There's impressions, reviews, previews, games to be blended and a whole tonne of lists!

---
Friend Codes (12 digits! Woo!):

Advance Wars: Dark Conflict - 0946-6380-7363
Super Smash Bros. Brawl - 1161-1616-2929
GTA Chinatown Wars - 2622-3149-5635
Mario Kart DS - 3737-2965-7653
The Legend of Zelda: Phantom Hourglass - 2921-7846-5401
Clubhouse Games - 0602-2666-1904
---

• 30Dec 09

  Sort of Game of the Year 2009 Special Awards

  Well, the year is almost over which means it's time for the second annual "Sort of Game of the Year Awards!" These awards highlight not necessarily games that came out this year, just any game that I got and played to some stage of completion in 2009. I was going to do a blog about the games I got for Christmas, but I still have to do the second part of these awards and a retrospective of the last decade so all you really need to know about my presents is Scribblenauts and Punch-Out!! So without further ado - the winners of the 2009 Sort of Game of the Year "Special" Achivement awards are:

  Prettiest Game - Okami (PS2)

  

  Without a doubt, Okami was the most beautiful looking game I played this year. You can say what you like about your next-gen consoles, but Okami on the PS2 has the best looking inklike, cel shaded graphics I've seen. I'd go as far as to call it one of the best looking games of all time. OF ALL TIME!

  Runner up - Okami (Wii) Same thing, only I played it on a slightly smaller TV.

  Biggest Timesink - Final Fantasy Tactics A2: Grimoire of the Rift (DS)

  

  And by that I don't mean the game with the longest title. FFTA2 managed to hold my attention for a massive 80 hours and counting - and I still haven't finished its main storyline! Its addictive combination of job mastery, skill learning and loot stealing makes it a DS game which is more than worthy of all your free time.

  Runner up - Plants vs. Zombies (PC) - Instead of posting blogs, I was playing this.

  Best Character(s) - The Entire Cast of Persona 4 (PS2)

  

  Persona 4 manages to subvert every single character cliche that's plagued JRPGs since Dragon Quest. Sure, there's the voiceless protagonist, but his constant nodding and mumbling in every cutscene seems to be played for laughs. As a game based around forming relationships with people should be, Persona 4 has an incredibly interesting supporting cast. The traditional JRPG sex symbol and general fanboy object of lust? Here she's sick of being ogled by males and just wants to work in a Tofu shop. The stereotypical "bad boy?" He likes to sew and is has a confused sexual orientation. From the cute Nanako to the overprotective Dojima, every character in Persona 4 has a lot of backstory and a lot of personality. Oh, and there's Teddie, who is unique enough to warrant this game's award alone.

  Runner up - Doc Louis (Punch-Out!! - Wii) Easily the most quotable character of the year.

  Worst Character - Jake (Advance Wars Dual Strike - DS)

  

  "Grab the plates, cause you just got served!" That's what I'd be saying to Jake right now if I wasn't willing to sink to the same level of inane stereotypical teenage dialogue as he was (and, you know, if he wasn't a fictional character). Despite the fact that he is actually a pretty decent CO to use, his atrocious dialogue and overuse of the word "Owned" means I never, ever use him. But his theme is good!

  Runner up - Yuzu (Shin Megami Tensei: Devil Survivor - DS) She spends the whole game doing nothing but moping about being stuck in the lockdown. Also her ending is the worst.

  Best Level - Space Paranoids (Kingdom Hearts II - PS2)

  

  Kingdom Hearts II sure takes its time getting to the interesting levels. Beast's Castle and The Land of Dragons are boring, Timeless River was too short and we've already been to Halloween Town twice before. That's why Space Paranoids, based on the movie TRON, shows that Square-Enix saved the best till near the end of the game. The world of TRON is a great fit for the world of Kingdom Hearts (certainly better than Winnie the Pooh was), and the light cycle section is arguably the most enjoyable part of the whole game.

  Runner up - Void Quest (Persona 4 - PS2) Further proof that putting a video game themed level inside a video game works brilliantly. Also further proof that Persona 4 can be eligible for just about any award.

