There's no method to the madness.

• 19Dec 09

  Have blogs on GameSpot taken away from the discussion on GGD?

  I was thinking about how there are relatively few regulars that post new topics to GGD, they either link to news or just respond to what topics other users bring up, and I wonder if the reason is due to journals being a feature on GameSpot. I mean, if I recall, a lot of what used to be posted on GGD was fairly personal in nature; one person would be playing through a game that was a couple years old, and they'd relate their experiences in a GGD post. Now, that sort of thing usually ends up with a blog post. I do having a blog, but I wonder if we're making a mistake by putting our game-related experiences on our blogs instead of the game boards.
  
  I'm starting to think I should reserve my blog for rants, and post anything game-related thoughts to GGD.

  • Posted Dec 19, 2009 1:25 pm PT
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• 14Dec 09

  The Bs: Batman and Beatles.

  I picked up these two games at once, and I must say that they're both highly impressive in their own ways.
  
  The situtation is this with Rock Band; I bought the original when the PS2 version was on sale, but later when I bought the PS3, I found out the instruments, but not the game were compatible, so I have not delved too deeply into the formula. Granted, I have played Guitar Hero I and II fairly extensively, but what's nice about this one is that I really like the whole track list. The Beatles strayed into a wide variety of musical territory, but what they had, beside their basic musical genuity, was accessibility. It's hard not to like them whether the song is blues, do-wop pop, a pre-cursor to hard rock or psychedelic rock. I'm also starting to make the transition from normal to hard on guitar... a perilous transition, due to the sheer mind-twisting power of relocating your hand on the frets, but I think the reported reduced difficulty of this one has helped. If I can master hard on Beatles, I can probably survive it on other ones. Singing is fun, though it's hard to find the middle ground between the way I want to sing, and the way the game wants me to sing it.
  
  Batman is an intelligent simulation of being in Batman's shoes. It casually integrates stealth, brawling, puzzle-solving, exploration and the moody atmosphere in the series so naturally that it's hard to believe it's taken this long to bring a truly excellent Batman game out. I remember being indifferent to the first trailer, which to my eye, made it look like a standard brawler with above-average visuals. The strength of the game is that it underplays the action; you will spend as much time exploring and sneaking as you will fighting hand to hand. Oh, and the writing and acting is surprisingly decent; the strength of the game is that you actually feel like you're filling Batman's shoes in their entirety. Also, the writing and acting are surprisingly decent, letting you really sink into the role. Batman himself is a little stiffly acted, but most of the time, he doesn't get in the way.
  
  As an aside, I beat the original Uncharted today. Fun game, but not special. Unsurprising coming from Naughty Dog. They are still making the same stupid mistakes with poor checkpoint design. There are definitely some frustrating sections. It's the game equivalent of a mindless, summer blockbuster. But in this industry's absence of games both interactive and emotionally deep, that's about as complicated as games get I suppose. I'm a little lukewarm on jumping into Uncharted 2, simply because I do not trust Naughty Dog to do anything particularly impressive, regardless of what accolades critics and fans throw their way. They're highly derivate and usually create games with unwieldly difficulty curves and bland stories. For some odd reason, I keep buying their games; I have a Crash game, bought two Jak games and completed the third during a rental, and bought Uncharted (I think for a lack of ideas of what else to buy with my PS3). I think I'll finish up Persona 3 (I think I'm... eighty five hours in? The end is nigh for that one.), and maybe Devil Survivor, then go after a few other RPGs. The sooner I beat some of my role-playing games, the sooner I can justify Dragon Age.

  • Posted Dec 14, 2009 4:54 pm PT
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• 15Oct 09

  Hey, that videogame stole my name!

  http://www.gamespot.com/xbox360/puzzle/lucidity/review.html
  
  Who knew that Lucidity would be someone that another human being would think of as a good title for a videogame?
  
  I don't suppose this really affects me, but it was certainly jarring to see a 5.5, of all possible scores, next to the title of my pet concept.

  • Posted Oct 15, 2009 9:29 am PT
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• 11Oct 09

  If you want to spend time on an enjoyable hobby like videogames...

