The Art of (Real-Time) War: Using Sun Tzu's principles for real-time strategy games.

• 15Jul 09

  I Can't Think of a Clever Title

  After the last blog, I told myself, "Self, don't write when you're feeling down. It looks bad."

  ...so, I didn't. See how that worked out (as in, nearly disappearing for a month and a half)?

  I also refuse to even think the words "it can't get any worse" (because it always can).

  At the end of the week that saw the deaths of Ed McMahon and Farrah Fawcett, and the recall of Michael Jackson to his home planet, I got a phone call from someone I hadn't heard from in 4 years, telling me to check the newspaper... specifically, the obituaries.

  That's how I found out a co-worker and good friend, who I hadn't seen o heard from since he went over to the Phillipines to do missionary work, had passed away.

  Now I remember why I was happy to leave that job: some people just don't know how to deliver bad news.

  Out of that long, fuzzy weekend of parties (my youngest graduated from pre-school) and funerals (well, more like a memorial service... no body, since the Phillipines hadn't released it yet), I got the distinct feeling that maybe... just maybe... it was time to kick myself out of my fugue and start living again.

  So... I got my mind back together. I tried to determine if it's a mid-life crisis, but decided the whole transition from midnight-shift convenience store clerk to programmer qualified nicely... since that's over: end of mid-life crisis.

  I also got dragged to another of my wife's concerts: REO Speedwagon, Styx, and .38 Special. Styx put on an outstanding show, but REO almost ruined it by making it political (is there anything more annoying than dealing with a preachy singer for 2-3 minutes between songs, when you are at the concert to escape from the crap he's preaching about?!?). .38 Special was... well, there.

  The highlight, though, was a special on tickets for Creed on August 11th. Looks like 5 of us (my wife, our oldest, his friend, one of my friends, and me) are going; it's going to be epic.

  In other news...

  I found some good books at a flea market on a road trip out in the middle of nowhere: State of Fear by Michael Crichton (it will change the way you look at global warming) and The Face That Must Die by Ramsey Campbell (has to be one of the most off-beat horror writers around... definitely an acquired taste). I also found a $5 copy of Jason X (awful movie I've seen several times... I saw it, and immediately had to have it) and Far Cry (finding a second-hand PC game anywhere is notable these days... makes me hopeful for the future of mankind).

  After seeing Styx, I hunted down a copy of Paradise Theatre on CD (oddly enough, my cassette seems to have disappeared). I'm happy.

  Finally... I'm writing an editorial by the end of the week (barring an intervention). Keep your eyes peeled.

  Have a good week, and stay warm.

  • Posted Jul 15, 2009 12:26 am PT
  • Category: General
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• 2Jun 09

  Don't Need Any More Months Like That, Thanks

  Once upon a time, I mentioned that I had very bad luck with cars. Unfortunately, that trend doesn't seem like it'll end any day soon.

  Last year, while on my way back from a job interview, the tread on my tire decided it was bored and parted from the tire itself. While I was driving the car. At 70 MPH.

  My first impression was, "****, that's loud." Next thought was, "I had better pull over, because it's really hard to steer."

  When I pulled the car over, I was shocked at the damage. The side marker light assembly was shattered, along with the lens. The tire was a total loss, and since I was leery of all tires at the time, I just replaced all four. Because I was still several miles from home and had no way of letting anyone know what had happened, I also got a cell phone for future emergencies.

  Immediate cost: $250.

  Fast forward one year...

  New York requires that you bring your car to an inspection station once a year so someone can slap on a sticker that basically says "My car is safe to drive." I always thought it was a completely stupid rule: if a car is unsafe, I simply won't drive it, and I resent the $25 (it used to be $10 until emissions tests were required with the inspection) you have to pay for the "service."

  In order to pass the inspection, you need all the lights and lenses intact. That meant I had to bring my car to an auto body shop to have them replace the damaged side marker light.

  Cost: $40.

  I picked up the car, and drove it home... and discovered, much to my dismay, that I was having a problem stopping. I had to jam my foot all the way to the floor in order to come to a stop.

  Not good. Not good at all.

  I waited until later that night (no traffic) and drove it across the street to the brake shop, and left it there along with a note to check the brakes, change the oil, and slap a sticker on to make me legal. I'm thinking it'll be a day (at most), about $1000 and NYS will be happy.

  They called the next afternoon with really bad news:

  That blowout? Turns out it did a number on the wheel bearing and spring on that side of the car. The broken spring cost me a strut on that side, too. Since the wheel bearing was wobbly, it caused to rotor to warp on that side and knock out the caliper as well.

  In order to get me legal again, they had to (essentially) replace my entire front suspension and brakes. They also slapped on the "I'm safe, so bite me" sticker as well.

  Cost: $2100.

  That brings the total to about $2350... all for one blown tire.

  I blame this on Seth Brundle. If he'd been smart enough to sweep for bugs, none of this would be necessary.

  It would have been easier to swallow if my PC didn't decide to get flaky on me at the same time: the cooling fan on my video card locked up (fortunately, I caught the problem before it fried the GPU) and XP decided it no longer likes my wireless mouse ("Fatal Error While Installing," even though it has worked perfectly since Super Bowl Sunday). I had to dredge up an old optical mouse to fill in while I puzzle out how to get the laser mouse to work (it might be a conflict with the wireless router; since I can't find the frequency data for the mouse, though, I can't be 100% sure on that).

  (Oh... no, it's not the mouse itself. I have it running fine on my laptop.)

  It wasn't all bad. I did manage to pry myself away from everything long enough to hit up a local CD store and pick up the latest Testament album (The Formation of Damnation is excellent; I've been listening to it a lot, and it refuses to get stale), a couple of older Testament albums (Souls of Black to replace my cursed cassette copy... long story... and First Strike Still Deadly) and replacements for two old Flotsam and Jetsam tapes (When The Storm Comes Down and Cuatro). Nothing will cheer me up like a good solid metal infusion.

  In all the confusion and chaos, my idea for my next editorial has flown off to Brazil. Hopefully, it sends a postcard.

  So... here's to a much, much much better June. It can't *nope, stopping right there before I jinx it*.

  • Posted Jun 2, 2009 5:47 am PT
  • Category: Cars
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• 9May 09

  Fallout Alert! and American Soldier Review

  Last night, I was out doing a bit of shopping and stumbled on something I hadn't expected: a "Fallout Trilogy" pack. It has Fallout, Fallout 2, and Fallout Tactics on one DVD for $20.

  Since I didn't have any of those (one of those weird oversights... I had plenty of opportunities to buy the first two games, and somehow never bothered), I jumped on it.

  I haven't installed it yet, so I don't know if there are any technical problems. I'm not in a big hurry to play it, either: after years of RTSs, turn-based anything bores me to tears.

  (Yes, yes, I know... I can recite the mantra: "Fallout should be turn-based and isometric"... and it is a cIassic... so I'll have to get over it.)

  "...and people sometimes lose their vision of where it all came from. They're sitting in the lap of luxury in a country built on three and a half million deaths..." Soldier's interview recording on "Unafraid."

  

  American Soldier- If you've listened to earlier Queensrÿche albums, it may be a bit of a letdown; taken on it's own merits, "American Soldier" is a powerful and musically-solid album.

  The styIe here is more progressive rock than progressive metal: slower tempos, down-key melodies, and easily-understood lyrics. This is probably a conscious choice considering the concept: songs that tell the story of a soldier, from his viewpoint. The most increble part of the album, though, is its lack of a stand on the current and past conflicts: it simply tells soldier's stories and lets the listener come to their own conclusions.

  According to the band, they conducted dozens of interviews with soldiers from World War II all the way up to Afghanistan and Iraq; they used recordings of the interviews in many of the songs. This gives the songs a sort of weight to the message that they otherwise wouldn't have.

  The album starts with "Sliver," a view of boot camp that had me flashing back over 20 ago to Navy basic training; the song is slow (boot camp is not slow) but intense (which they did get right). It's followed by the first of several stand-out tracks, "Unafraid:" the lyrics of the song are segments of two recorded interviews, one with a Vietnam veteran, and another from a Recon Marine from Somalia; the only singing is in the chorus. The contrasting views give the song an incredible power.

  "Hundred Mile Stare" is a bit too downbeat, but seems to be about pre-combat jitters (unless I'm listening to it wrong). "At 30,000 Feet" starts with a pilot's interview, and the slow-to-mid-tempo pace matches the tale of a bombing mission. "A Dead Man's Words" (standout #2) is slow-paced, but a unique, almost serpentine riff drives the song and sucks the listener in. "The Killer" (standout #3) is an odd-tempo song, but the almost-chaotic rhythm matches the inner conflict of a soldier asked to pull the trigger on another human being. "Middle of Hell" jars badly with it, however: almost too contemplative and dreamy to follow "The Killer."

  "If I Were King" (standout #4) has an incredible emotional impact from the outset: an interview with a Marine telling the story of a friend getting killed in combat. The song itself is about dealing with losing a friend in combat: contemplative, sad, and intense. You can't listen to this song without tearing up.

  "Man Down!" (standout #5) uses a variation of the sinuous riff in "A Dead Man's Words" to open, but changes to a more frantic, metalllic riff to tell the story of a soldier after he's back in "the world." "Remember Me" uses a simple melody and rhythm to tell the story of a soldier trying to hold together a marriage across thousands of miles and a war; it's not a great song, but holds its place regardless.

  The final standout is "Home Again," an emotionally-stirring duet with Tate and his daughter about missing your children when you're in combat. Although Emily Tate's voice seems to be a bit robotic in spots, the overall performance is incredible.

  ...and then you have "The Voice." I'm not sure how it fits into the album, and unsure what it's really about. It ends the album on a sort of "wtf?" moment.

  Rating: * * * ½ (song-by-song, it would be * * ½, but the whole is greater than the sum of it's parts)

  I'm currently contemplating a massive editorial, so keep an eye peeled. Cheers for now!

  • Posted May 9, 2009 12:47 pm PT
  • Category: General
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• 3May 09

  Musically Inclined: Mindcrime I and II

  "I remember now..."

  It was the spring of 1988. High school was fast becoming a distant memory. In another month or so, I would be shuffling off to Orlando, FL for basic training in the Navy (that boot camp no longer exists... it's a bit spooky if I think about it too much).

  I had purchased Queensrÿche's first 3 albums the year before, after hearing "Gonna Get Close To You" on MTV (when it still played music ) and liking the creepy vibe to it. Their styIe was unique: not quite metal, not quite... er... not metal? They referred to it as "avant-garde;" today, it's called "progressive metal."

  In '88, though, they released an album that changed the rules. It was deep, both musically and emotionally. It was socially and politically relevant (and remains so today). Most of all, it had a profound impact on me: having spent half of my life at the time living across the street from a prime nuclear target had left me a bit weary of the Cold War, and the move to the suburbs hadn't changed that.

  last.fm Queensrÿche page (Note: while Operation: Mindcrime is available in full, Mindcrime II isn't.)

  

  Operation: Mindcrime- This is the album that redefines progressive metal, and tells a deeply moving (and disturbing) story in the process.

  ***STORY SPOILERS FOLLOW***

  The story is one of misguided rebellion, damnation without redemption, and betrayal. The central figure is Nikki, a young heroin addict who is recruited into a secretive revolutionary organization (who's goals remain hazy throughout this album) run by Dr. X. He is given a gun, put in an apartment and called on to perform assassinations. Every once in a while, he is visited by a prostitute-turned-nun named Mary, and they fall in love.

  When he is ordered to kill Mary, he refuses, sparking his split from the organization. He tries to save Mary, but is unsuccessful; when he tries to run, he is caught by police.

  ***SPOILERS END***

  You know from the outset that there's no happy ending: "I Remember Now" is not a song, but an introduction to Nikki in a mental hospital (I assume; that point isn't made clear, but can be figured from the context). "Anarchy X" is a short instrumental that serves as an introduction to the album. "Revolution Calling" introduces us to Nikki, and is a powerful song of disillusionment with the system. "Operation: Mindcrime" inducts him in the order, weaving some rap elements with jazz and metal, with an overall slow tempo to give the listener a darker feel. "Speak" picks up the pace to almost frantic, panicky levels to reflect the street-preaching tone of the song. "Spreading the Disease" maintains the tempo, while intoducing us to Sister Mary, Nikki's "outlet." "The Mission" is an interlude: Nikki is between "contracts" and brooding about his next assignment, while waiting for Mary; it sets up the possibility that Nikki is conflicted about his role in the organization, as well as his obsession with Mary.

