game being bad and needed reassurance? Seriously, I'm pretty sure its going to be amazing, no need to waste time showing it. It's almost like taking 10 minutes out of my day to tell me why eating and drinking are good for me.

We saw Resident Evil 5... once again, big deal its a multi-platform release. It looks a whole lot like RE4 and no time was really taken to explain what makes this one better or at least different from RE4. Oh wait, they did mention that it took place in Africa, in what had to be the most offensive and stereotypical name given a place in Africa by foreigners.

Then I kind of zoned out as I was distracted by something shiny in my house that proved way more interesting for about 10 minutes.

Hey, look Avatars! Wow, how original, Microsoft! Oh wait, they would be if they weren't blatant ripoffs of the Mii's from Nintendo. Later, when Shane Kim was interviewed by Dan Hsu, who had the audacity to imply that the avatars were a reaction to Nintendo's Mii's, Shane was visibly upset and seemed shocked that Dan could make such a leap. After further prodding Shane did back down and use the phrase, "Well, that may be true but we never claimed to invent them." Awesome, just awesome.

Ok, now we've abandoned gaming so that Microsoft can continue to feed me the idea that I want to use my Xbox to watch movies through their partnership with Netflix. As someone with both an Xbox 360 and a Netflix subscription, what the hell did I get out of this arrangement? Nothing. I already have both and from what I understand about the numbers that are WAY more Netflix subscribers than Xbox Live subscribers so who benefits from this? There's a decent chance that people already have both.

I then decided to clip my toe nails for 10 minutes.

Final Fantasy is coming to the 360. Ok, and... oh wait, that's it? That's the big bombshell that you're going to drop on us? I bet the people at Microsoft are sitting around patting themselves on the back over this "triumph". What they're not telling you is that releasing on the 360 is almost a necisity at this point for Square-Enix. They don't release games but every few years and their budgets have to be through the freaking roof at this point... they needed MS almost as much as MS needed some credibility in the Japanese market. Its a smart business decision for both parties but not the "victory" that I think MS paints it to be.

Nintendo

Good to see my mom away from my dad and leading a press conference this morning. Oh wait, that's not my mom but damn that woman has the same false perkiness that my mom does and frankly I feel a little queasy. Jesus, where the hell is Reggie when you need him? This woman is driving me nuts. Now, she's showing her mother's day card! I think I'm going to be sick... we get it, your kid thinks your awesome cause you work for Nintendo, great. Why not just give the kid ten bucks and have him run on stage and tell you how great you are in front of hundreds of people while you're at it?

Thank God, Reggie! I've never been so happy to see the huge PR Incredible Hulk in my life. Is it just me or is Reggie some sort of giant? Where the hell does he get suits? From the Andre the Giant collection?

Powerpoint, powerpoint, powerpoint... I haven't seen this many boring slides since college.

I do like how Reggie took shots at Sony and Microsoft by constantly using the phrase "imitation". Way to have some stones at an event like this.

Now Reggie's talking about how many titles the Wii has had during its first 19 months on the market... its way more than the PS3 or 360... too bad they're mostly crap shovelware, bad ports or mini-game collections.

The lights go out... uh oh, this can't be good. I hear a drum solo the likes of which I haven't heard since I was at a Poison show a few years ago. Oh wait, its some guy who looks like Jai from Queer Eye for the Straight Guy using his Wii-mote and balance board as a drum set. Guess Nintendo figures you're tired of constantly adding plastic musical instruments to your living room decor.

Finally, Miyamoto-san is here. Its my firm belief that Miyamoto has a pretty good grasp of the English language but just prefers Japanese. I could be wrong, but its just a feeling I get. So Miyamoto shows off Wii Music and it doesn't look so much like a game as it does a bizarre, yet, intuitive MIDI synthesizer.

Time for middle management to come out and do an air, virtual instrument a rendition of the Mario Brothers theme. These people couldn't have been any more fake enthused if you drugged them. We get it, Nintendo, you're family friendly and fun... but make us think that you're believable fun not this fake, Joker smile-esque, cult look that your people have.

