• 14Sep 09

  What's with the EPIC FAILURE DEMOS coming out?

  Ok, so I like to download demos once in a while, and I'm often impressed by what I play, but last week I got the worst 2 demos I've ever played.

  First, Katamari Forever.

  Well I haven't played the other katamari's, but my cousin was so impressed w this game that I decided to try it out.

  EPIC FAIL

  Took me quite a while to download and install the demo and what do I see? cheap graphics with a menu that reminds me of Mario Party. Then I had to figure how to move throughout the menu, which is truly awful. Went through the first selection of missions, with another menu that looked like mario galaxy. Chose the first and thought: "Oh well, it must not be so bad".

  Wrong.

  My HDTV shows me how a king-headed thing talking to me about a ball in the middle of the screen that is supposed to water a big dry garden. And here's the best part! It times me and sets me a limit to water! WHAT THE HECK? I know it's a demo BUT COME ON! I don't even know how to play the pathetic awkward game and you're already timing me! So as bored as I was I decided to give it a try.

  GOD!

  I've never had to play with such AWFUL controls! And the camera FAILS EPIC GOLDEN BALLS! I had to struggle so much to get the &%$&% ball out of the water! Then discovered how graphics and camera combined to make such a lame and punishingly hard level. Random stuff like animals, gifts, and palm trees would just pop out for no apparent reason. And at some points the game declared that my katamari was as big as "place number here" "place random animal here". So I struggled so hard with the same level and couldn't even get too close to the limit I was supposed to "water". After losing countless times, another random and senseless thing appeared. It seems that when you die, you enter a little old-school videogame, where you listen to the king's head while he throws volcano rocks at you. HOW COOL IS THAT? You're supposed to move and avoid them to set a highscore, which I doubt anyone would like to do after losing 5 mins of their lives trying to finish a #$%% level.

  Do yourself a favor and don't bother downloading this demo nor buying this game. Unless you're into ridiculously difficult and random senseless stuff (add some ugly graphics and camera to my order please.... no, no dessert thanks....).

  And after that, Star Wars: The Clone Wars.

  I've always been a fan of Star Wars, and I've enjoyed so much it's games as well: KOTOR2, lego star wars, TFU, Battlegrounds, ....

  I had NEVER, EVER been this dissapointed with a Star Wars videogame.

  When the menu pops up you see that you can choose to either play as a trooper or as a jedi. So let's go with the first one.

  When the game begins you find out it's a 3d game shooting for 2d gameplay. Aiming is just plain stoopid. and no matter how soft you push R2, it will always fire, which gets annoying after a while. Then you get really awkward cutscenes of Yoda giving you directions that in most cases don't fully explain what you're supposed to do. Really awful. but that's not the worse! OH NO!!!! have you ever seen a Star Wars PUZZLE videogame? I HAD NEVER seen one. Well here you go! You have to solve puzzles to override some random consoles. REALLY! WHAT THE HECK? And it keeps going like that until in the end a trooper suicides just to get you out of the ship. OH! HOW NOBLE OF A CLON TO DO THAT! *fakes tears*

  Then the jedi part of the demo. When you hear jedi, you assume it's an amazing part where you cut through epic enemies. Wrong. You just have to kill some random droids that appear out of nowhere while you try to figure out why are the controls not responding as they should. Some combinations aren't ver well explained by Yoda, so you're easily stuck on many parts of it. Well, aiming sucked, not big news, but what really bugged me was that you fall of the land randomly. Even if you do the double jump you can easily miss your target and fall into the abysm. Really dissapointing. Plus you have your useless padawan that doesn't do anything at all!

  After playing the demo for WET, Bomberman Ultra, and some others, I was really dissapointed and frustrated with the ones that came out last week. I BEG for the guys at PSN to play the demos before they actually release them.

  So yeah, I still can't believe I wrote all of this..... and it's awesome you even bothered to read it... or not.... whatev...

  Vimanesba

  • Posted Sep 14, 2009 6:47 pm PT
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