Well that's it, Microsoft has won.
Honestly, it was never a race but now Sony is so busy falling over themselves that it's laughable. There was a time you could just not see eye to eye with someone who took Sony up on their promises, now you just feel bad.

Sony wants you to wait and one day you'll have the best console. They love talking about their ten year plan, what they forget to tell everyone is that in the beginning of that cycle they'd be offering nothing but crap. It's one of the most sophisticated pieces of hardware you can buy yet it fails to beat the 360 at anything.

This is what Sony is saying....

USER : "I wonder what console I want?"
SONY : "Please buy the most sophisticated console ever"

USER : "Oh great, so it'll do everything the best right? I love the best!"
SONY : "Well no, new technology takes time, research and development, you know"

USER : "Oh, well that's ok, so it'll do most things best?"
SONY : "As we said before, it takes time. Did we mention the ten year plan?"

USER : "Oh, well I guess that's ok then. I have my last gen library to hold me over"
SONY : "And you'll love playing them on your PS2!"

USER : "Don't you mean my PS3?"
SONY : "We don't support that anymore"

USER : "Why did you do that?"
SONY : "You said you didn't want it anymore"

USER : "I did? I could have sworn......Well anyhow as long as I'm able to play the exclusive Final Fantasy I'm in!"
SONY : "Yeah, about that.........."

Sony doesn't want to offer you the best games, the best media experience, the best online service, the best content.......
The list can go on and on, everything they want to offer users now is SECOND RATE.
With the hope that someday you MAY have the best, maybe.

Microsoft on the other hand wants to offer you the best.
If you want the best games you play them on the 360
If you want the best online service you pick the 360
If you want the best media content you pick the 360

How did Grand Theft Auto feel on the PS3? Lacking? Oh that's right because the full version isn't on the PS3, it's on the 360. Want the incomplete version of Fallout? Well the PS3 version is right there waiting for you. Do you want the FULL Version? Well then you'll want to get the 360 version.
I could make the joke that in Madden the 360 version has all the teams while the PS3 version never heard of a team called "The Packers" but something tells me it's too close to the truth.

As I mentioned before, Final Fantasy is now on the 360. That sound you heard when Final Fantasy was announced was every Sony exec wailing in a panic.

Netflix is another 7 million plus waiting to join the 360's ranks. With a larger userbase installed Netflix will be able to offer more movies online PLUS entertainment you can't get anywhere else on your TV.

Sony's last arguing point is that the PS3 is outselling the 360 right now. Well that's very true, it is. Although when we take a closer look we see that at the margin it's selling the PS3 will beat the 360 in sales in 200 months, to put it another way that's.....

16 YEARS!

At the current rate the PS3 will outsell the 360 in 16 years. Now I wasn't a math major in school but I'm almost positive that's over a half decade more then Sony's 10 year plan.

Microsoft has won.

Time for a game everybody!

We're going to play "Do I have healthy self esteem for gaming?"

It's really easy to play, all you need to do is see if some of the following comments describe how you feel.

• 1. There are certain games that I feel funny about buying, maybe even some I wouldn't buy at all because I'm afraid how I might look doing it.
• 2. I care what systems I buy. I limit myself to choices that don't allow others to question who I am.
• 3. I care about what else is on my system of choice. I'm afraid that others people's choices will reflect on me and I'm afraid to be judged that way.
• 4. I care who is playing the system of my choice. I don't want to play a system that my Mom or grandmother can play. That would make people think less of me as a gamer and that threatens me.

If you answered yes to any of those statements then I'd like you to sell off your systems and pick another hobby. You're lacking self esteem needed for gaming.

All gaming comes down to one thing.

Pretending to be an imaginary character in a world of make believe.

Let me say that again. You're playing MAKE BELIEVE!

What's sad is that there's such a large chunk of people that are scared, afraid, even petrified to make a misstep when it comes to gaming.

I also love how many people think that people care.

Some people actually use this logic.......

"Buying Super Princess Peach is bad, buying Super Mario Bros is ok, buying Grand Theft Auto is best!"

Yes that's right, that hottt girl you see really thinks you're a cool customer because you're buying a certain game. She is no way unimpressed that you're afraid to buy certain games. You know what they say? The best way to show a woman you're a stud is to be afraid of things.

Who cares what games are on a system?

Are you buying them?

No?

Ok then what is it? And don't give me this "I'm worried about how the company looks" because that's a lie and we both know it. You're worried that people are going to see through your shell and once that happens it's all over.