Wii Sports 2! What a shock... oh wait, Wii Sports Resort? What the hell is that? Shuffleboard and bingo?

Reggie's wrapping it up and taking more swipes at Sony and Microsoft using the word "imitation" more. Awesome. Why not just call them posers while you're at it, Reg?

Sony

You know your presser isn't going well when it starts with you telling people that they should still wait because of all the good games that came out for the previous platforms way down the line. Yes, God of War 2 came out 7 years after the PS2 launched but that's not exactly reassuring to people who got a second mortgage for what is basically a Blu-Ray player that can play Metal Gear Solid 4.

Hey, did you guys know that Sony won the format war? This is the first I've heard of it... and the second... and the third... and the fourth. Jesus, we got it. Blu-Ray beat HD-DVD. Why not just spend five minutes of my life telling me the sun came up this morning.

Who the hell is this guy anyway? He reminds more of a high school science teacher than a video game industry talking head. I can't believe I'm saying this but I would rather watch Kaz say RRRRRRRIIIIIIDDDDDDDGGGGGEEEEEEEE RRRRAAACCCCCCCEEEEEEEERRR for three hours than listen to this guy!

Now he's talking about how the industry isn't about exclusive downloadable content but about exclusive games. If that's the case then why did the 360 version of GTA IV outsell the PS3 version almost 2:1? Apparently it is important to some people... you know, the consumers, the ones that you're going through all this for?

Resistence 2 is shown and it looks amazing visually. I might have missed the whole boat on Resistence as I feel that it smashes two well defined genres into some bizarre bastardized hybrid. You have your WWII shooters (CoD, MoH) and your alien shooters (Halo, Doom) but I'm not sure about crossing them together. Its my opinion that the only reason Resistence is in the position that its in today was that it was by far the best launch title for the PS3 (which isn't saying much) and that Sony fanboys just tell themselves how great it is so they can excuse themselves for not playing Halo.

More blah, blah, blahing from the chubby Bill Nye the science guy and I guess they showed something about Home or maybe they didn't. At this point I was so bored that I seriously considered the whole spoon enigma from the Matrix.

Then they showed something that looks like a cable channel revolving around GT5. That's all well and good but the footage that they showed had all Japanese personalities hosting. So are they going to show the programming in Japanese or are they going to hire the same voice actors to do the dubbing that they use for martial arts films? Either way... yawn, time to go clean the litter box.

I get back in time to see a completely CG rendered trailer for God of War 3. Apparently the people at Sony have learned nothing from the whole Killzone 2 debacle a few years back. I mean, who wants to see actual gameplay? Give us 30 seconds of CG rendered cutscenes and we're good, right? Right?

Speaking of Killzone 2 where the hell was it? Sony has been touting it as the Halo killer for so long now that it appears as their strategy towards having Killzone kill Halo is to just let Halo die of old age before Killzone 2 comes out.

And that's it... thank you very much, everyone drive home safely.

Overall

So, who won? Honestly, when the events are this bad I'm more glad that they're over.

Microsoft had nothing original to show and are completely ripping off both Nintendo with their avatars and Sony with their new party system on Xbox Live. The Final Fantasy thing was probably the biggest thing to come out of this E3 and even that's not that big of deal... its more of a matter of survival/thriving than it is a major coup for Microsoft. The days of the Third Party Exclusive are done and this just proves it.

Nintendo is going at things with the George W Bush "just stay the course" route and unlike our 43rd president, when things are going well I guess you can do that. I don't like how Reggie kept using the idea that you have to stay in front of the imitators by changing but gave nothing to back up his point.

Sony might as well have said, "Uhm... ugh... look over there!" and then ran out of the room when everyone turned to look during their presser. You can't start it off by telling people to continue to be patient. People who think that Sony will ever regain the status that they had during the PS2 days are completely nuts. Its not happening. Be happy with a 30% market share. Its what the future holds and there's nothing you can do about it.

