$60.00 is a lot of money, and we're in a time of economic crisis. Here's some ways you can make your money stretch:
•1) Withdraw your money from the bank:
The money in your bank is currently being eaten by the Monster of Corporate Greed.
Not pictured: your money.
Liberate it! With the way things are going, you have a greater chance of a Game Over flashing across the screen of your favorite MMO than you do of having a bank tomorrow. Are you happy about your bleeding rectum? The economy is.
Tip: Keep the remainder of your cash inside your old N-Gage container, and flush the actual insides down the pooper. If you don't own an N-Gage, DO NOT buy one to accommodate this guide.
•2) Withdraw your kids from school, auction them off at a silent auction... for the "needy"
Some people would consider this unethical, or even "illegal," but let's not split heads here. They're "your" kids (this requirement is even optional, you could use anyone's kids, honestly), what right do people have to judge, when worse things are happening to children all around us?
Tip: Call your auction an "open adoption," and dress "your" kids in Cosplay outfits.
•3) Invest your money against the US Dollar:
This one is self-explanatory. Pesos > Dollars in the near future. This strategy is practically bottling the worlds hurts and drinking from it every time you check your account information, and it's delicious.
•4) Bring your virtual empire to real life:
This can apply to oh so many games, here is a small list (with applications):
Ravaging your enemies can be quite lucrative, this includes brute force and arson.
We're gamers, but we have muscles now, get them back at your next reunion, turn the tables.
-Hitman: Blood Money
Self-explanatory. Piano strings are my favorite.
Come on now, I don't have to spell it out (lucky me: m-e-t-h-a-m-f-e-t-a-m-e-e-n-s)
Tip: I recommend against Zoo Tycoon.
•5) Always, always be inventive:
Through this tip, you could turn poverty into riches with the most random occurence.
Don't forget to always think: "what in this world is causing me pain, and who is to blame?" If the entity to blame has not clams, find someone with clams, and blame them.
Remember: Keep your eye on the prize.