  Do not take seven courses in one semester.

  I'm having fun, but... I want my role-playing game time back.

  • Posted Oct 11, 2009 3:30 pm PT
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• 6Aug 09

  Thoughts on various RPGs, and why I can't seem to agree with Kevin Van'Ord.

  I'm relatively new to this idea of being a music student, and relatively new to the idea of being a music enthusiast (I know how to keep tabs on what's happening in the game industry, but no such skills for the music industry), but even so, I've identified Frederic Chopin as my favorite classical composer. I think that too many other composers are susceptible to creating what is ultimately "just another piece", but I have yet to find a Chopin piece I do not find unique, engaging, and heart-rending. Melodically, chordally, he's someone I'd like to emulate, although my own playing has a long, long way to go before I can even attempt some of his more difficult compositions, let alone try to create anything to rival them.
  
  That, and with my known predisposition for Japanese role-playing games, you'd think I'd be all over Eternal Sonata. But I'm not.
  
  Despite its unique premise, despite a combat system that does have some innovations, despite an attractive visual presentation, I just don't think it works particularly well. Many of its flaws are the sort that can be pointed to in Persona 3, a game I'm head-over-heels for, but the difference is that things like merely adequate writing, inconsistent voice acting, and overly stiff animation are the rough around the diamond. I'm not so convinced that there's much of a diamond at the bottom of Eternal Sonata.
  
  There's no suggested subtext to characters; I don't think Beat is anything more than your typical, plucky sidekick, or Allegretto anything but your "let's do what we have to for good!" protagonist, or Polka anything but your symbol of innocence female lead. It's a little bizarre to have Chopin in there too, as one of your party characters, but once you get over the sheer unreality of it, he doesn't seem to possess anything but the generic torment that RPG characters seem prone to.
  
  It'd be a little bit easier to stick out with the story if I was more sold on the gameplay. I will say I'm sold on the combat, but not the combat system. It's an engaging enough set-up, as it has some nice tactical implications for where it will go, but I don't know if it's deep enough to sustain a thirty hour game by itself. Usually, that's made up for in RPGs, is customization outside the combat itself which allows for character development that keeps the combat compelling. It works for Persona 3, making what might have grown tiresome after thirty hours fun well into the eightieth, but there doesn't seem to be the same infrastructure in Eternal Sonata. Changing the light dark ability does not strike me as enough depth. If this game was hard to the point of making those choices critical, maybe, but it's been too easy on me so far.
  
  As for the much lauded visuals... they're fantastic when everything is relatively still. But it still suffers from the very common problem among JPRGs of poor, jilted animation. It's too bad, because the one thing I will not dispute is that the art direction is fantastic. But perhaps they should take my brother's advice, and study c1assical animation before they work on another RPG project; what they're doing right now isn't even close to acceptable.
  I'm not saying this game is bad, but there are so many problems, and not quite enough bright spots for me to be certain that I'll finish this. I might, simply because it has redeeming qualities and according to Van'Ord's review it won't take me that long, but I'm seriously contemplating giving up on it before it ends.
  
  I guess part of my problem is... that right now, if I was given the choice, I would flip scores between Eternal Sonata and Blue Dragon.
  
  Blue Dragon is so far and away the better game, I don't even think they're in the same league. Now, they have many of the same problems. The writing, acting, storytelling, characterizations and animations are all similiarly suspect, but Blue Dragon has one critical element that Eternal Sonata does not: depth.
  The c1ass system in Blue Dragon gives you room to play in a way that Eternal Sonata does not, and the combat system is tough enough on you to make you pay if you do not get more out of it. Playing Blue Dragon is rather... liberating, because it is not a highly rethought JRPG system, like a Persona 3, but rather, an elegant streamlining of the Dragon Quest archetype. You fight, you have healing spells, you have offensive spells, and then there are all the other abilities around them. The acquisition of those spells and abilities, the re-arraning of properties, has been done many a time before, but Blue Dragon has a way of letting you at that essence quickly, showing you what the effect of a sty1e change will be with no confusion, or showing you what one ability will provide over another, or just giving you a tough decision because equipping one item will boost different statistic than another, instead of one being flat-out better. It's a smart system.
  