If I had to pick a "winner" I would go with Nintendo by default. They're in the lead so there's no need to go all crazy. Microsoft is clearly playing copycat and Sony seems to just want to tell people that things will all be fine at some point like when Home launches and when Killzone 2 comes out... those are the last pieces... uh huh, just keep thinking that.

Well, thanks for reading this. I know I haven't been all that active over the last couple of months but I promise to address and correct that in the very near future. I can't wait to read everyone else's impressions of the events thus far. Take care.

Laughlyn

The weekend is once again upon us. Its been a short and easy week for those of us in the states as this was only a four day week but that doesn't make the weekend any less sweeter for being here.

I will occupy just about every free second that I have working on my machinimas despite the fact that its beautiful outside and the pool in my neighborhood is now open.

This thing has to get done and I've been having so much fun finding creative ways to dispatch of enemies that I don't want to stop now. In the past couple of days I've done everything from severing limbs to blowing enemies into smithereens. Good times.

The only thing that might pull me away from animation is a new film from the director of "The Cell" called "The Fall". I think it opens today and looks to be an absolutely visually beautiful film. It's probably not unlike "The Cell" in that the story takes a backseat to insane visuals and brillaint costumes but considering how crazy the visuals are I think I'll still enjoy it.

I hope everyone has a safe, happy and entertaining weekend.

Countdown to 100

My 100th blog is quickly approaching and in typical Gamespot fashion I'm going to let my 100th blog be about you, my loyal readers. Between now and then I'll be placing a little reminder on every blog asking for any and all questions that you might have about me. No question is too weird or out of bounds. I will answer any and all questions so go ahead and start leaving them in the comment section or just drop them off to me in PM.

I will answer ALL questions posed to me no matter how odd or seemingly inappropriate so start asking!

Until next time... take care.

Laughlyn

Anyone who's been reading this blog long enough knows three things about me:

1) I'm angry and wordy!
2) I hate Halo 3!
3) I don't think Bioshock is anything more than a good game. It is not the second coming of Jesus manifested into video game form.

Recently, Tim Rogers of Actionbutton.net posted his opinions of Bioshock. (Read his full review HERE or check out Kotaku's cliff notes version HERE) After reading his review its good to know that I'm not alone on an island of sanity while everyone else drinks the messiah Kool-Aid on Bioshock.

His review mostly stems from the idea that just because things are well done that it doesn't make the game one of the greatest of all-time. All it simply means is that the game is done well and that we shouldn't get so excited about something that is more of an achievement in competence than it is in greatness.

Yes, I know it brought Ayn Rand into the conciousness of a generation that barely reads and blah, blah, blah but take the objectivism out of the game and what do you have? A shooter set in the 1930's in an underwater city with magic! Change the timeframe from the 1930's to the future and change the setting from an underwater city to Seatlle and you've got Shadowrun! What an achievement that game was!

Now, I know having someone reinforce my views on Bioshock isn't going to change the minds of the people who love it, that's not my point in all this. Wait... what the hell is my point? Come to think of it, I'm not even really sure of what my point is so much as its just a reassurance that I'm not crazy over here. Perhaps, its that I've been cut off from the world for so long working on my movie that I just felt this whole article was something bigger than it was... maybe, maybe not. Either way, I feel better and less crazy about my own views on Bioshock.

If you need a reference as to my feelings toward Bioshock just check out my review. Yes, I know I say the game is good and not great but an 8.0 on GS equates to great... that is an arbitrary adjective asigned to my score and not reflective of my feelings.

Thanks... now back to my office to spend hours working on things that only last a few seconds!

Laughlyn

I am a huge believer in loving a medium enough to get the most out of it. There probably isn't a "c!assic" movie that you could name that I haven't seen. There probably isn't a "c!assic" album that you could name that I haven't heard. It's just the way I am. I feel like it makes one more qualified to really judge something if you know as much about its history as possible.

While I'm really good with movies and music, I'm not so good with games. If I was to put up a list of "c!assic" games that I have never played there's a good chance that you might pass out. There's also a good chance that you wouldn't believe me and just sit there in front of your computer monitor and say, "There's no freaking way he hasn't played that! That games has been out forever! Everyone's played that!" So, rather than subject myself to that kind of well deserved ridicule I will simply talk about one game that I just bought in order to cross of the list of "Great Games Laughlyn Has Never Played".