  "Suite Sister Mary" is the magnum opus of the album, though: after Nikki is given his mission, it starts with introspection, and becomes a duet between vocalist Geoff Tate and guest vocalist Pamela Moore (in the role of Mary). Since it takes place in a church, a choir is played in places in the background, which gives the whole song a very spiritual feel. Overall, the effect is very powerful.

  After that, though, the album takes a very slight dip: the second half is hard to listen to after the climax of the story is reached, and only bad things happen to the protagonist from that point on. However, the songs are important to the whole album, and are very good in their own right.

  "The Needle Lies" is frantic and angry, reflecting Nikki's feeling of betrayal and need to get away from Dr. X. "Electric Requiem" starts Nikki's slide into darkness, and is very spare, downbeat, and... short. "Breaking the Silence" tries to be sad and angry at the same time, but seems to come across as more defiant than either. "I Don't Believe In Love" (one of the singles from the album) is even more defiant: a long denial of Nikki's feelings for Mary; "Waiting for 22" acts as a sort of outro, and an intro to the next short track; "My Empty Room" is finally an acceptance of Mary's fate (3 songs too late).

  The payoff for getting through all that conflict is "Eyes of A Stranger." Even though it, too, was released as a single, it fully deserves its "best of" status: powerful, vocally brilliant, and a masterpiece technically. It stands alone very well; as the finale of the album, it's a true cIassic.

  Rating: * * * * (as a whole; taken song-by-song, I'd have to say * * * ½)

  I thought Mindcrime stood well on its own, but when Mindcrime II was announced, I have to admit that I was psyched for it. The first album was a lot to live up to, though...

  

  Operation: Mindcrime II-It's 18 years later, and although the band is mostly intact (the only change is the departure of Chris DeGarmo), the music isn't quite the same as the first album.

  ***STORY SPOILERS FOLLOW***

  Nikki has been locked up for 18 years, and is set for release. During that time, he has seen Dr. X in commercials for Xcide Pharmaceuticals, and realizes that his (admittedly warped) ideals were being used (abused, really) for profit, not real change.

  It's time for revenge. For himself, and for Mary.

  Long story short: he tracks down D. X, drags him into the church where Mary used to live, and kills him. Then, he kills himself.

  ***SPOILERS END***

  Much of the problem with Mindcrime II is in the plot. It's hard to believe an ex-convict is able to get away with what Nikki does in the course of the album; it's even harder to believe that the story can be wrapped up as neatly as it is in the CD. Suspension of disbelief is difficult to achieve and maintain, and the album suffers quite a bit for it.

  Another issue is Geoff Tate's vocals: the strain of singing full-out with Queensrÿche has definitely affected his voice, and the lack of his usual upper range is distracting.

  Nevertheless, the album is pretty good. Not great, though.

  "Freiheit Overture" and "Convict" are merely short introductory tracks. "I'm American" takes up the tempo early, a frantic look at how the world now seems in Nikki's mind upon his release. "One Foot in Hell" puts him back in the slums he started from, and the music reflects his anger and coming full-circle. "Hostage" and "The Hands" are annoyingly vague: they seem to chronicle a run-in with the law and a subsequent escape (though how a convicted murderer is allowed to escape from jail without a problem is way beyond me). "Speed of Light" reflects Nikki's confusion at the pace things are taking, or perhaps the pace at which events are unfolding (though, oddly enough, the song itself is down-tempo). "Signs Say Go" and "Re-Arrange You" start to move towards the confrontation with Nikki's nemesis.

  And then, finally, pay off. "The Chase" acts as a kind of counterpoint to "Suite Sister Mary:" although it is significantly shorter, it takes place in the same church, and is a duet (this time with Dr. X, played by Ronnie James Dio). The song itself is rapidly paced (almost panicky), and the differing viewpoints of Dr. X and Nikki act as mirrors to each other. Tense, powerful, and dramatic, "The Chase" is both a (sort of) satisfying climax and stand-out track.

  Sort of satisfying, because it's frustratingly unclear whether or not Nikki kills Dr. X without referring to the Wikipedia spoilers. "Murderer?" makes this even more confusing by refusing to spell out what happened (although the song itself is very well done; it seems like the rest of the album is just a warm-up and cool-down for those two songs). "Circles" segues out of the confrontation, and into how Nikki deals with it.

  ...or, really, how he deals poorly with it.

  The last third of the album feels slapped on. Although it's okay musically, it doesn't have the emotional impact of the last half of Mindcrime. The listener can actually skip to "All The Promises" and hear another stirring duet with Pamela Moore (reprising her role as Mary), and be done.

  Rating: * * ½ (it had big shoes to fill, and couldn't quite do it)

  Right now, I'm still deciding how I'll approach American Soldier. It's a very good album, and many of the songs are incredible (watch the video for "If I Were King"... the song is phenomenal), but I've been addicted to Mindcrime for about a week and a half and can't really give Soldier a proper listen.When I do, I'll post a review of it on it's own.

  • Posted May 3, 2009 12:15 pm PT
  • Category: Music
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• 26Apr 09

  American Soldier, SPORE, and Harper's Point... oh, and other stuff

  So... after about a solid month of Iron Maiden, two brain cells collided somewhere, and I got the urge to dig out my Queensrÿche CDs (all 4 of them ). Among them is one of my absolute favorite concept albums, Operation: Mindcrime, which I've been listening to almost non-stop since the end of the last IM review blog.

  (In fact, at the end of the week, I'll be putting my thoughts on that and Mindcrime II into a short review blog. Mindcrime confirmed for me that being independent politically was a wise move; it deserves its own place.)

  At least, I was until I wandered over to the local Wal-Mart for coffee, and decided to look in the CD section. Lo and behold, QR has a new album out!

  Of course, I snatched it up almost immediately.

  It's called American Soldier, and I like it almost immediately. The band took the time to talk to actual soldiers from WWII all the way up to the current conflict, recording some of them, and used what they found out to write a concept album. It takes no stand on war; it just tells the stories of soldiers. I'm hooked.

  I also picked up SPORE: Galactic Edition for the PC. The price was right (same price as the regular edition) and with the loosening of the restrictions they put on it, it seemed like a good idea.

  It's pretty good: a bit cutesier than I ususally play (cartoony-bright and cartoony-violent) but it sucks you in. While the early stages are somewhat shallow, the last stage is trickier than it has any right to be. I'll play it for a bit longer, and then write up a review.

  With the network TV season wrapping up, two shows have taken center-stage as "must-see:"

  One is "Deadliest Catch." Season 5 is shaping up to be as good as the previous four: one captain has to sit out the season with health problems; all four boats have had massive upgrades (the Northwestern captain put $800,000 into its repairs and upgrades); two shows in, and there's already a tragedy at sea (an 11-man cod boat is down, and one man is confirmed dead, with 10 missing)... it's a tough show to watch, but I find it rewarding on so many levels.

  The other is basically a 13-week-long murder mystery/slasher movie, "Harper's Point." Before the show, 6 people were murdered by a serial killer named John Wakefield. Years later, a resident of the island is coming home to get married to a rich family who vacationed there; among his guests is a woman who's mother was killed by Wakefield.

  Oh... and there's a killer who's depopulating the island. Again.

  So far, 3 weeks in, the body count stands at 6 (best kill: a man tied to the propeller shaft of the ferry to the island, with a scuba mask to keep him from drowning; propeller starts, man is sucked in... very clever).

  I have 2 suspects in mind (in fact, I believe 2 people are involved in the murders, working at cross-purposes). I won't give anything away... I'll just say that I don't think Wakefield is back, like some of the characters seem to feel.

  Last thing: NY is thinking of making gay marriage legal. I don't really care one way or the other about it, but I will say that it reeks of desperation on Gov. Patterson's part (his approval rating is somewhere in the teens, due to his miserable handling of the budget and economic crisis in the state: cutting jobs and funding for education, while taxing everything in sight and raising existing ones). This isn't a cause for celebration: the gay population of the state is being played as pawns for votes in next year's election. Hopefully, someone calls him on it, and the ploy fails. Miserably.

  And I thought he'd be an upgrade from Spitzer. Shame on me.

  That's all, folks. Have a great week.

  • Posted Apr 26, 2009 12:54 pm PT
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• 7Apr 09

  Musically Inclined: Iron Maiden (part 3)

  (part 1 can be found here)

  (cont'd from part 2)

  After the tour for Fear of the Dark wrapped up, Bruce Dickinson announced that he was leaving Iron Maiden to pursue a solo career. The band threw him a short "farewell tour" (which turned into two live albums, A Real Live One and A Real Dead One, which are currently available as a 2 CD set; at this time, I don't have it, and cannot review it because I haven't heard it). Once the tour was over, and Dickinson official out as lead singer, the band set about replacing him.

  To this day, I have no idea what they were thinking when they settled on Blaze Bayley. Really.

  Perhaps they were looking for a throwback to the di'Anno years. Perhaps Bayley mailed them death threats. It's also possible that they got someone else's audition tapes confused with his.

  No... I will never be confused with Bayley's number one fan.

  

  The X Factor: It may be unfair to compare Bayley to Dickinson, but when your singer is almost iconic and you replace him, you'd better be certain he'll stand on his own merits. Unfortunately, Bayley doesn't. His 5 or 6 note range isn't the problem so much as his utter inability to bring any feeling to most of the songs on X Factor.

  There are a few good songs on the disc ("Sign of the Cross" is probably the best song from the entire Bayley "era;" "Heart of Darkness" and "Blood On The World's Hands" are powerful and solid), but the overall feeling is one of a band playing "down" to the limitations of its singer.

  Another issue (Falling Down) is the repetitiveness (Falling Down) of many of the (Falling Down) choruses on the (Falling Down) songs. It may be (Falling Down) catchy, but (Falling Down) it gets old (Falling Down) in a hurry (Fall... ah, you get the point).

  For any other band, X Factor would have been an outstanding album... any other band but 'Maiden.

  Rating: * * ½ (post-Bruce hangover, and it shows)

  

  Virtual XI: ...one step forward... into a deep hole.

  There are 2 songs worth listening to ("The Clansman" and "Don't Look To The Eyes of a Stranger," the second-best song of Bayley's tenure). Everything else is abominable.

  Rating: * ½ (don't bother... 'Maiden "virtually" mailed it in here)

  One of the funniest moments I've had writing these reviews was going over the enhanced features of the CD re-issiues. On Fear of the Dark, the album's biography calls it "the last album" Dickinson would ever make with Iron Maiden...

  In 1999, Bayley left the band, reportedly for health reasons (supposedly due to his allergies, and how they affected his singing voice). Then, shocking news:

  Bruce Dickinson and Adrian Smith were returning to Iron Maiden. Not only that, but Jannick Gers was staying, making them a 6-man unit, with 3 excellent guitarists.

  Wow...

  

  Brave New World: From the beginning riff to the last note, Brave New World slowly restores your faith in the new line-up and makes you forget that guy who sang for 'Maiden while Dickinson was "on holiday."

  It starts slow, because "The Wicker Man" is a bit of a throwback to the last 2 albums' repetitive chorus issues; however, the music backing it is back to cIassic-era 'Maiden (also, if you can find it, there's a remixed version with a stronger chorus; I believe it's on Edward the Great). "Ghost of the Navigator" evokes the much-longer "Rime of the Ancient Navigator" in a good way, and "Brave New World" is contemplative and hopeful by turns. "Blood Brothers" feels like a "welcome home, band-mates" song for Dickinson and Smith; "The Mercenary" is like a darker version of "The Trooper."

  "Dream of Mirrors" is like another shot at making "Hallowed Be Thy Name," but less moody and more energetic. "The Fallen Angel" is like an alternate version of "Number of the Beast." The melody of "The Nomad" evokes an Arabic feel, making it exotic and a definite stand-out on the album; "Out of the Silent Planet" and "The Thin Line Between Love and Hate" close out the album on a down, but good, note.

  Rating: * * * (a welcome back to form)

  

  Dance of Death: Really, the worst part of the album is the cover... it's... words fail me.

  The music inside, however, is excellent for the most part. It takes the foundation laid on Brave New World and builds melodies and counter-melodies over it. The result is the beginnings of realizing the promise that retaining Gers meant.

  "Wildest Dreams" opens the album on an up-beat, positive note (it also was my unofficial "theme song" during my A+ and college courses ). "The Rainmaker" and "No More Lies" have power and feeling unseen since "Fear of the Dark." "Montsegur" (about a medieval battle and massacre) has a darker feel while staying upbeat. "Dance of Death" is my stand-out track on this disc: a tale of a man who stumbles on a sort of "tarantella" of the undead, woven with spiralling melodies, symphonic arrangements, and some of the best vocals on the album.