  Part of the reason I like it, though, is that it gives me something else besides a combat system to admire. I know scomer, probably the only major defender of Blue Dragon (who has since disappeared from these parts), thought that the characters were redeemably charming, and worth cheering for. I don't. I've sat through a few JRPGs where quality characters made up for some weaknesses elsewhere in the plot (Tales of Symphonia jumps to mind, though its had other qualities), and Blue Dragon is not one of them. Boring characters and a plot that goes nowhere. But! It is very pretty.
  
  I just like the look of Blue Dragon; it feels like a chest of toys come to life. The monster designs are consistently fun to look at, and while the animation is still weak, it does not noticeably detract the way Eternal Sonata's does. I can understand many of Van'Ord's criticisms, but his dismissal of Blue Dragon's visuals as "bland", I find particularly puzzling. Maybe he played the game in a parallel universe where the charming, full-of-life character designs are considered a flaw, rather than a strength. Too much use of depth of field? Sure, but that doesn't change the fact that the game is highly easy on the eyes. Moreso than most 360 games, in my opinion.
  
  So I don't know where he's coming from on these two; neither has a particularly engaging story, but Blue Dragon is, at least, highly playable and deep, whereas Eternal Sonata just seems to be another face in the crowd.
  
  I am grateful to the man, though, because even if we can't agree on those two games, he pointed me towards a game that I've enjoyed more than any RPG since Final Fantasy X, and that is Persona 3.
  
  I've talked about the game before in this blog, but I don't think I've stressed enough how unusual it is for me to have played eighty hours of the game. I've got a lot of games in this house, and a good number of my unfinished ones are role-playing games. Really good role-playing games. Planescape: Torment, Fallout, Neverwinter Nights, Chrono Cross, Final Fantasy XII, Mass Effect, Knights of the Old Republic and Dragon Quest V, to name some of the better ones. And despite having played all of these to varying degrees (between one and thirty hours, depending on the game), Persona 3 is consistently the game I turn to.
  
  I don't think a role-playing game has done enough to capture my attention and generate interest in a series since playing a SNES game that I then thought of as Final Fantasy III (I remember seeing a poster for Final Fantasy VII around that time, a game I would turn out to merely like, and being enthralled at the possibility of playing a game in the same series, while despairing of my chances of getting my hands on a PlayStation). As such, with the game wrapping up, I've recently bought two games in the same series. The first I bought was the DS Shin Megami Tensei game, Devil Survivor. The Shin Megami Tensei and high GameSpot review were enough to get me interested. The second was, unsurprisingly, Persona 4. A game I played briefly just because, well, it's exciting to play more Persona, but I'll likely roll right into as soon as I polish off Persona 3. Although I might start a new playthrough of Persona 3 as well. And definitely start playing The Journey. It's entirely possible that all my role-playing hours will soon be within the Shin Megami Tensei series.
  
  As for impressions of those games, I have not even fought my first battle in Persona 4, so I won't say anything except that it seems to have gotten the same stylish, but rough, presentation and translation as Persona 3. Devil Survivor seems to be a smart mix of SRPG and turn-based combat conventions, though I haven't delved into the system too much yet, but it's highly promising. Oh, and it's kind of nice to play the game on a system where the limited presentation abilities of the team are actually pretty high compared to what you expect out of a DS game.
  
  It's a strange, and wonderful world, that of role-playing games, and it's just too bad that one only has so much time for them.
  
  And if it hasn't been made clear already, I whole-heartedly recommend playing Persona 3.
  
  Note: The c1ass and sty1e errors have not been fixed yet. This goes beyond incompetence into the realm of pathetic negligence. Get it together, GameSpot. Whatever you're having your programmers work on, it should not take precedence over fixing what's broken. And this has been broken for years, now!

  • Posted Aug 6, 2009 7:17 pm PT
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• 1Aug 09

  Seventy five hours in and...

  I believe Persona 3 is starting to wrap up.
  
