I want to thank everyone for reading my stuff. I am going on vacationa nd am going to be really busy, so I might not make it back. I hope my submissions are up sometimes,and that all of ou remember tht true, unconditional love is possible. And, our Lord Jesus Christ alone can provide it. He will fill all the holes in your heart.

It's a bit scary for me to say this even ina blog - I never liked posting thigns a lot, but I've managed. Don't think it's anything like Asperger's, I always made friends pretty easily, but it's something but, you know, each of us is special in our own way. Some are just more special than others. I cannot stand any of the shows on today, it seems the world's getting worse. But, the Lord will protect you from thsi terrible stuff, and only give you what He knows you can handle with His help.

Yes, I've been there - I've had problems. And, He's always been faithful.

So, so long, and thanks to all for reading and enjoying. God Bless, and remember - ou're just a single, sincere prayer of repentence to Jesus away from eternal life, forever in that perfect Heaven, where nothing can hurt you, no suffering, you won't feel pain...I just get so excited thinking about it! Halleluah, Christ arose!

http://www.fanfiction.net/s/2041064/1/ is a great and humorous attempt to explain why any stars on TV shows age several years. It's mostly about Chrissy on "Growing Paints," but includes mention of a few others, including Chuck Cunningham. It is awesome and well wortht he read - "Sometimes They Grow Up Way To Fast" is the title.

You can keep your characters in character and just with your imagination, create a hidden scene in an episode that explains things.

There is no excuse for caling something an error when you know we don't see everything that happens. Would we like to be told - yes. But, soemtimes the writers must be like the old fashioned storyteller who people would sit by the campfire and listen to. And, while some asked questions, they cannot here - it's true. But, they can still let their imaginations wander, like...

Well, like this scene from a Hogan's Heroes episode that explains why Kommandant Klink's steps were brick and then wood for the rest of the series, the bricks being painted gold bars that the Heroes used, replacing gold the Germans had stolen with regular bricks.

Only Wood Is Patriotic

Col. Robert Hogan caught the look of one of his men as he sat on the steps to Klink's office. He motioned the man over with his eyes, and instructed him to get some red paint.

Quickly, while other men played ball and milled around, the paint was applied tot he one little smidget of gold that was sticking out. Hogan breathed a sigh of relief - it looked like the men were simply being occupied so they wouldn't escape, making Klink look good. Hogan had explained that it was necessary, after all, what witht eh Gestapo in camp looking for the stolen gold. "It would make a great diversion,a nd I don't want my men getting ideas," he'd told Klink.

Now that the job was done, he ordered mustached Sergeant Kinchloe to prepare a memo. One he typed it up, Hogan snuck over and placed it in Klink's mail while necking with Klink's secretary.

Hogan followed Klink into his office, and watched as Klink read the proclamation. "Bad news, Sir?"

"Well...listen to this. 'Attention all prison camp kommandants. It has come to our attention that various camps are using brick instead of wood. This is an outrage and an affront! Only wood - the symbol of our illustrious Black Forest - shall be allowed in our camps, especially in the areas of steps to buildings. Therefore, it is ordered that all bricks be replaced with wood immediately, as only wood is a truly patriotic material!'"

"That's an outrage!" Hogan said loudly, feigning upset.

"Yes, yes, I know...but your men will work to replace those bricks with wood!"

"At what cost."

"An extra slice of bread per week?" asked the often noncommittal colonel.

"Two extra slices," Hogan insisted. "And an hour more rec hall time!" When Klink started to refuse, Hogan cried, "Where's your patriotic duty to your country!"

"I...Hogan, why are you so interested in my performing my patriotic duty? You're my enemy!"

"Just trying to protect you, Sir," Hogan said humbly.

"From what? My record is flawless!"

Hogan jabbed a finger at the letter. "And unpatriotic, according to Berlin! The Gestapo knew already,wbefore they came out here!"

"They said they were after..." Klink shuddered. "You don't suppose..."

"Come on, Kommandant, the Gestapo couldn't lose a shipment of gold. That's a tale fromt he American Wild West!" Hogan, having surreptitiously grabbed a cigar from Klink's box, pointed it at him. "They somehow knew you were replacing patriotic wood fromt he illustrious Black Forest with unpatriotic bricks! And there another word for unpatriotic." Klink gasped. "According to Berlin, those bricks are tantamount to treason!"

"Three extra slices of bread per week! And all red cross packages on time! Now, please, get those bricks out of here and replace them with wood today...!" Klink pleaded.

A few days later, General Burkhalter was making a routine inspection. The Heroes had gotten the gold out the previous evening.

Klink beamed as he opened the door of Burkhalter's vehicle. Almost before the general stepped out of his car, Klink declared, "Herr General, as you can see, I once again have the most patriotic building material, wood from the illustrious Black Forset, adoring my steps!"

Burkhalter stared at Klink like he was insane. "Klink! What on Earth are you babbling about!"

"Why, the wood, Herr General. I know, that bricks are tantamount to treason, and I will not tolerate them in my camp! I will only use wood fromt he illustrious Black Forest in constructing our buildings!"

Burkhalter simply sighed and shook his head. "If you are trying to get me to yearn for your bragging about your no escape record, you are getting close."

Hogan - who had joined the discussion as Burkhalter got out, couldn't help but make a jab at Klink. "Well, Sir, you know, Klink doesn't allow any gold bricks - you know, that's American lingo for lazy troops - on his staff." Grinning broadly, Hogan added "Instead, he just looks for blockheads." Burkhalter smirked dispite himself.

Mr. Bear tried to think positively. He began to relive things, as stuffed animals were wont to do when frozen. Still, thoughts of Alphie brought one thing to the forefront.

His mind drifted back to a spring day two years before. It had begun like any normal day. Stephanie had spoken to him and to several other animals, talking about the joys of spring. He grinned. Mr. Bear hadn’t lived through a spring yet. And it would be just like Stephanie to take that detective bear exploring with her, or at least tell him all sorts of amazing things later. He expected her to run back up to show him a birds’ nest, or maybe one of those butterflies that couldn’t possibly be as pretty as Stephanie was saying, could they?

Instead, after a while, he’d suddenly heard Stephanie running up to her room. It was a sound far different than any he’d heard before. Far worse than the “I’m in big trouble and going to my room” cry, or the “I just skinned my knee” cry. Stephanie had grabbed him, crying her eyes out. And, as he was carried downstairs and hear people talk, he felt as awkward as any toy had ever felt. He knew he was seriously under-trained.

Toys were supposed to be for fun. Oh, some could be comfort objects. But, he was not your typical comfort object - especially for a girl. He’d heard stories, from other toys whose owners had come to play, of children who slept with fire chief bears, with action figures, even with toy trucks and trains like Thomas the Tank Engine. But, those were mostly boys.

Yet there he was, being carried by Stephanie, away from the rest of the animals, and longing to break toy rules and cry out for assistance. He knew it would be a very long day, and it was. He couldn’t believe the places he’d gone, the sad places. The places no animal ever dared take his owner, but where owners sometimes had to take their animals. It wasn’t until very late that night that Stephanie had finally gotten to sleep.

Weary, deflated, and sopping wet, his being sapped of strength, Mr. Bear unfroze, yet felt still almost lifeless. He sensed he couldn’t leave the sleeping girl’s side - she was holding on for dear life, with him hugging her back. And yet, he needed help. He fretted until Alphie and Pillow Person came into the room. Pillow Person had been under D.J.’s bed, until Alphie, noticing D.J. wasn’t around, had gone into D.J.’s room to get him.

Mr. Bear gestured with his head. “You heard the news,” he asked somberly.

Pillow Person nodded and sighed as he and Alphie walked over. “I just can’t believe it’s happened.”

Alphie laid a comforting paw on Mr. Bear’s arm. “Want me to cover for you?”

Mr. Bear bit his lip. He had no training in being a comfort object. If Stephanie did get sent to her room as punishment, she was just as likely to hold Alphie or another animal as she was him. But yet, he sensed one very important truth about his new situation. “I can’t leave her. I mean, she’s lost the most important thing in her life,” he exclaimed. “Her whole world has been turned upside-down.”

Alphie sensed Mr. Bear’s nervousness. “But, how are you holding up?”

“The truth?” The others nodded. Heaving a deep sigh, Mr. Bear admitted “I feel like a newly sewn ball of fur. Like I don’t even have my head or my limbs yet. Let alone that...consciousness little kids can give you.”

Rollie the Rhino offered to take over in Stephanie’s arms for Mr. Bear. “You need a break.”

Pillow Person, the most experienced of the stuffed creatures, showed Mr. Bear how to wriggle free. He got out, and let Rollie slide in. “We have to be ready to change back at a moment’s notice.”

Alphie nodded. “She could wake up crying any second.”

“You think I don’t know that?” Mr. Bear threw up his hands and ranted. “All this time it’s been ‘Mr. Bear, how should I handle Kimmy Gibbler here,’ or ‘Mr. Bear, let’s figure out where ice cubes go when they melt.’ I was even ready for ‘Mr. Bear, let’s figure out how far up my nose I can stuff a bead.’” A rabbit gave a “been there, done that” look. “But I am totally unprepared for ‘Mr. Bear, my mother has died unexpectedly, I’m scared of who might go next, and I feel like my life is falling apart.’”

Pillow Person wrapped an arm around him. “It’s hard on all of us. These aren’t the nightmare monsters we’re supposed to fight,” Pillow Person stated bluntly.

Alphie agreed. “It’s really scary for you too, huh?”

“It’s not just that.” They gave him blank stares. “Don’t you see,” Mr. Bear complained. “I’m a comfort object now. She knows her mom gave me to her, so she picked me. I’ve been promoted to a new level. But, there’s a big difference between that and a mere toy, which I was before; even if she was holding me during a timeout. And it was mostly you, then,” he said, pointing to a bunny who had been there since Stephanie was two. The rabbit nodded. “And, one of the main job requirements for a comfort object is that they shouldn’t be scared out of their wits themselves.”

Alphie hummed momentarily. He could tell Mr. Bear was frightened. But, he also knew that children clung to certain animals for a reason. And, it wasn’t always just their looks. “Maybe that can be a good thing.”

“What,” Mr. Bear and Pillow Person spoke at once.

Alphie paced slightly as he spoke. “Mr. Bear; I was just a grandma’s gift. And grandparents give all sorts of animals. But, you and Stephanie share something in common. Right now, Mr. Bear, you’re both scared. And confused.”

“So what do I say? I don’t exactly sound like I mean it when I say ‘It’s going to be all right.’”

Pillow Person threw up his arms. “You’re right. This is a disaster. A tragedy.”

“I’ve fought nightmare monsters before,” Mr. Bear mused, “but Stephanie helped. And we beat them through our cleverness. She’s one bright girl. But neither of us is clever enough to handle what’s happened, and what’s going to come. The funeral home was sad enough tonight. But the funeral itself? We stuffed animals can keep pouring out love in incredible ways. But I don’t know if I have enough strength to give all that she’ll need from me.”

Alphie smiled and put an arm around Mr. Bear. “Look, you don’t have to know how right now. She needs you to just be there to listen. Later, you can provide a few comforting words, and then more as you go. But what she needs right now is to know you’re there for her. Because you are a link to her mother.”

Mr. Bear smiled at the dog. He always seemed wise beyond his years. “Thanks.”

Rollie cleared his throat. “She’s shaking a little, you better get back here, this looks like a nightmare.”

Mr. Bear was amazed at how collected Rollie - won by Stephanie’s dad’s friend Joey for her at a carnival when she was three-and-a-half - could be. He sighed as he leaped up and went back into her embrace, freezing at he did. Though she didn’t awaken that time, she did several minutes later. “Mr. Bear, what’s going to happen now?”

Mr. Bear’s eyes grew wide. He thought he was just supposed to stay frozen. Was he supposed to answer that?! “Uh...everything’s going to be all right.” He wished stuffed animals could pray like he’d seen these people pray. He whispered “maybe you should go wake your dad or grandma.”

Stephanie rushed from her room to her dad’s room to D.J.’s - their dad was still up with her. Pillow Person had snuck back under the bed where he’d been. A doll had been standing as a lookout, lest she start to look for him and find him not there. Stuffed animals could sometimes change positions a little. But, this was a very bad time to do that. These girls needed to know things would stay put.

Mr. Bear remained quiet as Stephanie and Danny talked. He would try to glean as much as he could, and hope for the best.

Mr. Bear’s mind shifted back to the present. He had helped Stephanie so much then. Even after she met Allie, her first day of Kindergarten, she still clung to him. She got agitated a lot more easily than D.J.. In a way, he was glad D.J. hadn’t relied on Pillow Person quite as much. But, that pillow could only guess how to handle things. Alphie almost seemed more able to handle things, more able to help him cope. Stephanie had carried him around a fair amount, although that amount decreased quite rapidly as the months wore on.

And now, was Alphie able to help another kid? Or would he just lie somewhere, forgotten? And, How long would it be before someone opened that piano bench? In most households, it could be a long time before he was found. But, in a household with a toddler, the average length of time was two hours, it seemed. And if not - he needed to figure out how to check for time, so he could get out and catch up on things when it was nighttime.

Sure enough, just as he thought of that, Michelle opened the bench and pulled him out. Stephanie seemed elated to see him. She still clung to him a lot sometimes.

After they finished watching home movies, Mr. Bear wondered if the others had seen him leave. He hoped they weren’t worried about him.

Once he got placed upstairs and Stephanie left her room again, Mr. Bear noticed two things. Pillow Person was back on D.J.’s bed. And, Rollie appeared baffled, to say the least. “Do you have any idea what’s been happening here,” he exclaimed as soon as they could safely move.

Mr. Bear looked around casually. “No, can’t say as I do. Except that our friendly neighborhood pillow here seems to have been found.”

Pillow Person threw up his arms, then beckoned Mr. Bear out the door. “Follow me,” he insisted.

Mr. Bear gasped. In Michelle’s room were literally dozens of new stuffed animals. “Didn’t anyone tell the bunnies they weren’t supposed to multiply with us,” he shouted.

Pillow Person shook his body - he really had no head per se. “That’s just it, Chief. Stephanie was so bummed because she thought you were gone, so she got the chance to pick from one of all these animals their grandparents brought. Except Michelle got into them on the couch and claimed them all for herself.”

Pinky, Michelle’s pig, oinked adamantly “I haven’t even begun to get the names straight. And some don’t have names. And don’t think they won’t all stay Michelle’s, either. She’s already named the panda here Peaches. ‘Course, she was thinking about dinner at the time.”

Mr. Bear rubbed his chin and mused, “At least she didn’t have to go to the bathroom. I’d hate to think of what she would have called him then. Well, I guess we’ll have to have one massive welcoming party, then.” Mr. Bear grinned. “All you guys still couldn’t take the place of me, huh? Boy, that would really warm my heart - if I weren’t made of stuffing, of course.”

After several minutes of telling the animals about the family they’d just come into, Mr. Bear and Pillow Person received a shout from Rollie. “Hey, some girls might be coming this way.” They raced back into their former positions and froze.

Stephanie was coming upstairs with a classmate who Mr. Bear had seen a couple times. But, most amazingly, there was Alphie!

“Look, Mr. Bear. Sally, I used to have a dog just like that,” Stephanie remarked. “Wouldn’t that be funny if it was Alphie?”

The visitor shrugged. “Could be. I just know I got him today.”

While the two played, Alphie managed to sneak over to Mr. Bear. “Poor girl’s parents are filing for divorce. She’s really going through some hard times. I’ve heard lots of stuff just in the last hour.”

Mr. Bear grinned. “Well, I guess you got to the place you were meant to go.”

Stephanie quickly looked over that way, and the two froze. “Mr. Bear, Sally says she doesn’t know if that’s Alphie or not. I think it’s gotta be. I mean, I’m sure you teach all these other animals so much about friendship and love and stuff. Don’t you?”

And in the wonderful, timeless imagination of a little girl, Mr. Bear smiled, and nodded his agreement.

You can do childrens' stuff with great ease, and not just by making a parody. This is a story that exposes stuffed animals to be like toys, and yet is different than just another "Toy Story." It also comes out of an actual episode of "Full House."

If you liked “Toy Story,” you’ll love this look at a day - including one episode - in the life of Stephanie’s best friend. And, you’ll never look at stuffed animals the same way again. :-)

BEAR STORY

The stuffed bear dared to blink once. Out of the corner of his eye, he could tell the little girl was asleep. He paused, unsure of whether or not to get out of her grip. It was so much easier for the toys. They could wander around much more easily.

“Unnhh. Ergh. Okay, come on, I need my other foot,” whispered Pillow Person as he crawled out from under Stephanie’s mattress. A leg was caught under it still, and he tumbled backwards several times when he finally pulled it out. “Phew, Stephanie’s getting heavy for a seven year old.” He looked up at Mr. Bear. “You comin’ out?”

Mr. Bear squirmed out and adjusted his hat. The dark brown bear wore a spiffy detective’s outfit, and spoke in a light British accent. It was cordial, sensitive, yet with an air of authority that reminded Pillow Person a little of Star Trek’s Captain Picard. “Hmmm, I might spare a few minutes. It’s tougher, of course, with they sleep with you.”

“Hey, you don’t have to tell me about that. D.J. used to sleep with me all the time when she was little. Stephanie got you when Michelle was born less than three years ago.” The pillow’s eyes twirled, and he flailed his arms.

“Tell me something I don’t know, Number One,” Mr. Bear remarked wryly.

Pillow Person harumphed. He was much more direct that the whimsical Mr. Bear, and sounded a little like Woody on Toy Story, but not totally. “Must you call me that? Just because my initials happen to be P.P.,” he groused, but with a grin. “Ah, well, it figures. It sounds like one of Stephanie’s jokes. I don’t know whether she rubs off on you or you rub off on her.”

Mr. Bear shrugged. “She’s got an imagination. Maybe not quite like Calvin’s, but still, there are qualities of her that I’ve gained over the years. You know, D.J.’s just about given up looking for you. Care to be one of the toys going to charity tomorrow?”

Pillow Person rolled his eyes. “Every toy gets lost for a while. She’ll find me soon enough.”

“Well, spring cleaning will be the time. If not, I suggest you plan to stay in Michelle’s room for a few years.” He turned to several rhinos. He considered himself lucky - how many houses had stuffed rhinos with whom he could pal around? Especially where the little girls didn’t think they were unicorns? But his owner, Stephanie Tanner, was one smart, witty, adorable little girl. And, she knew her animals.

The pillow waved an arm. “Come on, let’s not argue about that now. We’ve got work to do.” He called all the animals to attention. Numerous toys also stood up and took notice.

“Face it, Pillow, you’re the toy of a girl who’ll be a teen in a year,” Mr. Bear analyzed thoughtfully. “And according to Peter Pan, she’s already at the age when she’d move out of the nursery and be considered grown up. She’d stop playing with us.” He grinned. He could never imagine Stephanie not playing with him. He knew D.J. had never had as close an attachment to that pillow. “In fact,” he added, “D.J.’s never referred to you as ‘friend.’ At one point, she preferred an invisible duck named Norton to you. Now that really quacks me up.”

Pillow gazed at Mr. Bear with a look of amusement. Mr. Bear had quickly risen in the ranks of stuffed animals there for one reason. After Pam Tanner - the mother of Stephanie, D.J., and the toddler Michelle - died just about two year ago, he and Stephanie cried together all the time. Of course, an outsider couldn’t tell, but to a child, there was something special about a stuffed animal. If D.J. were bugging her, or if Stephanie just needed to talk, he’d be there. And, unlike many toys, children could tell when a stuffed animal had a sort of life to it.

D.J. had had her best friend, Kimmy Gibbler. So, she hadn’t need Pillow Person quite as much. Still, he’d been there, too, for her. And, Pillow Person tried to defend his owner’s small attempts to maintain that little girl attitude while getting older. “You and your pointless ramblings. You’ve been good for Stephanie. But I am a sophisticated toy; D.J. says so herself. She’s growing into a fine young woman. And I’m proud to say that she used to drool on me when she was little.”

Mr. Bear gave a whimsical grin. He knew D.J. wouldn’t part with Pillow Person. Besides, with Michelle in the house, he could always get handed down. So could any of the other stuffed animals during tomorrow’s spring cleaning. In fact, he hoped one in particular would stay.

One of Stephanie’s stuffed bunnies looked up from a calculator. “Hey, are we gonna start the meeting? ‘Cause if not, we’ve got some multiplying to do.”