  "Gates of Tomorrow" is a bit of a let-down of a following track to "Dance," which is unfair to the song (it's quite good). "New Frontier" (as far as I know, the only song with McBrain in the writing credits) is a clever little tune with very powerful lyrics. "Paschendale" (another battle, this time in WWI) is another ballad, this time from the perspective of a soldier dying of his wounds in combat; it's a very moving song, and a stand-out in it's own right. "Face In The Sand" would have been much better if Dickinson had toned it down in spots: it comes across as a bit too "howly" (though not as bad as "Quest for Fire"). "Age of Innocence" begins to wind the momentum down a bit; "Journeyman" ends the disc on a soft note, uncharacteristically melancholy, but powerful.

  Rating: * * * ½ (an absolute masterpiece)

  

  A Matter of Life and Death: The last album by 'Maiden is just about perfect. It intertwines the themes of war and religion in ways that astound the listener, and the evolution of their new line-up continues to excel musically and lyrically.

  I could go song-by-song and point out what's good about them, but I'd end up repeating myself over and over. I will say that a few songs do stand out: "Brighter Than A Thousand Suns" has a riff that just sticks with you and some of Dickinson's best vocal work ever; "The Longest Day" (based on D-Day) is a phenomenal attempt at evoking the feelings of a soldier facing the assault on Normandy Beach; "For The Greater Good Of God" is introspective and pleading by turns, each well-written and played.

  Each time I listen to A Matter... I'm left awestruck by just how much better this album is than most of what's played on commercial radio... and just how little Dickinson's voice has changed in 25+ years (just how old is he now, and how does he still sound so bloody good?!?).

  Rating: * * * * (yes... it's THAT good)

  From what I can gather, 'Maiden are currently working on their 15th studio album. To say I'm eagerly awaiting it is an understatement.

  Related: One of my previous ratings "extravaganzas" was on a band that sounds a lot like Iron Maiden. If you haven't listened to anything by them, check out Iced Earth. They're a bit faster than 'Maiden, but the sound is remarkably similar. Also, their cover of "Hallowed Be Thy Name" is excellent.

  Jag Panzer, a band from Colorado (and, possibly, the subject of a future review blog) also share some of 'Maiden's characteristics, and have another powerful singer (Harry "the Tyrant" Conklin). Check them out. (Also, in one of those "only in metal" coincidences, Megadeth's current guitarist, Chris Broderick, was Panzer's lead guitarist up until a couple years ago.)

  Up next: The song is called "Halloween," not the band...

  • Posted Apr 7, 2009 6:46 am PT
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• 31Mar 09

  The Greatest Things... EVER!!!

  This is a list of the greatest things ever to grace our lowly planet. Everyone I know will definitely agree that the following list is just too staggeringly awsome to contemplate without blowing their minds!!!

  Best Movie EVER:

  
  

  "Return of the Killer Tomatoes" has George Clooney, genetically-engineered tomatoes that look human, and the best product placement of any movie ever made. If you haven't seen it, do not hesitate!!! Rent it NOW!

  Best Novel EVER:

  

  C'mon, now... novelizations of popular games are the pinnacle of literary genius. They take everything a game offers, and change it to make it 1000% better!!!

  Best Hardware EVER:

  

  The best computer ever made. You plug it in, turn it on... and nothing happens! Genius! Since it does nothing, your software is never incompatible, your hardware add-ons never fail, and it never crashes, locks up or BSODs!!!

  Best Software EVER:

  

  The ultimate OS!!! It ditches those messy drivers on shut-down (saving disk space) and gives you a genuine appreciation for the color blue!!! What's not to love?!?

  Best Game EVER:

  

  It has E.T., Reese's Pieces, and puzzles that would make any hard-core gamer truly appreciate the brilliant design of the game!!! Best of all, it can be had cheap (if you know where the left-overs are being safely stored... after all, this much awesome may be hazardous to the general public)!!!

  Best Band EVER:

  

  Absolutely the most underappreciated band of all time!!! So what if they didn't play any music... or sing their own songs? So what if the **** purists yanked their Grammy?!? They were GENIUSES!!!
  Best Person EVER:
  
  C'mon... so what if he asked his friends to start a race war so he could rule the world? Who can fault a guy for wanting to get ahead in the world?!?
  (Honorable mentions: Rod Blagojevich, Lindsey Lohan)
  Well... that's it... any more and your monitor will explode trying to contain the sheer incredibleness of this list!!!
  I hereby declare this day... being the first day of the month of April... to be "Best EVER Appreciation Day." Have a good one, and enjoy yourselves!!!

  • Posted Mar 31, 2009 10:45 pm PT
  • Category: Food
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• 22Mar 09

  Musically Inclined: Iron Maiden (pt. 2)

  (cont'd from part 1)

  The Powerslave album produced two very memorable things: a massive tour, and a quote that would come back to haunt the band.

  During the tour, 'Maiden taped one of defining live albums of all time:

  

  Live After Death: Ordinarily, I'd give my little "this is a live album, so not as good as the real thing" speech here, hand out a 3 or 3 ½ rating and move on. This album defies many of the rules, though.

  For one, it manages to capture most of the live experience. The power, the presence of Dickinson, even the odd mistake ("Aces High" is a bit faster than the album version, for example) are all captured perfectly. Even better, several di'Anno-era songs appear, performed by Dickinson, making the listener wonder what they would have sounded had he been with the band from the start.

  Rating: * * * * ("SCREAM FOR ME, LONG BEACH!!!")

  Caught on film in Poland during the Eastern European leg of the World Slavery tour:

  Polish fan: "I play your music all the time on my keyboard!"

  Bruce Dickinson: "You can't play metal on a keyboard!"

  

  Somewhere In Time:

  

  Okay... that might be a bit harsh.

  Apparently, 'Maiden didn't listen to Judas Priest's abysmal "Turbo" when they began recording "Somewhere In Time." This is both a bad thing, and a good thing.

  The backlash from using guitar synthesizers was almost immediate, and "Time" didn't do as well in the US as previous albums. One of the drawbacks of using synthesized sounds is an overall lack of "warmth" to the sound, which some artists (such as Gary Numan and Fear Factory) have capitalized on to give their songs a mechanical feel and evoke the coldness of an industrial world... something that 'Maiden isn't known for.

  However, I thought the album was very good despite the change in sound. The synth-guitars and bass allowed the band to experiment with their sound in ways that influenced later albums in astonishing ways.

  "Caught Somewhere In Time" introduces the new sound immediately, weaving the old 'Maiden with the new almost seamlessly, although the mix was a tiny bit uneven (the opening melody almost overpowers the backing rhythm guitars). "Wasted Years" abandons much of the synthesized guitars in favor of a more old-school approach, though the standard "life on the road" lyrics mar it slightly. "Sea of Madness" sounds slightly out of sync in places, but is overall a solid offering. "Heaven Can Wait" finally starts to realize the promise of the new technology, weaving the new sound seamlessly with the trademark 'Maiden sound, and makes it a stand-out track.

  "The Loneliness of the Long-Distance Runner" kicks off the second half of the CD strong, with the galloping riffs perfectly complimenting the lyrics of the song, making this another stand-out song. "Stranger in a Strange Land" uses the synth-sounds to evoke a dreamy, contemplative feel. "Deja Vu," however, is something of a momentum-killer, coming across as a bit flat. The album wraps up with "Alexander The Great," an epic song with epic lyrics and sound that, nevertheless, feels force-fit in places (think "To Tame A Land" from "Piece of Mind").

  Rating: * * ½ (experimental, with some serious growing pains)

  

  Seventh Son of a Seventh Son: This is one of my personal favorite albums of all time. The only flaw with it was its release: it coincided with the brilliant Operation: Mindcrime from Queensryche, so it tends to suffer a bit in comparison. Taken on its own terms, however, "Seventh Son" is a masterpiece.

  It's a concept album about a man (the title character) born with the ability to see the future. Throughout the album, his soul is fought over by God and Satan, and his experiences (seeing the future, but unable to change it or make people believe him) wear on him. It's hard to seperate any one song from the album and analyze it: each is important to the overall storyline. The experimentation on "Somewhere in Time" also paid off: the new technology is fully integrated into the band's repertoire and compliments 'Maiden's sound.

  "Moonchild" introduces the album and its concept, foreshadowing the seer's struggle from the Devil's viewpoint. "Infinite Dreams" is nicely contemplative and moody by turns. "Can I Play With Madness" is really the weakest track on the disc, though, since it seems solely to have been written as a single, but it still manages to advance the story and satisfy the listener. "The Evil That Men Do" caps the first half confidently.

  The title track starts the second half where the first left off, though at the beginning of the story (sort of a flashback). "The Prophecy" spells out the protagonist's struggle with some very clever vocal mixing, and "The Clairvoyant" comes across as contemplative and energetic (a rare feat). The album closes strong with "Only The Good Die Young," leaving you wondering, "How can they top this?"

  Rating: * * * ½ (a strong album only marred by the "made-for-single" "Madness")

  After the "Seventh Son" tour wrapped up, the band was left in flux by the departure of Adrian Smith and the beginning of Bruce Dickinson's solo career. To replace Smith, the band took on session guitarist Jannick Gers, who worked with Dickinson on his "Tattooed Millionaire" album (and, in a twist of fate, Fish's first solo album after his departure from Marillion). The resulting album...

  

  No Prayer For The Dying: I could sit here for hours explaining what's wrong with this album. Hell, I could spend DAYS on what's wrong with it. All you need to see, however, is the non-Derek Riggs cover and realize that the band essentially ditched everything they'd done right in the previous decade-plus, and put out what can only be described as a pop-heavy rock album.

  There are some redeeming tracks here: "No Prayer" is a nicely contemplative song, "Fates Warning" is as old-school 'Maiden as the album gets, and "Mother Russia" is a very timely piece with haunting lyrics and melody.

  The majority of the album, though, is bogged down in overly clever lyrics and titles ("Hooks In You?" "PUBLIC ENEMA NUMBER ONE?" "BRING YOUR DAUGHTER... TO THE SLAUGHTER?!?" Are you *bleep*ing KIDDING me?!?!) and recycled songwriting ("Tailgunner" is almost totally reworked from "Aces High").

  Rating: * (avoid it... think of the children you'll save!)

  

  Fear of the Dark:...or, "How we redeem ourselves after 'Prayer' disappointed you."

  This is a long album compared to earlier offerings. It was the first one specifically recorded for the CD format (which expanded times from 25 minutes per LP side, for 50 minutes safely pressed to vinyl, to almost 80 minutes). Consequently, there are several songs that exceeed the radio-friendly 4 minutes, and a few filler songs (to "fill out" the overall length). Despite the filler, however, the overall album is a vast improvement over "Prayer."

  "Be Quick or Be Dead" opens with cIassic 'Maiden energy, but "From Here to Eternity" (the last appearance of Charlotte the Harlot to date) kind of kills the momentum with pop-styIe vocal arrangements in the chorus. The haunting "Afraid to Shoot Strangers" starts well, but about half-way through becomes extremely repetitive (repeating the title over, and over, and over...). The Zepplin-influenced "Fear Is The Key" finally kicks off a string of well-written and -performed tracks, with the avant-garde metal "Childhood's End," the rock ballad "Wasting Love," and the Harris-penned "The Fugitive."

  Unfortunately, "Chains of Misery" kills the momentum with AC/DC-styIe gang lyrics which jar in contrast to 'Maiden's sound. "The Apparition" (another Zeeplin-influenced track) is well-written, with excellent lyrics that hint at what some of "Prayer" was aiming for (and missing). "Judas Be My Guide" (thought by some to reflect Dickinson's desire to branch off and pursue his solo career) evokes earlier 'Maiden, but "Weekend Warrior" regresses back to "Prayer" and it's overly-clever pop influence.

  The title track, though, wraps up the album on a truly inspired note, rivalling "Hallowed Be Thy Name" as a 'Maiden stand-out. The only thing that holds it back is the repetitive bit near the end (if they shaved about 15 seconds from the length, it would be perfect).

  Rating: * * * (too bad it followed "Prayer," and that its promise wouldn't be realized for several years)

  Up next: "The X Factor" to "A Matter of Life and Death," and... who the **** is Blaze Bayley?!?

  • Posted Mar 22, 2009 11:45 am PT
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• 14Mar 09

  Musically Inclined: Iron Maiden (part 1)

  Definite change of plan: I found Iron Maiden and Killers in a local music store, and couldn't listen to much else but 'Maiden all week. While they're fresh in my mind, I thought I would launch into this series of reviews.

  I might get back to Marillion at some point: there are some good CDs after Fish left, and I still have 3 of Fish's solo albums I'd like to share my opinion of.