  Just about ready to begin a New Game +!

  • Posted Aug 1, 2009 4:49 pm PT
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• 27Jun 09

  Normally, I'm the first one to rip games for being too long....

  But forty hours in, and maybe halfway through, I'm still digging Persona 3. It's a huge gamble to design a game to be this long, because in all likelihood, most people will lose interest, but this game is good enough to keep your attention from beginning to end. In fact, I'm considering starting a New Game+ as soon as I finish.

  The only thing that makes me wonder is if at any point the pace starts picking up. I'm already on the verge of maxing out my character's social stats, and my characters are beating down shadows with relatively low opposition, but do the days start moving more quickly at some point?

  • Posted Jun 27, 2009 9:22 pm PT
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• 18Jun 09

  Persona 3: FES is brilliant.

  I have not played a JRPG this... strong in years. I don't know if it's the best RPG in my "now playing" set (Final Fantasy VI is in there as well), but it is the most absorbing. Absorbing enough to keep me playing until 5AM two nights running. Yikes.
  
  I hadn't been playing this game much, since I had bought the original version of Persona (which I've since given away to a friend), and restarted the game (with some stat bonuses) for FES. It was slow going having to go through the overly lengthy exposition again, then go through social links I had already discovered, but I turned the corner the other night and am well into new content. I met the seventh SEES member and added the fifth playable character, and I finally feel like I grasp the entire system of the game.
  
  Incredibly strong gameplay. Fighting is just difficult enough to make you work, but if you're smart, you can stay ahead of your foes. The random generated dungeons does not allow for a whole lot of unique layouts, but searching for loot and dealing with or avoiding enemies is an enticing formula, and climbing ever higher into Tartarus is tense and exciting. The characters are far more believable and likable than your average anime archetypes that plague these sorts of games; Junpei is a convincing loser, Yukari's mix between kindness and aloof pretension is fun to watch play out, Akihiko is a fun mix of seriousness and wry humor, and Mitsuru's coolness combined with her insistence upon personal ettiquitte is intriguing. These people seem like, well, people. And the presentation is stylish (and even seems to work the limitations of the PS2 to its advantage), with excellent character and monster designs, attractive visuals, good voice acting (some stronger than others, mind you). Oh! The side story social links are all intriguing. The plot burns slowly, but it's gradually starting to pick up, with questions about the exact nature of the dark hour, the Shadows and what, exactly, Apathy Syndrome is. But there's certainly enough side content in the game to not make you care that the story advances at its own pace. It gives room for all the small bits of character development and getting a chance to meet others.
  I've talked myself into playing this game more. Unfortunately, I've got an errand to run this afternoon, so I won't get a chance until later. But if you haven't already, give this one a shot.
  
  And personally, I can't wait to move on to Persona 4, which by all accounts, is at least at the same level as this one.

  • Posted Jun 18, 2009 11:44 am PT
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• 5Jun 09

  So E3 came...

  I'm overwhelmed. It'll likely take me all weekend to catch up. Looks like there's some good games out there... I'm just not sure if there's that one game I'm totally pumped for yet.

  • Posted Jun 5, 2009 9:53 am PT
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• 29May 09

  E3 is coming.

  I have no idea which games are going to be there, really. Just a bunch of names of sequels to games I either played or heard of. The odd original title. But E3... that is when I can get back into the swing of things. That's when I can know what, say, Assassin's Creed 2 is going to be all about (I still should finish the original, just to see where its post-modern themes go). And maybe which of the endless hordes of sequels will actually be doing something new.
  
  I can't wait.

  • Posted May 29, 2009 9:38 pm PT
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• 21May 09

  Giancarlo Varanini? Really?

  I made a post the other day about feeling out of the loop, and looking forward to this E3 bringing me back up to speed with the happenings in the game industry, so I took a look at GameSpot's E3 editors preview to familiarize myself with what the big titles were going to be headed into the show.
  
  And then I see, among the names of Editors, Giancarlo Varanini.
  
  What? Who pressed the time warp button? Does this mean I have to go through high school all over again?
  