Mr. Bear cleared his throat, and brought the meeting to order, standing on a chair at the little table Stephanie and D.J. shared. First, he checked to ensure Stephanie was still sleeping. It would really be a mad scramble if she awakened now. “All right, now as we all know, tomorrow is spring cleaning day. Which means it’s also the day when some of you will be going to help more needy boys and girls.”

“It’d be a shame to leave this place,” Rollie the Rhino uttered in a deep voice.

Mr. Bear grinned. “Well, Stephanie’s told me about a few of you who I know made the cut. However, I’d advise you all to remember that this isn’t about you, it’s about helping other kids.” He paused. He thought he heard footsteps in the hall. Pillow Person creeked open the door and peeked out with the corner of his...well, his head. Michelle was attempting to go potty; she’d called for her dad to get her. “Everything okay?”

“Yeah. If Michelle spots us, she’s young enough we can make her think it’s a dream,” Pillow Person said confidently. He had experience that Mr. Bear didn’t with toddlers.

“You’re good at that sort of thing, I imagine, being around D.J. when she was little.” Turning back to the crowd, he added that, “The key to this is sometimes just how a child thinks of you. It’s very rare that you become a real friend, not just a toy. Don’t think of being given away as the end of your career. It could be a great beginning.”

As he rambled on, and then answered questions, Mr. Bear considered that even before Pam’s accident, Stephanie had enjoyed him. But, she’d had other animal friends, too. In fact, even a few months after her dad’s best friend Joey and her Uncle Jesse moved in to help raise the girls, she’d been carrying a stuffed dog with a yellow ribbon named Alphabet - whom she called Alphie.

He turned to Alphie as he finished. Asking to speak to him privately, he told him “Alphie, Stephanie’s sort of forgotten about you.”

“I know. But, it could just be my time to move on,” the dog said with a shrug.

Mr. Bear smiled. He like this dog’s attitude. It was a humble, unassuming voice. The duty of an animal, as with a toy, was to facilitate enjoyment in children. Stephanie had had him since she turned five. And, Alphie knew it might just be time for a change.

Still, Alphie had been important in helping Stephanie after her mom’s death. “Look, I know the toys really don’t get a chance. But the way Stephanie is with me, I might be able to mutter something, and remind her to keep you here...if you want to stay.”

“Mr. Bear, you’re her best friend. Better than Harry, better than Allie, better than anyone.” He scratched behind an ear. “I’ve seen the way you work. You may not have a Hundred Acre Woods, but in some ways you’re better than Winnie the Pooh. And, I’d be proud to go to some other young kid who’s hurting, and say to myself ‘I served under the Master.’”

Mr. Bear blushed - as much as that was possible for a stuffed animal. “Well, I’d hate to see you go. I relied more on you than you could realize after their Mom died.”

Alphie raised his eyebrows as the others went back to their places. “Really?”

“Dogs are naturally loyal and understanding. Bears can be. But, look at my outfit. I’m a mystery-solving bear. I could just as easily have been Sherlock Holmes to some child’s Watson. Instead...” He smiled wistfully. “Instead I got to swim in a current of tears. I got to go through the whole grieving process with that girl. Sure, I helped. But, I couldn’t have done it without you.”

“Thanks.” They embraced. “Look at us, Mr. Bear. Over time, we become just like our owners, don’t we?”

“We certainly do.” Mr. Bear checked on the toys in Michelle’s room, then crawled back up into Stephanie’s clutches as she lay sleeping.

Spring cleaning day dawned as usual, with Mr. Bear sizing up the piles of toys which were being put in the corner. Stephanie informed him of what they were doing. As if we haven’t known for weeks, he thought to himself.

Suddenly, Michelle wandered into the girls’ room. He grinned. Maybe Michelle would take Alphie. He certainly hoped so. He hated to see that dog leave.

“Yikes,” he thought to himself. “Michelle wants me! She’s been after me ever since she could crawl.” He wasn’t used to children younger than about five at all. It was ironic that - even before Pam’s death - he was the target of affection for not one, but two children.

That wasn’t what he’d expected when he flashed that big grin, and Pam had picked him up for Stephanie. “Stephanie’s so curious, always asking questions like a little detective. Always talking about anything, really,” Pam had muttered to him - though most people would have thought it was to herself - at the hospital gift shop. “D.J.’s getting big, she’s gonna get a bracelet, but you look like you’re made just for Stephanie.” When he arrived at his new home, he found just what he expected. A bright, witty, charming child. Stephanie was a little younger than he’d pictured, but she was beyond her years in some ways. At age four, she could already read, for instance. Those first few months with Stephanie had been so much fun.

He sighed as he watched Michelle pick up a few little toys and animals. Alphie was not one of them. He hated to see that little dog go. But, he himself had come from a hospital gift shop. He knew there were many hurting kids. Maybe Alphie would go to one of them. And, he would move on without him. Indeed, Stephanie herself could help him.

He failed to notice Michelle until it was too late. The toddler was carrying him away, unseen by anyone else. He watched as she went downstairs with him. Michelle stopped for a moment and examined the bear’s outfit, making Mr. Bear very thankful. A toy’s job was to provide entertainment, and allow children to use their imagination. He wasn’t sure what he’d have done if she’d carried him off while going somewhere she shouldn’t. He supposed at her age he could have come alive for just an instant. It hadn’t happened often, but he’d heard stories, legends, really, from around the world. And, if he had to...

Someone was coming. Good, soon he would be back on Stephanie’s bed...oh no!

He fretted as he went into a very dark piano bench. He could just hear someone saying “there you are, Michelle” as she closed the lid and began pounding on the keys. He was thankful it wasn’t the oven. Michelle had put her shoes there several months before, according to Stephanie. But, still, it would be a very dull time. And, who knew how long he’d be there.

Mr. Bear shook his head. He sincerely hoped Alphie wouldn’t suffer the same fate. Lost and ignored for years.

Sometimes, you just want to make fun of something. There's a right and wrong way to joke around, just like you learned in school. You can have lots of fun without being vulgar, as this piece shows.

Basically, like some of my Elmo's world segments on www.muppetcentral.com, it takes something for little kids - in this case, a fairy tale - and puts a funny twist on it. Like Elmo thinking about speech pathology - then realizing he can't be b/c he doesn't know what that is :-) - this takes the three bears and puts a funny twist on it.

My good church friend is a huge Packers fan. His five-year-old nephew likes me to tell him stories when I'm there. Being creative, I have come up with a version of the Three Bears he loves; especially because it keeps changing and getting sillier. But, here is the general gist of (voice of NFL Films narrator)

The Real Story of Goldilocks and the Three Bears

Once upon a time there were three bears. There was the Papa Bear, a big, hulking, 300 pound linebacker. The Mama Bear, a running back with the moves to outmaneuver any defense. And a little Baby Bear kicker, because he hadn't grown big enough yet to actually play any other position.

One day, the Three Bears were getting ready to finish off a huge postgame spread - turkey, roast beef, pasta, and of course, porridge. With ice cream for dessert - if they're good. But, when it came time for them to sit down to eat, suddenly Papa Bear, in the middle of woofing down six racks of ribs, said "Thfporrbddooot...er, This porridge is too hot. See, kid, that's why you never talk with your mouth full."

Mama Bear said "My porridge is too hot, too." And Baby Bear said the same thing.

So, Papa Bear suggested they all go for a walk in the woods. And they would have made it back in time, except that upon leaving their home, they were met by hundreds of screaming autograph seekers. And, they stopped to sign every one.

Along came Goldilocks. Now this girl was assumed to have gold hair, but of course nobody really knows if Goldilocks had gold hair because she was constantly wearing her brightly colored Green Bay Packers helmet when out in public.

Well, Goldilcoks saw the postgame spread, and tasted Papa Bear's porridge. "This porridge is too hot," she declared, although she did help herself to a few dozen chicken wings.

She then tasted Mama Bear's porridge. "This porridge is too cold," she said.

When she got Baby Bear's porridge, though, it was just right. And she ate it, too.

Then, she went and had dessert. She tasted Papa Bear's ice cream. "This ice cream is too cold," she said. "It has little chunks of ice in it; it looks like the frozen tundra of God's Paradise on earth, historic Lambeau Field."

She then tasted the Mama Bear's Ice Cream. "This ice cream is too hot," she said as the last seconds ticked away and the final bit melted. (Of course, Mama Bear's other stuff was too cold, so it figured this would be too warm, since ice cream is supposed to be cold but porridge is supposed to be hot. That's how I explain if any kid asks.)

However, Baby Bear's ice cream was just right. She ate it all up - and then got a great big ice cream headache. "I need to sit down," she said as she held her head and gritted her teeth, the cold pounding at her brain.

She sat down in Papa Bear's chair, just under the picture of his papa, the original Papa Bear, George Halas. "This chair is too hard," Goldilocks said, taking a minute to get out of the chair because she was still pretty little, and it was the chair of a 300-pound Bear.

Then, she sat in Mama Bear's chair. "This chair is too soft," she said, though she did like the picture of Walter Payton above it. "There was an enemy that even us Packer fans could truly love," she said to herself.

Next, she sat in Baby Bear's chair. Suddenly, the bend but don't break defense that had allowed it to withstand thousands of bottoms for nearly four quarters broke. Like a herd of stampeding elephants, Goldilocks broke through that chair with incredible determination, shattering it into a million pieces as she crashed into the end zone...I mean as she crashed to the floor.

Having accomplished that task, she set her sights on a bed. She tried Papa Bear's bed, though, and said "this bed is too hard." Then she tested mama Bear's and it was too soft. Then, she got into Baby Bear's bed, put her Packers' helmet on the nightstand to cover up the bobblehead doll Baby Bear had sat there, and fell asleep.

Well, the Three Bears finally arrived home, their fingers numb from signing so many hats, t-shirts, and game programs, and finally decided to get into their postgame spread.

"Somebody's been eating my porridge," Papa Bear said.

"Somebody's been eating my chicken wings," Mama Bear said. "Oh, yeah, I guess they tasted the porridge, too."

Baby Bear then said, "Somebody ate all my porridge, and all my ice cream. Boy, if it's the same person who ate your chicken wings, Mama, she must really be tired. Maybe she's even sleeping in our beds," Baby Bear suggested.

Papa Bear shook his head. "Don't be silly, Baby Bear. That only happens in those dumb criminal stories like you hear on Paul Harvey's news and comments sometimes."

So, next they went into the living room. "Somebody's been sitting in my chair...ooh, they must have dropped some chicken when they came in here," Papa Bear said as he picked a piece off the chair. (Goldilocks had forgotten to wipe her hands; in fact, she never does in any version I know. But, I guess that's how Papa Bear knows she was sitting there.)

"Papa Bear, will please stop eating for a minute; somebody's been sitting in my chair, too," mama Bear complained.

"Somebody's been sitting in my chair, and broke it into a million pieces," Baby Bear sobbed, still thinking about the fact he didn't have any more ice cream either.

Next, they went upstairs. "Somebody's been sleeping in my bed," Papa Bear said.

"Somebody's been sleeping in my bed," Mama Bear said.

Baby Bear stared at Goldilocks for a second, that looked away. "Somebody's been sleeping in my bed, and she...hey! What kind of a dummy would put a Packer's helmet over my bobblehead doll!"

Upon hearing Baby Bear's complaint, Goldilocks was roused from a deep sleep. "Eeek! Bears!" she cried.

"Why did you put this...this abomination on top of my bobblehead doll," Baby Bear shouted.

"Goldilocks grabbed the Packers helmet in her arm, then twisted and swerved through the bedroom, juking and sidestepping with the grace of a ballerina, as she eluded the usually sure-handed tacklers of the ferocious Monsters of the Midway. In the blink of an eye, she had danced around the tacklers on her way to a sensational 85-yard touchdown...oh, wait, sorry. She ran out the door.

You can do comics? Yes, but you need to be careful. You have to decide when int he canon - here, the younger or older Sally in Peanuts, as she ages while other characters stay the same age. You then need to make things realistic - sure, like here, you can have Snoopy thinking things, or even use some imagination and have him on a date or something. Just don't have the laws of physics violated too bad (having Snoopy vaguely get 'something fromt he refrigerator" like here is fine Or, you can have it all Snoopy, and make it like one of his adventures w/the Red Baron or something, just don't mix and match.) When you do it right, you can come up with something like this:

Hope you like this. I've always loved Peanuts - they formed my first fanfics when I was knee high to a grasshopper than just drawing picture stories. I first had this idea years ago, after having to put a younger cousin in timeout. It's hard to put characters in really unusual situations for them, but I think I did okay. BTW, I actually beaned an on- deck hitter, too - in whiffleball.

DECISIOSN, DECISIONS

"Go to your room, young lady."

Sally Brown stared, disbelieving. "Big brother, you've never made a decision this fast in your life," she remarked.

"I know." He sighed. "I know. But, Mom and Dad left a note saying I'm in charge," he said, as he began to get more uncertain. "And what you did at school...well, I mean, you know better than...well, of course you do." He said more meekly, "You'll still go, won't you? I mean, you don't have to. Yes you do."

"All I did was throw a kickball at someone's head because they were being mean. The teachers didn't even see it," Sally cried.

"Yes. That's right. And you need to learn you can't do that! Sally, I've never thrown at a batter In my life," he exclaimed.

"You beaned the on-deck hitter once," Sally countered.

"Okay, I mean on purpose. Sally, that could have hurt, and you know it. Now, I know you're only in second grade. I'm not going to ground you....I don't think. Or maybe I should." He rubbed his chin.

"I can't believe my own big brother would punish me at all," Sally said. "You're usually nice."

Charlie Brown thought for a second. "Sally, I would never let a pitcher stay in the game who was throwing at someone's head. That is bad baseball, and it's just bad. Now, go!"

Sally was stunned that Charlie Brown, nine, had been as steadfast as he had. But, somehow, he was. She stormed off in a huff. And, the extremely blonde, round-headed kid stood in stunned silence. "Good grief. What have I done," he asked himself.

Just then, the phone rang. "Hello," Charlie Brown said as he answered.

"You better come over here. I think Linus has flipped," Lucy sneered. Linus, Lucy, and Rerun Van Pelt lived next to Charlie Brown and his family. Lucy was in Charlie Brown's class, while Linus was a grade lower. Rerun was in first grade.

"I can't. Mom and Dad left a note. They had to take Grandma to the hospital; she felt and broke her hip. And, I just sent Sally to her room for throwing a kickball at someone."

"You?!" Lucy burst out in a fit of laughter. "I'm sorry, ha, ha. I mean, just that idea that you, as wishy-washy as you are, would..." The laughter came again. "Oh, Charlie Brown, that's the funniest joke I've heard all year. The idea that you would have the courage to discipline someone is...well..."

Charlie Brown sighed. "Maybe you're right, Lucy. It was a mistake. I'll go let her out."

"Wait a minute, you blockhead. Don't tell me you're going to just let it slide."

"But you just said..."

"Never mind what I said. You need to show her who's boss. If I were you, I'd say no TV for a whole year! And no dessert, either! She has to learn to be nice," Lucy exclaimed.

"Fine, I'll think about that. Thanks." Charlie Brown hung up, and opened the door. His dog, Snoopy, had knocked at it. The beagle walked in carrying his supper dish. "Good grief, Snoopy. I'm taking advice on teaching someone to be nice from an eternal crab. And, I still don't know what Linus is doing."

Meanwhile, over in the Van Pelt household, Linus was putting tape on his blanket, and taking it off. Rerun was gazing at him in amazement while tearing off pieces of tape. Lucy walked in from the kitchen.

"What did Charlie Brown say?" Linus asked her.

"He has his own problems. You and that stupid blanket," Lucy complained, letting the thought hang.

"I thought you wanted him to get rid of it," Rerun said. "You said you didn't like that he always carried it."

"Getting rid of it does not mean writing all over it and framing it on the wall!"

Linus ingored Lucy. "Now, John 3:16 is a little longer. It would make a nice centerpice; the letters wouldn't be too big. But, it might almost be too many letters, unless I get a really big frame."

"Why don't you just print the whole Bible on the blanket, if you want to write all over it?"

"Because, Lucy, then I wouldn't be able to read the words late at night." He looked back at Rerun. "Although, that gives me a thought. What if I put two or three verses on there? Tear off some more tape. Put some on top here, and some on the bottom here."

Charlie Brown absent-minded pulled out a can after setting Snoopy's dish on the table. He opened the can, and began pouring. "What should I do, Snoopy? I mean, is Sally going to be mad at me now? Should I make the punishment more or less if she talks mean? I mean, I can understand, I don't like getting sent to my room for a timeout. And, I've never punished anyone anyway. Did I even do it right?" he asked as he sat the dish in front of Snoopy. "Should I have just said 'no TV' right away instead?"

Snoopy looked stoic.

"Oh, sorry, Snoopy. I gave you green beans by misake." Charlie Brown picked up the dish and emptied it. He got another can out, opened it, and emptied its contents into Snoopy's dish as he spoke. "I don't like to say no going outside at all. I think this is too little to say she's grounded for a week or anything. But, what am I saying? Who am I to judge? And, she might suggest that, anyway. Or is she remorseful? Or, maybe shes ready to run away. After all, she almost left school one day in first grade, except she forgot her locker combintion. I'll tell you, having a sister is hard work," he said as he put the meal in front of Snoopy.

Snoopy looked questionsingly at the dish.

"Oh, what am I doing, Snoopy? I gave you carrots this time." As he sat the dish back up, the phone rang. "Hello?"

"Charlie Brown, guess what?" Linus sighed. "I decided on several Bible verses on security that I think are my favorites. I'm ready to write them on my blanket and frame it." He blinked. "It's a weird feeling, Charlie Brown. But, I think I'm ready for this."

"Great, hey, listen. I had to send Sally to her room for throwing a kickball at someone's head. I need to know what you think? What should I say to her? How should I act? How will she act?"

"Well, I think the first thing you need to say to her is the Golden Rule. 'Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.'" Linus slapped his forehead. "Of course, that verse would be perfect framed. Rerun, put the markers away, we're not coloring on that blanket yet!" He left the phone. After about a minute, Lucy got on the line. "You blockhead!" she screamed. "I don't know what you said to Linus, but we were this close to losing that dumb blanket and at leaast having it framed. But, now he's going to keep carrying it! I hope you're satisfied!" She slammed down the receiver.

"What a weird day. Snoopy, did you..." He looked around. Finally, he saw Snoopy leave with something from the refrigerator. "Well, he might as well. I'm too distracted to pour dog food."

He walked into Sally's room next. He saw her looking forlorn. She sat on her bed with her head in her hands. He sat besides her and sighed. What was he supposed to say? How did one start such a conversation?

"You know better," was the first thing that came out of his mouth. He winced. Not only was that a dumb thing to say - even if he hadn't said it earlier - but he could tell from her face she didn't need a lecture.

"Oh, I suppose you're going to yell at me, too? Why don't you just stop being my big brother, you Benedict Arthur," she said bitterly.

"Sally, I know how you feel. It probably doesn't feel that much different than when Mom or Dad sends us." She shook her head. "The truth is, being a pitcher, I might have been more upset then they would."

"I wondered how you had guts to do that," Sally admitted

"True. I think I was thinking about that. People have been killed by baseballs, Sally. You could have hurt that kid very seriously. I'm sure you were upset. But, there is never a reason to throw anything at anyone. Understand?" She nodded.

Charlie Brown gave her a brief hug. "Benedict Arthur, huh? You know, you don't like all the hard work of learning. But, you've tried to be nice at school. That's saved you a couple times, the reputation you have of being good and listening well. But, if you let yourself get carried away like that again, when soemthing really bad happens, you might not be so lucky. We need to be a team. I'll help you, but you need to help me, and be good. Okay?"

"Okay." Sally grinned. "That really wasn't too bad of a lecture."

"Really? I wasn't even trying. Look, I don't feel right making this decision."

"You mean, you're so wishy-washy you can't?"

'That too. You either have to write a letter of apology, or you get no TV today."

Sally thought for a minute. "Writing is what I would have to do at school. Do you think I want to write?" She sighed, and spoke forlornly. "I probably should though, huh? You're right. Mom and Dad have taught us well. That was mean, and I know it. Just leave me alone here. I'll be done in a little bit."

Linus and Lucy met Charlie Brown and Sally along a brick wall early in the evening. Linus was still carrying his security blanket. "Couldn't give that up, could you?" Charlie Brown said.