  So... without further ado...

  Iron Maiden's last.fm section (Full albums are available for listening here)

  The Official Iron Maiden site

  I was late getting into Iron Maiden. I'm not really sure why I wouldn't listen to them when they first became popular: maybe it was the images of Eddie with the Devil on marionette strings... or the music was just so different from what I was used to listening to at the time... or perhaps it was my subconscious mind saying "You're just not ready for this... wait until you can appreciate it."

  Whatever the reason was, I didn't begin listening to them until Powerslave was released. Even then, it took a performance of "2 Minutes to Midnight" by a high-school cover band to actually run out and buy a copy. I've been a fan ever since.

  When I describe the band to people who (shockingly) haven't heard of them, words tend to fail me. "Literate" springs to mind, as well as "melodic," "awesome" and "enduring." Formed in the late '70's, they still continue to make excellent music even today.

  The band began in 1975(!) and, after many line-up changes, released their first album in 1980. The initial line-up for "Iron Maiden" was Paul di'Anno (vocals), Dave Murray (guitars), Dennis Stratton (guitars), Steve Harris (bass), and Clive Burr (drums).

  

  Iron Maiden: The debut album has one small flaw to it: the sound quality is a bit too flat, leaving much of the "life" out of the music. It's a small nit-pick, however, given the quality of the songs themselves.

  Much of what makes Iron Maiden what they are is present on this album: galloping riffs, tight playing, intricate melodies. The lyrics aren't the same quality as later releases, but the seeds of genius are there.

  Overall, listening to this CD gave me a strong feeling of hearing side one of Golden Earring's Moontan. This isn't a bad thing by any stretch... just a bit strange, given the difference in genre between the two bands.

  "Prowler" opens the album strong and fast, followed by a punk-influenced "Sanctuary." "Remember Tomorrow" changes the mood to dreamy and contemplative, before the teen-anthem "Running Free" picks up the pace again. "Phantom of the Opera," an epic-length retelling of the novel, finally gives the listener a real glimpse of what the band will become in later years: turn-on-a-dime time changes, smart lyrics, and multi-layered melodies make this the stand-out track on the disc.

  "Transylvania" continues with a solid instrumental, which segues into the dreamy "Strange World." "Charlotte the Harlot" puts in an appearance next (which she will two or three more times in IM's career... >_> ). Finally, the title track closes the album on a strong note, making the listener want to re-load the disc and play the whole thing all over again.

  Rating: * * * ½ (a very strong debut, marred by the strangely flat sound)

  After touring on their debut, Dennis Stratton was let go. Not only wasn't he adapting to life on the road very well, there were creative differences as well. His replacement, Adrian Smith, appears on the next album...

  

  Killers: Even though only a year separates the two albums, the sound takes a quantum leap in quality. It makes a big difference: this release feels more "alive" than the debut. The melodies evolve from the debut, too, and the playing gets a bit tighter.

  "Ides of March" opens the album on a strong note, and the addition of Smith's technically-superior quality is immediately apparent; "Wrathchild" remains a cIassic today, but opening the album with its stand-out track ultimately hurts the overall experience.

  "Murders in the Rue Morgue" continues the trend of adding songs based on cIassic literature, and does so very well. "Another Life," while musically decent, just ends poorly and abruptly. The instrumental "Ghengis Khan" takes the listener on a wild ride, but "Innocent Exile" drops them off abruptly in a self-pity-party.

  The title track opens the second half of the album back where the Khan began his ride; "Prodigal Son" sends us into dreamy contemplation... probably at exactly the wrong point, as it seems wrong for this point in the album. Fortunately, "Purgatory" picks the pace back up; "Twilight Zone" reins it back in, but the singing feels a bit sloppy compared to most of the rest of the disc. The album wraps up with "Drifter," and by this point I'm sort of relieved the album is over.

  Rating: * * * (an evolution of sorts, but with some real let-downs)

  By the close of the "Killers" tour, di'Anno's behavior became increasingly self-destructive, and his performances began to deterirate. He followed Stratton out the door, and the band hired The Man: Bruce Dickinson.

  

  (Author's Note: I'm on really dangerous ground with this review. "Beast" is considered by many to be the most amazing album on the planet by many; I could take the safe route, slap * * * * on it and call it a day... but, knowing what's to come, and not known for taking the "safe route," I'll do it anyway. )

  The Number of the Beast: Right from the opening track, it's readily apparent why Dickinson was chosen for the vocalist position. He brings range, power, and feeling to the songs, in ways di'Anno (a good vocalist) could only dream of. Also, it could just be me, but the rest of the band seems to improve just in response to the superior singing.

  The songwriting also improves dramtically: the lyrics and melodies just seem to compliment each other much better, and the technical level takes a huge leap.

  "Invaders" opens the album with AUTHORITY; "Children of the Damned," slower and a bit more contemplative, nonetheless continues the album well. "The Prisoner" picks the pace up, and adds some of the best drumming on the album. "22 Acacia Avenue" continues the chronicles of Charlotte the Harlot, and closes the first half of the album on a solid note.

  The title track (which you have likely heard, unless you have been hiding in a cabin in the Amazon for your entire life) and "Run To The Hills" open the second half. "Gangland" is really the only let-down for me on the disc, with a repetitive chorus that just jars in comparison to the rest of the album (although "Run To The Hills" sort of suffers from that as well). "Total Eclipse" (a bonus track on the re-release) should have been included on the original album: it compliments the album very well.

  The absolute stand-out track on the album, however, is "Hallowed Be Thy Name." At turns moody and angry, "Hallowed" tells the tale of a condemned man awaiting execution. From the opening notes to the closing wails, it remains one of Maiden's best songs, bar none.

  Rating: * * * * (though not "perfect," or even their best album, "Number" is a "must-have" for any hard-rock or heavy metal fan.)

  The final line-up change for a long time occured shortly after the "Beast" tour: Clive Burr left due to personal/scheduling conflicts. He was replaced by Nicko McBrain (I believe it's pronounced "Mick-Brine," but I can't confirm that).

  

  Piece of Mind: With each new addition, 'Maiden just kept improving musically, technically, and lyrically. McBrain brought a creativity to the drums that Burr approached.

  However, it doesn't save all of Piece.

  "Where Eagles Dare" blows you away from the outset: McBrain just astounds me with the drum track on the song. "Revelation" slows the pace a bit, but speeds up about a 1/4 of the way through. "Flight of Icarus" soars with its protagonist, and "Die With Your Boots On" brings a sly humor to the album with its take on "end-of-the-world" prophecies. "The Trooper" gallops along with the Charge of the Light Brigade from the Crimean War.

  ...and then the album just falls apart.

  "Still Life" doesn't know whether it's contemplative or scary, and fails at both. "Quest for Fire" is unnecessarily "howly" (if that's a word), and "Sunlight and Steel" just seems to recycle too much of "The Trooper." By "To Tame a Land" (about Frank Herbert's "Dune") the chemistry is lost; it doesn't help that the lyrics feel forced into place to fit the music, which it seems to fail at in several places.

  Rating: * * (despite some strong tracks in the first half, it just doesn't hold it together long enough to leave a good impression)

  

  Powerslave: Everything about this album is incredible, from the cover (on the original LP-sized slipcase, the detail level was astonishing) to the music.

  "Aces High" opens the album rapidly, and remains the only song to get me out of a speeding ticket (it was blaring when I was pulled over for doing 70 MPH in a 55 MPH zone; the policeman was a 'Maiden fan, and confessed that he, too, was prone to exceeding the limit when "Aces" was on the radio... I couldn't make that up if I tried ). "2 Minutes to Midnight" is a definite "made-for-radio" song, and suffers slightly for it... but only slightly. The instrumental "Losfer Words (Big 'Orra)" evokes the earlier "Transylvania" and "Ghengis Khan" in a good way. "Flash of the Blade" (featured on a horror movie soundtrack... but I forgot which one, and I don't remember the movie... ) is a bit average lyrically, but technically brilliant. "The Duellist" closes the first half on an (slightly) epic note.

  "Back in the Village" opens the second half on an up-note, with a "hold-on-to-your-chair" riff. The title track opens with a spooky heartbeat, breathing, and a howl/laugh that sets the tone for this tale of a pharoah contemplating his imminent death.

  Really, though, the rest of the songs only seem to be appetizers for the 13-minute-long epic "Rime of the Ancient Mariner," based on the Coleridge poem of the same name. Every trick in 'Maiden's playbook makes an appearence on this song: strong, literate lyrics; tight time changes; brilliant riffs... this is the stand-out track of the album.

  Rating: * * * * (I actually feel that this is better than "Number of the Beast" in every way possible )

  Next week: part 2, from "Live After Death" to "Fear of the Dark"

  • Posted Mar 14, 2009 2:27 pm PT
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• 10Mar 09

  Watchmen: A Review

  Tonight, I went to see "Watchmen" with my friend and my son.

  Despite warnings that the material might be too mature for kids, I determined that my son could handle it: he's in high school now, and knows enough to process what he saw on-screen.

  What he couldn't seem to handle, however, was the running time: about 2 ½ hours overall. I like movies that length (and longer) because I feel like I get my money's worth from them; he seems to get bored after the "normal" 90 minutes, unless the movie is really good.

  Was it "really good?" My feelings about it are mixed, and a bit colored by the graphic novel (which I read last week in anticipation of seeing the movie).

  Story was kind of incidental to the overall theme of the movie. It takes place in 1985, at a critical juncture of the Cold War (the invasion of Afghanistan). The history of "Watchmen's" world is different: masked vigilantes were commonplace, and embraced up until 1977 (when they were outlawed by Congress); the US won in Vietnam thanks to the intervention of the only "true" superhero, Dr. Manhattan; and Nixon is still president (and in his 4th or 5th term).

  The movie starts with the death of the Comedian, the most controversial of the "masks." He's an amoral killer, an attempted rapist, and a some-time assassin for the US government. His past is checkered; his murder alerts the one remaining operating masked vigilante, Rorschach, to a possible plot to kill the last remaining "masks."

  Throughout the movie, the pasts of most of the major "heroes" are examined in flashbacks, showing that all is not well in these individual's worlds. All of them have major flaws; none are what we might call "heroes" in the purest sense of the word.

  Part of the problem, however, is the movie doesn't go far enough in probing what makes these men and women who they are. Much or Rorschach's past and motivation is left out, for example; the book makes him much clearer.

  The characters, which are the focal point of the movie and novel, are fascinating... but not as much as I'd have liked. While the Comedian and Dr. Manhattan are examined relatively thouroughly, they are mostly off-screen and their influence on the plot minimal. The players with the most screen time (Rorschach, Nite Owl, and Slik Spectre) are barely examined at all, and Ozymandias just blurts out his backstory without preamble. It's a borderline-criminal waste of the source material.

  However...

  The effects make up for it to a certain extent. The action is well-choreographed, the scenes with Archie and Dr. Manhattan (while obviously CGI) are, to-date, the most "real" I've seen in a big-budget film.

  Regarding the controversial "full Monty" shots of Dr. Manhattan: I found that you really had to stare hard to make out if he was "anatomically correct." His coloration tended to obscure that part. Anyone who complained about it or obsessed about it has much deeper issues than the Comedian or Rorschach.

  Where the movie truly shines, however, is the music. I've never seen music as a story-telling device done as well as it was in "Watchmen." From "Unforgettable" playing in the opening fight scene to "Everybody Wants To Rule the World" playing in the background Muzak during Ozymandius' monologue, the songs help move the story along in ways I'd have never thought of.

  Overall I'd give it * * ½. It's not bad, but it could have been much better. I'd recommend picking up the graphic novel instead, which was a thoroughly engrossing read (I couldn't put it down for 10 straight hours).

  If you do choose to see the film, be warned: it is very bloody and violent. It's not exploitative like, say, "Jason X," but it does reach that level at times. There is also one very graphic sex scene... nothing on the level of, say, "Basic Instinct," but it is there.

  • Posted Mar 10, 2009 10:04 pm PT
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• 7Mar 09

  Musically Inclined: Marillion (The Fish Years)

  last.fm Page

  Official Site

  Before I became a fan of hard rock and heavy metal, I listened to cIassic rock stations. A lot of their broadcasts were dedicated to the pioneers of today's rock, which is why I have some odd bits floating around my collection (several tapes by Rush, Genesis, and The Police, to name a few).

  The best station in the area at the time, WPYX or PYX106, went one step further, and played some of what they thought would become "cIassic" among the popular songs and bands on pop radio. It wasn't unusual to hear Phil Collins' latest collaborations among the Zepplin blocks ("Easy Lover," anyone?). In this way, I was introduced to band I ordinarily wouldn't give a second thought to.