  For all the hyperbole that has gone on about how GameSpot's credibility is in ruins, and how the site just isn't what it used to be... here's a name from the fabled glory days of GameSpot.
  
  I signed up November 28th, 2002, and that was around the time that I started reading GameSpot regularly. Giancarlo, if I recall, left sometime around late 2003 or early 2004. He was, if I recall, the first face, the first name that I knew that was leaving. The thought was astounding.
  
  These were men that at that time, I could conceive of no better life. They were gods among men. Not because they were handsome, or rich, or famous, but because they were writers, like me, who worked on the two things that I loved most... playing games and writing. Was it hard work? Sure. But it was hard work on things that I loved. Somewhere deep down, I could not comprehend why anyone would move on from such a... a haven.
  
  Giancarlo's departure was probably not the one I regretted most as a reader. Greg Kasavin is still, in my mind, the best critic I've seen; he had an unrivaled way of dissecting a game down to its essence, and weighing its pros and cons in exactly the weight they deserved. The Jeff Gerstmann firing was dramatic, and has altered the course of the web-site dramatically. Carrie Gouscos' (apologies to Carrie, I really can't recall the spelling of your last name!) was a real blow to the features part of the website, which has been on the bland side since.
  
  But Giancarlo? I don't remember him much. He was one of the bunch; one of several men who had this mysterious ability to not just write, as I could, but write about videogames. He was the first one, the first one that was to me part of the canon, that left. He forecast, in a way, that all those faces that were seemingly immortally associated with GameSpot, would eventually depart. I, at that time, would not have been able to comprehend this website without Alex Navarro. And yet here we are.
  
  But now he's back. Am I happy? Well, I seem to remember he was good at his job, so I suppose I am. But his return emphasizes how much my outlook to GameSpot has changed. There's nothing in me that holds on to the reverence I used to have. I still have respect for the site. Kevin Van'Ord is one of the better writers I've seen writing game reviews. Names like Brian Ekberg, Andrew Park and Ricardo Torres represent a tie to the GameSpot of old. The new ones seem competent enough, and the criticism seems to be at the level that it was before. It's perhaps a bit blander, without the presence of personalities like that of Ryan Davis, Navarro or Gerstmann, but the writing is still good.
  
  But I suppose it's lost its mystique. And that's what Giancarlo goes back far enough in my reading of GameSpot to represent; the mystique that he and his co-workers represented at that time in my life. But now, I regard him not as someone who has work I could only dream of, but as a man, not unlike others, who happens to work on something of some interest to me.
  
  When Giancarlo left, he was like a god leaving Mount Olympus. Now that he's returned, he's someone who will likely do some good work for a product I use.
  
  It's probably a lot healthier; it's a lot more real.

  • Posted May 21, 2009 11:13 pm PT
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• 13Apr 09

  A reminder of why I dislike gaming on a PC.

  I've always wanted to become a little more familiar with PC gaming, because several of its key genres, RTS, MMORPG, FPS and WRPG, have always struck me as intriguing, if a little difficult for an outsider to get into. But gaming on a PC itself? Painful. I often wonder whether or not I'll be able to get a particular game to work. The keyboard and mouse is not exactly the most intuitive device ever conceived, and installation is often a pain. But today, I was reminded of the number one reason I do not like PC gaming.
  
  When your computer decides to die, it takes your games with it.
  
  My computer crashed. My hard drive is wiped. I don't know how I'm going to get it up and running again, but when I do, I'll have to re-install all of my games, and start them over from the beginning.
  
  Look, I'm sure PC gamers have figured out ways around this for years. "Oh, just back-up your games and save files" they might say, or "if you just do such and such, you'll have less issues with your computer"... well you know what? I'm currently trying not to fail college, have a social life, and spend some time with a time consuming hobby, while dealing with a learning disability that specifically has problems with self-management. Do you think that I really have the energy or the attention to try to deal with all of these problems?
  
  The sad thing is that there are too many good games on the PC for me to ignore. As much as I'd like to ignore the PC as a gaming platform, well, I don't want to stop playing games like Syberia, or Fallout, or Warcraft III. I want to enjoy my hobby, and that inevitably leads me to some PC gaming.