"Not yet. I'm down to 3,122 verses that I'd want on it. So, how did it go with Sally?"

"Fine. Mom and Dad said I handled things perfectly. The timeout, giving her a choice of punishments, everything worked well. I think the letter shows she really thought about what she'd done. My dad was even surprised I had the guts to do what I did."

"Dad showed me what can happen if you get bleeding in your brain," Sally said. "He let me look in a book. It's called a mannerism. I'll never throw at anyone again. Mannerisms are scary."

"Especially mannerisms involving carrying or framing security blankets." Lucy harrumphed. "Who would ever put favorite Bible verses on a security blanket?"

"I don't know, but one thing's for sure. When I get older, I want to be just like my big brother," Sally said. "Except, I'd really like to be more successful at..."

Lucy knew she wanted to say it. "Come on, admit it. Everything."

Sally didn't want to be as harsh as Lucy. And, now she wanted to show how good she could be, too. "Well, especially pitching. Big brother, how about letting me pitch sometime? I promise, I won't throw anywhere near the batter's head. You're right. Throwing inside is fine, but we don't want to hurt anyone."

Charlie Brown sighed. He didn't like giving up his favorite position. But, if it would let his sister see that he had confidence in her being good, he would let her. "Sure. I guess it is boring to pitch when you're behind 20-0 With our team, I'm sure you'll get plenty of chances."

I don't have room to post a 25000_ word story, but I will give you a link to a Cheers one I wrote back in '97 when I still knew the show. http://www.fanfiction.net/s/1476436/1/ This is a good example of how to expand a story while putting the characters in a unique spot - it aalso is a good example of the alternate universe, as it covers a time when sam has a very good career and frazier owns the bar.

The keys to this are, don't write a little,, post, then forget about it. Writing soemthing this long takes lots of work, and it needs to be all ready, or almost so, before you start posting, or readers lose patience fast.

She sighed as she sat the phone down, and told him what happened. "Did I do the right
thing, Uncle Jesse? I mean, I just gave up on a friendship, just because...she was..." She closed
her eyes for a second, unsure of what to think or say.

Jesse sat beside her and put his arm around her. "Yeah, you did. I'm proud of you. Deej,
sometimes we have to take a stand. And, the most painful thing of all is when that stand affects
our relationships. But, those who do split apart from us are going to realize we're different, and
that we were right someday. And, they can't realize that while we're on the same slippery slope
they are. There's lots of times when someone makes a few mistakes, or is just a little weird like
Kimmy. Even though we tease her a lot, someone like Kimmy needs someone like you. But,
someone like Kathy, that's the kind where, sometimes they need us to totally break away from
them."

"Thanks, Uncle Jesse. I just don't like the idea of losing touch with someone I've known since
first grade," D.J. complained.

"I know how you feel. There's one or two daredevil guys I had to break apart from because
they started drinking, and cussing, and stuff like that. I may have been Dr. Dare in high school,
but I lived a clean life, and I wasn't going to let anyone drag me into temptation. It hurt, but I
know I did the right thing."

"Thanks." They embraced. "Hey, we better get down to that party."

"Yeah, right now the band's just The Rippers. What kind of a name is that?" Jesse joked.
Stephanie finished her story by explaining that, "Kathy had her baby that fall. D.J. went to the
baby shower, but they've hardly spoken since the birth, and not at all after graduation." She
considered that the friendship might have stood a chance if Kathy had given the baby up for
adoption. But, then again, if Jesse and Becky's offer to take him had been accepted, a lot of other
things might also have never happened, especially the bitter rivalry between Stephanie and the
Flamingoes.

Michelle nodded slowly, looking a little downcast. "I hope that doesn't happen to any of my
friends. I don't think it's happening yet, but we're only in sixth grade."

"I know. So, you can tell I'm apprehensive about babysitting for Kathy. What would you
suggest?" Stephanie didn't know if Michelle would have any ideas. But, she always had such a
unique outlook on things, and was able to help quite a bit at times. They had become very close
since Michelle's accident several years earlier.

Michelle rubbed her chin for a moment. "D.J.'s always been committed to waiting for that
stuff. And, she and Dad and all the others taught you, right?" Stephanie nodded. "Is that why
you have that card taped to you diary?"

"My True Love Waits' pledge card? Yep, I...hey, have you been reading my diary!?"
Michelle grinned sheepishly. "Well anyway, sometime in the near future, I'm going to give you a
pledge card all your own. It's in a secret hiding place right now. And that day, you and D.J. and
I can talk all about those dreams we've got - and that I hope you have - of our wedding days, and
the wonderful times to follow," Stephanie declared excitedly.

"Super. Thanks, Steph!" Michelle still didn't totally understand, but she knew that it was
something important, and that Stephanie was dedicated enough to it to have signed a card and
taped it to her diary.

However, Michelle had one concern. "But, who's going to teach Kathy's kid?"

"Well...I don't know," Stephanie said with a frown.

"If Kathy's still like that, maybe you need to."

"Hmmm, I never thought of that. You know, Michelle, you really have ways of getting to the
heart of a problem sometimes. Thanks," Stephanie said with a smile, rising and mussing
Michelle's hair a little.

Stephanie Tanner showed up at Kathy's door with small butterflies flapping in her stomach.
She hesitated, then rang the doorbell.

As she studied the home, the butterflies became more intense. It was rather clean, so she
wasn't too concerned. However, .

As the door opened, she couldn't help but think of the girl she'd seen...well, much less well
dressed than she was now, that was for certain. She didn't know what to say.

"Hey, Stephanie, glad you could make it," Kathy said in a frazzled voice.

As she showed Stephanie in, the sitter had lots of questions. The fact there weren't two or
three more little ones besides the one conceived at D.J.'s party relieved her somewhat, but the
place was a pretty big mess.

"Hi, Stephanie," spoke a boy, slightly over four years old. He was obviously well cared for,
but it was equally obvious that Kathy had little time to do much about her house.

Oh well, Stephanie thought, at least she seems to know her kid's the most important thing.

"Hey, Scott, right? I've heard a lot about you."

"My Mommy said her and your sister useta be friends."

Stephanie bit her lip. How would she explain this to him. It had been a long time ago. And,
D.J. really showed little interest. The next move was clearly up to Kathy.

Still, though, "She...might like to be again. I don't know. I guess...it's up to your mom." She
laughed for a minute. She'd blurted out something that - if Scott were anything like Michelle at
pestering people at times - would put Kathy far more on the spot than she'd intended.

Kathy tried to avoid thinking the many thoughts going through her head about D.J.. She
simply said, "Phone numbers are on the refrigerator, Scott usually has a light snack before
bedtime. If he's really naughty just send him to bed right away- I doubt you'll have that problem,
though. He's Dennis the Menace at times, but he really is good overall."

"Oh, I'm very familiar with the Dennis kind," Stephanie said with a smile. She considered
that, with their dad being so lenient, Michelle had, at times when little, been a little like Dennis.
But, also like Dennis, she was really sweet and good-natured - and compliant when she knew her
boundaries. After all, even the wilder Dennis knew to stay in the corner when sent. "Our sister
Michelle was very good at testing limits when she was his age. Maybe not so much as Dennis,
but of course, Dennis is a boy, and they're usually more ornery and boisterous, so if you're talking
about a girl Dennis..." Stephanie laughed. "Sorry, I'm sure you have to get going."

"You know, I can remember when D.J. and I were in grade school, and I'd come over there to
play. You haven't changed, Stephanie. You're still the same girl D.J. and Kimmy and I used to
call Motor mouth Tanner.' I remember when you were four, maybe five, your dad once said
you'd have your own talk show. Then your mom joked that the problem was, the guests would
never have a chance to say anything." Stephanie laughed. "Well, I better get going," Kathy said,
reliving those wonderful years. Where had the time gone?

Scott, of course, had been listening in. "Do you have a talk show, Stephanie? Can I see it?
What's a talk show?"

"As you can see, he's at the stage where he asks a million questions. See you later." She
hugged and kissed him. "Be good for Stephanie. I love you." The tender embrace made
Stephanie feel much better about the situation.

As Stephanie expected, Michelle was up waiting for her. Michelle put down the book she was
reading and quickly asked, "How did it go?"

"Great...you were right. Thanks. Is D.J. up?"

"She's in college, Steph. Is she ever not up?"

"Good point." Stephanie walked over to D.J.'s room. "Hey, Deej. Can I ask you
something?"

"As long as it doesn't have any medical aspects, go ahead?" she said with a sight, not even
bothering to take the pen out of her hand before resting her head in it.

Stephanie could tell D.J. needed a study break. She didn't know if this would provide one or
not. She explained about babysitting for Scott, and then said, "You know, Kathy really seemed to
have changed. I mean, she's nothing like Mom was. But, she's still a good mother. Her house
isn't in the best of shape, but neither are the dorm rooms of the kids who live on campus."

"You've got that right." D.J. sighed, and put her pen down. "Steph, you know what she did
at my party."

"I know. I told Michelle the whole story, but she suggested I go, anyway, to babysit. And,
she was right."

"She told me. Even she thought you might have to be the good influence on Scott that her
mother couldn't be."

"True. But, Kathy is being a good influence on him. The boy I babysat tonight has a mother
who made a big mistake. But, I can tell she at least tries. And, I don't think she'd let anyone
around Scott that would cause him harm, emotionally or otherwise."

"Good."

"She also wanted to say she was sorry. And, before Dad picked me up, she said she wants to
get back together with you." Stephanie grinned. She was always honest enough that she
wouldn't have much trouble saying something like that.

D.J. was troubled. She knew she should forgive her. But, while the memory had faded of her
sixteenth birthday party, she also didn't want to be around someone who would do something like
that. And, while Stephanie hadn't seen any evidence of problems, she also knew that Kathy might
still not be as stable as some parents would be.

"So, how about it, Deej? I'm babysitting for her again next Friday? Why don't you come?"

D.J. was about to ask how Stephanie would feel if that happened at her sixteenth. But, she
and her friends had had arguments over boys before, and Stephanie and Darcy had even broken
their friendship off a couple times for very brief spans. In a way, Stephanie had learned to become
very forgiving, especially since Michelle's accident. Maybe she need to do that, too.

"I guess it's time to see her again. She probably isn't too bad of an influence anymore huh?"

"Nope, you know I know the kinds of things to look for," Stephanie said. Sensing a little
uncertainty still, she added, "I could always send Michelle in to pester you to do it."

"Please, Steph, with the amount of work I have, I'd do anything before I had to have that."
The sisters laughed.

That Friday, the sisters purposely left early for Kathy's. D.J. was still uncertain, even after
Stephanie had reassured her, of what she'd find. Even in their smaller high school, she'd heard of
a number of cases of girls becoming pregnant. And, some of them did so because they were
involved in much worse things than just that.

"It's weird, usually you'd be the one asking me for help," D.J. said.

"Well, don't feel too bad, that'll come soon enough. After what you said about Dad and
Uncle Jesse trying to teach you, I've decided you'll be the one to help me get my drivers' license.
My first lesson can be tomorrow if you want."

D.J. managed a weak chuckle. "Fine. Just don't drive anywhere near a kitchen, and I'll be
calm."

"Right, no kitchens."

Kathy opened the door at that moment. A weak hello emerged from their lips. The
awkwardness was similar to the last time they talked to each other. Kathy had told D.J. she was
glad Michelle had recovered from her riding accident, and D.J. had uttered a weak thank you.

Scott rushed to the door with a couple toy cars. "Come look at the parking lot I've got set
up," he insisted.

Stephanie turned to D.J. and Kathy. "I'll let you two talk for a minute." She then walked
toward the massive array of cars. "Scott, that's not a realistic parking lot - in a real one there is
always at least one car which takes up two or more spaces," she joked.

"She's a really nice sitter." Kathy snickered. "At least she lets her charges talk. Unlike when
we'd have her babysit our dolls."

"Yep. Our dad has some funny videos of that." D.J. gazed at Steph and Scott playing on the
floor. She was really glad to see that everything was...well, as messy as any dorm room would be.
Her dad would throw a fit, but Danny Tanner was always a neat freak.

"Look, Steph probably told you...I'm sorry for the way things have gone."

D.J. blinked once. "Yeah, me too."

"If you'd wanted to talk...I would have been there. You know, about Michelle. Scott was at
the age when emergency room trips are not unusual."

"Tell me about it. I committed to nursing last year. Had a round in pediatrics last semester."
D.J. began to ask what Kathy was doing with her life, then hesitated. Would Kathy feel right
saying she was just a homemaker? And, a single, struggling one at that - she could tell the
clothing and some household items looked to be from places like the Salvation Army. Certainly
not what they dreamed about growing up.

Kathy, fortunately, spoke next. "That sounds like a fun profession."

"It is." Inside, D.J. studied the surroundings more. She began to wish she'd helped Kathy a
little more in the last four years. Sure, Kathy had caused her own problems. But, that didn't
mean she couldn't have helped her a little.

D.J. finally spoke. "Kathy...I'm sorry. It's just so hard coming here. I mean, we just wasted
years being upset..."

"I know. I'm sorry. I've thought about you, too, but...I don't know, sometimes what the
Flamingoes would do fighting her over boys and things wasn't all my younger sister; in fact, most
of it wasn't. But, still, maybe how they fought Stephanie, too, made me wonder if you could ever
be friends with me again."

"Kathy..." D.J. and Kathy gazed at each other for a moment, unsure of what to say. "It might
have been hard, but all your sister ever did was try to steal our dad's phone card for you." D.J.
chuckled. That seemed so little now. When it had happened, though, D.J. figured for sure that
Kathy had gone over to the "dark side," as it were - just like those friends of Jesse's who started
drinking and cussing, and who basically had told him he had to go along with them, because they
weren't going to do the clean stuff he wanted to do.

Now, howevfer, Kathy's actions seemed pretty small, especially since no harm had been done.
As for the other Famingoes, "Well, Steph and her friends have started to be friends with the
Flamingoes. They've had a truce, so...I guess we should, too."

"Yeah." They embraced. "I'm sorry, D.J.."

"I know. Me, too."

D.J. and Kathy looked into each others' eyes, remembering those wonderful days, long ago,
when they were in grade school. They shared a tender chuckle, as Stephanie had broken into one
of her famous rambles - Scott had said something about one of his cars, and now Stephanie was
commenting about the many odd things that BMW could stand for.

"Some thins never change, huh, Kathy?"

"Nope, Motor mouth Tanner' is still the same."

"Look, I know you're probably anxious to get going. But, maybe tomorrow, we can meet for
pizza. I've got a student driver who will probably want to go there, anyway."

Kathy was amazed. "Stephanie's going to be driving? Oh, boy, that just sounds so unreal."

"Doesn't it, though? Michelle babysitting, though - that's the really weird one. I mean, I
practically was an assistant at times when she was a toddler and preschooler, since our dad could
be pretty lax at times. She's helped a lot with Uncle Jesse and Aunt Becky's kids, but this will be
the first time it's just her there. Dad says it'll happen in the next month or two." D.J. sighed.
"There's another area I really could have helped you with," she said with a frown. "At least I had
some experience helping to teach Michelle soem things."

"Hey, I'm always open to help when it comes to Scott."

"Great. Well, I'll see you tomorrow about two or so?" She nodded. "Great. Bye, Kathy."

"So long, D.J.," she said with a smile.

Michelle had been taken by their dad to a high school football game, which she'd attended
with Cassie, Mandy, and several others. Danny and Michelle picked Stephanie up on the way
home.

"So, how did it go?" Michelle asked quickly.

Stephanie grinned knowingly. "First I want to know if you had fun watching Jeff."

"What do you mean, Steph? His older brother's the one who was playing." Stephanie stifled
giggles. "I'm serious, Steph."

"Tell you sister what you kept calling him, though."

Michelle blushed slightly. "Okay, I kept calling him Jeff. In fact, I called our quarterback and
a couple other players for our team that when I cheered for them."

Stephanie roared with laughter. "This is it, Michelle. It's meg-crush land."

"Come on, Steph. I...boy, my cheeks feel warm. I must really be blushing."

"Yep. Better be careful you're not the one to ditch all your friends in favor of going boy
crazy," Stephanie warned.

Michelle shook her head. "I would never do that, Steph." Danny didn't think Kathy had
planned to, either. "Well, yeah, Dad, but she didn't have older sisters like Steph and D.J. to look
out for her."

"That's true. You girls always do such a good job with Michelle, Steph," he was quick to
compliment her.

Once she thanked him, Stephanie heard Michelle ask how Kathy and D.J.'s reunion went.

"It went really well. They're getting back together, and I think they might start to be good
friends again." Stephanie smiled.

Michelle grinned happily. "That's great. Still, it's a shame they fought for so long," she said
more lowly.

"It is. But, the important thing about friendship is that true friendship stands the test of time.
And, maybe what D.J. did had to be done; maybe it was the key to Kathy getting better at first.
But, true friends like that get back together. Because the friendship is more important than any
boy or anything else. That might come between them."

Kathy Santoni looked up from the floor. "Oh no. Please, don't tell anyone."

"You better hope we don't all find out in about nine months," Stephanie cracked.

"What does that mean?" Michelle asked.

"We'll explain later," Stephanie said. She quickly turned Michelle around while keeping her
right hand clasped over Michelle's eyes. As they walked back upstairs and closed the door,
Stephanie instructed Michelle, "Go find D.J. and get her to go down to the recording studio right
away. I need to go get Dad."

"You want D.J. to get my panda?"

"Just go!" Stephanie ordered as she ran upstairs.

Michelle ran into the living room and grabbed D.J.'s pants. "D.J., Steph says you have to go
to the recording studio right away."

"What?" D.J. grumbled as she was led away by Michelle. "Can't Stephanie handle whatever's
down there?" she asked, thinking Michelle imagined a monster was down there.

"I don't know, it must be scary. It looked weird. Then, she covered my eyes."

"I'll be back, guys. This better not be a trick, Michelle." D.J. said as Michelle led her to the
door, then opened it.

Meanwhile, Stephanie burst into Danny's room. "Dad, you need to come quick."

Danny rose quickly and exclaimed, "Why what happened?'

"Well, let's just say that I tried to cover Michelle's eyes fast enough, but after what was
happening in the recording studio, I think you're going to have to explain the birds and the bees."

"I've never seen your dad run so fast," Becky said a second later, as both felt the breeze from
Danny's running.

D.J. had ordered Michelle to go up to her room and wait. She saw her Dad breathlessly
running to the top of the stairs leading to the recording studio, and held up a hand. "Can I have a
minute to lecture them first?" she asked, trying to conceal her anger.

"Be my guest," Danny said haltingly, still trying to find words.

D.J. fumed as she glared at Kathy and her boyfriend. "I come down here because my baby
sister tells me to, and I think she's just wanting me to find her bear or something! Instead, what
do I find, Kathy?! You shamelessly and selfishly using my Sweet Sixteen party to...to...I don't
even want to say it! I can't believe how you would destroy a friendship so treacherously! This is
my moment of glory, and all you can do is..." She paused for a moment, and shouted, "Get the
rest of your clothes on, and get out of here! I never want to see you around here again, after
what you did to my party!" D.J. screamed tearfully. Danny hugged her as she began sobbing.
"It's your turn, Dad," she mumbled.

Danny sighed. "I don't think I have anything I can add right now."

Back in the living room, Kimmy looked around after several minutes. "Huh, now D.J.'s
disappeared."

She walked into the kitchen, only to see Kathy and her boyfriend leaving. "Kathy, where were
you? Where are you going?"

"Oh...we just thought we'd go for a drive," Kathy said absently.

Kimmy couldn't tell she was lying. "Oh, well, okay. Glad you came. I'm going to look for
D.J. now." She walked upstairs to see if D.J. was in her room.

She found Danny comforting a tearful D.J. as they sat on her bed. "Hey, Deej, what's
wrong?" She sat on the other side of D.J., and placed a hand on her back.

"Kathy and her boyfriend, that's what's wrong. They said they came to celebrate my party,
but they disappeared so fast after they came. And, when I found them, they were down in the
recording studio just..." She shook her head. "I hope she does have a baby! She deserves to
have to struggle through life after this," D.J. ranted. "This is supposed to be the biggest night of
my life, my sixteenth birthday party."

"Whoa baby. You mean they were actually...?" Kimmy was shocked. As crazy as Kimmy
was, she would never have dreamed of doing anything like that. She placed a hand on D.J.'s.
"Wow. It sounds like both of our Sweet Sixteens have been real bummers, huh?" D.J. nodded.

