Here are my musings on videogames, as well as other nerdy topics.

• 10Mar 13

  Thought of the Day: Gaming, 10 May 13

  If Solid Snake had played Skyrim, he would know that the best way to sneak around is to put the box on an enemy's head.

  In case you're not the nerd I think you are, click here.

  • Posted Mar 10, 2013 4:21 pm GMT
  • Category: Games
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• 30Jan 13

  Thought of the Day: Gaming, 30 Jan 13

  More complaining follows.

  

  I can barely be brought to even care about this, but I don't see why anybody else would either. Anyone who has been wandering around in Oblivion or Skyrim thinking "Boy, this would be so much fun if a hoard of other players were wandering around with me" has obviously never played an MMO. Having a hoard of human players wandering around the world with you is not fun. It's so not fun that pretty much every modern MMO uses instances. They do this specifically so that there aren't a million other people trying to ruin you or your party's fun while you kill critters.

  Secondly, I didn't know there were many people itching to explore Tamriel in an MMO. If you don't know what Tamriel is, then A.) Thanks for making my point, and B.) Tamriel is the world in which the Elder Scrolls games take place. Tamriel does not have the same appeal of Star Wars, Middle Earth, or the Forgotten Realms. Even if it did, guess what? There are half a dozen games that already exist where you can explore Tamriel. MMOs aren't about exploring a world and reading lore books anyway. They're about grinding to max level for a year, then raiding high level dungeons with your guild, until you get bored and cancel your subscription.

  Finally, the mechanics of Elder Scrolls games do not translate to an MMO. The leveling mechanics won't work without drastic overhaul. I can grind my Blade skill in Oblivion to max level in a day. Most people who play an Elder Scrolls game to its conclusion probably have high levels in a number of skills. That doesn't work when trying to set up classes in an MMO. The open world setting doesn't work in an MMO for the reasons I mentioned above. When you take away the leveling system and the open world, what you're left with is not an Elder Scrolls game.

  It will however say "Elder Scrolls" on the box, so I'm sure Bethesda will make a fortune on sales and subscription fees. Go gamers.

  • Posted Jan 30, 2013 10:11 am GMT
  • Category: Games
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• 29Jan 13

  Thought of the Day: Gaming, 29 Jan 13

  Complaining follows.

  So I turn on my Xbox to play my 160th hour of Dark Souls, and I'm greeted by this on the main dashboard page:

  

  Sleeper hits. Far Cry 3 is a sleeper hit.

  

  Xbox dashboard editor: F*ck you. Shove your article up your ass. Far Cry 3 is not a sleeper hit. It's a game with a budget, marketing effort, and production staff larger than many films, and it's developed and produced by one of the biggest companies in the industry. It is the polar opposite of a sleeper hit.

  Where does nonsense like this come from? Do some gamers want to pretend that they're appreciating something artsy and independent, while they are in fact playing the very definition of a mainstream title? Here's what this reminds me of: In college, about 50% of the girls I ever went out with claimed to love "hole in the wall bars." When asked to identify a "hole in the wall bar," they would invariably list some gigantic monstrosity of a bar on Bardstown Road, one of the main nightlife areas in Louisville. Guess what: If a bar has two separate dance floors, four bars, shot girls wandering around everywhere, and a line at the door, it's not a goddamn hole in the wall bar.

  So yeah, I think that's what it is: People want to imagine that they are a connoisseur, someone who appreciates things rare and subtle, even if they are in fact a common, mass-market consumer. And also, Xbox dashboard editor: F*ck you. Take Far Cry 3 and put it where your article goes.

  • Posted Jan 29, 2013 2:36 am GMT
  • Category: Games
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