  But it certainly is a headache. I would not complain if all future games were on some sort of console.

  • Posted Apr 13, 2009 1:45 pm PT
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• 25Mar 09

  Running low on ideas, Nintendo?

  So if you haven't heard, there's another DS Zelda game coming out called "Spirit Tracks". It's based around transporting yourself not on a horse or boat, but rather, on a train.

  I don't see how this is supposed to set my heart aflutter.
  
  From the trailer, it looks like Phantom Hourglass; same engine, same sort of touch-screen interface, same Zelda formula... which is fine, but they're going to have to up the complexity of the puzzles significantly to get me to buy in. I haven't the slightest idea why some outlets (*coughGameSpotcough*) scored Phantom Hourglass higher than Twilight Princess, when Phantom Hourglass was a less original, more poorly designed game with a new, but ultimately less functional control system. It's not that touch screen controls didn't work; but there were some bits that would have been flat-out better using buttons on a D-pad (which is why the lack of a combo interface befuddled me).
  
  A thought occured to me; does anyone remember that April Fool's joke from a year or three back where a site "announced" a futuristic Zelda, complete with art work? It sorta feels like a very tentative step in that direction. Zelda games have always been rooted firmly in a ****c magic and medieval setting; this is really the first time that even a hint of technological advancement has appeared in a Zelda game.
  
  For all my cynicism and discontent with the sequel-driven industry we have today, Zelda really hits at my weak spot. There's something about Nintendo's school of game design that resonates with me, and the Zelda games tend to show the best that they've got. But even that's starting to wear thin. I took a look at the boss they showed, and part of me... honestly can't tell the difference between that thing and all the other "first giant thing you kill" bosses from other Zelda games. It's just lost its personality for me. Conducting a train doesn't strike me as particularly fun, either.
  
  The thing is, if Nintendo decides to shock everyone and take a major step outside the fantasy realm of Zelda into a futuristic world, whether utopian, dystopian, gritty or clean, I'll be excited beyond belief. Because I want to be excited about a series that has more than any other, with a possible exception to the Final Fantasy games, provided me with more consistent and memorable entertainment than any other. I want a reason to be, as a twenty one year old who feels like he's been there, done that with such a gigantic portion of gaming, have a reason to get excited over what will be the fourteenth installment (assuming Spirit Tracks comes out first, which I presume it will). I want a reason to believe in sequels again; to believe that just because nobody buys anything with an unfamiliar name, doesn't mean creativity has to be dead. I want to believe that Nintendo can still come up with somethign crazy,original and high quality. Because as of late, it's been either or, and that bothers me.
  
  Of course, if they went ahead and announced two major projects that are one-off, blockbuster Wii titles with no ties to existing characters or franchises full of originality and life and uniqueness, I would be happy. But that's not where the industry is right now; it exists to make sequels. And until the day comes where that changes, I'll have to find reasons to be okay with playing the thirteenth Final Fantasy and fourteenth Zelda. Where else am I going to go?

  I feel a little like Dr. Horrible; this world will be so much better if I can just rule it.

  • Posted Mar 25, 2009 11:19 pm PT
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• 23Mar 09

  I think me and the game industry just took a break.

  It's strange. I would every now and then check GameSpot to see how games scored, but unless something was particularly brilliant or unusual, I just sort of acknowledged that certain games might be worth getting around to eventually, and left it at that. I didn't really care. The industry was bothering me, and I had something new to study in music that I had much to learn about.

  But I think somewhere along the way I got too caught up in my hatred of the franchise-oriented tendencies of this business to remember; A) I've had fun with sequels, even if I can envision something better, B) there are still some creative people working their magic in spite of it all and C) I really feel I can do something to change this industry for the better.

  I want to stick my head back into what's going on with the gaming industry; see what the trends are, get back in touch with what the interesting upcoming projects are. And maybe throw an application at 2K Boston (makers of BioShock, for those wondering) just to see if I could get any sort of response.