  One of the songs that got rotation in 1985 was a somewhat saccharine love song by an unknown British band that I totally mistook for Collins-era Genesis (similar styIe, similar vocalist). It set itself apart from the usual run-of-the-mill love ballad, however, with a poetic sensibilty that was almost visual, and a much different rhythm.

  The song was "Kayleigh," and the band was Marillion.

  Part Genesis, part Pink Floyd, part The Who... it's hard to pin a genre on these guys, especially in their early years. The closest I've seen to a category is "neo-progressive" or "neo-prog," and even that seems a bit useless a description.

  Over the years, I've collected as many of their CDs as I could lay hands on... no easy feat, as their popularity in the US was fleeting (after "Kayleigh" and "Incommunicado," their radio airplay dried up, and news of the band's releases was incredibly hard to come across). It wasn't unusual to stumble on a new disc as long as a year after it was released. Thanks to the internet, I've been able to keep tabs on what's released next and when.

  Another interesting tidbit: the 2 most expensive discs in my collection are Marillion-related: "B'Sides Themselves" was $35, and Fish's first solo album, "Vigil in a Wilderness of Mirrors," was $30. Both were imports, not for general sale in the US. Both were worth every penny.

  (I think my wife paid $25 for "Real to Reel" at a local music store; she's just as big a fan as I am. I believe introducing her to Marillion is one of the bigger reasons she agreed to date me in the first place... )

  There is one more astonishing (to me, at least) bit of trivia attached to Marillion... but I'll tell you that a bit later.

  The first part of my look at Marillion is their earliest albums, with Fish (aka Derek Dick... with a name like that, I'd take a stage-name, too ) as lead singer. During this period, the band was much more experimental and political, which may explain why they never caught on with American audiences the way other popular bands of the '80s did. I'll also look at the first albums Fish and Marillion did after their less-than-amicable parting, because each still influenced the other after the split to a remarkable extent.
  

  To the music:

  

  Script for a Jester's Tear: Despite being a short album (only 6 songs), "Script" packs a lot of mileage into those songs. It starts with a love song (the title track), but the arrangement sets it apart from the typical "bubble-gum pop" ballad, with lyrics and musicianship that makes it clear that this is not simple pop music. "He Knows You Know" is a subtly-creepy about death and drug addiction; "The Web" is a haunting tune about loneliness. "Garden Party" is a sarcastically-cheerful poke at high society, and probably the best song on the album. "Chelsea Monday" is a downbeat song about dreams unfulfilled. The finale, "Forgotten Sons," is a bitter anti-war song and a fitting end to an amazing debut album.

  Throughout the disc, the lyrics remain surprisingly visual, and the music itself compliments them with odd time signatures and haunting melodies.

  Rating: * * * * (yes, I gave a debut album 4 out of 4 stars... it's that good)

  

  Fugazi: The overall theme of this album seems to be "bitterness," and the mood drags down the otherwise-excellent songs on the album. When I think "sophomore slump," the first album that always jumps to mind is this one.

  The best track, "Assassing," opens the disc strong, with Marillion's signature odd timing and melodic sensibilty. Things start to turn sour thereafter: "Punch and Judy" and "Jigsaw" seem simple and bland, although their subject matter (break-ups) isn't. "Emerald Lies" is an almost forgettable tune about a cuckolded husband, and "She Chameleon" and "Incubus" almost seem to be taking stabs at the cheating wife. The title track mercifully wraps up the album, but fails to save it entirely.

  Rating: * *

  

  Real to Real: Pretty much a typical live EP. It's only real value is the inclusion of two songs that, at the time I got the tape, were unavailable anywhere else ("Cinderella Search" and "Market Square Heroes").

  Rating: * * *

  

  Misplaced Childhood: This is the album that introduced me to the band, and consequently, it's hard to review this one impartially.

  It's a concept album about a broken musician/revolutionary reviewing the life he's lived, and trying to find the fire he once had. Shades of Pink Floyd and very early Genesis are found at every turn, and the poetry of the lyrics is, at turns, sad and yearning, angry and bitter, or happy and hopeful.

  It's not an easy listen: song breaks are hard to pin down, as each side seems to be one long narrative without pause. Side one ("Pseudo Silk Kimono"/"Kayleigh"/"Lavender"/"Bitter Suite"/"Heart of Lothian") is the more "conventional" side, with two single-worthy songs worked into the overall tapestry. Side two ("Waterhole (Expresso Bongo)"/"Lords of the Backstage"/"Blind Curve"/"Childhoods End?"/"White Feather") is much more experimental, and less accessible, but better musically and lyrically.

  Rating: * * * ½ (* * * * for me, though... )

  

  Clutching at Straws: Although it's not represented as a "concept album" per se, "Straws" is one in spirit: all the songs are told from the point of view of a bar patron at "Happy" Hour. The result is... mixed.

  Part of the problem is the frictions within the band during recording that would result in Fish leaving after the tour for "Straws." Another part is the overall negative (and depressing) tone of the album. Mostly, however, is the burden of following up the brilliant and successful "Childhood."

  There are a few stand-out tracks (the self-parodying "Incommunicado," the haunting ballad "Warm Wet Circles," and the sad-but-relevant tale of the laid-off worker, "Sugar Mice"), but it's tough to listen to overall.

  Rating: * *

  

  B'Sides Themselves: Is this collection of B-sides to popular singles worth the money I paid for it? Hell, yeah!

  "Grendel" alone is worth the money: an epic-length song sung from the point of the creature itself. "Charting the Single" is a bit tame, but lyrically brilliant (I especially like the line that starts "Home is where the heart lies/But when the heart lies, where is home..."). "Market Square Heroes" is a working-cIass anthem that, surprisingly, didn't make it over to the US; "Three Boats Down from the Candy" is another subtly-creepy ballad. "Cinderella Search" is a deceptively-cheerful-sounding song about pickup lines (I think); "Lady Nina" is a love song to a prostitute (I couldn't make that up if I tried). "Freaks" and "Tux On" are kind of forgettable, but the album finishes with a strong live track ("Margaret") that gets you singing along and smiling.

  Rating: * * *

  

  The Thieving Magpie (La Gazza Ladra): The title is kind of odd: it doesn't explain that this is a live double-album, and has nothing to do with the songs on the album itself.

  It's a pretty good album, though, with a nice selection of tracks, and a live performance of the entire "Misplaced Childhood" album. The standard "it's live, but not live" complaint applies, but not as much as it does with other live albums (as Marillion has rarely toured where I could see them,, so this is my only real exposure to their live performances).

  Rating: * * *

  

  Seasons End: Imagine my surprise at purchasing this album, and finding out that the band had a new vocalist (Steve Hogarth, or "h"... even after 20 years as their vocalist, I still think of him as "the new vocalist"). Not only that, but Hogarth's voice was radically different from Fish.

  The result was a warming-up period to the disc that spanned about 10 years. Consequently, it still remains one of my least favorite Marillion albums.

  Objectively, it's not a bad album. Some tracks stand out as winners ("Easter," "The Uninvited Guest" and the metal-sounding "Hooks In You"), but much of that can be attributed to the lingering Fish influence.

  Rating: * * * (unless you're me... then it's * *... no, I don't adjust easily)

  Official Fish site

  

  Vigil in a Wilderness of Mirrors: Never has a solo career been more confusing for me to follow. Part of the problem is the singer's anti-American stand (making his solo albums hard to follow), but most of it can be laid at the feet of a Vermont-based jam band named... Phish. I had to ask record-store clerks several times for the latest release by "Fish, not Phish" and get blank stares until I spelled it out.

  "Vigil" was tricky to get because it didn't get a general American release: I had to haunt the import bins at several stores until it turned up. When I did manage to purchase it, it lived up to most of my expectations.

  The rhythms and melodies of Marillion can be heard to a certain extent, but much of the "magic" of the band's releases is absent. Also, it's clear where much of the bitterness and anger in Marillion's lyrics came from: without the band to temper his ire, "Vigil" comes across as several rants with no real humor to soften the blow.

  And now... the surprising fact I teased earlier: Two of the tracks on "Vigil" ("Family Business" and "View from the Hill") were co-written/arranged by Jannick Gers of Iron Maiden. Who says music isn't universal?!?

  Rating: * * ½ (* * * if you can get past the anti-US "Big Wedge")

  Next up: The rest of my Marillion collection... just because "Seasons" was such a disappointment for me doesn't mean the band totally died to me.

  Also... I still have 3 other Fish albums. Just because he left the band, doesn't mean he's not important as well.
  

  • Posted Mar 7, 2009 4:37 pm PT
  • Category: Music
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• 4Mar 09

  So... What Am I Working On Next?

  First, for those of you who are wondering: I finally managed to stop playing "Space Siege."

  *cue chirping crickets*

  I finally got around to loading up and starting "Halo" on the PC. I have only one thing to say about it:

  What's the BIG DEAL?!? It's an average FPS at best. The only "oooo... ahhhh..." I've gotten out of it was being able to max out the graphics on it.

  "Half Life" and "Half Life 2" blow it out of the water. 'Nuff said.

  Moving on...

  I'm still giving some of my older CDs a second listen for my next music review extravaganza. No, it's not a metal band... if you're American, odds are you've never heard of them... and they're the largest piece of my music collection. I should have part one (of 3, I think) up this weekend, barring a major disaster.

  I'm still on the lookout in my local music stores for the missing 5 studio albums of my Iron Maiden collection. I did get a copy of "Fear of the Dark" (to replace the cassette) and "A Matter of Life and Death." Now all I need is the self-titled debut, "Killers," "No Prayer for the Dying," "The X Factor" and "Virtual XI" ("Killers" and "Prayer" will be replacing totally worn-out tapes).

  I managed to find some good bargains at Wal-Mart for movies: "Hellraiser" (has it really been 20 years since it was released?!?), "The Mist" (good movie... real downer of an ending), "Say Anything" (chick flick, date movie... my wife likes it, so I don't care), and "The Dark Knight" (loved it in the theatre). I'm currently searching for "Troll 2" (it came up a lot last blog... ) and "Toxic Avenger" (I'd almost forgotten that movie...). Like I said: I'm an absolute sucker for a bad movie.

  Not much else going on, so I'll cut it short. Have a safe week, secure in the knowledge that spring is almost here (unless you're Australian... then I am truly sorry, but autumn is almost there).

  • Posted Mar 4, 2009 4:55 am PT
  • Category: General
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• 13Feb 09

  It's A BAD Game... Why Do I Like It?!?

  I love bad movies.

  Really bad movies.

  I'm not talking about the ones made by the Alleged German Director Who Shall Not Be Named. (I watched 5 minutes of "House of the Dead" one night, and shut it off when my brain tried to crawl out of my skull and strangle me with my medula oblongata.) They aren't "movies" as I understand them, but tax shelters. Tax shelters have no soul.

  I'm not talking about big-budget Hollywood box-office flops, either. You can throw millions of dollars at any film, but if the director is bad, or the cast is just there for the payday, or the script is just Variation #17A on Theme #1701, it's going to tank regardless.

  No... I'm talking about the shoestring-budget, Z-list cast, barely-scripted direct-to-video B movies. The critics hate them... "true" film-goers avoid them like they're contagious and lethal... and I gobble them up.

  To be fair, my personal movie collection has many critically-acclaimed works such as "Seven Samurai" and "Lord of the Rings" (both versions), and I enjoy them for the works of cinema they represent.

  It also contains some very questionable movies, however. How many of you have heard of "Trick or Treat," for example (no, it's not a "Halloween" rip-off... it might have been better if it was)? Or "Kentucky Fried Movie" (the centerpiece of which is a deliberately-bad, note-perfect spoof of "Enter the Dragon")?

  The centerpiece of my "disasterpiece" collection:

  

  I couldn't tell you why I like this movie. I hated it in the theatres, but I bought it as soon as it hit DVD.

  One of these days, though, it shall be supplanted by the Avatar of Awful Movies... "Plan 9 From Outer Space." Everything about "Plan 9" was terrible... and yet, it was so awful, it was AWESOME. I've only seen it twice, but I can still quote from it (best line ever: "With all due respect, sir, how do you expect me to do my job if I don't believe in what I see... and shoot at it?").

  When it comes to games, though, I tend to be a lot more critical. (See? I was going to make the gaming connection eventually... )

  My tastes run in the "mid-range" of the critics' scales: about 7.0-9.5. I might diverge from their scores a point or so when I rate them later, but that's normal for anyone (if you can find two people who agree perfectly on everything, let me know).