"Now, Deej," Danny said, "it's true that what they did was very wrong. But, we don't know
what they were thinking. They might have come with all intentions of honoring you, and they just
got carried away."

D.J. wiped tears from her eyes. "Yeah? Well, why did they have to do it here? Why couldn't
they have done it in their car even? You and Mom did it at a ball park!"

"Well, in the car, actually. We were just so in the mood, and the wait for traffic to let up was
so long anyway. It's true you couldn't have walked in the way we did it that evening, but even
doing it in a parking lot, I can remember telling Pam it seemed like something Jesse would do."

"You and Mom really loved each other. You knew what was right, and when to do that," D.J.
mumbled, trying hard to think of something other than what Kathy had done. Forget "Sixteen
Candles" - the theme song of this party was becoming, "It's My Party, and I'll Cry If I Want To."

Danny remembered that he had to comfort his daughter, so he stopped rambling and got back
on the subject. "We sure did. But, you're right, what they did was awful. This was your night,
and it was so full of good fun for kids your age." Danny shook his head. "It almost makes me
wish I'd let Kimmy host the party."

"Hey, believe me, Mr. T., I would never allow people to do that. Making out's one thing,
but..." Kimmy whistled. "Good thing Blondo and Blondo Jr. didn't see it."

"I'm afraid they did. I think we're going to have to explain all about that now." He sighed.
"I'd been hoping to wait and gradually tell her over the next three, five, maybe ten years. I'll
understand if you can't help, Deej. Aunt Becky's here, she'll be able to help like she did when
Steph was asking questions."

"Thanks, Dad. Maybe in a few minutes, before I go back down," D.J. muttered. "I just need
some time to talk with Kimmy."

"Okay." He hugged her and left.
Back in the present, Michelle's eyes lit up. "Kathy sounds like a Flamingo."

"If we hadn't grown closer to the Flamingoes on our trip last summer, I know Darcy, Allie,
and I would have never gotten this call. Kathy's younger sister's the one who tried to get me
involved in that group in the first place, so they could steal Dad's phone card and Kathy could call
her boyfriend once he moved across the country. Now that we're in high school, things are a little
calmer between all of us." Stephanie hummed. "I'm just not sure if I can stomach seeing her
now, let alone learning who Kathy might have around. Do you have any advice, Michelle?"

"Maybe. First, let me hear the end of the story. I remember you guys all telling me about that
stuff," Michelle revealed.

"Okay, you're right. Dad asked what you'd seen, you asked a bunch of questions, and D.J.
did come in a while later," Stephanie said as she continued her story.
Michelle was sitting on her bed looking at an anatomy book. It was quite intriguing. But,
Stephanie, Allie, Danny, and Becky could tell she was still a little skeptical, and very grossed out.

"Do you have any more questions, Michelle?" Becky asked.

"I still don't believe I'm going to lay eggs someday," Michelle responded.

"It's not laying eggs, Michelle," Stephanie said in an exasperated tone.

"It's okay, Steph. This is pretty far over her head, at this age. But, now you understand what
you saw, right, honey?" Danny asked. Michelle nodded. "And why it's only something for a
Mommy and a Daddy to do, when they're ready to have babies?"

"Is Kathy really going to have a baby now?" Michelle asked. "That's gross."

"We know it looks that way to you. And, that's good, at your age." Danny patted her hand.
"When you get older, and get married, that's when it's special. It was always very special and fun
for your Mom and I. We don't know if the seed got into Kathy and connected with an egg or
not."

"It could have, though. That's why I made that joke about all of us finding out in nine
months," Stephanie explained.

A light bulb seemed to come on above Michelle's head. She finally understood that part.

"You also should never tell your friends any of this. It's something for parents or, in your
case, aunts and big sisters to help their parents explain," Becky added.

"Yes, when they're much, much, much older," Danny said.

Michelle spoke as D.J. entered the room. "They wouldn't believe it, anyway."

"I'm going back down to my party now. How are you doing, Michelle?"

"Okay. But, I'd rather be playing Candyland."

"Did you wait till you were married, Dad?" Stephanie inquired.

"Yes, I did. I wanted my wedding night to be the most special time possible, and so did your
mom. Because we each planned to share our bodies only with someone who meant so much to us
that we were determined to be together till death," Danny said wistfully.

"See, Michelle, that's another reason why what Kathy did was so selfish," D.J. said as Uncle
Jesse entered with the cordless phone. "She only thought about how she could please herself, not
about how what she did now would spoil the fun of that wedding night and beyond with her
husband years down the road."

"Hey, speaking of that, Kathy's on the phone for you, Deej," Jesse said.

"Tell her I don't want to talk to her," D.J. complained.

"Don't you think you should at least hear what she has to say?" Jesse countered.

Danny could tell D.J. was about to refuse. "Look, honey, what she did was wrong. And, I
really think you're right to not want her around here anymore. But, she deserves a chance to be
heard. Because she needs to know that her mistake isn't the end of the world, even if it does
result in a baby."

D.J. sighed deeply. "Oh, okay." She walked out of the other bedroom into her own and said
hello in a tired voice.

"D.J., look; I just wanted to apologize," Kathy said.

"Hey, look, it's not the end of the world if you're pregnant," D.J. said briskly.

"D.J., please. I haven't even thought about that. Although, if it did happen, I'd at least want
you to come to my baby shower," Kathy related.

"Is this really that small a thing to you, Kathy? You act like it's no big deal, and you're talking
about some movie night you're going to host in a few months. Well, it is a big deal! Because you
could not only wind up with a baby and having to drop out of school, you could have some
terrible disease. You could even have gotten AIDS! We used to be good friends in grade school,
Kathy." D.J. sighed and frowned mightily. "And I don't like what's happened to you."

"D.J., look...first of all, this wasn't our first time. When we're together, my boyfriend and I
just get too caught up. We don't stop to think. But, when you kicked us out, I started to
think...maybe we should start to think about you a little. I wouldn't have wanted someone to use
my Sweet Sixteen party for their own lusts."

"Thank you, Kathy, for using that word for me. Because it's not love you and he feel." D.J.
grumbled. "But, that just means that you're not thinking about the future at all. And, you haven't
since Junior High."

"Look, I'm really sorry, D.J.. I know it really isn't fair. I don't expect things to get any
worse, but maybe if I do become pregnant, things will change. It hasn't happened yet, though,"
Kathy said defensively.

"Yeah, well it could! It might have happened in the last few weeks, or maybe even tonight."
D.J. closed her eyes and thought for a second. "I'll come to your baby shower if you have one.
But, you have to promise not to be doing that with him, and not to be around here. I won't have
my sisters being influenced to be like that!"

"Well, if that's the way it has to be, D.J., goodbye. I'll let you know if there's a baby shower,
just so you can come and...wish me luck." The phone clicked.

D.J. stared at it in disbelief for a second, not realizing that Uncle Jesse was standing in front of
her.

Especially with Hogan's Heroes or M*A*S*H or another liek that, there will be times you want to go higher than G (or K like on fanfiction.net).
If you do, don't torture your main characters more than is needed. There's no excuse for assaults and other things that aren't in the course of business for someone int hat situation. That means if you live int he inner city and see lots of crime, you stil *cannot* have it happening willy-nilly to *maain* characters unless it's a situationt hat would see it happen. Yes, you can write about the Gestapo getting Colonel Hogan. But *never* show a child as the victim if it's a main charactger.

(For an excellent series about a child who is neglected some, but that doens't get too angsty, just enough to make it realistic, see the awesome "Sam Series" by RKORadio on www.fanfiction.net. It's worth all the reading from the first story on through if you like Full Hous or even if you've never watched FH. It's book universe so it's a little nicer, more in control girls.)

Of course, you can have the mainc haracters affected by bad things if they aren't too bad - and get a little creative - just by taking things in the show sometimes. This is a story I wrote about a friend of D.J.'s who got pregnant - and you'll see that there's a lot of leeway, and you don't have to be graphic to have an effect:

You know, we never get to see D.J.'s Sweet Sixteen party on the show. Given the date of
Kathy Santoni's baby shower, though, it's quite possible she conceived around the time of D.J.'s
sixteenth birthday. Which, combined with othter problems, would explain why Kathy was never
heard from again, and could have really made it a...

SWEET AND SOUR SIXTEEN

Stephanie Tanner, fifteen, frowned as she set down the phone receiver. Michelle, her
eleven-year-old sister, walked into the room they shared.

"Hey, Steph, why the long face?" Michelle wanted to know.

"Well, you know how my friends and I have this babysitting business?"

Michelle nodded at the odd question - which when she was a toddler would have produced a
"duh." She was glad to be broken of that habit now. "Of course. You've had it for a couple
years," she declared. "I ve even helped you."

Stephanie paused, considering the history behind the person she'd just been discussing with her
friends. "Well, Michelle, we got a call from a woman who needs us. And, the other babysitters
are busy."

"I can do it if you can't," Michelle offered. She knew she was only allowed to assist yet.
However, she knew it was worth a try.

Stephanie almost was willing to let Michelle do it - the woman had sounded desperate, and it
would be a good reference, outside their usual group of referrals. However, this was a single
mother. And, Stephanie was a little unsure about the mother, or what or who might be around
the home.

"It's not that I don't have time. It's just that...well, D.J. kind of always warned me about the
girl," Stephanie hedged. D.J. was their older sister, now twenty.

"What about her?"

"Do you remember the name Kathy Santoni?" Michelle shook her head. She seemed totally
clueless. "It's okay, I understand. You may have never heard the actual name. But, D.J. says
almost the last time she heard from her, four years ago, was at her baby shower. And...well, sit
down. Let me tell you a story." She patted the bed beside her.

Michelle eagerly sat beside her sister on Stephanie's bed. Michelle, who'd recently turned
eleven, loved hearing stories about teenagers. And, from the way Stephanie was hesitating, this
one might have things in it that their dad really didn't like for her to hear; which would be fun, as
long as she was hearing it from one of her sisters. She would feel safe, then. "Tell away, Steph!"
she ordered enthusiastically.

"Well, you might remember the resulting talk. Anyway, it all started as D.J.'s Sweet Sixteen
party neared." And, as Stephanie spoke, Michelle's mind drifted back to a time more than four
and a half years before....
"Guess what, Deej," Kimmy Gibbler announced almost before she got into her best friend's
kitchen door. Kimmy was a girl of sixteen with rather...unusual tastes.

D.J. Tanner looked excitedly at her friend. She was in the kitchen with her younger sisters,
eleven-year-old Stephanie and six-year-old Michelle, and their dad, Danny Tanner.

"Boy, are we going to have a Sweet Sixteen blowout for you, Deej. I've got it all planned. In
fact, I could tell you about some of what I'd like to rent, but seeing as your sisters are here, I
don't think it's appropriate," Kimmy remarked.

Danny looked up from checking his briefcase before going off to work with the girls' Aunt
Becky. "No way, Kimmy. I know what that sounds like. And, no daughter of mine is going to
have a Sweet Sixteen party with an ancient Roman theme."

Michelle looked quizzically at Stephanie. "What does that mean?"

"I think it means Kimmy wants to see lions chomping gladiators' heads off. Which still would
give them more of a brain than she's got," Stephanie joked. She and Kimmy loved to tease each
other. In fact, some of the other members of the Tanner household liked to tease Kimmy, too,
considering that Kimmy was quite annoying, there all the time, and more than a little weird at
times.

Danny smiled at the comment. He thought Stephanie might understand what Kimmy meant,
but he wasn't sure. He was glad she was keeping Michelle innocent, though. He was very
protective, and wanted his girls to stay young and innocent for as long as he could.

"Come on, Mr. T.," Kimmy pined. "I want to show my best friend a great time."

"Look, Kimmy, I know you want to help your friend. But, I've got all the planning done
already. Jesse and the Rippers will be performing," Danny explained. Jesse was Becky's
husband. They lived with their twin toddlers in the Tanners' attic apartment. Jesse and Danny's
best friend Joey had moved in six year ago to help when the girls' mother died. "Their
grandparents are getting the twins overnight, while Becky takes the girls to a movie. Joey's going
to be leaving early to perform comedy somewhere."

"Gee, what a bummer. I know you all forgot mine, because it was D.J. and Steve's half year
anniversary of knowing each other well. But, I wanted to show there's no hard feelings. Besides,
this is a momentous occasion. Not only can you drive, but I think in Montana, you won't even
need consent to marry," Kimmy declared.

"And, we're just waiting for that special young cowboy to sweep you off your feet and take
you away," Danny kidded her.

As the younger girls smiled at the romantic thought, Kimmy grinned broadly at her friend.
"Deej, you're right. Your dad really does care."

"Oh, Dad, Aunt Becky told Allie she could come along to the movie. Can she spend the night
when we get back?" Stephanie wanted to know. "D.J. will probably have a few friends over to
sleep on the living room floor, from what she said."

Danny looked at Stephanie for a moment as he pondered his answer. "Well, you would have
to keep Michelle occupied, too."

"We can do it, Dad."

"Hmm, well, okay. You've been very good lately, and I think Michelle has been, too. I think
she'll listen to you. I suppose I can let you have a little party upstairs, instead of sending you two
off to Grandma and Grandpa's with Nicky and Alex," he responded. They hadn't seen their
grandparents much in the last couple years, and weren't as close as D.J. had been to Jesse's
parents.

That evening, Becky and the girls returned from a movie and dinner at about six o'clock.
After a few minutes, Becky approached Danny during a break in Jesse's band's performance.
"Danny," she said as they stood near the punch bowl. "I just got the girls settled in with the TV
from our apartment. They got a couple videos, lots of popcorn, and probably every one of their
outfits scattered around the room for a fashion show. They have enough planned to stay up all
night if they could."

Danny laughed. "That's good. You did that just in time to tell them to come down so we can
cut the cake," Danny told her. He turned to D.J. as Becky went back upstairs to the room
Stephanie and Michelle shared. "See, Deej? Isn't this a lot better than some crazy festival with
hormones running wild like Kimmy was thinking of?"

"Come on, Dad, you know Kimmy's not like that. She talks a lot, but, she wouldn't really go
wild like Kathy would," D.J. assured him after checking to make sure Kathy wasn't within
earshot.

"I know. I guess I get a little overprotective sometimes. But, this is a special moment. And, I
guess I was just afraid that if you and these couple dozen friends wound up at Kimmy's - or, at
someplace that Kimmy would think of renting - that it might just get obscured by something bad.
And, I would never want that to happen to one of my precious girls."

"Aw, thanks, Dad." She gave him a big hug. "Say, Steve was wondering if he could take me
to the Giants' home opener in a couple weeks, too."

"I don't know about the two of you together there. I know, it's just a baseball game. But,
you have to huddle extra close, it gets so cold in Candlestick Park. Believe me, one of those early
season games in 81 is how your mother and I conceived Stephanie," Danny revealed. He
considered going on, but stopped as Stephanie, Allie, and Michelle raced over to them.
Back in the present, Michelle turned to Stephanie. "Your Sweet Sixteen is in just two
months," the eleven-year-old said. "Who's planning it?"

"Anyone but Kimmy," Stephanie teased.

"I remember this - didn't Steve come in singing to D.J. then? That was really neat," Michelle
said with a smile.

"You're right, Michelle, he did," Stephanie answered dreamily. "You see..."
Suddenly, the band began playing lowly. The band played "Sixteen Candles," as the cake was
brought out and set on a card table. However, more audible was the song as it came from D.J.'s
boyfriend, Steve.

"Sixteen candles," Steve crooned as he slowly made his way over to D.J., "on your cake
tonight..."

D.J. grinned broadly as Steve continued to sing. D.J.'s guests, along with Stephanie, Allie,
and even Michelle, seemed enraptured by the beauty of the moment, as the candles were just
about the only things lighting the otherwise darkened room.

"You're only sixteen. But you're my teenage dream," came Steve rather melodious voice.
D.J. and he were almost kissing as he finished the song. D.J. had to wipe away a tear as Steve
ended with, "how I love you so."

"Oh, Steve, that was beautiful. I never knew you could sing like that."

"Of course not, usually I can't sing because I've got food in my mouth. Hey, girls," he said,
turning to the younger ones, "if there's any popcorn left when you're done, save it for me."

"Okay, you girls each get one piece of cake down here, then you go up and watch your
movies," Danny instructed them.

"Okay, Dad." Once they ate, Stephanie turned to Allie. Michelle had raced upstairs ahead of
them. "Do you think we'll have time to watch our movie before we fall asleep if we let her pick
first?"

"Maybe. But, she'll interrupt our movie with all kinds of questions."

Stephanie hummed. "True. But, remember, we're like moms for one night. We can enjoy
being looked up to; and we can also make her go to bed if she won't behave," Stephanie quipped.

Later that evening, Stephanie looked at her watch while the three girls were in their room.
"Wow, I'm impressed, Michelle," she sat as the girls sat around the TV and VCR. "It's not even
8:15. That means you only stretched a ninety minute movie into two hours with all your
questions. It used to be you'd stretch it to at least two and a half hours, sometimes three."

"They grow up so fast," came the quiet, contemplative Allie.

"Hey, where'd my panda go?" Michelle asked, looking around hastily.

Allie raised her eyebrows and chuckled. "Boy, talk about breaking the mood."

"Come on, Michelle, don't worry about him. We've got time to play a game of Candyland
before the next video," Stephanie said, hoping that Michelle would fall asleep during that game so
they wouldn't have to watch The Little Mermaid with her.

"I'm looking for Peaches. Oh," Michelle said suddenly. "He's in the recording studio."

"What's he doing there?" Stephanie asked incredulously.

Michelle gave her a "duh" look, though she wouldn't dare say that anymore. Stephanie would
give her the same harsh look D.J. would if she said that to her; and maybe a lecture, too, knowing
her. "He's recording a song."

Stephanie chuckled, then decided to take Michelle downstairs. Maybe they could catch a
glimpse of the party as it got really good now. "Okay, I'll take you down to get it. Allie, set up
the game board."

Meanwhile, D.J. was dancing to a fast tune with Steve. About twenty other high school-aged
kids were there. Jesse and his band were performing against the back wall by the staircase.
Danny and Becky were up in Danny's room discussing the following week's TV shows for their
show, "Wake Up, San Francisco."

"Hey, Deej, have you seen Kathy and the guy she brought?"

D.J. suddenly looked up. "No, Kimmy, have you?"

"No. He's about twenty, it looked like. I guess they drove off somewhere."

"Yeah, maybe," D.J. said. She knew she'd been right in inviting Kathy - she had been a good
friend in grade school, and still a friend in Junior High. But, Kathy had gotten way too boy crazy
since early in Junior High. So, it figured she wouldn't stay long.

Suddenly, she spied Stephanie and Michelle out of the corner of her eye. "What are you two
doing here?"

"Is anyone in the recording studio? The record' light's on," Stephanie explained..

Michelle rolled her eyes. "I told you, Peaches is down there."

D.J. walked tiredly over to her younger sisters. "Look, I told you I didn't want you down
here. Now, think a minute. Joey's gone. Jesse's playing up here. Who would be using it?"

Michelle looked at Stephanie. "Does she think Peaches turned the light on?"

"Well, he probably did. Now, go down there, get your bear, and get back upstairs," D.J. said
firmly.

"Hey, that rhymed," Michelle said as Stephanie ushered her back into the kitchen.
Back in the present, Michelle said, "I bet something's going to happen soon."

Stephanie looked at her sister and snickered. She squeezed her lightly and said, "You know,
you interrupt my stories now just like you did the movies we'd watch back then."

"Yeah, it's fun. But, how did the light come on?"

"Well, see, someone didn't want to be disturbed. But, boy, were things about to become very
disturbed," Stephanie declared as she went back into her tale.

Stephanie and Michelle gazed at the light above the basement studio. Jesse and Joey used the
light to show that nobody was to come down there. "Are you sure you didn't leave it on,
Michelle?" Stephanie asked.

"Positive," Michelle declared emphatically.

Stephanie shrugged. She really didn't believe Michelle. And, with Michelle being only six, her
leaving the light on without thinking would be the best excuse. After all, she didn't want Michelle
to keep complaining upstairs that she didn't have her bear. But, D.J. didn't think anyone was
down there. So, it was safest to just use the excuse that she thought Michelle left it on, if
someone was downstairs.

Stephanie and Michelle took a few steps downstairs. Then, both mouths flew open. Stephanie
quickly clasped her right hand over Michelle's eyes as they struggled to find something to say.