  • Posted Mar 23, 2009 12:40 pm PT
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• 10Dec 08

  My Life Lately.

  I am still alive. It really would be nice if I could maintain a more consistent presence on these boards, but I'm still adjusting. Adjusting to a college workload. Adjusting to the fact that, for the first time in years, there are people my age worth having as friends. Adjusting to being generally happy, even if I wake up every day a little bewildered that I'm majoring in Music, and that I don't have the slightest desire to major or even minor in English.
  
  It's a sign that I've matured. I've always felt like I'm both younger and older at heart than most people my age. Older in my thoughts and what I cared about, but younger emotionally. I think that has showed over the years, as anyone who has read some of my posts from three or four years ago can attest.
  
  I'm a Music major because I am comfortable with my own incompetence. I came in with no ability to play an instrument, no formal training for singing, no background in theory (before this year, I couldn't name the notes on a treble clef)... absolutely nothing to indicate that I had "the gift".
  
  I'm still not very good. But I'm a lot further along than I was a year ago. And I'm content with that. A few years ago, the feelings of incompetence, especially when I'm surrounded by other music majors who are accomplished pianists and singers, would have overwhelmed me. I was overwhelmed only two years ago when I was majoring in writing, something I knew I could do. But I'm... just more grown up now.
  
  I'm on my own time-line when it comes to music. I want to be a terrific singer, a brilliant composer, a strong pianist, and an all-around musical person. But I don't need to be any of those things tomorrow. I'd just like to move a little closer towards that every day. And as long as I'm moving in that direction, I'm happy.
  
  What I am lacking however, is more music just for listening to. If you want to toss at me a few names of bands/musicians/composers you think are quite good, I'd be happy to have that. Something I can find on YouTube would be nice, though.
  
  ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

  I'm also a far more social person than I ever anticipated. See, I had always assumed that my introverted nature and reserved personality meant that I was not social. It turns out I'm just quietly social. I like being around people, and interjecting when I feel I can add something meaningful, but I don't perpetuate moment to moment banter much. And I'd rather listen to what other people are saying than hear myself talk.
  
  I actually have friends. My age. In Edmonton. That I can see face to face. And I have a number of acquaintances with whom I am on friendly terms with. I attend social events when I have opportunity; I look forward to seeing the people that I've come to like, getting to know someone better, or meeting someone new. Simple stuff, right? But this is quite radical for me. I suppose I simply feel confident around other people in a way that I have not before. Might have something to do with all the weight I've lost over the past several months (something in the vicinity of fifty pounds in the last six or seven months), but mostly, it's a shift in attitude. I like the people around me, and when I use my brain and avoid being a jerk (this is harder than it sounds! accidentally being a jerk comes very naturally to me!), it's possible for them to like me too.
  
  There's something of a question, I suppose, when one becomes this social, of one's love life. I will say that I think all of my confusion and frustration with life and general, once it found out that it no longer had a home in my day to day life, decided to move over to the place where my brains in the area of romance should be. I don't want to go into detail except to say that it's strange, it's confusing, and at times the life of a confirmed bachelor seems very appealing. I might tell the full story someday. But the full story hasn't been written yet. But wouldn't it be nice if love was as simple as you liking someone, them liking you back, and eventually the two of you unavoidably fall in love?

  -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

  There's one final thing of note. The game project I have mentioned several times before may finally be lifting off the ground. I was kind of hoping to hear a response to an e-mail I sent off a while back to someone I had wanted to integrate into the project, but for now, it looks like it'll be just me and Zach at the moment. He took at look at some of the "competition" on the XNA Community stuff. Not terribly brilliant. I think that we could develop a game that is light-years ahead of that stuff, and would be among the best XBLA games. We still have prove it, but other than my limited programming knowledge (which I plan to expand shortly!), I feel our abilities already surpass a lot of what's out there.

  But we need to get going! My last test for the Fall semester was today, so starting after I wake up, I'm going to be working on this project full time. I'm going to try to learn the ins and outs of C# and XNA as quickly as possible, and hopefully, we can get an early prototype up and running sometime in the early part of the new year. Stay tuned... the more this project gets going, the more we're going to want to talk it up.