It's the same for who plays what system and who you play with. Heck, I play Pokemon with my Mom and I don't feel "ashamed", I'm not scared that someone might see me a certain way. I don't care because here's another thing in life, the people who worry about these things don't matter in real life. They're too busy hiding away trying to look cool instead of being cool.

That's the nice thing about self esteem. When you have it you don't care about who plays what or who does what. You don't worry about yourself and you do what you want, if you want a certain game you go to the store and buy it. You want a system go buy it. You want to play with someone you go do it. Makes life a lot easier.

Just remember, it's all make believe!

Enjoy yourself

Own a baby? Great, I want to explain something to you.

Your baby is not special, stop bothering people with it.

Your baby falls into two categories....

1. It's normal looking which means it looks like EVERY OTHER BABY IN THE WORLD

2. Your baby is ugly.

Both cases mean that you should not show that baby to people thinking it's special. It's not special, it's boring. Especially the normal looking ones.

Normal looking babies are boring, they all look exactly the same except they come in different shades. Black, white, various shades of tan, they all look the same. Even boys and girls, there's no difference. Want to know why parents dress them in blue and pink? Because they look the same!

Ugly babies are interesting but the parents of ugly babies never understand that their child is ugly. If a parent walked up to me and said "Hey wait till you check this one out" and showed me a baby that could be mistaken for a shaved monkey foot then yeah I'd probably be impressed. Instead they come up to you and say it's a beautiful baby. It's not a beautiful baby. Someone took a well oiled catchers mitt and left it in your stroller.

And what's with people showing you their kids? Everywhere you look people want to show you their kids with a sense of entitlement/pride because they reproduced. It's no big deal, people have been making babies for years. Sometimes two and three at a time. These things aren't rare because.....you know......we're here. If we're here right now it means that humanity mastered that whole "baby" part of life a while ago. You're just getting on the bus so go far to the back and shut your mouth until spoken to.

They even make books of babies, just pictures and pictures of these freaky little creatures dressed up in costumes. Anne Geddes has made millions taking these things and making whole books out of them. She takes a baby unlike any other and then dresses it like a flower and charges 20 bucks.

Now in the digital age it's worse. People have these things on their cell phones, and it's not just one picture either. Oh it would be great if I had to see one baby picture but now it's an album, an album of it in different positions all looking the same. Emails too. Forget Spam in your inbox, now you have pics of babies in there. It's not even like a birthday party (which I don't even understand why you have birthdays for babies it's just a way for pompous parents not to get over themselves) it's something like "Thursday spaghetti"

While I'm glad your offspring has all the balance of a three legged table in an earthquake just tell me it fell down, it'll be faster so I can go on with my life and you can bother someone else with that nonsense.

Something has to be done and once again I nominate myself for the job.

Here's my idea. I propose we set up a web site that has one dozen pictures of a baby on it. Users would select what skin tone their baby is and then get 12 pics to show to everyone. Every parent would have the same pics and only be able to distribute those dozen pics. In a matter of hours everyone on the planet would see those 12 pics and we'd be done. Parents could go onto other things like raising these things instead of telling you about them and the rest of us wouldn't have to waste time looking at them.

Heck, a guy can dream can't he?

I'm not going to bite you.

See my teeth are only like 4 or 5 inches away from my eyes no matter how I position my mouth. That means that if I was going to bite you all you have to do is poke me in the eye with your finger and it's all over, you win.

The eyelid isn't going to protect anything either, how thick is an eyelid? Like a 100th of a millimeter? I'm pretty sure if I were to take a cotton ball and throw it with some muscle behind it it would hurt my eyeball through the lid. To be honest I'm not exactly sure how strong my eyelids are and it's something I don't plan on testing. I know they keep light out unless it's really bright and stops water when I shampoo, case closed.

So if I was going to bite you I put my most vulnerable part of my body right there along with the teeth. How is that to my advantage?

You see dogs and they always bite and I wish I could get the point across that when they bite their eyes are right there too. Then again a lot of animals bite for the wrong reasons so I'm not sure I really want to share the teeth/eyeball connection with the animal kingdom. If the word got out wolves would stop biting altogether and take up some karate at the local rec center and there's no way you can stop a wolf that knows karate. Though they would need to wait weeks while their karate uniforms were being tailored to fit their bodies so we would have one last chance to strike.

On a completely unrelated note I'd like to move to the Italian part of New York and then have a child named "Gurt". That way he can be around the neighborhood and when people need him they can call out... "YO!......GURT!"

Oh, know what else? Any song that includes the word "booty" can't be classified a love song. There has to be a line drawn and I've got the Sharpie in my hand. From this point on a song that contains the term "booty" must be reclassified, I don't care if it goes in an existing category or they make a completely new category. Perhaps the "I was raised in an environment completely devoid of class" category.