  For me, there's absolute nothing more frustrating than playing someone's alleged game... unless it's patching that game multiple times (if there is a patch), and it's still broken beyond belief.

  I can live with "low-quality" graphics (I grew up with 2D sprites with maybe two animations to their name, like "Space Invaders"). I can tolerate bad sound effects (I could write volumes about the problems I have with the sound effects in most games... but that's not the point here ). I cannot (and will not) forgive a game that has bad game play, though.

  At least, I thought I couldn't...

  A few weeks ago, I saw "Space Siege" on the clearance rack at a local discount department store. The fact that the game was released only 5 months ago, and was marked down almost 75%, probably should have been a warning that it was going to be a disappointment. The GameSpot rating (5.0) should have sent up red flags.

  It's from Gas Powered Games, though. I've put a lot of hours into "Dungeon Siege" and "Dungeon Siege 2." I just had to see if it was as bad as GS made it out to be.

  ...and it wasn't...it was worse. MUCH worse.

  The long story can be found here. The short version: it has all the depth of a Paris Hilton interview, and all the fun of rapidly slamming your hand repeatedly with a ball-peen hammer. It's as if the development team took one look at the design documentation, shrugged, and said "If we toss 90% of this (stuff), we can finish three months early and take an early vacation. Does the Bahamas sound good to you guys?"

  And yet... I still play it. I can't figure out why, but I do.

  It's as if there's a small, masochistic imp inside my skull that takes great and twisted pleasure in seeing which "feature" (QA people call them "bugs") gets me killed next: the camera controls mapped to the usual movement controls, the cursor losing the target (or obscuring it), or throwing a grenade down the hall and completely missing the enemy... yet miraculously hitting the explosive barrels and triggering a chain reaction that ultimately ends 3 pixels from my character.

  Or, maybe, all those years of watching "Motel Hell" and "jason X" have finally infected the "gaming" section of my brain.

  I'm don't even have the excuse that I thought it was better than avertised, like some of the other user reviews seemed to suggest.

  I decided to ask some of the GS community what THEY did with "bad" games. I got some interesting answers (amid the usual "trade it in" answers), my favorite being from mattykovax ("Turn it into a drinking game!" ).

  At the root of all of this, however, is the recurring (in my head, at least) question:

  What makes a game "BAD?"

  Unfortunately, like many of life's important questions ("What's the meaning of life?" "Where do I go when I pass on?" "Where does the other sock go when I put them in the dryer?"), it remains unanswerable... simply because each gamer is different.

  Ask one person, and he'll tell you "Anything that's like 'Oblivion.'" Ask another, and he'll tell you "Anything on the XBox360/PS3/Wii/*insert other console they don't own here*." Ask a third, and he might tell you "There aren't any bad games... I like every game I've ever played!" A large, vocal section of our community will inevitably shout "Anything by EA!!!"

  My answer would be "Anything with broken controls, a terrible camera that blocks out all view of the enemy, and RPG elements that don't really do anything." I'd abbrieviate that to "Space Siege."

  Even the most broken games in existence have some kind of cult following, though, much as "The Rocky Horror Picture Show" enjoys (or enjoyed... I'm not sure it's still playing in theatres anymore since it was released on DVD). If you don't believe me, just click here (*WARNING!!! The rest of the site contains strong language). It's like the brokeness appeals to some gamers, for reasons no one (possibly not even them) can fully explain.

  In a similar vein, however, is the idea that there are games so perfect, everyone should like them. When you ask someone what makes a game good, however, you're likely to get the same wide range of responses as you'd get in response to the bad games question. I'm sure someone out there worships EA's games as the pinnacle of their gaming experience (I'm neutral on that subject, and I intend to keep it that way).

  This, of course, doesn't stop the endless debates on whether or not a game is "good" or "bad"... but it could very well put it in perspective. (I doubt it... but a person can dream... )

  Ultimately, though, it won't matter. "Bad" games have been around since the invention of games. Even now, somewhere in the world, a development team is feverishly working on a game that will, upon release, be universally panned by the critics and gamers as "a piece of (trash) not worth the DVD it's pressed on." Several months after that, it will be put on clearance at a drastically reduced price, and some unwitting customer will look at the shiny box... see a name much cooler than the game itself deserves... and snatch it up.

  Will they "enjoy" it? Who can say...?

  • Posted Feb 13, 2009 6:30 am PT
  • Category: Editorial
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• 3Feb 09

  It Shoots Laser Beams (New Mouse)

  Over the weekend, the mouse on the main PC died.

  No warning... no provocation... not even a satisfying puff of smoke.

  It just went dark. And stayed that way.

  It was a Microsoft optical trackball. We'd had it for 7 years. There was much sorrow.

  So, basically, I spent much of the weekend looking for a replacement. Keeping the spare hooked up wasn't a real option (it's an old mechanical ball mouse) and they don't make the mouse we had anymore (or, at least, I couldn't find one).

  I had some things to consider when shopping for the replacement:

  1. It had to be wireless. We have would could (diplomatically) be called a "rat's nest" of wires behind the PC, and re-adding to that mess didn't sit well with the house's PC technician (namely, me).

  2. It had to be at least an optical mouse. I used an optical one for my laptop when gaming, and it worked well with some tweaking.

  3. It had to be "ambidextrous." The trackball was great for all the people in the house when we got it. Since then, we've had two kids... and one of them is a lefty.

  4. It had to be "cheap." As in, no more than $30. I would be upset if someone killed a mouse more expensive than that (as much as it tempted me to find an "uber-l33t" mouse ).

  After checking around, I got:

  

  Logitech LX8: Wireless, laser pointer, 8 month (estimated) battery life.

  Price: $33 at WalMart.

  It's taking some serious adjustment. After 2 days, I'm still messing around with the mouse settings: I can't seem to slow it down enough. What's worse, I have to readjust every time I load a new game (Doom 3, for example: I had the sensitivity up so high, I moved my hand a 1/4-inch or so, and did 2 complete 360's ).

  That's the only negative, though. The positives (no extra wires, easy-to-grip design, and "lefty"-friendliness) are to great.

  It's so good, I went out and got a second one for my laptop. That eliminated the wired optical mouse I had hooked up to it.

  People told me Logitech made good mice. Now, I believe them.

  And now... a moment of silence for my old mouse. It served me well for a long time. We fought many good battles together. Requiescat in pace (I probably spelled that wrong ).

  • Posted Feb 3, 2009 10:51 pm PT
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• 24Jan 09

  Musically Inclined: Machine Head Plus

  Machine Head are another Bay Area metal band (from the same area as Metallica, Megadeth, Slayer, Testament, etc.). What sets them apart is their sound: more groove metal (ala Pantera) than thrash... which is actually where they came from.

  

  Vio-lence- Eternal Nightmare: Robb Flynn's old band released their first album in 1988. Flynn was just a guitarist on the album (which is very hard to find), with Sean Killian on vocals.

  The playing is tight, aggressive thrash at its fastest... which is where the band had problems. Killian has a very good voice, but unfortunately he spends most of the album sounding like he's struggling to keep up. As a result, "Nightmare" sounds like a demo rather than a finished album.

  Rating: * * (mostly because the other 4 guys sound like they know what they're doing).

  After 2 more albums, Vio-lence called it quits... just after Flynn left the band to form Machine Head, really.

  Flynn assumed lead vocal and guitar duties, and recruited Adam Duce (bassist, and the only other founding member still in MH), Logan Mader (guitars), and Chris Kontos (drums) to record their first album in 1992...

  

  Burn My Eyes: From the first song's opening, you are assaulted by technically-masterful fury (if you don't believe that's possible... trust me: this is it) and smart, painfully direct lyrics (my favorite: "Let freedom ring with a shotgun blast" from the chorus of "Davidian," one of several stand-out tracks).

  Other great songs include "Old," "A Thousand Lies" (a political criticism), "Death Church," and "I'm Your God Now" (an incredibly spooky song about drug addiction).

  If anything on the album is flawed, however, it's the second-to-last track, "Real Eyes, Realize, Real Lies" Quite simply, a song with the same riff played repeatedly while news clips play in the background doesn't justify the (admittedly) clever title, and it certainly doesn't hold up against the rest of the truly outstanding album.

  Rating: * * * 1/2. An astounding debut album.

  

  The More Things Change... : It's very hard to follow up an amazing debut album. It's even harder when you follow it up while breaking in a new drummer (Dave McClain).

  "...Change..." doesn't hold up the promise of "Burn My Eyes." While there are some outsttanding songs here ("Ten Ton Hammer," "Take My Scars," and "Down to None"), the rest of the disc kind of blends together in a forgettable way. As many times as I've listened to it, I can't seem to hold anything after track 4 ("Down to None") in my mind.

  Rating: * *

  

  The Burning Red: First the drummer, then the second guitarist (Mader was replaced by Ahre Luster)... and the entire sound shifts as well.

  This is MH's "WTF?!?" moment. The first track ("Enter the Phoenix/Desire to Fire") reveals that the band had decided to go nu-metal.

  ...*is speechless*...

  Beyond "The Blood, The Sweat, The Tears" and a cover of "Message in a Bottle"...no.

  Rating: 1/2 * (If you're a fan of nu-metal, it could be higher, I guess... )

  

  Supercharger: Most likely, one of the most "cursed" albums in metal history.

  It was released a few weeks after 9/11. It's first single ("Crashing Around You") had its video pulled from MTV (it featured buildings burning and collapsing... not good). The record company (Roadrunner) pulled all promotion shortly afterward.

  The music really wasn't much better. Some of the music is passable ("Supercharger" is great for waking up... it's just about the bounciest metal song I've ever heard... take that as you will; "Bulldozer," "Blank Generation," and "Trephination" recall their earliest, most sucessful album), but most of it is mired in the same semi-nu-metal funk present on "Burning Red."

  Rating: * 1/2

  ...and, like rats deserting a sinking ship, Ahre Luster and Roadrunner abandoned MH.

  Ironically, when Flynn began shopping demos of the next album around, Roadrunner signed them up again... after realeasing "Hellalive" (the one CD I do not have).

  To shore up the line-up, Flynn called former Vio-lence guitarist Phil Demmel to join the band... making MH fully one-half ex-Vio-lence members... and you wondered why "Eternal Nightmare" came first here...

  

  Through the Ashes of Empires: (or, "How to Re-energize Your Old Fanbase").

  I rate this as Machine Head's best album to-date. It's aggressive, varied, and polished without losing its "organic" edge.

  "Imperium" kicks it off with power and precision in equal measure: multiple time changes and nods to thrash and doom metal give an exciting taste of what's to come...

  (Just as an aside: If you can find this to listen to {I won't link it: ToS... }, maybe you can back me up. Doesn't the chorus, which starts with "Hear me now...", resemble "Jingle Bells" in its cadence?)

  "Bite the Bullet," "Left Unfinished" (about being abandoned and adopted), "Elegy", and "In the Presence of My Enemies" are slower, more introspective tracks, yet no less powerful. Even the demi-nu-metal "Wipe the Tears" doesn't bring the album down at all.

  It all climaxes with the powerful and haunting "Descend the Shades Of Night," my favorite track on the disc.

  Rating: * * * *

  

  The Blackening: What I'm about to say will shock those of you who like this disc... but here goes...

  After "Empires," I thought "The Blackening" was a let-down.

  I'll let that stew for a bit...

  It's not a bad album by any means. "Clenching the Fists of Dissent," "Now I Lay Thee Down," and "A Farewell to Arms" are excellent songs, and "Halo," "Wolves" and "Aesthetics of Hate" are very good too.

  The problem lies in the length of the songs... holy ****!!! I can see 1 or 2 epic-length songs... but four?!? It's almost too much of a good thing.

  Rating: * * * 1/2

  Next up... I totally destroy my "metal cred"... :0

  • Posted Jan 24, 2009 11:28 pm PT
  • Category: Music
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• 21Jan 09

  Ay-yi-yi... Too Much At Once!!!

  OK... the breakdown:

  Music: We got our son a new mp3 player for Christmas. That simple act seemingly snowballed into a major changing of the guard in the house.

  Wal-Mart had 4GB Creative Zen Mosaic players on sale pre-Christmas, so we decided it was time to replace the battered, second-hand iPod he had been using. Although he liked the iPod, he fell instantly in love with the Mosaic (it looks better, is easy to use, and easier to sync music to).

  The sale price continued after Christmas for a time, and my wife kept hinting that she liked the Mosaic (not "I want one... please get me one," but "You know, they still have a few of them over there..." and "That's a pretty neat little player he got..." and "Wow... it can do that?!?"... ). Naturally, I picked one up for her shortly after Christmas (I'm starting to pick up a smattering of "female-speak"... ...no offense intended, of course... ).