  • Posted Dec 10, 2008 11:57 pm PT
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• 1Nov 08

  I wrote some words today.

  National Novel Writing Month began, and for me, it began well. I broke twenty thousand words today. This happened before two o'clock in the afternoon.
  
  What frightens me is that if I had really pushed myself, twenty five thousand words might have been possible today, and theoretically, tomorrow as well. It might be physically possible for me to complete a novel in a weekend.
  
  I think I'm going to curl up and fall asleep now.

  • Posted Nov 1, 2008 11:28 pm PT
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• 16Oct 08

  Feeling Insignificant Without Leaving Your Front Door.

  It used to be that you had to go outside and look at the stars to feel small and insignificant. Now, all you need is to look at Google Maps at a route that is under a mile, and then just keep zooming out.
  
  The world never felt that big with a globe, that's for sure.

  • Posted Oct 16, 2008 11:25 pm PT
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• 7Oct 08

  Moving out on Thursday.

  The timing may seem a little odd for moving into residency at my college, but I didn't receive my funding until after the school year had begun. The bus rides, and the sheer amount of time they took up (one hour there, one hour back) was really starting to grind.
  
  There will be some adjustments... but for the most part, it'll be doing things with some regularity that I shirk when possible (laundry, cleaning, etc.). I'm looking forward to having access to a decent piano, as opposed to my serviceable, but not overly beautifully sounding keyboard. A few of them, in fact.

  I'm hoping this will allow me to get more done. I'd like to spend more time on my studies, on my understanding of game development, and specific skills pertaining to both. I suppose I might have to be social, too. But I think I'd rather hide in my room and study.

  Oh, and I'm taking most of my stuff in the Rock Band box. Not Rock Band itself... although since I'm not too far from my house, I will be trading systems from the ones I have at the house periodically.
  
  Should be interesting.

  • Posted Oct 7, 2008 2:38 pm PT
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• 20Aug 08

  I just have one question...

  Why do people who can barely put together a complete sentence always calling others dumb?

  The internet is a strange, sad place, my friends.

  • Posted Aug 20, 2008 3:38 pm PT
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• 31Jul 08

  Out of the Void, Into the Deep.

  It isn't time for me to leave the forums altogether, but I am going to stop attending these forums for a while except under specific circumstances.

  Originally I started writing what was turning out to be an unique piece about genius, and how it's not about intelligence but creation, and how I needed to pursue. But of course, it would be perceived as pretentious (not many people seem to realize some stuff is legitimately heady), and that I was just another kid on the internet who thought too highly of himself, one in a long line of kids with some intelligence, but not nearly as much as perceived. I know, I've met a few.

  I'd rather just start showing what I think I've got going. If I can present something that surprises people in its quality, then maybe I can say something on the nature of genius and be heard. But to do that, I've got to focus more exclusively at the task at hand. Thus, I have to reduce the amount of time that is not dedicated to my projects. I am going to be off these forums, off all internet sites, save for those directly pertaining to my work. You will still be able to reach me at my e-mail address DavidSupina (at) gmail (dot) com, and over my AIM screen name (if you want my AIM SN, e-mail me for it, although you'll have to introduce yourself if I don't know you). And I update you guys when I am ready to announce something related to my videogame project. But for now, I need to swear off GameSpot, IGN, HockeysFuture (stupid Oilers forum...) and all the other sites I currently waste time visiting. I'll remain on GameRevolution.com, because I write for them, so at least I'll know if Kojima suddenly unveils and releases Metal Gear Solid 5 on my birthday.

  I don't want to reveal too much this early, but if you picked three genres I would be most likely to design for, this game would definitely fall into one of those three. I'll be talking more about it soon. And although it's probably not going to bear fruit as soon, I'm excited about having more time to start toying with the piano and guitar more. Music is a highly enthralling field for me to learn, and I find that when my skills with an instrument grow, using them to improvise is blissful.

  Until there is more time. See you then.

  • Posted Jul 31, 2008 10:01 pm PT
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