Especially with Hogan's Heroes or M*A*S*H or another liek that, there will be times you want to go higher than G (or K like on fanfiction.net).
If you do, don't torture your main characters more than is needed. There's no excuse for assaults and other things that aren't in the course of business for someone int hat situation. That means if you live int he inner city and see lots of crime, you stil *cannot* have it happening willy-nilly to *maain* characters unless it's a situationt hat would see it happen. Yes, you can write about the Gestapo getting Colonel Hogan. But *never* show a child as the victim if it's a main charactger.

(For an excellent series about a child who is neglected some, but that doens't get too angsty, just enough to make it realistic, see the awesome "Sam Series" by RKORadio on www.fanfiction.net. It's worth all the reading from the first story on through if you like Full Hous or even if you've never watched FH. It's book universe so it's a little nicer, more in control girls.)

Of course, you can have the mainc haracters affected by bad things if they aren't too bad - and get a little creative - just by taking things in the show sometimes. This is a story I wrote about a friend of D.J.'s who got pregnant - and you'll see that there's a lot of leeway, and you don't have to be graphic to have an effect:

You know, we never get to see D.J.'s Sweet Sixteen party on the show. Given the date of
Kathy Santoni's baby shower, though, it's quite possible she conceived around the time of D.J.'s
sixteenth birthday. Which, combined with othter problems, would explain why Kathy was never
heard from again, and could have really made it a...

SWEET AND SOUR SIXTEEN

Stephanie Tanner, fifteen, frowned as she set down the phone receiver. Michelle, her
eleven-year-old sister, walked into the room they shared.

"Hey, Steph, why the long face?" Michelle wanted to know.

"Well, you know how my friends and I have this babysitting business?"

Michelle nodded at the odd question - which when she was a toddler would have produced a
"duh." She was glad to be broken of that habit now. "Of course. You've had it for a couple
years," she declared. "I ve even helped you."

Stephanie paused, considering the history behind the person she'd just been discussing with her
friends. "Well, Michelle, we got a call from a woman who needs us. And, the other babysitters
are busy."

"I can do it if you can't," Michelle offered. She knew she was only allowed to assist yet.
However, she knew it was worth a try.

Stephanie almost was willing to let Michelle do it - the woman had sounded desperate, and it
would be a good reference, outside their usual group of referrals. However, this was a single
mother. And, Stephanie was a little unsure about the mother, or what or who might be around
the home.

"It's not that I don't have time. It's just that...well, D.J. kind of always warned me about the
girl," Stephanie hedged. D.J. was their older sister, now twenty.

"What about her?"

"Do you remember the name Kathy Santoni?" Michelle shook her head. She seemed totally
clueless. "It's okay, I understand. You may have never heard the actual name. But, D.J. says
almost the last time she heard from her, four years ago, was at her baby shower. And...well, sit
down. Let me tell you a story." She patted the bed beside her.

Michelle eagerly sat beside her sister on Stephanie's bed. Michelle, who'd recently turned
eleven, loved hearing stories about teenagers. And, from the way Stephanie was hesitating, this
one might have things in it that their dad really didn't like for her to hear; which would be fun, as
long as she was hearing it from one of her sisters. She would feel safe, then. "Tell away, Steph!"
she ordered enthusiastically.

"Well, you might remember the resulting talk. Anyway, it all started as D.J.'s Sweet Sixteen
party neared." And, as Stephanie spoke, Michelle's mind drifted back to a time more than four
and a half years before....
"Guess what, Deej," Kimmy Gibbler announced almost before she got into her best friend's
kitchen door. Kimmy was a girl of sixteen with rather...unusual tastes.

D.J. Tanner looked excitedly at her friend. She was in the kitchen with her younger sisters,
eleven-year-old Stephanie and six-year-old Michelle, and their dad, Danny Tanner.

"Boy, are we going to have a Sweet Sixteen blowout for you, Deej. I've got it all planned. In
fact, I could tell you about some of what I'd like to rent, but seeing as your sisters are here, I
don't think it's appropriate," Kimmy remarked.

Danny looked up from checking his briefcase before going off to work with the girls' Aunt
Becky. "No way, Kimmy. I know what that sounds like. And, no daughter of mine is going to
have a Sweet Sixteen party with an ancient Roman theme."

Michelle looked quizzically at Stephanie. "What does that mean?"

"I think it means Kimmy wants to see lions chomping gladiators' heads off. Which still would
give them more of a brain than she's got," Stephanie joked. She and Kimmy loved to tease each
other. In fact, some of the other members of the Tanner household liked to tease Kimmy, too,
considering that Kimmy was quite annoying, there all the time, and more than a little weird at
times.

Danny smiled at the comment. He thought Stephanie might understand what Kimmy meant,
but he wasn't sure. He was glad she was keeping Michelle innocent, though. He was very
protective, and wanted his girls to stay young and innocent for as long as he could.

"Come on, Mr. T.," Kimmy pined. "I want to show my best friend a great time."

"Look, Kimmy, I know you want to help your friend. But, I've got all the planning done
already. Jesse and the Rippers will be performing," Danny explained. Jesse was Becky's
husband. They lived with their twin toddlers in the Tanners' attic apartment. Jesse and Danny's
best friend Joey had moved in six year ago to help when the girls' mother died. "Their
grandparents are getting the twins overnight, while Becky takes the girls to a movie. Joey's going
to be leaving early to perform comedy somewhere."

"Gee, what a bummer. I know you all forgot mine, because it was D.J. and Steve's half year
anniversary of knowing each other well. But, I wanted to show there's no hard feelings. Besides,
this is a momentous occasion. Not only can you drive, but I think in Montana, you won't even
need consent to marry," Kimmy declared.

"And, we're just waiting for that special young cowboy to sweep you off your feet and take
you away," Danny kidded her.

As the younger girls smiled at the romantic thought, Kimmy grinned broadly at her friend.
"Deej, you're right. Your dad really does care."

"Oh, Dad, Aunt Becky told Allie she could come along to the movie. Can she spend the night
when we get back?" Stephanie wanted to know. "D.J. will probably have a few friends over to
sleep on the living room floor, from what she said."

Danny looked at Stephanie for a moment as he pondered his answer. "Well, you would have
to keep Michelle occupied, too."

"We can do it, Dad."

"Hmm, well, okay. You've been very good lately, and I think Michelle has been, too. I think
she'll listen to you. I suppose I can let you have a little party upstairs, instead of sending you two
off to Grandma and Grandpa's with Nicky and Alex," he responded. They hadn't seen their
grandparents much in the last couple years, and weren't as close as D.J. had been to Jesse's
parents.

That evening, Becky and the girls returned from a movie and dinner at about six o'clock.
After a few minutes, Becky approached Danny during a break in Jesse's band's performance.
"Danny," she said as they stood near the punch bowl. "I just got the girls settled in with the TV
from our apartment. They got a couple videos, lots of popcorn, and probably every one of their
outfits scattered around the room for a fashion show. They have enough planned to stay up all
night if they could."

Danny laughed. "That's good. You did that just in time to tell them to come down so we can
cut the cake," Danny told her. He turned to D.J. as Becky went back upstairs to the room
Stephanie and Michelle shared. "See, Deej? Isn't this a lot better than some crazy festival with
hormones running wild like Kimmy was thinking of?"

"Come on, Dad, you know Kimmy's not like that. She talks a lot, but, she wouldn't really go
wild like Kathy would," D.J. assured him after checking to make sure Kathy wasn't within
earshot.

"I know. I guess I get a little overprotective sometimes. But, this is a special moment. And, I
guess I was just afraid that if you and these couple dozen friends wound up at Kimmy's - or, at
someplace that Kimmy would think of renting - that it might just get obscured by something bad.
And, I would never want that to happen to one of my precious girls."

"Aw, thanks, Dad." She gave him a big hug. "Say, Steve was wondering if he could take me
to the Giants' home opener in a couple weeks, too."

"I don't know about the two of you together there. I know, it's just a baseball game. But,
you have to huddle extra close, it gets so cold in Candlestick Park. Believe me, one of those early
season games in 81 is how your mother and I conceived Stephanie," Danny revealed. He
considered going on, but stopped as Stephanie, Allie, and Michelle raced over to them.
Back in the present, Michelle turned to Stephanie. "Your Sweet Sixteen is in just two
months," the eleven-year-old said. "Who's planning it?"

"Anyone but Kimmy," Stephanie teased.

"I remember this - didn't Steve come in singing to D.J. then? That was really neat," Michelle
said with a smile.

"You're right, Michelle, he did," Stephanie answered dreamily. "You see..."
Suddenly, the band began playing lowly. The band played "Sixteen Candles," as the cake was
brought out and set on a card table. However, more audible was the song as it came from D.J.'s
boyfriend, Steve.

"Sixteen candles," Steve crooned as he slowly made his way over to D.J., "on your cake
tonight..."

D.J. grinned broadly as Steve continued to sing. D.J.'s guests, along with Stephanie, Allie,
and even Michelle, seemed enraptured by the beauty of the moment, as the candles were just
about the only things lighting the otherwise darkened room.

"You're only sixteen. But you're my teenage dream," came Steve rather melodious voice.
D.J. and he were almost kissing as he finished the song. D.J. had to wipe away a tear as Steve
ended with, "how I love you so."

"Oh, Steve, that was beautiful. I never knew you could sing like that."

"Of course not, usually I can't sing because I've got food in my mouth. Hey, girls," he said,
turning to the younger ones, "if there's any popcorn left when you're done, save it for me."

"Okay, you girls each get one piece of cake down here, then you go up and watch your
movies," Danny instructed them.

"Okay, Dad." Once they ate, Stephanie turned to Allie. Michelle had raced upstairs ahead of
them. "Do you think we'll have time to watch our movie before we fall asleep if we let her pick
first?"

"Maybe. But, she'll interrupt our movie with all kinds of questions."

Stephanie hummed. "True. But, remember, we're like moms for one night. We can enjoy
being looked up to; and we can also make her go to bed if she won't behave," Stephanie quipped.

Later that evening, Stephanie looked at her watch while the three girls were in their room.
"Wow, I'm impressed, Michelle," she sat as the girls sat around the TV and VCR. "It's not even
8:15. That means you only stretched a ninety minute movie into two hours with all your
questions. It used to be you'd stretch it to at least two and a half hours, sometimes three."

"They grow up so fast," came the quiet, contemplative Allie.

"Hey, where'd my panda go?" Michelle asked, looking around hastily.

Allie raised her eyebrows and chuckled. "Boy, talk about breaking the mood."

"Come on, Michelle, don't worry about him. We've got time to play a game of Candyland
before the next video," Stephanie said, hoping that Michelle would fall asleep during that game so
they wouldn't have to watch The Little Mermaid with her.

"I'm looking for Peaches. Oh," Michelle said suddenly. "He's in the recording studio."

"What's he doing there?" Stephanie asked incredulously.

Michelle gave her a "duh" look, though she wouldn't dare say that anymore. Stephanie would
give her the same harsh look D.J. would if she said that to her; and maybe a lecture, too, knowing
her. "He's recording a song."

Stephanie chuckled, then decided to take Michelle downstairs. Maybe they could catch a
glimpse of the party as it got really good now. "Okay, I'll take you down to get it. Allie, set up
the game board."

Meanwhile, D.J. was dancing to a fast tune with Steve. About twenty other high school-aged
kids were there. Jesse and his band were performing against the back wall by the staircase.
Danny and Becky were up in Danny's room discussing the following week's TV shows for their
show, "Wake Up, San Francisco."

"Hey, Deej, have you seen Kathy and the guy she brought?"

D.J. suddenly looked up. "No, Kimmy, have you?"

"No. He's about twenty, it looked like. I guess they drove off somewhere."

"Yeah, maybe," D.J. said. She knew she'd been right in inviting Kathy - she had been a good
friend in grade school, and still a friend in Junior High. But, Kathy had gotten way too boy crazy
since early in Junior High. So, it figured she wouldn't stay long.

Suddenly, she spied Stephanie and Michelle out of the corner of her eye. "What are you two
doing here?"

"Is anyone in the recording studio? The record' light's on," Stephanie explained..

Michelle rolled her eyes. "I told you, Peaches is down there."

D.J. walked tiredly over to her younger sisters. "Look, I told you I didn't want you down
here. Now, think a minute. Joey's gone. Jesse's playing up here. Who would be using it?"

Michelle looked at Stephanie. "Does she think Peaches turned the light on?"

"Well, he probably did. Now, go down there, get your bear, and get back upstairs," D.J. said
firmly.

"Hey, that rhymed," Michelle said as Stephanie ushered her back into the kitchen.
Back in the present, Michelle said, "I bet something's going to happen soon."

Stephanie looked at her sister and snickered. She squeezed her lightly and said, "You know,
you interrupt my stories now just like you did the movies we'd watch back then."

"Yeah, it's fun. But, how did the light come on?"

"Well, see, someone didn't want to be disturbed. But, boy, were things about to become very
disturbed," Stephanie declared as she went back into her tale.

Stephanie and Michelle gazed at the light above the basement studio. Jesse and Joey used the
light to show that nobody was to come down there. "Are you sure you didn't leave it on,
Michelle?" Stephanie asked.

"Positive," Michelle declared emphatically.

Stephanie shrugged. She really didn't believe Michelle. And, with Michelle being only six, her
leaving the light on without thinking would be the best excuse. After all, she didn't want Michelle
to keep complaining upstairs that she didn't have her bear. But, D.J. didn't think anyone was
down there. So, it was safest to just use the excuse that she thought Michelle left it on, if
someone was downstairs.

Stephanie and Michelle took a few steps downstairs. Then, both mouths flew open. Stephanie
quickly clasped her right hand over Michelle's eyes as they struggled to find something to say.

This could almost be labled "TV as it should be." Full House was one of few shows that tried to write little ones as kids. And, they did a pretty good ob of it. However, there are - if they're not careful - often little inconsistencies people have in what they say and do. Here is one that's not explained how they handle it, but that ties in to a couple 4th season FUll House episodes:

In response to a short story challenge on a group - write the shortest story (not script) you can. I had time for a little, and this is a little, but something that likely happens, and explains how they might have explained an little inconsistency. (Let’s see people go after this kind of thing in their stories.)

BOYS ARE NUTS

Joey Gladstone, professional comedian, sat at the Sizzler, enjoying lunch with the family he lived with and loved. He was helping his best friend, Danny Tanner, raise his three daughters, D.J., 14, Stephanie, 9, and Michelle, almost 4.

He was also enjoying the look he expected to come any second from Danny’s brother-in-law, Jesse, who also lived in the Tanner household.

“Ow,” he said as Jesse playfully hit him in the head. He gave a slight glare at Jesse, but only to avoid laughing.

“Look at this, I tried to shake salt on my potatoes, and he loosened the top, now look how much came out,” Jesse complained to the table.

“Boy, Jess, if you eat all that salt you’ll be a real pillar in the community,” Joey joked, thinking of the story of Lot’s wife that Stephanie had repeated from her Sunday School class earlier that day.

“A pillar in…give me a break,” Jesse complained as Joey explained what that was.

As Jesse complained about Joey’s practical jokes, Michelle considered what Jesse had done. Not only didn’t it look very nice, but Michelle had gotten timeout for pinching a classmate in preschool recently. Jesse had told her hitting or pinching was wrong, and that he’d been a “jerk” for saying it was okay to pinch back, or fight like he had when younger.

“Are you being a jerk, Uncle Jesse?” she asked innocently.

“What, who, me? Of course not, why…” He suddenly saw her looking at Joey. “Why, Joey and I are best buddies, right, pal?” He looked at Joey, then looked desperately at Danny for help. Danny passed him a look that said, “This is your mess, you get out of it.”

Joey smiled. “That’s right, pal. And best pals can do things like this to each other,” Joey said, taking some of the salt that was left and shaking it into Jesse’s normally perfect hair.

Seeing that Joey was starting to enjoy tormenting Jesse a bit too much, and that Jesse might get him back - he’d remember it very fondly when the two would battle over Joey’s flounder tart invention years later - Danny held up his hands. “Look, I think it’s time we call a truce and concentrate on the girls. Let’s have them all tell a little something fun they learned this morning.”

Though she was distracted for a while, Michelle kept thinking about what Jesse had done. She didn’t like thinking of him as bad. He was so sweet and loving. So, she figured maybe it was okay. She just didn’t like the thought of someone getting hurt, now that she knew it was bad.

Later that afternoon, she was playing with a few of her dolls. As Danny smiled upon walking into her bedroom, he noticed she had one smack the other on the head. “Ow,” came the voice of the hit doll. “Come on, now hit back, let’s play.” “Ow.”

“Honey…what are you doing?” Danny took the dolls from her. “We should play nice with our toys.”

“I am. They’re best friends like Uncle Jesse and Joey.’

“I see. You know, your Uncle Jesse doesn’t always have great judgment.”

“I don’t know what that is. But I know it’s not hair. He says he always has great hair.”

“Well, that’s true. But, well,…boys are made different than girls.”

“I know. We sit down to go potty.”

Danny blushed; he didn’t like to think of his girls growing up, and certainly didn’t like them focusing on things like that. “What I mean is, look, there’s your Uncle Jesse coming up to his room now, let’s go talk to him.” He and Michelle walked into Jesse’s room.

Jesse had quickly grabbed some song sheets and left. “Hey, guys, the Rippers and I are gonna be practicing for a little while, if you need me I’ll be over at the Smash Club,” he said as he walked downstairs, with them following.

“Jess, we need to talk first. Michelle was playing and her dolls were hitting each other.”

“Yeah, so?”

“Jess, I don’t want my little girl thinking it’s okay to hit; now, we talked about this before.”

Michelle could tell her dad was upset. “Is he being a jerk or isn’t he?”

Jesse sat and cuddled Michelle on his lap. “Look, pal, it ain’t cool to be doin’ it to everyone. It’s just…Well, I just like goofin’ around like on the playground. But he doesn't mind it, so it's cool. If he did mind I wouldn’t do it.”

“Oh, that’s a great lesson, Jess,“ Danny said sarcastically. “Some poor kid comes along and is too shy to speak up, she could just do whatever she wanted when playing with her.”

Joey overheard as he was walking in from the kitchen. “Look, Michelle,” he tried to explain. “Remember when you were watching the Three Stooges with Jesse? It’s an act we do. We’re just playing around. He’s not really hitting me, and it doesn’t really hurt.”

Jesse looked at Joey. “It doesn’t?” Realizing he needed to agree, Jesse suddenly added, “Yeah, he’s right, Michelle, it doesn’t. So, you shouldn’t have your dolls doin’ that either, because…” He looked at Joey again as Danny shook his head.

“Because…they’re not in the Screen Actors’ Guild,” Joey finished.

Michelle didn’t know what Joey was talking about. She simply shook her head and said, “You guys are nuts.”

“Well, we're not nuts, Munchkin, it's just...well, okay, maybe we are a little nuts. But, trust me, when you get to be about 10 or so, you'll start to like boys.”

Michelle smiled. “Good. Now I can enjoy myself.”

D.J. and Stephanie had been looking through old photo albums by the fireplace, reminiscing about Pam. She decided now was a good time to intervene. “Let me try to add to what they said,” D.J. said as she went over to the couch and sat beside Jesse. “Michelle, boys sometimes get a little too rough. But, that doesn’t make it right. If I were in charge, the Three Stooges would be getting sent to their rooms a lot.”

“Even if they’re in the scream actors quilt?”

Everyone snickered at how Michelle misheard “screen actors’ guild” and replaced the words she didn’t know with ones she did. “Right. But, since I’m not in charge I can’t send them to their room, and neither can Dad. So, they need to learn on their own.”

Michelle tapped her chin. “Okay. But, why does that quilt make them do dumb things?”

“Well, munchkin,” Jesse said with a sigh, “I guess it’s because of what I said earlier. I’m not a jerk anymore. But, I guess I’m still a little rougher than what I should be. But, Joey doesn’t…” He stopped himself, realizing he’d never asked Joey. He decided this would be a good time to do it, so Michelle learned. “Do you mind, Joey?”

“No. You don’t do it a lot. And, to tell you the truth, I would have loved a brother to roughhouse and do crazy things with growing up. Maybe your Uncle Jesse and I are kinda like the Two Stooges, Michelle.”

“Okay. But when I grow up, I’m not marrying a Stooge. And I’m staying away from that actor’s quilt.”

In an average sitcom, what percent of the peoples' lives do you think we see?