  With 2 new ones in the house, and my Sansa getting a bit unstable (I don't know why, but to get new music on my player, I had to format it: none of the media players on my PCs could "see" the contents after a few syncs, so I had to start completely from scratch each time)), I decided it was time to replace mine. I had two problems with the Mosaic everyone else had, however:

  1. Wal-Mart was out of the model. All they had left were 2GB models at a slightly higher price.

  2. I didn't like the way they sounded. It's hard to describe, but no matter how much I fiddled with the equalizer, the music sounded "wrong." (It's the major reason people hate having me in their car: I will spend almost the entire trip messing around with the bass and treble settings to get the music "right"... Lord help you if you have an EQ on the car stereo... ).

  After looking around, and listening to mp3 players that were set up in the stores (with headphones I carried in my coat pocket... guess I'm lucky store security didn't raise any red flags), I picked up an 8GB Sony Walkman...

  

  It's small, thin, light, and it sounds amazing.It's missing the voice/radio-recording and microSD expansion port of my Sansa, but they're very small sacrifices.

  The Machine Head blog is in progress, by the way. I want to give "The Burning Red" and "Supercharger" one last fair hearing before I proceed. I should have it by the weekend.

  Games: I'm currently enjoying a really really bad game.

  "Space Siege," to put it bluntly, is TERRIBLE. The controls are broken, several features are poorly implemented and the character customization is extremely shallow. I'm of the opinion that the GS review was a bit too lenient.

  However...

  Have you ever seen "Plan 9 from Outer Space?" Or "Killer Klowns from Outer Space?" Both of them are low-budget Z-grade movies with more flaws than a New York state budget: bad acting, poor writing, horrible special effects.

  Both of them are also personal favorites.

  That seems to be what's happening with "Space Siege." I look forward to playing for a half-hour or so, so I can laugh at the next awkward design decision that gets me killed gruesomely.

  I think there may be a Soapbox in there somewhere... stay tuned.

  Guild Wars: Over the Christmas season, some of the officers in my guild conspired against me... they plotted behind my back... they schemed, they e-mailed... then they did something unfathomable:

  They promoted me to an officer position.

  I didn't ask for it, and I didn't look for it. These are a group of guys who've been playing for years, and have a lot more experience than I do. I asked why I was promoted, and they said it was my attitude during our get-togethers: point-blank, I'm the guy who refuses to give up, and I'm always there to assist when asked.

  Ah, well... it must be just me: I never see myself as a leader, or in a leadership position. Maybe I'm a bit too humble...

  Writing: This is a true logjam here. I have several editorial ideas (like the "I like a bad game" one), a few short stories, and a lot of band reviews swirling around like an extreme tornado of mental energy tearing through my head. I can't sift through them and choose where to go next.

  If I fall quiet again soon, it's because I can't choose what to write about next.

  So... Machine Head, this weekend. I said I'd do it.

  Maybe with one idea off my brain, the others will sort themselves.

  Until then... enjoy the rest of your week.

  • Posted Jan 21, 2009 6:19 am PT
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• 10Jan 09

  Musically Inclined: ANTHRAX!!! ANTHRAX!!! (pt. 2)

  In 1993, Anthrax had just wrapped up a ground-breaking tour with Public Enemy (yes, a rap group!), and signed a major record deal with Elektra Records (home of Metallica and Pantera). It seemed like they were headed for major sucess...

  Unfortunately, it just marked a very turbulent time for the band.

  First, they voted to fire Joey Belladonna, citing "musical differences." Later albums, and their choice of a replacement, bear this out... but as a fan of Belladonna's singing style, it just seemed like a poor choice to me.

  Stepping in to replace Joey? John Bush, vocalist of Armored Saint. While his voice fit the new direction Anthrax was going in, he never severed his ties with 'Saint, preferring to split time between the bands. This shows in the reduced output of new albums over the next 11 years. At times, I was almost convinced the band had split.

  At the same time, Metallica's "Black Album" was released. It marked a softer, wimpier sound specifically designed to garner Grammy nominations and accolades. It also (in my opinion) undercut the entire speed/thrash metal movement.

  Last, but probably most devastating, was the emergence of the grunge movement. Big sales went to bands such as Pearl Jam, Alice in Chains, and Nirvana. I'm going to refrain from voicing my opinions on that ****.

  So, how does the post-Belladonna era stack up?

  

  Sound of White Noise: Right from the start, "Sound" shows that it's a much angrier album than "Persistence," which validates their decision to hire on John Bush as singer. "Potter's Field" builds from a slow, ominous beat among static to sonic assault at the choruses. "Only" slows things down while maintaining the angry energy of the overall album, a trend which continues with "Room for One More" and "Packaged Rebellion." "Hy Pro Glo" (my favorite song on the disc) shows the band's new tightness, stopping and restarting on cue, with a slow doom-metal-type beat.

  "Invisible" heads back to the thrash roots of the band, while "1000 Points of Hate" shows their new hip-hop influences with random scratches thrown in. "Black Lodge" signs in as Anthrax's first "ballad"(excluding "Killer B's" "NFB," which was really more of a joke), delivering a gloomy song that almost doesn't fit the rest of the album. "(Sodium Pentathol)" (please don't ask me to type the true name of the song... it's the chemical formula for sodium pentathol, and I have no idea how to subscript the numbers ) steps the tempo back up to angry levels, and "Burst" completes the charge towards the end... "This Is Not An Exit," doom metal beat, punctuated with bursts of speed, coming to a scorching conclusion... and a random bit at the end ("Be dangerous, and unpredictable... and make a lot of noise") promising greater changes in store.

  Once you adjust to Bush's raspier, lower-octave delivery, "White Noise" is a satisfying album that seems to mark greater things ahead.

  Rating: * * * ½

  

  Stomp 442: The departure of Dan Spitz at lead guitar prior to the recording of this album does not bode well for the musical direction Anthrax was taking, and the cover just... baffles me. I shrank it down to make it a bit more difficult to see the guy in the thong at the right of the image... . Though the cover itself isn't as bad as "Fistful" (last time I bash it... I swear), it still delivers a heavy dose of "WTF!!?"

  The music itself doesn't help.

  Sure, there are stand-out tracks here ("Random Acts of Senseless Violence" and the haunting ballad "Bare"), but as much as I've tried (and tried... and tried...) to listen to it, it never leaves much of an impression. The lack of lead guitar tracks and solos (Charlie Benante does some solos, and the first collaboration of Dimebag Darryl of Pantera with the band shows up on "King Size") doesn't help much.

  Overall, "Stomp" was a big disappointment... which is probably why Elektra decided not to renew their contract, setting up the second of two time-bombs on this disc for the band's later efforts.

  Rating: * *

  

  Volume 8: The Threat is Real: This is an important album for several reasons... the least of which is the music.

  "Volume 8" was a very experimental album. Thrash ("Crush," "P&V" and "Born Again Idiot") coexist with punk ("Cupajoe") and country(!) ("Toast to the Extras") in a jumbled morass of very good-to-excellent tracks mixed with... not-so-good tacks. There's no cohesiveness: one minute, you're listening to cIassic Anthrax, and the next... you're baffled by something from left field.

  It reflects the band's position financially. To release it, they signed a deal with Ignition Records, a start-up label that bankrupted itself on "Volume 8" and stalled the band's efforts to make another album for years. Only 13,000 copies were pressed (according to a source that I can't find anymore), so finding it anywhere was impossible until a re-release in 2003 (or, if you got really, really, really lucky, you could find a copy in a backwater used CD store, new and unopened... *whistles innocently*).

  Is it worth buying? Sure. Will you like everything on it? Probably not.

  Rating: * * ½

  At this point, it took 5 years for Anthrax to re-unite for a new album.

  First was the financial problem: Ignition left them with a lot of legal headaches to iron out before they could even step into a recording studio. Fortunately, they were able to sign on with Sanctuary Records in 2002; this gave them the money necessary to regain control of the band from the liquidation lawyers.

  Then there was 9/11. There was some concern in certain quarters that the band's name would evoke fear, especially after real anthrax mailings were perpetrated. After some deliberation (and a hilarious appearance on David Letterman's show with a "Top 10" list of possible new names... I was leaning towards "The Face of Erectile Dysfunction" ), the band decided to throw it back in the terrorist's faces and keep the name:

  

  So, in 2003, Anthrax finally returned...

  

  We've Come For You All: The album that made me remember why I ******* LOVE Anthrax all over again.

  Harkening back to "Sound of White Noise," "WCFYA" marks the addition of Rob Caggiano as lead guitar (the first new member since Bush in '93) and a return to the focused musicianship missing since "White Noise."

  "Contact/What Doen't Die" opens the album: a martial beat, some guitars, then BANG!!! Benante's feet are working overtime, the guitars are tight, the vocals strong... and that's just the beginning.

  "Superhero" slows things down, but still maintains an edge. "Refuse to Be Denied" throws the 9/11 attacks back in the terrorist's faces with anger, humor, and a shuffle beat(!). "Safe Home" is a love ballad... I'll just stop right there... though it's a good song despite that.

  "Nobody Knows Anything" charges back into the fray with speed and a really impressive drum riff. "Strap It On," a song about the trend of wearing jean jackets with band patches sewn on every available surface (get your mind out of the gutter!), slows things down again. "Black Dahlia" speeds things up. "Cadillac Rock Box" marks the first of two collaborations on the album: Dimebag plays leads. The other, "Taking The Music Back," features Roger Daltrey (of The Who(!)), on backing vocals.

  "Think About An End" seems to foreshadow events that mark the end of the John Bush era... more in a moment. Finally, "W.C.F.Y.A." closes the album with a strong combination of the new Anthrax sound and the old.

  Rating: * * * *

  

  Music of Mass Destruction: Yes, it's a live album. No, I'm not going to reiterate my stand on live albums.

  However, this one is a very good value for the money. Not only do you get a CD, you get the live DVD in the same package, complete with outtakes of the band, two bonus tracks filmed live... and instructions on how/where to show the "devil horns." m/

  Rating: * * * ½

  

  The Greater of Two Evils: The last album featuring John Bush is a re-recording of songs picked by the fans as "the best," and has some very excellent songs from every album up to "Persistence of Time." Raw, with just enough engineering to make it listenable, "Greater" comes across as a labor of love for the fans, and love for the earliest days of the band.

  Oh... and there's a direct mention of my hometown in the liner notes (I didn't know I lived in a "megalopolis"... )

  Rating: * * * *

  Unfortunately, I don't have the "Alive 2" album that Anthrax recorded during the Belladonna/Spitz reunion tour.

  "Wait... reuinion tour?!?"

  On December 11th, 2004, a crazed fan shot and killed "Dimebag" Darryl Abbott on stage while he played with his new band, DamagePlan. A long-time friend of Scott Ian and Charlie Benante, Dimebag had collaborated on at least 3 songs with Anthrax. His death hit Ian especially hard, and he decided it was time to reunite the original, "cIassic" line-up of Anthrax for a quick tour.

  This move prompted John Bush to quit the band permanently. Considering that his ties to Armored Saint may have contributed to the scarcity of material from Anthrax since his joining the band... good riddance.

  A new album should be forthcoming this year, featuring their new lead singer Dan Nelson (I have no idea how this guy sounds... I've never heard of him). Stay tuned...

  Associated Bands of Note:

  Nuclear Assault: Formed by founding bassist Dan Lilker, Nuclear Assault are a raw, hardcore/metal fusion band. Some albums to consider getting are "Game Over/The Plague" (* * *), "Survive" (* * *), and (if you can find it, since it's out of print) "Handle With Care" (* * * ½).

  Stormtroopers of Death (SOD): Formed as a side project with Dan Lilker, Scott Ian, Charlie Benante, and Anthrax roadie Billy Milano on vocals, S.O.D. took on a life of it's own. The original "Speak English or Die" (* * * *), in particular, has had huge underground success ("March of the SOD" has even been covered by Life of Agony) and represents a darkly-humorous take on life (even though many id--- er, people, have misinterpreted several of the songs as racist, insensitive, and bad... it's ajoke!!!). The follow-up, "Bigger Than The Devil" (* * *), falls a bit short, mainly because it takes its humor a bit too seriously, and it feels forced in spots (though it does sport the shortest song I know: "Dog on the Tracks" is ½-second long... ).

  Method of Destruction (M.O.D): After the first S.O.D. project broke up, Milano formed his own version, with somewhat mixed results... and a lot of notoriety.

  Short version: He's a bit loopy.