  The Screaming Neku Memorial Prize for Best Game That Unfortunately Died - The World Ends With You (DS)

  

  What a surprise. My time with The World Ends With You was short lived, but I enjoyed every second of it. Well, except for every time Shiki opened her mouth and Neku mumbled something about his fragile emotional state (which was most of the time) but you hopefully get my drift.

  Runner up - My Corrupted Sonic 2 Save File (PS2) - Because getting past Hill Top Zone is a big deal for me.

  Best Soundtrack - Phantasy Star II (PS2 - but ultimately Mega Drive, I guess)

  

  While Phantasy Star II has aged about as well as, well, most Mega Drive games, it has a really good soundtrack. In terms of sound quality, it can't hold a candle to more recent games, but I feel it deserves this award simply because the music is so catchy, charming and probably the only thing that makes this ancient RPG worth playing now. My personal favourite track is the main overworld music which sounds fantastic in its original form, but when someone arranges it, it becomes evident just how enduring the game's basic compositions are.

  Runner up - Okami (PS2) - Ryoshima Coast. There.

  Best Boss Fight - Any Fight in Punch-Out!! (Wii)

  

  Except maybe Bald Bull because he's a pain. It seems unfair to give Punch-Out this award because, like Shadow of the Colossus, the whole game is nothing but bosses. But that's why every boxer you face is so interesting. Each one has their own set of weaknesses, unique fighting techniques and set of achievements that need to be unlocked to gain access to their great music. And in the end, doesn't it all come down to that - great music?

  Runner up - The final, final boss of Persona 4 (PS2) - No spoilers here.

  Most Addictive Part of Any Game - Drug Dealing in Grand Theft Auto: Chinatown Wars (DS)

  

  Fittingly, buying and selling drugs in GTA Chinatown Wars is one of the most addictive parts of any game ever. While little more than a diversion between missions, the drug trade is the best, quickest way to earn money and surprisingly deep. Rockstar added about 50 dealers and even a mini stock market to make what was essentially just a DS version of the old game Drug Lord to be the most addictive (yet morally ambigious part) of an already addictive game.

  Runner up - The War Room (Advance Wars Dual Strike - DS) Though present in every other game in the series (except Dark Conflict!), Dual Strike's War Room offers more maps, more COs and more free time lost.

  The Virtua Tennis Prize for Sports Game I Actually Like - Mario Golf: Advance Tour (GBA)

  

  I've always stayed true to the belief that the only sports games I enjoy are ones based around tennis (hence the name of the prize). Mario Golf on the GBA managed to prove me wrong. It's one of the best looking games on the system with tonnes of personality. And the golf side of things is really deep too, featuring RPG-like stat growth. Easily the best golf sim on the GBA. Though it's probably the only one.

  Runner up - Punch-Out!! (Wii) It's debatable whether or not Punch-Out is an accurate representation of actual boxing.

  Most Vomit Inducing Moment - The Fight with Belzaboul (Shin Megami Tensei: Devil Survivor - DS)

  

  Devil Survivor has a few possible candidates for this award (every time I look at Legion), but none are quite as repulsive as the giant demonic fly, Belzaboul. It's not his appearance that grosses me out though, it's more what happens in the battle. Belzaboul has an attack called "Spawn" that causes him to lay eggs in whatever character or demon they hit. After a few turns these eggs then hatch (presumably still inside your characters) causing massive damage and bringing a set of Maggots into a battle. So yeah, a boss that lays maggots inside your body. Ew.

  Runner up - Zhou ripping out a man's heart (GTA Chinatown Wars - DS) - What. A. Psycho.

  Most Disappointing Game - Scribblenauts (DS)

  

  Following a wave of average scores and underwhelming feedback, I was pretty well prepared for Scribblenauts being a bit worse than I had initially expected. Nothing, however, could prepare me for the disappointment I was to experience once I realised that it was in fact impossible to equip a duck with a bazooka. My dreams of conquering all of the game's stages with a militia of waterfowl were shattered. "Write anything, solve everything" couldn't have been a bigger lie - I couldn't even give a flamethrower to a swan. Ah well, I'll just have to resort to solving all my problems with nothing but wings, rope and pterodactyls.