Surely we don't see them paying necessary bills, getting homework assignments or work duties, completing every single one, getting paid, etc.. We dont' see them buying groceries, or just hanging out having fun doing nothing because nothing interesting is happening thaat day.

So, what would you have guessed we see? 30%? 20%? Whatever it was, you probably figured my headline was nuts. You might have guessed 5% but surely not aa fraction of 1%

Butthat's what it is. Take 8766 hours in a yeaar. Figure 1/3 of thaat, approxiately, is sleepng. I'll even give you the hours of showers, bathing, driving to work or school, and so on each year. So, we can be down to a nice, round 5000 hours.

Take a show with 24 episodes. That's 12 hours for 24 30 minute episode, or 12/5000. That makes 24/10,000, or 0.24 out of 100. A quarter of 1%, or a touch ess.

But wait, you say, some episodes take place over days or weeks. Exactly - so you take an episode and figure 30 minutes over 2 days is covered. That's many hours eaach day that we don't see what the characters are doing, and many hours plus 15-20 minutes each day that we don't see what each is doing in days where the episode doesn't cover!

You may wonder, do we know these characters at all then? Well, yes, the amount we see is enough to pick up their general characteristics very well, actually. It shows us their general modds, how they react to numerous different things - which gives us a clue how they'd react to other things - and often clues us in as to their relationships, though not with all their friends - only with the type of friends they'd have. We learn how smart or dumb they likely are, and also a little about their family, dreams, goals, etc..

But, we don't know everything. Some things, we need to judge on the basis of the traits we do see. Others we need to judge ont he basis of what we know about people - i.e.: students not shown to have homework on a sitcom will have homework assignments, and we can presume the types of grades to some extent. People have friends - soemtimes we see many of those friends ("Cheers," "Friends") that the person interacts with, sometimes we don't (People in numerous family sitcoms.)

There will be times you just can't do a whole story. Or maybe you prefer scripts because you can fit them more into actual episodes. Two thoughts.

First, fanfiction.net does *not* allow scripts. Some people miss that for some reason.

Second, try to keep it consistent with the characters as you can, though you are allowed some leeway. The girls at least know about prayer in Full House, Danny prayed "Lord..." at the first Thanksgiving episode, sand Jesse had his cross necklace, so there'd be the hint f them being typical Christmas and Easter Christians. However, don't go overboard - here, I had a friend invite Michelle to this camp int he beginning, as we don't know much about her friend Lisa. (Another hint - minor characters can be used to great advantage if it doesn't violate canon.)

This is how I'd have started a 9th season

JOEY’S NEW FLAME

Joey meets a new flame while entertaining at a birthday party for Michelle’s friend. Danny needs to meet the family of a boy Steph met a couple months before - and Stephanie worries he’ll embarrass himself.

(Teaser - Michelle, Stephanie, Danny, and Caleb, Danny is picking Stephanie and Michelle up from camp)

Michelle: Dad, I'm so excited. I just met Someone wonderful!

Danny: Michelle, eight is too young for a boyfriend.

Caleb (extending a hand): Mr. Tanner, I presume? I'm Caleb Wilson. I had the awesome
privilege of leading Michelle to Christ. That's what she's excited about.

Stephanie (bouncing): Oh, yeah, Dad, this is Caleb! Aside from one thing, he's the most
wonderful boy you could ever meet!

Caleb: Mr. Tanner, I hope you would allow me the privilege of courting Stephanie.

Stephanie: Like I say, there's the problem of his being oldfashioned.

Danny: Oldfashioned? This is a boy after my own heart. I can get to know him for fifteen years
before I know if he's safe for you to see.

--------------------------------

(Michelle and D.J. are out shopping)
Michelle (picking up a large, remote controlled car): I bet Justin will love this.

D.J.: Well, I’m sure he will, but...(looks at the price tag) You know, if he saves just a couple more dollars, he can drive one just like it when he’s sixteen.

Michelle (putting it down, picks up game): How’s this?

D.J.: Well, he has a two-year-old sister. How is she on not swallowing tiny pieces?

Michelle: She’s really good...as long as you keep them out of her mouth.

D.J.: How about a book?
Michelle: Okay. He likes baseball. Maybe a Matt Christopher book. Teddy likes him.

D.J.: Okay, sounds good. Let’s meet Joey and go to the bookstore.
Michelle: We don’t have to meet him, we already know him. (D.J. shakes her head, they leave)

(Michelle and D.J. meet Joey in the center of the mall)

D.J.: We’re going to the book store for Justin’s party.

Joey: Great. I just bought this. (Holds up a bag)

Michelle: Why did you buy a bag?

Joey: It’s what’s in the bag. A brand new mate for Mr. Woodchurck. I’m unveiling her at Stephanie’s pajama party tonight.

Michelle: Great. She’ll need the laughs tonight. (She turns to D.J.): You know that boy Steph met at the camp when we went, Caleb? Dad’s been insisting on going to meet his parents. And taking Stephanie with him.

(Early afternoon, Stephanie is in the living room with Danny)
Stephanie: Now, Dad; whatever you do, don’t go in there and start cleaning.

Danny: I told you, I’m not cleaning their living room. (He pauses) Medicine cabinet okay?

(Stephanie gives him a look).

Danny: Women do it...or so I’m told.

Stephanie: Kimmy might do it.

Danny: Good point. No medicine cabinet. (He frets a little, then speaks): Look, honey, I know you think I’m overprotective, but...

(Jesse enters the door with a big bag)

Jesse: Becky and the boys back from the park?

D+S: Not yet.

Jesse: Great. I got a big surprise for ‘em. Becky’s been bugging me about getting something more homey, more Nebraska in our living room. So I had just the thing made. (He runs upstairs)

Stephanie: What could that be?

Danny: With your uncle Jesse, I have no clue. Let’s go. (They leave, Stephanie has sour look on her face)

(Joey and Michelle are in the living room, Joey has on Batman pajamas)

Joey: Okay, let me start my routine, just a minute...(He ruffles around in bag)

Michelle (getting up from couch): Joey, why are you wearing Batman pajamas? Even I didn’t do anything that crazy recovering from my concussion. Of course, the way Steph watched over me, I coudln’t have if I’d wanted to.

Joey: Well, she was really scared. So, she acted more protective. Besides, better her than your dad sticking to you like glue, especially at camp, right? (Michelle nods.) You were most comfortable with her, anyway, thanks to that first day of Kindergarten in among all those strangers, even before you got your memory back. As for Batman, it’s a pajama party, and I want to look the part.

Michelle: Joey, these girls don’t like Batman. You’ll be lucky if they like any cartoons.

Joey: Well, I figured Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle pajamas were out. But, Stephanie dressed as Batman for Hallowwen.

Michelle: When she was seven.

Joey:.(Phone rings, he picks it up): Hello, Tanner residence. What? Oh, hello, Miss Phillips. Yes, Michelle’s here, but we thought the party wasn’t till...oh, I see. Yes, we’ll be right over. (He hung up the phone.) Come on, we need to get to Justin’s party. They’re starting early.

Michelle: You’re taking me in that?

Joey: No, we’re taking the car. Their entertainment cancelled. So, they wondered if I could come.

(Joey and Michelle are leaving, Becky and the twins come in)

Alex: Mommy, can Joey go out in pajamas?

Becky: Yes, and only he could get away with it.

Jesse (coming down steps): Beck, listen. I thought about what you said, and I got us the perfect thing for our living room upstairs.

Nicky: What did you get, Daddy?

Jesse: Come up and see.

(Jesse, Becky, and the twins are in the attic apartment, Jesse pulls a tarp from a four foot tall thing)
Jesse: Ta-da!

(He unveils a statue of Elvis decked out all in University of Nebraska red. He has a white jacket, but even it had red sequins galore. His shirt and pants are red, as are his shoes.)

Jesse: I give you Nebraska Elvis.

(Becky stifles giggles, it gets harder and harder to do this as Jesse talks.)

Jesse: I realized you’re right, Becky. Nothing’s as good as Nebraska. And in fact, if Elvis had gone to college, he surely would have been a Cornhusker. And listen to this.

Statue plays after he presses a button: Don’t you step on my red suede shoes. You can do anything, but stay off of my red suede shoes...

(Jesse presses the stop button on the remote)

Jesse: What do you think?

Nicky: Isn’t that blue suede shoes?

Jesse (bending down to the twins’ level): Yeah, but you see, red’s Nebraska’s team color. And your Mommy thinks Nebraska’s so cool, if he’d gone there, he would have changed it to red. (He rises, holds Becky): Aint’t that right?

Becky: Oh, Jess...you’re so comically sweet.

Jesse: Hey, I may be sweet, but I am not comically sweet. That’s Joey’s job.

Becky: (Looks strangely at the statue): Uh...well...

Jesse: So, doesn’t it look great?

Becky: I don’t know...I was thinking a cow planter or something might be better.

(Danny and Stephanie and with Caleb Wilson and his parents in their home, they are going to sit in the living room)

Danny: I’ve heard many nice things about you.
Mr. Wilson: You, too. We watch your show quite often, before I go into work.

Danny: Wonderful. Tell me, did you think the speckled carpet looked better, or do you like the new design?

Stephanie: Dad.

Danny: Sorry. (Back to the Wilsons) So, where do you work?

Mr. Wilson: I work high up in a church.

Danny: Oh, are you a minister?

Mr. Wilson: No, I clean the steeple.

Caleb: Stephanie says Mr. Tanner used to be a sportscaster.

Danny: That’s right. I still remember that interview with the man who came up with that catchy ad campaign for the Giants. Candlestick Park used to be so cold, they sold it to the fans as a great Northern adventure, had people dressed in parkas and everything. (Stephanie looks annoyed) I remember taking Pam to one of those games, you really did have to keep each other warm (He looks at Stephanie, who is more annoyed) And I better not say more because I don’t want to give them any ideas.

Stephanie: Dad! I’m only thirteen, and he’s almost fifteen.

Danny: Just making sure.

Mr. Wilson: When did you and your late wife marry? You look quite young.

Danny: Right after the senior prom. We’d been going together since we started high school. (He notices Stephanie’s look) What?

Stephanie: Nothing. It’s just that right now, almost anything you say would be embarrassing.

Danny: Like my saying I hope you don’t marry till you’re 30?

Stephanie: That’s right up near the top, yeah.

Danny: How about praising you on your “True Love Waits” pledge, then rambling about how we didn’t need to sign a card to know we’d wait.

Stephanie: The first part’s not bad, the second part is.

Danny: Honey, how can I carry on a meaningful conversation, then?

Stephanie: Maybe by letting Caleb talk? He’s just sitting there.

Danny: Good idea. (He turns to Caleb): So, I hear you guys said you really like each other.

(Stephanie says “Dad!” while Caleb blushes at the same time)

(Joey and Michelle show up at the Phillips’ house)

Angie Phillips (Opening door): Michelle, come on in. Justin and Wendy are in back, and they’re pretty sad. Their parents aren’t going to make it here today.

(Michelle runs back to see the kids. Another boy, Ryan, comes to the door, sees Joey. Angie looks strangely at Joey, who is wearing his Batman pajamas)

Joey: I'm Joey Gladstone. I came as fast as I could. I was practicing a routine for a pajama party.

Angie: Uh...

Ryan: Yep, that's Joey all right. Do your Popeye voice.

Joey (laughs like Popeye, then talks like him): I know I looks kinda silly here, Olive, but I yams what I yams. Now let me see your little Swee' Peas.

Angie (inviting him in): Actually, Swee' Pea is Popeye's adopted son in all the comics and in some cartoons. Only in the Famous Studios cartoons is he Olive's cousin..

Joey (in awe): Ma'am, I am so impressed! You are one of the only people I have ever met who knew that.

Angie: Well, thank you. I guess it's common to assume a child is the woman's. Anyway, we couldn't get pinatas because the French waiter who was supposed to deliver them from the Italian restaurant in Chinatown has the German measles.

Joey (as Popeye): Well blow me down. Sounds like an international outbreak.

Angie (laughing): Come on. I promised Justin and his friends entertainment, and I can tell you'll
be great.

(Danny, Stephanie, and Caleb are seated at the dining room table, Mr. Wilson is taking a phone call and goes into the other room)
Mrs. Wilson (rising): Would you care for something to drink, Mr. Tanner?

Danny: Do you have any milk? (She leaves) Steph, you seem upset.

Stephanie: Who wouldn’t be, after you asked his parents if they’d had that talk about the birds and the bees with Caleb?

Danny: Sorry, Steph, but you know how protective I get sometimes. Especially with Michelle’s accident being just a little over four months ago. You were the same way at camp with her; she could hardly take a shower without you there. And that big fuss you made about not letting her anywhere near the top bunk? (She nods slowly. He pauses) Surely I’ve done something to impress you.

Stephanie: Well...I loved that part about how you and Mom were best friends almost from the moment you met. And, you stayed best friends till the day she died.

Danny (smiles wistfully): I know. I know. (He lovingly puts a hand on her knee.) And, you know, Steph, it could be worse. I could be like Joey and doing cartoon voices.

(Joey is entertaining kids, including Justin, Wendy, and Michelle, at the birthday party. He juggles some things while doing different cartoons voices. Then, he does his one-person Wizard of Oz routine from an earlier episode. The children laugh. Angie does, too)

Angie: That was great! Wasn’t Mr. Joey wonderful, kids?

Kids: Yeah!

Wendy: Cake now!

Justin: No, presents.

Wendy: Cake!

Justin: Presents!

Wendy: Pwesents!

Justin: Cake (looks up, groans): She did it to me again!

Angie: Why don’t you guys play a little while I cut the cake.

(Angie pulls the cake out and puts nine candles on while lighting them. Joey is in the kitchen with her)

Joey: Shame the parents can’t make it.
(Angie nods sadly)

Joey: I mean, their own kid’s birthday? My dad was in the military, but at least my mom was always there.

Angie: Well...they have...some problems.

Joey (concerned): Hey, you look upset. (Offers her a kleenex from her own box) Care to talk about it?

Angie: Oh, it’s nothing, it’s just...My big sister and her husband, they both travel a lot on business. And...well, there’s more. Thanks. (She blows her nose) Anyway...you know, your Popeye voice is funny, but I always preferred Loony Tunes.

Joey (as Bugs Bunny): Oh, yeah, they’re great, Doc.

Angie (chuckles a little): I guess Popeye’s just too violent for me. I mean, there’s no plot to the cartoons. I don’t think they’re that witty, either, not like Bugs Bunny is. And, with those, they’re sometimes educational, too.

Joey: Oh, yeah, like when he misses that left turn at Alberquerque, and winds up with Napoleon, or in King Arthur’s court...

Angie: Exactly.

Joey: So, how’d you know all about Swee-Pea?

Angie: Old trivia book.

(Both grin, Angie follows Joey in, chuckling)

Joey: You know, I’ve gotta be somewhere at eight, but maybe we could get an early dinner and talk some more?

Angie: I need to be home to get Wendy to bed, but I think I could manage that. How about 5:30?

Joey: Sounds great. (Angie lights the candles as scene changes)

(Jesse and Becky are in their apartment on the couch, with Nebraska Elvis behind them)

Jesse: Tell me the truth, Beck. You don’t like that Elvis, do you?

Becky: Well...I think it’s kind of tacky, don’t you?

Jesse: Tackier than a cow in an attic apartment?

Becky (laughs slightly): Well, okay. I guess that would be a little tacky.

Jesse: Aw, come on, if he doesn’t go there, where do we put him?

Becky: Maybe as part of a jungle gym for the kids.

Jesse: I never thought of that.

Becky: Jess, I was kidding.

Jesse: I wasn’t.

Becky: Jess, it’s not that I don’t like Elvis. I just don’t want him in our living room. I feel like he’s always staring at me, and ready to call me Big Mama or something.

Jesse: Well, why didn’t you say something before we rearranged the furninture?

Becky (sighs): Well, the truth is...I didn’t want to hurt your feelings. (Turns to him): Honey, I know Elvis means a lot to you. And for you to go and order a...whatever you call it is really something sweet. I know Elvis never wore Nebraska red. And I still can’t imagine him singing “Red Suede Shoes.”

Jesse: But, I did it for you, hon.

Becky: I know. And I love that my husband is willing to dress Elvis up to please me. But, let’s not have him in our living room, okay?

Elvis: Well, where do we put him?

Becky: Jess, do you really want a statue of Elvis in your house?

Jesse (thinks a moment): Nah. I guess it was just something I thought of to show how much I care. I’d do anything to help you. Well, except the hair. I wouldn’t shave my hair.

Becky: Not even if I had cancer and went bald?

Jesse: Well...

Becky: Jess, that part doesn’t matter. You don’t need to be giving me a Nebraska Elvis to show your love for me. Let’s go together and pick out something fun. Just the two of us. D.J. said she can babysit tonight. It’s been four months since the prom, and Steve might come over, but I don’t think there’s anything serious - yet. Michelle’s fully recovered, and now she’s even able to help D.J. with the boys.

Jesse: Yep. Everything’s worked out so wonderfully. And, with or without a Nebraska Elvis, we’ve got the best family in the world. (as they kiss): Have mercy!

(D.J. and Steve are with Nicky and Alex, Jesse and Becky are leaving)

D.J.: I loved your Nebraska Elvis.

Steve: Me, too. I thought it was...cute.

Jesse: Sure you don’t want him for your college? One of your friends might like it in their dorm room.

Steve: Okay, not that cute.

Becky: Actually, there’s this student lounge at the University of Nebraska. We called, and they said they’d take it.

Jesse: We’re getting our names on the wall for donating it, too. Pretty cool, huh?

D.J.: Yeah. I just hope your kids go there now.

Nicky: We wanna go where D.J. goes.

Becky: But, D.J. won’t be there when you boys get there.

Alex: Who will be at Nebraska, Mommy?

Becky (giving a look): Well, Elvis, for one thing.

(Joey and Angie are seated at a restaraunt)

Angie: You’ve got a nice family, too.

Joey: Thanks. You know, you seemed a bit distracted there, when I told you about Pam’s accident.

Angie: Yes, well...the truth is, it’s not just business travel. I say that around the kids. But, there’s something more. My older sister and her husband...they both drink. Sometimes a little too much.

Joey: Oh no. They’ve never hurt the kids, have they?

Angie: Thankfully, no. They just neglect their responsibility. They leave them with me. So, I’m caring for them a fair amount of time.

Joey: Oh, I’m so sorry.

Angie: It’s so hard sometimes. Wendy just turned two not long ago, and they showed up for that. I think Justin was a little down about that, too, till you came.

Joey (doing Bugs Bunny): Hey, Doc, you gotta keep smiling, or the world can’t smile with you.

Angie: Joey, you are so funny. It’s so nice to be with you. I think I need cheered up, too, sometimes.

Joey: Thanks. So, how does Friday sound?

Angie: Great.

(D.J., Danny, and Michelle are eating a snack as Joey comes in the door)

D.J: Hey, Joey. How was your routine?

Joey: Great. Stephanie told me things went well at the Wilsons.

D.J.: Yeah, after Dad taped his mouth shut.

Danny: Deej, I did not have to tape my mouth shut. I just let them talk for a while.

Michelle: How’d your date go?

Joey: It went great. We’re seeing each other again Friday.

Danny: That’s super.

Joey: And Michelle will vouch for the family. Won’t you, Michelle?

Michelle: Yeah. She’s got a niece and nephew who are over there a lot. But, that makes it fun. And, Joey’s great with kids. (She turns to Danny) Will you be testing my boyfriends when I’m ready?

Danny: Yes. And, D.J. and Steph might even more than me. But, you know what? I know you’ll make smart choices yourself. Sometimes I talk with the parents, and it’s just to help me realize how lucky I am. You’re all intelligent, warm, gentle, compassionate. And I want to know that the boy who lands you, just like with D.J. and Stephanie, knows just how lucky he is.

Author notes are great for explaining longer stories. But they shouldn't occur in poems or songfics like here - why have a note longer than the fic?

Instead, you should try to depict the entire character or scene or episode with the fic, so not much explanation is needed - oh, you can say "insired by sucyh and such," but this Star Trek: The Next Generation song fic tells you who Q is, alludes to a few episodes with him in it, and everything simply within the sing, which is to the tune of a Billy Joel hit, IIRC:

The "Q" Theme Song - Annoyance To Man (Tune of "Innocent Man."
Some people think they can fly right on in

to whatever part of space that they want.

They see a new race fly 'round outside

their ship and won't even say "hi."