  "M.O.D. for U.S.A." (* *) is abrasive and just a shade racist-sounding (though if you read between the lines, it's not racist at all). "Surfin' MOD" (* * *) is a vulgar and darkly hilarious take on surfing movies... but too short. "Gross Misconduct" (* * * ½) finally gets it right, in Milano's own way.

  Next up... Let freedom ring with a shotgun blast...

  • Posted Jan 10, 2009 2:50 pm PT
  • Category: Music
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• 23Dec 08

  Have a Merry/Happy Holiday of Your Choice!!!

  In chronological order, have a:

  Happy Hanukkah (I probably spelled that wrong... but it's in spell-check, so I'm happy), at least until next Sunday;

  Merry Christmas until January 5th;

  Happy/Merry Kwanzaa (I have no idea when it starts, and no idea when it ends... in fact, I have no idea what it is... and I probably spelled that one wrong, too... but I don't have to to wish you a happy/merry one, do I? );

  ...and, if I don't see or hear from any of you all, have a wonderful New Year as well.

  Peace.

  • Posted Dec 23, 2008 8:28 pm PT
  • Category: General
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• 20Dec 08

  Musically Inclined: ANTHRAX!!! ANTHRAX!!! (pt. 1)

  When people talk about the "Four Horsemen of '80s Thrash Metal," they tend to overlook one band.

  It's pretty easy to do: after all, they're the only 5-man outfit on that list; they're the only one not from the Bay Area (San Francisco, CA) metal scene; they have the only non-screaming/growling lead singer; most of all, they're the only one that didn't fued with the other three.

  I'm talking about Anthrax, my all-time favorite speed/thrash band. Based in New York City, Anthrax really set themselves apart by being fun while still being hard. Lyrically, they came across as much more intelligent than the average band; I still quote "Caught in a Mosh" in arguments ("Think before you speak, or suffer for your words" used to be my forum signature ).

  That... and in their early years, they played shows in their shorts.

  Opening lineup: Neil Turbin (vocals); Scott Ian (rhythm guitar); Dan Spitz (lead guitar); Dan Lilker (bass); Charlie Benante (drums)

  

  Fistful of Metal: Despite having the ugliest album cover in music history (I always wondered what the artist, or even the band, was thinking with this cover... I avoided buying it for years simply because of the artwork ), the songs themselves are pretty solid (if unspectacular). "Panic" and "Metal-Thrashing Mad" shine, while a cover of "I'm Eighteen" (Alice Cooper) falls flat.

  Rating: * * (-1/2 * for the cover... okay, I'll stop now )

  Turbulence: After "Fistful" was done, Turbin engineered the ouster of Lilker. This actually led the band to realize that it was Turbin who was the problem: he was fired shortly thereafter.

  Unfortunately for the band, Lilker was in a skateboard accident that left him unable to play on the next album. Frank Bello, who was Benante's nephew, replaced Lilker permanently.

  Replacing Turbin, however, was one of the best moves the band was forced to make. They hired Joey Belladonna, who was not a typical metal singer (with influences like Asia(!) and a resume that includes a runner-up position for the lead singer of Journey(!!!)... yes, he was only beaten out by Steve Perry), but was a crucial piece in the best-known line-up.

  

  Spreading the Disease: Right from the start, you are assaulted by the hyper-sonic "A.I.R," with stacatto opening and chorus riffs only slowing down long enough to sing the verses. "Lone Justice" (an homage to Clint Eastwood's "Man with No Name" movies) slows the pace a bit, before picking it back up with "Madhouse" (featured in "GTA: Vice City" and GH II). "Stand or Fall" opens with a dreamy instrumental, but quickly jumps into a another fast-and-furious blitzkrieg. "The Enemy" (a condemnation of WWII Germany) marks the half-way point with a slow but powerful ballad.

  "Aftershock" jumps straiht back to the supersonic tempo of "A.I.R", which then slows with the anti-drug "Armed and Dangerous." "Medusa" is really the only disappointing song on the album (not only does it's theme jar with the rest of the album, but the vocals are rather... girly compared to the other songs). It all wraps up with a "BANG!!!" in the form of "Gung Ho"... if you thought the rest of the songs were fast...

  Rating: * * *

  

  Among the Living: The third album is where I got my start with the band... and it's a great place to start. The title track (inspired by Stephen King's "The Stand"... the first of 2 King-inspired songs on the album) opens with power and fury, and doesn't let up through "Caught in a Mosh" (their signature track: called one of the "Top 100 Metal Songs of All Time" on VH1, and featured on "GH Rocks the 80s") and "I Am The Law" (based on Judge Dredd) before slowing down for "Efilnikufesin (N.F.L)" (there's an actual phrase in there... if I clue you in to it, though, I might get in trouble... ). The second King-inspired song, "Skeletons in the Closet" (based on the novella "Apt Pupil" in "Different Seasons"), brings you back to the rapid-fire metal at the half-way.

  "Indians" (about the plight of Native Americans) stands out as the off-beat track of the album, in a good way: it uses Native American-sounding drums in the opening, and has some of the most heart-felt lyrics on any track (Belladonna is part- Native American). Unfortunately, then next two tracks ("One World" and "ADI/Horror Of It All") seem to suffer a lyrical hangover in comparison. However, "Imitation of Life" redeems the second half with an all-out assault on "fake" people in the entertainment industry.

  Rating: * * * ½

  

  I'm The Man: Ever wonder who invented "rap-metal" or "nu-metal?" Look no further.

  In their defense, "I'm the Man" was written as a farce: nothing in the song even hints that the band was anywhere near taking themselves seriously when they sang it.

  The EP itself consists of 3 versions of the song (a radio edit, the uncut version, and a live version that's mostly Scott Ian ensuring the death of live radio), a smoking cover of "Sabbath, Bloody Sabbath," and live versions of "Caught in a Mosh" and "I Am The Law."

  Rating: * * (unless you like nu-metal, or can see the humor in "I'm The Man"... then it's * * ½)

  

  State of Euphoria: So how do you top "Among the Living?" Do you even try?

  "State" is a departure from the first 3 albums: the artwork is much more light-hearted (the interior of the album contains a caricature of the band done by Mad magazine artist Mort Drucker), the songs more positive... and consequently, the album suffered critically and among the fans.

  I liked it, though.

  "Be All, End All" (about doing it your way) opens with a cello... slow, spooky cello. It turns into a powerful metal celebration of individuality. "Out of Sight, Out of Mind" tears apart the then-fledgling practice of sampling in rap songs with humor and heavy riffs; "Make Me Laugh" does the same to televangelists. "Antisocial" (a cover of a song by French punk band Trust, and the only recognizable single from the album) drags the first half down, in my opinion, as it really doesn't highlight the band's real strengths.

  "Who Cares Wins" is my "stand-out" pick on "State:" powerful lyrics (about the plight of the homeless), musically tight, and with a conscience rarely seen in a metal band.

  "Now It's Dark" always confused me: what is this song about?!? The drum fills are incredible, but I always got a sense of "what were they thinking?" from a listen. "Misery Loves Company" (another King-inspired song, based on "Misery") seems too light-hearted for the subject matter, and "13" just... I don't know... it's another "wtf?!?!?" moment. "Finale" closes the album strong, though: a tongue-in-cheek poke at commitment, with scorching riffs and and insanely-fast drums.

  Rating: * * ½ (although I always considered it * * *, just because it's insanely fun to listen to)

  

  Persistence of Time: In a word... WOW. Much of the album revolves around the themes of death and racism, in one of the most mature offerings of the Belladonna era.

  "Time" opens with a ticking clock... and through tight riffs and machine-gun drums, changing rapidly from fast to slow, you are brought to the realization that this is not going to be a humorous ride like "State."

  "Blood," "Keep It In the Family," "H8Red," "Intro to Reality/Belly of the Beast," and "One Man Stands" decry racism in the most uncompromising terms possible, with music that backs the anger at the toxicity of hate. "Got the Time" (a cover of a Joe Jackson(!) song) highlights the frantic pace of modern liife with frantic pacing and guitars, and harried-sounding singing. "Gridlock,""In My World," and "Discharge" fly straight in the teeth of death and refuse to compromise.

  The word "masterpiece" springs straight to mind when I think of "Persistence." It's truly the highlight of Anthrax's career to that point.

  Rating: * * * *.

  

  Attack of the Killer B's: *sigh* I can't express how disappointing this album is... not just because it's the last appearence by Joey Belladonna with the band for 15 years.

  B-sides... forgotten tracks that got left off of albums, only to appear as the backing tracks on old-school vinyl singles. Also, a marketing gimmick in the making, since they so often got collected on one disk.

  There's usually a good reason that the songs didn't make the album, though: they are generally not as good as the stuff that did make the record.

  There are some redeeming songs on this collection: "Milk" and "Chromatic Death" (covers of songs by side project Stormtroopers of Death); "Startin' Up a Posse" (a very profane anti-censorship song, with a country(!!!) flavor); "Bring the Noise" (a team-up with rap(!?!!) group Public Enemy, who they toured with... and who I saw them in concert with); a cover of surf-rock cIassic "Pipeline;" finally, the song that ruined "City of Angels" for me for life: "Dallabnikufesin (NFB)," an over-the-top parody of a typical sappy radio ballad.

  Rating: * *

  (Next up: Post-Belladonna... enter John Bush of Armored Saint)

  • Posted Dec 20, 2008 11:37 pm PT
  • Category: Music
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• 13Dec 08

  Live from the Ninth Circle of Hell

  Over the past two days, my section of New York has been buried in up to an inch (about 3 cm, if my conversion is accurate) of ice.

  It may not seem like much... until you pile it on a tree branch, or a power line.

  

  Huge sections of the area are without power (we just got ours back last night... more later on that). The utility companies are predicting that some spots could be out for another three days, even though they have crews from as far away as Michigan working on the problem.

  It's a bigger problem than a few downed lines, however: a few power transfer stations blew out, making for some pretty spectacular fireworks... and making the power companies' jobs just that much harder.

  

  It all started Thursday afternoon. Sleet is common in the area, but the front remained locked longer than usual, and it just... kept... sleeting. It was pretty at first (the trees looked like they were coated in glass), but very dangerous to drive in. I went out to pick up some essentials for the weekend; in the 5 minutes it took to drive to the store I was riding completely blind because my windshield wipers couldn't clear the ice fast enough.

  At 1AM, our house (and all the ones around us) lost power. It flickered a couple of times (giving me hope that it would stay on), and then just died. In the summer, it wouldn't have been a problem. In December, when the temperature drops below 32° F (0° C)... and your furnace relies on electricity... there's problems.

  My wife got us all up on Friday morning and took us to her parents house. Miraculously, they had electricity, and heat...

  ...at least, until about 12PM, when a substation nearby blew out, and took out power there, too. Because there were more people there, we were able to keep the temperature up a bit longer (just enough to be safe, without being really comfortable).

  The coffee ran out about 2PM. That's when I started feeling like the walking dead.

  On the plus side, we had candles. I was able to finish reading a book I've been trying to read for the past couple of weeks. On the minus side, the book ("Battle for the Abyss" from the WH40K Horus Heresy series) was pretty terrible (if I saw the words "sanguine" and "gore," or any combination thereof, one more time, I was going to set the book on fire... that might have been the lack of caffiene talking, but not by much).

  The worst part was the lack of information. Without TV, radio (most of the stations were off-line; those that were on weren't talking about the storm or the power), or internet, we had no idea about how wide-spread the damage was, or how fast the power crews were restoring electricity.

  This morning, after waking up much earlier than anticipated (having your entire family crammed in one large bed is a great way to share heat, and makes for a great bonding experience; it's not really conducive to a good night's sleep, though... especially when 3 out of the 5 people in bed are active sleepers, yourself included ), we called our house, on the theory that if power was restored, the answering machine would pick up.

  It did.

  We figured, from the clocks that don't have battery back-up, that we were restored at about 2AM Saturday morning (total outage: 13 hours). Our cat greeted us at the door, so we knew she was okay (and very happy to see us). I'm not sure about the hermit crabs (they're tropical pets, so the drop in temperature may have killed them; it's also possible that they went into suspended animation); I'm keeping my fingers crossed that there are no long-term problems there.

  At the moment, we're prepping to have her family come here and stay for the night if the power isn't restored by this afternoon. With her aunt, her brother and his two kids here, things may get crowded, but it's the least we can do to make sure no one gets sick from the lack of heat (it's expected to drop well below freezing tonight).

  Well... back to the grind. There's a lot to do, and not much time to do it in. Until then, stay warm.

  • Posted Dec 13, 2008 7:28 am PT
  • Category: Science
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