  Runner up - 2012 - It's not even a game but still. I can only hope that the actual year won't be as disappointing as this film. On second thought, maybe not.

  Best Game I Completely Forgot About - Ninja Gaiden: Dragon Sword (DS)

  

  I played that game this year? Yes, Ninja Gaiden DS was a good game when I played it back in January, but after beating it I ditched it for more interesting, not impossible on higher difficulty levels games. Still, it was a fun game. At least I think it was.

  Runner up - Sam and Max Episode 4: Abe Lincoln Must Die! (PC) - They made four of these!?

  That's it for the "special" awards. Next time I'll wrap this up with my top 5 games of the year.

  • Posted Dec 30, 2009 8:27 pm PT
  • Category: Editorial
  • 15 Comments
  • Tag
  • Print
  • Email
  • Facebook
  • Digg
• 22Dec 09

  Lies, Damn Lies, But Mainly Statistics

  Ugh, it looks like I've been tagged so here's my obligatory blog with 10 relatively obscure and little known (at least on the Internet) facts about myself. Thanks for ruining Christmas, stupid tagging rule!

  1. This is actually my first time being tagged. So yeah, I just lost my tagging virginity.

  2. The last game I bought was Wii Fit Plus (not for myself), though I guess it isn't really a "game." In that case, the last game I bought was Mario Golf: Advance Tour. Toyworld were trying to clear out all their Game Boy Advance games (an effort that's been going on for at least a few years) by selling them for $10 each, so I figured I may as well help get rid of them. I'm not buying their e-reader cards though - they should have thrown those out years ago.

  3. The last movie I saw at the cinema was 2012. It was bad, but it was the kind of movie that was entertaining purely to see what stupid thing would happen next.

  4. I've already picked my game of the year winner. It should come as no surprise to anyone who's been reading this blog for long enough.

  5. This may come as a surprise to no-one but my real name is neither Game nor Blender.

  6. I'm probably going to be studing Law next year. At least that's what I hope.

  7. The worst game I've ever bought was Shrek: Fairytale Freakdown on the Game Boy Color. I was young, in need of a game to take overseas with me and I didn't know better. I really should've gone with Zelda: Oracle of Ages.

  8. If my early raids of the Christmas presents are any indication, I'll probably be playing a fair amount of involuntary Band Hero on Christmas day.

  9. I can shoot laser beams out of my eyes. FACT.

  10. Merry Christmas! That's not a fact but who cares!

  • Posted Dec 22, 2009 2:57 am PT
  • Category: General
  • 14 Comments
  • Tag
  • Print
  • Email
  • Facebook
  • Digg
• 17Dec 09

  Demo Man

  First of all, I'd like to thank everyone who didn't buy Grand Theft Auto: Chinatown Wars. Thanks to your collective lack of effort I was able to pick up a copy of the DS version for a mere $20! As someone who has barely interest in or experience playing the GTA series, I can safely say that Chinatown Wars completely exceeds my expectations. The graphics are some of the best I've seen on the DS, the writing is sharp and genuinely funny and the radio music is all well done. Some might find the touch screen minigames that intercut the gameplay to be a bit obnoxious, but I don't mind them as they make the game a bit more varied than simply "go to point A, kill this person, go to point B." The only really annoying thing about them is having to constantly switch between using the face buttons on the DS to stylus control, which takes a bit of getting used to. Aiming your weapon is also a bit of a pain, as the lock-on feature tends to select a random civilian in the distance, rather than the person directly behind you trying to bludgeon you to death. Regardless, it's one of the most enjoyable DS games I've played, and has been in my DS whenever Devil Survivor starts to annoy me. Which is most of the time.

  

  I hate you.