This week's installment is Starcraft. That's right, I've never played Starcraft until today. At the time when it was really big I wasn't too much of an RTS fan and with the market at the time I didn't see the reason why Starcraft was such a big deal... it looked like every other RTS to me.

Now that I'm older and wiser I can say that I see what all the hype was about. I haven't played the online yet mostly out of fear of getting slaughtered but I will soon. The single player campaign is engrossing and procedes at a pace that doesn't make me feel lost. Looking back on it now, I can't believe I waited this long to play it. It is truly a game worthy of all the hype that has preceded it for all these years.

Are there any games that you never played until years later that made you wonder what the hell you were thinking to not play it at the time? I want to see if there's anything else out there that is worthy of the hype even though its old.

Laughlyn

As I mentioned in my last blog, I was very close to completing the opening sequence of my next machinima project titled, "Worth Dying For: The Betrayal". I promised to have the footage up by the weekend but with the 2 week vacation of one of my actors and another one in France I decided to step up production so that at least one of them could see it before they left.

So, below is a VERY ROUGH cut of the opening sequence to the movie. Before you watch it and pick it apart let me tell you what's already wrong with it.

1) There is no audio for the first minute as I'm still waiting on the voice work to come back from one of my actors.
2) The black and white portion of the sequence is way too long and needs to be shortened but I can't do that until I get the voice work back.
3) The shot where the "hero" is walking along the bridge is not my favorite and may change.
4) There is no music but it will have music once I get the voice work back and manage to get a real running time for the actual finished sequence.

So, with all that said, everyone take a look and get a good one because I'm only going to keep it up for about 24 hours so you guys can check it out then I'm taking it down so as not to be taken as a real representation of what the final film will be since it still needs work. I hope you enjoy it.

Laughlyn

What A Match

For some reason that I can't quite figure out people here in the US hate soccer. To me how you can be a fan of one type of sport yet think others are terrible just doesn't make any sense. Competition is competition no matter the rules of the game. With that said, I just got done watching what has to be one of the greatest soccer matches that I've seen in a long time, the Champions League Final.

Man U pulled it out over Chelsea on PK's (still a terrible way to decide something so important but I digress). Aside from attempting to get some work done today I was glued to the match and was glad that it was played at a time that was convenient for me here in the US.

For those of you who might hate soccer, give it a try. Watch a real match (with clubs from Europe or Latin America) and not the crap that they're trying to pass as soccer here in the states. If you were to watch it, you might find that you enjoy it. If it was such a horrendous game then why is it the most popular sport in the world, hands down? Not to be preachy but for real sports fans I feel like they're missing out by boycotting soccer for whatever reason.

Slowly But Surely

Like I said above, I spent the day watching the Champions League Final as well as getting some work done on my machinima. For the past month I have been working on one scene and one scene alone, the opening sequence, and I think I'm finally about 1/2 way finished with it. The good news is that once this sequence is finished it should be pretty smooth sailing after this since I always tend to make the opening sequences of my films exceptionally elaborate as a way of grabbing the audience.

So for everyone who was asking about release dates and stuff for the movies... right now I'm shooting for a Fall 2008 release of part 2 to the trilogy, titled, "Worth Dying For: The Betrayal" and a Winter/Spring 2009 release for the final chapter, "Worth Dying For: The Redemption". I know it seems far away but I've already accounted for my move as well as the fact that I'm only one man! And don't worry, as updates become available I'll be sure to pass them on to you guys, my friends at Gamespot, since I've really seen an interest in them!

If you're at all interested in checking out the first movie you can view it at my YouTube Channel HERE.

I hope to have the opening sequence done by this weekend to be uploaded to both YouTube and here to Gamespot so keep an eye out.

As always, thanks to everyone who has shown interest and an even greater thanks to anyone who's been involved. I couldn't have done it without you.

Laughlyn