Some humans think the universe is theirs

and they can't see beyond emotions.

They will just act like barbarians

everywhere their starship can fly.

I know you say you've advanced past that point.

I know I put Picard's nose out of joint.

I may seem wacky

but I want to see

how you put up with me

'fore the Continuum lets you go.

I'm not above making fools of you

just to show you mortals I can.

Some say I act like a two-oo year old

and I treat people like a fancy new toy.

You humans all just fill me with joy

Because I'm an annoyance to man

I'm an annoyance to man

Oh yes I am

We put the whole human race on trial

'cause we just wanted to see what they'd do.

Because we'd all seen how crazy they'd been

when they explored their own little world.

And now they go 'round in big fancy ships

seeing all sorts of anomalies.

but now you humans just don't act amazed

at the fun stuff in store.

I know you don't like to see me appear.

You tell young captains to steer very clear.

But I can tell you of so much good stuff

that will make space less rough.

Remember I warned you of the Borg.

We can even have fun for a while

if Worf will just be a "merry man."

No please don't think I'm here to pick a fight,

That wouldn't be fair becasue I would win.

It's just that I want to have fun with you

I'm only an annoyance to man.

I'm an annoyance to man

Oh yes I'm an

annoyance to man.

You know the Q think you can be really great.

The human race could have a wonderful fate.

It's your decision

how your people go

but there's one thing I know

that's that you could be out conq'ring the stars.

I'll even take you back to the start

to make sure that humanity begins.

Though by your century you don't have a cure

for people like Picard who've lost all their hair.

I'll keep on bugging you till you succeed

because I'm an annoyance to man.

I'm an annoyance to man

Oh yes, I'm an

annoyance to man.

AS it has a book universe that's different, the Full House series is a good place to show how to use an AU - explain in an A/N of sorts why it's different, than try to stick to the script at the beginning while having litte departures along the way; with a different plot for originality, like here.

In the BU, more mom-like D.J. wouldn't sneak her sisters into a movie, four years after dedicating herself to be mom-like she'd find a sitter. But, that alone could have had very funny consequences. BTW, since the books mention a grandmother (Danny's mom) in Coonecticut, I figured I'd assume she moved back by this time, & why; it would explain the TVU lack of Granny Tanner her and later, too. Last story for a while again, but thought I'd get a few ideas out at once here.

THE BABY-SITTER MERRY-GO-ROUND

D.J. Tanner, fourteen, was stunned. She'd thought her current boyfriend - well, not a really close boyfriend, but the guy she liked, anyway - would be unavailable. She'd been happy to babysit this Saturday night.

And now, here he was at the door. The movie they wanted to see started in only a little while. And yet...

Had she not dedicated herself to being more Mom-like to her sisters Stephanie, almost ten, and Michelle, five, she might have tried to sneak them into a movie, since she didn't have money to pay for their own G-rated one. But, not now. Their mother had passed away four and a half years ago, and she was going to do just what she thought her mom would do.

Start dialing a bunch of numbers in a panic. Mom always had been pretty excitable, she told herself.

"Deej, what are you diong?" Stephanie asked as she stared at her older sister. D.J. had just tried the home of Stephanie's best friend, Allie Taylor, but nobody was home there.

"And who's the hunk?" Michelle asked, repeating a word she'd heard D.J. use to describe guys.

D.J. rolled her eyes. "Guys, I'm trying to find a sitter for you. Rats, Hannah's not home, either. And Kimmy'll be working at the theater." Kimmy Gibbler was D.J.'s best friend; they and hannah were in 9th grade together. And, her mom's parents were in Greece for a month visiting Jesse's grandpa, while Danny's mom had moved back to Connecticut. Danny's parents had split rent money after divorcing when both moved out of the family home when Danny was little. But, she'd moved back a few months ago when the renters moved out, since Danny's father had passed away. "Come on, help me think."

"I could watch her, Deej."

"Sorry, Steph, you're a little too young. You need a sitter yourself."

"I could babysit Stephanie," Michelle offered.
"Michelle, you're younger than her."

"Just trying to help." Michelle tapped her chin as D.J. picked up the phone. "I could go to Cassie's." Cassie Wilkins was her best friend in Kindergarten.

D.J. plopped the phone down and said, "Great thinking, Michelle. Grab your jackets, we'll just go there and I won't have to waste time... Steph, why are you running upstairs?"

"I'm gonna work on my book report!" came the shout. As Stephanie descended with her backpack, she said, "I'm not playing Candyland all evening with a couple little kids."

"Oh, all right. Come on, let's go," D.J. said in a huff.

Cassie lived very close to the Tanners, so they were there quickly. D.J. was hoping Cassie would be home that Saturday evening. "I wish I knew where Hannah was," she said of her good friend, Hannah Larkin, as she knocked on the door.

"There she is," Michelle said as Hannah opened the door.

"Hannah, what are you doing here?"

"The Wilkins hired me to babysit, so while my parents and the others went to Dad's work party, I came here. The Wilkins are at some church activity."

D.J. breathed heavily, and decided that this was the best of a bad situation. She had found a sitter, like she'd be expected to do. It was just not how and where she'd be expected to do it. "Okay, look," she said as she ushered Stepahnie and Michelle in, "My dad and Uncle Jesse and Joey are at a hockey game." Jesse was Jesse Katsopolis, Danny Tanner's brother- in-law. He'd moved in to help Danny raise the three girls after their mom died. He'd later married Becky Donaldson; together they lived with the Tanners still and had twin baby boys, Nicky and Alex. Joey was Joey Gladstone, Danny's best friend from college, who'd also moved in to help, and who still lived in the basement. "Aunt Becky took the twins to visit someone, so they wouldn't be back in time. And, I thought I was free but now I'm not. So, could you..."

"No problem, D.J.. I'm pretty sure the Wilkins wouldn't mind. If need be, I can always take the kids back to your house; does Steph have a key?"

"She does. Great. Thanks, Hannah, I owe you one," D.J. said as she and her date left hurriedly.

Stephanie gazed after D.J. for a moment, then looked at Michelle and Cassie, who had already gotten a board game out to play. "As I said, I have a book report to do."
"Cassie's brother is building a model he got over Christmas, I'm helping him with that," Hannah reported. Christmas had only been a few days before, and the Wilkins', like the Tanners, had many decorations still up. "I might have some time to help with your book report once that's done; maybe once we get back to your house."

"Great, thanks." Stephanie opened her backpack and said, "By the way, how are we going to get in?"

"Huh?"

"Well, D.J. got out too fast for me to say I didn't get my key."

"Ooookay. This is getting interesting. Well, tell you what. Why don't you call your house and tell them where you'll be, in case they get back before D.J.."

"Sure; will we be at your house, or here?"

"On second thought, maybe you should hold off on the call," Hannah remarked.

"Gotcha." Stephanie began to work on her report as Hannah left. But, when she reached a point that stumped her, she took a break - and called home.

"Hey, Dad, in case you get this before we get in, D.J. wound up having a date after all, so we're at the sitters. That might be Hannah. It might be Cassie's. They're sorta combined right now, 'cause Hannah's at Cassie's. More as new information comes in. Bye."

Stephanie had just hung up the phone and picked up her pencil again when the Wilkins came in. "Don't worry, Hannah didn't shrink. D.J. dropped us off because she was in a hurry," Stephanie explained as Hannah came out of the kitchen and explained the situation.

"I hope you don't mind. I was going to take Stephanie and Michelle back to their house..."

"Oh, it's no problem, Hannah, thanks." Mrs. Wilkins hugged Cassie and her brother, and then told Cassie, "Do you remember that nice Mr. Wentzel? The man whose wife died a couple years ago?"

"Yeah, Mommy. We took a turkey to him."

"Why didn't he just get a dog?" Michelle wanted to know.

The Wilkins laughed heartily. "Dear, we took a turkey for him to eat at Thanksgiving. I was just telling Cassie about him because I thought we could go visit him tonight."

"So, we'll be going with you?" Stephanie guessedpointing a pencil at Hannah.

"Well, no, sorry guys. I just sort of realized I did promise my folks I'd be at the party once the Wilkins got home." Hannah looked at them and said, "If it's okay with you."

"Oh, no problem at all, we love having Stephanie and Michelle over," Mrs. Wilkins said. As it was still early evening, before it was dark, Hannah got on her bicycle and rode the several blocks to the party, since it wasn't very cold outside.

"We called and promised him we were coming; or at least some of us were," Mr. Wilkins noted. "But, I can always here with Stephanie and Michelle while you take the kids, honey."

"Can Michelle come, too?" Cassie asked eagerly.

"Welllll, I suppose," Mrs. Wilkins remarked. "We won't be staying very long anyway, and I know you girls won't be too rowdy. We'll be back home in plenty of time before D.J. or their dad picks them up, honey."

"Great; just let me make one call," Stephanie said, holding up a finger and rushing to the phone. "Dad," she said once the machine picked up, "it's Steph. It'll be the Wilkins, except they promised to visit an elderly friend. So, we'll be out spreading some cheer for a few minutes. But, we'll be back at the Wilkins' by the time you get this. Bye."

Upon arriving at Mr. Wentzel's house, however, the elderly gentleman was clearly in some pain. "I've been having these pains off and on for a while," he said.

"Where does it hurt?"

"It's all over my chest, like a crushing feeling," he told Mr. Wilkins.

"Oh, boy. Look, we need to get you to the hospital." He looked at his wife, and said, "Honey, I think we'll have enough room, we'll just have to double up on the seats; the seat belts are big enough people can sit on laps and still be strapped in."

Michelle quickly ran out to the car. "I get Stephanie's lap," she announced.

"All right, and Cassie can use mine in the back. We'll put your brother up front, Cassie" she informed Cassie.

"So will one of you be taking us back to your house?" Stephanie wanted to know.

"I'm afraid not, Dear, both of us will have to be hlping him so he doesn't fall, plus calling a few relatives. We know a friend who babysits our kids, she can watch you girls, too."

"Rrrright."

As Stpehanie tried to keep everything straight in her mind, Michelle turned around in the seatbelt once buckled in and asked, "Who will be babysitting us?"
"Anyone but the Gibblers. I'd rather have Nicky and Alex babysit us!" she remarked, referring to Jesse and Becky's baby boys. Kimmy was weird and very annoying, especially to Stephanie, and it stood to reason Kimmy's family was just as odd, though they didn'tseem near as annoying because at least they weren't over all the time like Kimmy.

Once they arrived at the hospital, Stephanie went in with the other kids while the Wilkins helped Mr. Wentzel. Stephane led the children over to the pay phone to call home - but when she reached into her pocket for a quarter, she found her key! It had been on her new key chain, but she'd forgotten that she'd put it in her pocket that morning.

"Hey, Dad; it's Steph," she told the machine. "Guess what - I have my key after all. I forgot about that new key chain you got me, I had put it in my pocket this morning. So, I guess Hannah could have...well, what does that matter? We're with the Wilkins, but they had to take that older neighbor to the hospital. His chest was really hurting; he said it felt like a crushing feeling. They think it might be a heart attack. But, at least I found my key; oh, maybe I didn't tel you I didn't have it. Did I? No, I guess it was just D.J. I told, back when she dropped us off with Hannah - well, with Hannah at the Wilkins'. But, anyway, they're..." The machine beeped and hung up, as Stephanie had talked for too long. "How rude," she said into the phone before hanging up.

"Did you talk to Daddy?"

"Yeah, Michelle, but I didn't have enough time to say where we were going. I guess we'll just have to wait till we're...well, wherever we're going." She put an arm around Michelle and one around Cassie and smiled at Cassie's brother, who was practicing his baseball swing with an invisible bat. "I'm so glad you guys are co-operating, and staying right here. You make my job so much easier." She remembered D.J. complimenting Michelle often when younger about such things, and knew it was important to shower praise on kids sometimes. She really was glad, too; she couldn't imagine what it would be like having to corral these kids. She grinned as Mrs. Wilkins checked to make sure they were all okay.

"You could handle the troublemakers, too," the boy said confidently. Michelle smiled proudly at Stephanie in agreement.

"Yeah. I guess. I handle them pretty well now when I help the principal out. Of course, who knows what kind of challenge I'll face next year. I just now really got established as Principal's Assistant." She snickered and said, "I don't know if it was more stopping Aaron's bullying, or the fact you sent so many kids to me those first couple weeks after you came to see me your first day of Kindergarten, Michelle," Stephanie remarked.

Mrs. Wilkins walked up to them. "Okay, kids, come on. They'll be checking Mr. Wentzel out for a couple hours, but before I try to call some of his relatives, I'm going to try to get you someplace where they can watch you." She informed Cassie and her brother that she'd be back to get them about eleven that evening. "It won't be long, although you'll probably be asleep by then, Cassie." With the video games this friend had for her own nephews, it was likely that the Wilkins' boy might be awake till then.

"He'll probably keep me awake shouting at the game," Cassie said of her brother.

Once they were driven and introduced to the newest sitter, Stephanie asked if she could use the phone. While Michelle and Cassie enjoyed some ice cream for dessert, and Cassie's brother ran to the video game system in the spare bedroom, Stephanie phoned home once more.

"Hey, Dad, it's me again. Now, we're...well, we're at Staci Saunders' house. It's a friend of Mrs. Wilkins, but you know, I forgot to get the address yet. It's probably in the book, though. In fact, I just thought, Mrs. Wilkins said she'd be back by eleven. You might be back by then. I'm sure D.J. will be. Why don't I call Allie's mom? Maybe she can take us home."

Stephanie got the address from Miss Saunders, and called Allie's house. "Hey, Al....You just got back from a late dinner? Well, we need a babysitter....What do you mean, for who? For Michelle and I....It's a long story. Look, can your mom pick us up at this address?"

Once that had been taken care of, Stepahnie called home again.

"Hey, Dad, it's Steph. Allie's mom is coming to get us, so we'll be home pretty soon. In fact, probably before you get home. So, if you get home first, Deej, don't worry. We'll be there." Stephanie hung up, trying to remember if there was anyone else she should call. Oh, yes, the theater.

Kimmy Gibbler answered the phone at the ticket window. "Hello, cinema....Hey, what's up, squirt?...Look, I don't care whio had to go to the hospital, I've got a job to do. This is one of the few places that would take me....So you say you're being taken home?...Look, I can't tell D.J. everything you're saying, my brain doesn't work like that."

"Your brain doesn't work, period, Kimmy," Stephanie cracked. "Look, just tell D.J. to come home; we'll be there with the sitter."
"Your home?"

"Of course, our home! Whose house did you think it would be, the President's?"

"Just checking." Kimmy wrote down the message on a piece of paper. "Tell D.J. to go home. Got it."

"Good." Stephanie sighed. "At least she can do one thing right."

Mrs. Taylor, Allie, Stephanie, and Michelle were relaxing in the living room talking about presents when D.J. and Kimmy walked in. "Hey, Steph, we got your message, thanks." D.J. glanced at Mrs. Taylor. "How did you wind up as the sitter, Mrs. Taylor? When I tried you before nobody was home."
Kimmy threw back her head. "And Steph thought I was dumb not being able to get that complicated story she tried to tell me. It's obvious, Deej."

"What's obvious?"

"Well, of course, the Taylors weren't home, Deej. They were right here all the time."

"Kimmy..." D.J. held her mouth opened as Danny, Jesse, and Joey entered the house from the kitchen. It would be too hard to explain this late at night. "Never mind."

"Daddy!" Michelle ran up to Danny and hugged him.

As they embraced & Danny picked her up and held her, he said, "Hey, pumpkin; sounds like you were on a merry-go-round tonight."

"I was? Where was the music?" She held out her hands. "And where was the cotton candy?"

"Sorry, Dad. I found out I actually did have a date, so I found a sitter. Except, well...it kind of got out of hand, I guess. I still don't know what all happened, although Kimmy tried to explain from what she got of Steph's story."

"It's okay. Although next time, you might think about trying Blockbuster."

"Sure, Dad; this time it wasn't a movie they'd be allowed to see, though." D.J. looked at Steph. "I figure I may as well admit that; you would, anyway."

"You bet. You've trained us well, Deej."

"She really has. And, I guess it's just like something that Mom would have done. I still remember that day Steph was born. Rushing around trying to find a sitter for you, Deej, and having to interrupt doing that to keep you from using all our jugs as water bottles." He turned to Jesse and Joey, obvivious to D.J.'s embarrassment. "Remember that, guys? She had heard somewhere that hot water bottles were used sometimes, so she poured all our milk and juice into every glass there was, and was running hot water into the jugs." Turning back to D.J. he said, "You were ready to start helping her deliver right then and there."

"Dad!" The snickering from the others was bad enough; Kimmy's was horrifying. "Whatever you do, don't repeat that at school," she instructed her firmly.

"Oh, I won't, Deej. Except for an occasional reference to your nursing skills."

"I won't complain; it sounds like you couldn't have expected things to get that wild. And, you've taught Steph how to handle herself and Michelle well, and neither was in any trouble." He chuckled as he said, "In fact, Steph, if you wanted to be a little less verbose in leaving messages, I wouldn't mind."

"Okay, Dad."

"I'm still waiting for the cotton candy," Michelle exclaimed, still in Danny's arms.

"Let's all go out and have ice cream isntead before we get you girls to bed," Danny sugguested. They all followed him out to the kitchen, after he thanked the Taylors and they went home.

Stephanie was getting a sinking feeling as Danny explained to Michelle what he'd meant by a merry-g-round. "I think we need to go back to the Wilkins'.

"Steph, it's okay; you're not on that merry-go-round any more," D.J. said.

"No, I mean, I think I left my backpack with my book report there."

"And we didn't finish our game of Candyland."

"You girls can go back tomorrow to pick it up," Danny assured them.

"Okay." Michelle turned to D.J.. "But if you put us on that thing again you make sure they have some cotton candy."

"We'll try. But, if they don't have that, will ice cream do?" Michelle nodded with a mouth full of it. "I guess I didn't do too bad being in Mom's shoes tonight, huh?"

"No, not really. You were responsible enough; you could have stayed home, but I want you to have your freedom, too. And, it's one of those things where normally, there's two good sitters where you left them, then it turned out there were none. But, your mom couldn't have done much better. And Steph, you watched out for Michelle, and kept calling and calling, and calling. You really take after me in how much you like to talk. And Michelle, it sounds like you listened to all of your sitters very well. I'm glad to know I'm raising such wonderful, responsible young ladies."

Had a couple other thoughts. Many people want to continue shows after they're done - some excellent work has been done by many on Hogan's Heroes, but this is one example where it's after the war. It also was praised by several reviewers for just the right amount of subtlety, not being too over the top witht he issue of Jackie Robinson breaking the color barrier, so I thought I'd paste it here.

IT WAS WORTH IT ALL

Peter Newkirk looked at the thing he held in his hand with a mixture of curiosity and disgust. "What in the world is this?"

"It's a hot dog."

Newkirk glanced at Andrew Carter, his former partner in crime at Stalag 13 and rolled his eyes. "I know it's a hot dog, Andrew. The bloody vendor gave you two of 'em when you called out 'Hot dogs here!' That still doesn't bring me any closer to knowin' what it is. What's it made of?"

Frenchman Louis LeBeau, seated on Newkirk's left in the single-decked ballpark, had seen the odd items being sold elsewhere. He shrugged and said matter of factly, "Maybe it's made of emilac."

Newkirk shook his head. That had been an in joke ever since he and LeBeau had come to the United States to visit. Any strange, new thing to them instantly was explained away with a chemical that didn't exist. A chemical that LeBeau had been proclaimed the inventor of back at Stalag 13, as an aide in one of the Heroes' top secret missions.

"I'll 'emilac' you. Here, Carter, you bought it, you eat the bloody thing. I'll stick with peanuts. At least I'm used to helpin' myself to some of the elephants' snacks when I'm backstage with the circus." He gave the hotdog back to Carter.

"Sorry I'm late, guys. Did I miss anything, Kinch?" General - formerly Colonel - Robert E. Hogan sat on the far right of the group, next to James Kinchloe.

"Nope. They're just about to start the national anthem." All five joined the rest of the crowd in standing and placing hands and/or caps over their hearts. They sang proudly and joyfully, though mostly off key. Their eyes watered as the song neared an end. It was almost two years to the day since they'd been liberated from Stalag 13.