  I've been spending a bit of time on the Wii lately as well. As well as finishing Spyro 2 (by the way, I finished Spyro 2), I beat Metroid Prime 3, so I can now trade it in to get Trilogy. I like the fact that I can actually download Wiiware demos now, even if they take up way too much space in the Wii's tiny memory. Of the three games I managed to fit on there, Bit Trip Beat was the standout. Turning Pong into a rhythm game is more enjoyable than it should be, and at only 600 points I might have to download the full version when I actually get another Wii points card (wait, are they still called that?). Final Fantasy Crystal Chronicles: My Life as a Darklord wasn't quite as enjoyable, but I'll put that down to the fact that I was already playing a different, superior tower defence game at the time - one which will be reviewed shortly. My Life as a Darklord seemed to get a bit repetitive and, even though I love tonberries, the characters annoyed me. Lastly, Pokemon Rumble was OK. Not good, not bad, just there. I wouldn't pay 1500 points for it, but it wasn't terrible. There are plenty of Pokemon to collect and it puts nice, albeit simplistic spin on the usual Pokemon battle system. Overall it's far from the worst Pokemon spin off. That would be this game:

  

  I hate you.

  Pokemon Mystery Dungeon is a series that just doesn't seem to evolve at all. And it really needs to, because the first game (which I have completely played) was complete and utter rubbish. I just played a demo of Explorers of Sky (not Explorers of the Sky because that would make sense) and it was just more of the same. Ugly GBA quality sprites, a clunky, difficult to navigate menu system and a difficulty level that would make that Charizard up there cry tears of lava. I should never die in a demo version of a game. But I just did - because AI controlled Pokemon are stupid. Thankyou Propaganda/Nintendo Channel for wasting my time!

  But it's not all bad - I also downloaded the demo of Rhythm Heaven, which just makes me want to go out and buy the game even more. I almost did the other day, but for whatever reason it was marked as $50 everywhere. Anyway, the only problem with the demo was that no matter how good I did in the one level available, it would always fail me, just to keep doing the same exercise.

  I also tried out Fossil Fighters, a game which I assume is a shameless Pokemon rip-off. I say assume because the demo ended before I could actually use my recently revived Triceratops to fight anything. All I got to do was polish a fossil and then see a few screens of what the actual gameplay may or may not look like. Seemed enjoyable enough, but that damn professor just ruined all my fun.

  

  I hate you

  There was also a demo of James Cameron's Avatar: The Game (that's seriously the title), which, as is to be expected from a movie tie-in game, was kind of terrible. It plays a lot like the Zelda games on the DS. And I mean a lot. It's exactly like Phantom Hourglass if Phantom Hourglass had ugly graphics, repetitive music, lacked of any charm whatsoever and had gameplay that consisted largely of pushing around large blocks. No Temple of the Ocean King though. And it's still better than Pokemon Mystery Dungeon. Just makes me wish Nintendo had've made a Spirit Tracks demo available.

  Lastly I played/read the demo of 100 Censored-by-Gamespot-but-synonym-for-well-loved-and-highly-valued Book Collection. While the graphics didn't amaze me (sort of looks like Paper Mario without all the Mario), the demo was very lengthy. Even though it was only one level, the Romeo and Juliet stage was about 500 pages long. And the storyline was amazing! I've never played a game with such an intricate story and believable characters! It's like they hired real authors! In all seriousness, the Collection seems to be good if you like that kind of thing. Personally, I read a lot - I just don't read 100 books at the same time. I think I can cope with just carrying around one at a time. The only thing that could sell this game to me is if it let you put your DS in sleep mode and have Charles Martinet read to you, making different characters speak like various characters from the Mario universe. So, in conclusion - on the topic of the Collection:

  

  You're not bad.

  On an unrelated note, I'm in the running for Gamespotter of the Year! I'm not begging you to vote for me but...actually...that's exactly what I'm doing. Vote 1 GameBlender! And thanks to everyone who liked my last blog enough to get it featured. I definitely don't hate you.

  • Posted Dec 17, 2009 2:36 am PT
  • Category: General
  • 12 Comments
  • Tag
  • Print
  • Email
  • Facebook
  • Digg

See Previous Blog Posts »