Let's see the Grammys award that one!

I don't want to say I was right about Smash Bros but I was right about Smash Bros.

"Oh I can't wait for Smash can't wait for Smash can't wait for Smash"

Now it's broken, poor little Smash Bros is brokenZ.

As the immortal Nelson Muntz would say...

"HA HA"

For all the people saying what a great game Smash Bros would be? It's broken

For the months I've had to see Smash Bros topics? The game is broken

Oh yeah, can't see why Nintendo shelved Smash Bros and made sure Mario Galaxy made it to retail at Christmas.

Smash Bros is broken.

Now yes, there are a few who people who I'm honestly upset that their game is broken. I'm sorry your game is broken. I'm sorry online is horrible and that dropping connections and slide shows caused from slowdown plague your game.

On the other hand I just can't get over that dropped connections and slowdown plague Smash Bros online. I didn't know that when people said 3 weeks until Smash Bros they meant three weeks to connect lol

Knock knock.

Who's there?

Smash Bros.

Smash Bros who?

Smash Bros is broken.

For people who believe in Karma THIS is Karma. People went overboard on this title and in return they get a broken game. People couldn't say enough how this game would be perfect in every single way and it's not, it's IMperfect. A lot. Because broken can't be perfect!

And that is Smash Bros. Just another broken game that has things that need to be overlooked if you want to enjoy the rest of it. It's not perfect. Heck, it's not even solid in all areas.

It's a game that people pushed up on a pedestal and it stayed there for all of three seconds.

Until the lag kicked in.

Smash Bros on the Wii is going to fail.

There's no way it lives up to the hype. I mean you have people saying it'll be one of the greatest games of all time. No, not even close.

Then you have people clogging up the forums because if you're a fan of Smash Bros then you're also unable to read instructions on how the forums work. I've come to call it "Smash Blindness" where people are oblivious to any sort of directions and just post....

"WHAT CHARAKTR DO U WANT TOO BE IN SMASH?"

This much hype shouldn't be put towards a button masher. Oh excuse me, I mean a button masher with some quicktime mashes mixed in for good measure. What? Thought I was going to call it a fighter? No, it's not a fighter. Put Smash Bros against the likes of Virtua Fighter or Dead or Alive and it pales in comparison. To call Smash Bros a fighter is like calling Mario Galaxy a FPS because of the star bits.

What gets me is that so many people put this title on a pedestal where it does not belong. It's the gaming equivalent of junk food. It's a bag of potato chips and people are trying to say it's a 4 course steak dinner. Smash Bros is closer to dog food then it is to steak.

It's a cutsey kids game that's fun to play and bop people on the heads with famous Nintendo characters. I'll be getting the game myself so I can do the exact same thing, bop people on the head. But at the end of the day I wont say what a masterpiece the game is.

People complain about Nintendo being kiddy then they can't wait for the most kiddy game to be released. I don't mind the image that Nintendo has, E for everyone is great because everyone can play. Other people on the other hand want Nintendo to be gritty and more mature themed then in the next breath they're talking about this preschool mashfest....

"We need more blood, who are you gonna be in Smash Bros?"

It also doesn't help Nintendo that much because this solidifies their image that you can give it's fans a shallow, weak, childish, button masher and they're content. Heck they're not only content they're excited! Why bother with other consoles and their games when you can play great Wii games like Smash Bros which is bop people on the head, rinse, and repeat.

Oh but wait there's a level editor, oh I'm sorry. So people have to use at least a bit of their synapses to build some levels before they zone out kindergarten playground style.

Not that kindergarten style is bad, I don't want to see blood and gore in a Nintendo game featuring the characters. I mean a REAL fighting system would be nice with actual moves but that's too deep for the audience so that's toned down to simply a rock, paper, scissors style and it's a nice shallow aside.

People are saying this is all they're going to play on the Wii? What? I can't even comprehend this.

Do these people also wash their hair and when they rinse cry out and say "ALRIGHT! I get to do it again!"

That's what this game is, rinse and repeat. Fight characters using shallow sets of moves until you beat the other guy and work your way up the ladder.

Maybe it's because there's not many fighting games for Nintendo owners that this is so popular. Maybe it's a case where pillow fighting is better then no fighting at all?

It's working for them though and they'll sell a lot of copies and I'm sure that review sites are going to grade it highly as well. That still doesn't make it rise above junk food. American Idol gets great numbers and anyone who calls that even passable has issues.

Smash Bros is a good game for what it is, sadly too many try to make it more.

That's where it fails.