Stalag 13. Kinch's mind had been on that place for much of the day. Indeed, for much of the last few weeks - ever since his friends had confirmed Kinch's invitation and said they would be there for a reunion starting the previous Saturday. And, they had arrived, though Hogan had had enough work that he hadn't gotten to the game until just before it started.

They cheered quietly until the object of their interest came up to bat for the first time. He hit a ball sharply toward the left side of the infield, and sped down the line toward first base.

"Out," cried the umpire. The Heroes watched as the player turned, seemingly ready to argue the call - which could have gone either way - then stopped. He ignored the questionable call and went down into the dugout. Hogan smiled at the self-control. It was quite impressive, all things considered - as was the man's speed. He'll do great things someday, he said to himself.
"About time huh? I remember you telling me about a fellow in Detroit - Stearnes, was it?"

"Yeah," Kinch said absently. "Turkey Stearnes. Great outfielder."

"I got to meet Ted Williams we both came home - he was a flyer in the Marines, you know. He says the Hall of Fame needs to think about these guys, too, if they're truly dedicated to enshrining all the best. I told him when he makes the Hall he should make his speech about that. He said he'd been thinking about the same thing," Hogan said matter-of-factly. "He's intent on being the best hitter who ever lived."

Carter suddenly interrupted his monologue toward Newkirk, a former soldier from Britain, and LeBeau, a former French solder. He turned, wide- eyed, toward Hogan. "Wow, you got to meet Ted Williams?!" he shouted for half their section of the ball park to hear. "The Ted Williams? The man who hit .400 back in '41?"

"Yep. Being from New England, I had to ask if I could. Just one of those little perks," Hogan said. He was quite modest - he actually idolized the younger Williams, not just for his phenomenal baseball ability, but for his dogged determination to fight for his country, too. He had been one of their better ones at training other pilots, which was Williams' main job during the war. He reportedly had 20/12 vision; better than "perfect."

Hogan's exploits during the war had earned him the right to meet him if it could be arranged, which it had. The great hitter carried the same intensity to his job that Hogan had to his. Williams was so determined to perfect his hitting that he would practice swinging wherever he could with imaginary bats - even while waiting at stop lights when walking.

Hogan, meanwhile, had honed his skills to become a true master spy - wanting, like Williams, to be the best ever, though he would never tell anyone that. And, the four men seated with him had been part of a group known as Hogan's Heroes. They were the All-Stars, the main cogs of this unit that had operated the most incredible top secret organization of all during the war.

They had operated it in the heart of Germany, from inside a German Prisoner of War camp. That camp had been Stalag 13.

The Heroes continued to watch the game, their minds happily away from the dangers of that camp. They had carried out many types of covert missions. Some had involved rescuing airmen. Some had involved rescuing captured Underground agents. Some had involved stealing secret plans or helping people defect - that last had been aided by LeBeau's pretending to be a famous chemist who had experimented with synthetic fuel. Hogan had told their bungling camp kommandant, Wilhelm Klink, that LeBeau had invented emilac as part of that ruse.

However, their missions had also brought much danger, forced them to improvise in incredible ways, accomplish nearly impossible feats, and impersonate Germans on numerous occasions - even Hitler himself! And, of course, if they'd been caught, with the amount of information they had, the methods the Gestapo would have used...well, even Hogan didn't want to think about that.

"Holy cow, did you see that play?" the boyish Carter shouted as the Braves' third baseman dove to take away a sure base hit, then threw to second practically from his belly. Even Newkirk and LeBeau were impressed - though partly because it gave Carter a moment to lapse into silence. It seemed that whenever he wasn't eating ice cream and hot dogs, he was going through a rapid monologue trying to explain the nuances of the game to the foreigners. Nuances that would have been more easily understood had they not just comprehended two innings ago that those foul balls were considered strikes - unless the batter already had two strikes, of course.

"Andrew, we could all tell that was a great play, why don't you just leave it at that?" LeBeau asked.

Newkirk waved his hand. "Aw, don't bother, Louie. Whatever you say, 'e's still gonna find a way to compare it to some guy named Wamby an' his tripping play in the Series in 1920, or maybe talk about how Babe Ruth was the best player ever till he got Lou Gehrig's Disease."

Carter was aghast. "It was a triple play that Bill Wambsganss made unassisted in 1920. And, Babe Ruth never had Lou Gehrig's Disease, Lou Gehrig had Lou Gehrig's Disease." He watched as Newkirk rolled his eyes. "Well think about it. Why would a great player die and then have the disease named after someone else?" Newkirk playfully pulled Carter's Brooklyn cap down over his eyes.

LeBeau leaned over and said, "Anyway, thanks for inviting us to this game, Kinch."

"Hey, no problem," Kinch said absently, still lost in his thoughts, but with an enormous grin on his face. "It was the worst kept secret in the city, that he'd be signed. When my one cousin called and mentioned this last month, I just knew we had to try and make it a reunion."

"Yep, there's nothing more American than baseball," Hogan mused. He was glad to have an exciting game to introduce his foreign friends to - the 26,000 plus fans were clearly enjoying themselves in a very close ball game.

"All right," shouted a woman in the bleachers. She rang a cowbell at a good play that the Dodgers made on defense, and continued to holler.

"That woman's been there since the '30s, I think my cousin said," Kinch informed the others. "She always has her cowbell, and her voice reminds of an air raid siren."

"An' that band reminds me of Klink an' his lousy violin playin'," Newkirk responded.

Carter pointed to the sign they carried. "Hey, look. It says 'Sym- phony band.' That's funny."

"Sounds like that's what they are," LeBeau added.

Kinch nodded. "I asked, they don't usually do guest performances, but they said they might for someone good enough at playing bad - they're kind of like mascots almost. They've been together quite a while, too."

"I bet we could get old Klink to leave his job as Schultz's bookkeeper for a while and come play a bit for them," Hogan said. Klink played the violin very badly. Schultz was the chief of the guards at Stalag 13 - and had constantly ignored the Heroes' antics. He had been more or less a neutral, though perhaps slightly favoring the Allies, as he could see some major problems with the Nazis. He had just wanted people to be nice to each other and stop this war so he could reopen his toy factor. He had managed to do that recently.

The band played louder as the game's excitement intensified in the seventh. The player who had been signed recently laid down a fabulous bunt to try and push the tying run to second. He was so fast, the first baseman had to hurry his throw - and the batter wound up on second base after the ball hit him. Moments later, he scored what would prove to be the winning run on Pete Reiser's hit.

The fans all cheered as the last out was made in the 5-3 win. Kinch, however, was perhaps the most subdued of them all as the Heroes stood around, waiting for the crowd to diminish before trying to leave themselves.

"Hey, Kinch, what's on your mind?" LeBeau asked.

"It was worth it all."

"Huh?"

"It was worth it all, Louis. All those sleepless nights, all the worries and dangers, all those times we were almost caught. All the anxiety. When Jackie Robinson scored that winning run today, when the fans cheered regardless of his race, when the whole team, regardless of race, came together and won..."

"Oh, yeah, you said somethin' about this being the first integrated team ever," Newkirk realized. Hogan's Heroes had been integrated - Kinch and another of the All Stars, Baker, were black, after all, and there were a few other black prisoners in their unit Newkirk was so used to the way Hogan had run things, he hadn't really thought about that being unusual until Kinch's statement reminded him.

Kinch nodded. "That's right. White teams had played the Negro League teams before in exhibitions. But, this was the first time a Negro ballplayer ever played on a major league team."

"And, it wouldn't have been possible," Hogan added pensively, "unless we'd gone through all that we did, to defeat the idea of the 'master race.'" He mulled over all that they'd gone through, and all that would still have to be done in his own country. "This is a great beginning," he said. "And, you're right. The barriers are going to come down, because we chose to give it all. It really was worth it." He snickered as he heard Carter going on about Josh Gibson's mammoth home runs. There was a man who understood the importance of the simple things in life.

"Come on, Andrew, it's just a game," LeBeau said.

"Oh, it's a game, LeBeau. But a game that means so much to us Americans. And, the battle Jackie Robinson is facing...well, it, and all the other big steps we'll face, will be won, because we defended the values of equality and freedom and democracy." Hogan smiled as he gazed proudly at Old Glory flapping int he cool April breeze. "It was a hard fight. But, it was worth every bit of it."

Again, this "Touched By An Angel" story illustrates what is great - we can put some stories in anytime and they'd work with some series, or before or after, but don't torture your stars. And, reaaly, you can write great adventure without hurting anyone, as in this final in our series, for now - the reaal adventure.

Summary: Many thoughts ramble through Monica's mind as she ponders the intense nature of spiritual battles while watching over several people in hiding in World War II.
The girl's muscles tensed. Watching out the window, she appears like a goalie waiting to block a shot. She should be doing this while playing soccer right now, having fun, Monica told herself. Instead, here she is, staring out a window.

No, thank goodness, that truck wasn't a Gestapo vehicle. Probably wouldn't have been, either, because she didn't see Kathleen, the angel of darkness who was her nemesis. Lori, the Guardian Angel for this seven-year-old girl, stood by, praying as usual. Maybe it was a false alarm. Maybe that woman who was sneaking around earlier wasn't a Gestapo agent. Maybe...

"Maybe Ahab," cried the girl as a car rumbled down the street. No, thought Monica, that's going too fast, they would slow down if they were Gestapo. And, I would see the forces of darkness riding with them. And, perhaps, if there weren't enough prayers, they would win, and...no, she told herself, you can't afford to think like that. She prayed silently, asking for extra protection. These were the battles you had to win. There could be no slipups.

Life was so much simpler in the old days, before this war, Monica told herself. Poor little girl probably can't recall a time when her family wasn't hiding Jews. As the war drew near completion, Monica sensed that the devil and his minions would work with even greater urgency. Oh, how she wished each spiritual battle wasn't so important. Oh, how wonderful it had been when one could mess up an assignment a little, and not much terrible would result. Where an angel's muscles weren't tensed the whole time, where one wasn't constantly on the lookout. Where the choice of the exact time at which to appear in human form and help wasn't so crucial. Where she could sit down to a good cup of coffee and have some time between assignments. But, now?

Many such extreme assignments transpired every day, yet it was still not enough. Her heart ached, so she knew God's must break in two daily. Christians and others who deliberately fought to protect the Jewish people were very sparse, and very widely scattered throughout Europe. She remembered the grand celebration when over 6,000 had been hidden in Denmark in one night, then ferried across to Sweden - now that was a miracle. Probably the only real happiness for angels these days, but at least it gave her something to cling to.

The girl would not be budged. Uh-oh, she told herself, here comes Kathleen whispering in the girl's ear, trying to put ideas in her mind and get her to slack off. Is she doing this because they're coming, or to get her to be less attentive now, so next time maybe there will be a slip. Monica furiously called for assistance in the spiritual warfare and reminded the girl in a still, small voice to keep up the good work, keep striving to do God's will. Her words were soothing, Kathleen's could not be, for they were of the darkness, and Monica's were of the Light of the world. Still, Kathleen persisted. Monica reminded herself to be alert, constantly soothing the girl's mind and rebuking the evil thoughts as Lori looked on anxiously. She wondered if she shouldn't appear in human form right there - no, that would cause too much confusion in the ranks. Should she have appeared before? The frustration seemed unending - when did she appear?

Thankfully, this girl's older brothers and parents provided great encouragement, and this small one was choosing the Light, selecting that which had brought her such thrills, even if part of the thrill was being the first to spot some color, bird, or what have you before anyone else. No, Monica decided, I didn't have to appear in human form to them that early. Or....

Suddenly, a car came slowly down the street, from several blocks away the youngster could see it could be Gestapo. Monica thanked God for answering the family's - and the angels' - prayers. One of their members possessed excellent sight, and competed with her brother in many eagle-eyed challenges to spot different colors, butterflies, birds, and so on.

Now, of course, the stakes stood much higher. Monica soothingly coaxed the girl to make the call, giving her a warm feeling as the girl hollered out "Ahab's car!" Clever code, thought Monica, all their terms based on Scripture. The girl hadn't taken her eyes off the window. Several angels arrived to help, and Monica sensed the hostility with which the Gestapo men acted. This was no place for a simple helps angel; this was a job for the warriors, the kind who smote an army of over 150,000 Assyrians in one night.

Kathleen tried to whisper "three" in the blonde-haired cutie's ear as the girl darted from the window. "Level five," she hollered, actually one higher than needed. This was the signal to flee; and perhaps that had been placed by the Lord Himself. Monica decided she would become visible quickly to assist them. Yes, people had free will, but this was important to the Lord, and the peoples' great faith had meant that could count on the Lord delivering them.

Much scampering occurred, and Monica - so focused on the girl - had not noticed that there were now quite a few angels of darkness lurking, bugging all the members of the family to little avail, as Guardians protected papers and kept people from tripping. Then, there were the dark angels with the Gestapo unit. Monica sighed as an evacuation occurred. She longed to go back and protect the mother, for she was stalling the Gestapo. Her assignment was this one, though. Oh, why can't I go back and help the mother, pleaded Monica as she rushed to an exit. She felt big tears developing until she heard the familiar voice of Tess beside her. "Just keep the faith, Angel Girl," came the soothing voice, "you're not the only angel of Light here."

Monica already felt spiritually and emotionally exhausted as the children fled via a secret entrance and ran to a checkpoint. There was so much spiritual warfare, demons planting in the hearts of the children the desire to slow down, not to flee, and so on, that Monica couldn't keep it all straight. She kept implanting notions of fleeing quickly, of going with the wings of eagles, and hoping, praying, for an end to this madness. God Himself longed to end the terrible wickedness of the Holocaust, but He could only do so by eliminating human free will or by violating the very laws of nature. Monica sighed, praying that this family, at least, make it out in one piece.

Suddenly, as she witnessed several demons bugging the leader, a blonde teenage boy, she appeared out of nowhere. She could tell the suddenly doubting youngsters which way was safest. "This way, I know you seek help for your friends," she spoke suddenly but soothingly. Had that been the right call, she asked herself, glancing around and hoping she saw no Angels of Death. She was sorely tempted to stop any, even though she knew those like Andrew merely wanted to do their duty by lovingly taking people into the ever loving, everlasting arms of the Father. Stop it, she told herself, this is too important for there to be divisions in Heaven. We need to be united in love. She prayed for God's love to be shown in this case, and suddenly a great peace came over her.

The spiritual warfare wasn't over by a longshot. Because the children had begun to recite Bible verses, the forces of darkness around them were considerably less. Should she stay or go to the mother - or go somewhere else? Yes, the sword of the Spirit, which is the Word of God, was keeping the forces of darkness at bay. This made her job a little easier, because she didn't need to battle so many enemies and place warm, soothing thoughts in the childrens' hearts. On the other hand, they might be in serious trouble if she left for the mother. But, did the mother need it even more? Should she appear with papers provided by the Lord and help talk the mother out of the spot she was in?

Then, she thought of the house. Have they hidden their escapes well enough? A trap door leading from one floor to the other was easy enough to explain - many homes had them. But, what about other little signs? How about the tunnel entrance - should she go into the house, appear in physical form, and check that? No, because then if she were spotted in physical form, there might be some mass confusion, especially because the mother might begin to stammer about her, and both of them could be in big trouble. She could surely cause more problems for the mother. But yet, if... Monica shook her head. She once again felt like the only angel there, a common feeling among all angels during this time period. The assignments were so hard, the pace so strenuous. The consequences of one little misstep, one missed turn, could be deadly. Andrew had told her already of one case where he'd taken a ten-year-old girl up to the Lord with him because she had run to warn a Jewish family in a barn. The family, thankfully, escaped. However, the point Andrew had made was that the forces of darkness had managed to convince the Gestapo to check there, and the hiders to slack off a little bit. Yes, people had free will, but they might not have had the devil not been trying so hard. That was all it took, one little seed planted by the devil.

Monica fretted. Why are the forces of darkness so prevalent, she asked herself. She was thankful she was not yet a Caseworker angel, but merely with Search and Rescue. This was why she'd been assigned to this detail; Tess had been observing another Caseworker angel dealing with the father of the girl she'd been watching. There was a really tough job. Yes, search and rescue was difficult, and involved a fair deal of work, but case working? That kept one on their toes all the time.

Monica chose to follow the children. Once they were safely at a checkpoint, she grieved over her inability to be in two places at once, but after praying silently once more received peace from the Father, a still small voice reminding her that He was working, even if she couldn't see. She learned that a Caseworker was on standby to assist in the event the children needed to leave Germany by themselves. She began to travel back toward the home, only to see the husband and wife heading toward the checkpoint. She breathed a heavy sigh of relief. "See, Angel Girl," spoke Tess, "they made it. You're not alone." Tess could tell Monica needed some confidence building, and decided she would watch her, now that the Caseworker had done his job.

Monica followed the parents back to the checkpoint. Her mind was already near exhaustion as she waited for a couple minutes by having some coffee in a nearby restaurant. Steve, the Caseworker angel in question, also entered. "You drink so much of that, you're going to get addicted," he quipped. Not that angels could get addicted, he told himself, but she looks like it.

Monica smiled. I have really gotten into a habit since the war began, but now I blend in more, she said to herself. "It's the only pleasurable thing around sometimes," spoke the angel. It being near nightfall, she realized they would once again be on the move. She rose to see Gestapo coming, and hurried over there with Steve. She longed to be able to simply appear in angelic form, but realized the Nazis were so brutal they wouldn't care what an angel told them. She noticed that the family already left, and chose to act with Steve as if they were husband and wife shopping together, as the checkpoint was also a grocery. "Gut naben," she spoke, giving the heil sign. When question, she produced her papers and remarked that she and Steve were too much in love to notice anyone else. Yes, she considered, too much in love with God.

Was that the right thing to say, she asked herself. Will they believe us? Oh, get us out of here, Lord, she prayed. What if it wasn't - have we acted properly? Is there anything more I can do? What better could I do here? After several moments, the Gestapo dismissed them and told them not to interfere, for they were hunting people suspected of hiding Jews. Oh, dear, she told herself, at least we delayed them. What could have happened had I been a second later, she asked herself, frustrated. Yes, coffee had become an obsession with her, but it wasn't a huge vice, and besides, she needed something to calm her in human form, with this constant spiritual warfare.

Monica and Steve each followed to the next checkpoint, finally catching up with the family. They chose to disappear into invisible form once more. And again, there was Kathleen, trying to stir up trouble, planting in their hearts thoughts of hopelessness, of fear, of slothfulness, thoughts which came from their own minds at times, from their own imaginations. That was the tool the devil used best. Luckily, Monica could reciprocate, and do so better, for she was of the LIght. She responded by trying to build their morale. Thankfully, this was a family well tuned to the Lord's will. Unfortunately, in this day and age it made the forces of darkness attack all the more.

Finally, the family came to a checkpoint, where they represented themselves as having several more chlidren than they really did, and showed fake ID papers for the Jews, who were slightly hidden by the darkness. Monica found herself choosing human form again, assisting the smaller children and ensuring they not wander off into the woods after the family was waved through. She merely explained she, too, was fleeing. They then took off into the hills toward Switzerland, which was still a couple miles away. The parents and the eldest child helped the younger ones walk, but once more, the children began to wander. Despite the risk of the Gestapo seeing her, she knew human form was essential to guide the children back. Her job as Search and Rescue angel kicked in as she assisted in keeping the children from getting lost. However, the forces of darkness kept bugging the kids to go and see some plant, or animal, or something else that looked interesting. Kathleen especially worked on one boy who seemed fascinated with reptiles and such. The family was startled, but she assured them she knew the way, and they greatly appreciated her help as they snuck through the woods.

Finally, they were in Switzerland. Safe at last. Monica vanished, then breathed a huge sigh of relief. Boy, could I go for a nice, bug chocolate latte right about now, she told herself, physically and mentally drained.

Tess and Monica's supervisor, Lily, both appeared. "You did a good job, dearie," spoke Tess. "I'm going to want you for my department someday."

Monica could hardly think, her mind had raced through so many possibilities during this assignment. She barely listened as Lily praised her work, though noted that Monica was a little too hasty in coming to human form in the woods, where the Gestapo might have noticed her since they were still close to the checkpoint. "When will it all end," Monica wanted to know.

"Someday," Tess calmly asserted.

"I just can't believe...the warfare out there. Phew," Monica exhaled. Oh, for a little boy who's wandered away from home in peaceful America, she told herself, or a fishing boat lost at sea on the Great Lakes.

"It's tough for all of us, Angel Girl," agreed Tess. "But we just have to keep fighting, and the strong shall fail, the weak prevail, one battle at a time."