• 4Jan 07

  Long time no...What!?!

  Ok, so I have been gone an awfully long time.  I will be the first to admit that.  And while I have tried to get my but back here to the forums, I have to admit that it was not very hard.  Mostly it was a case of "I will think about thinking about going back"
  
  Yes, I am a procrastinator.
  
  But then something happens that shakes your view of the order of the universe.  You realize there is important, and then there is Important.  Family and friends fall into that second category.
  
  I am a man of many words.  It is not so much that I enjoy hearing myself speak (I know written word and all) it is just that I enjoy the power that these words give.  They have the ability to express our innermost thoughts and convey new ideas.  They have a marked inability to accurately convey emotion.
  
  A poet attempts to wrestle words into emotive phrases.  He takes our collective understanding of the feel of a word, and uses that word to make us feel something.
  
  Take for example the words Bright and Garish.  Both have similar meanings, but completely different feels.
  
  But I digress.  I digress because I am faced with a situation that I am truly incapable of dealing with.
  
  It is not the possiblility of death that I can not handle.  Death has been a constant companion, shall we say.  As someone who has been cursed, at times like these, with a too perfect memory, I remember the loss of many relatives.  That is something I can handle.  Possibly due to my belief that this world is not the end, possibly due to something else.  I don't really know myself.  It is just that death, even sudden death, has never bothered me.
  
  What bothers me is the inbetween.  That state that exists that is not living, except in the clinical sense, and is not death either.  Life exists to be taken advantage of.  We go out and, to greater or lesser degree, experience what life has to throw at us.
  
  But there are things that laught in the face of life.  Disease, severe injury.  These things I hate.
  
  I guess it is that simple.  I hate the things that cause pain.  I hate pain.
  
  I don't know that I have a point.
  
  I have rambled enough.
  
  Don't know what else to say.
  
  I just hope that sometime soon, BB can yell at me for my stupidity.
  
  Get well,  BB.
  
  You are missed.
  
  • Posted Jan 4, 2007 11:55 am PT
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• 6Apr 06

  Yay

  Ok, so I have now finished my first two days of 12 hour shifts. Just two more and I get a weekend. I have to say that it is not as bad as I thought it was going to be.
  
  I was given some fairly big leeway for what I do after 5pm, so it is actually a lot like being at home. Get to watch my shows (on the computer of course). Get to spend time with my Wife (she comes in, we moved her computer here for the week)
  
  We will see how things shape up for the future, but for now, at least I will be able to see the shows that I come here for
  • Posted Apr 6, 2006 10:57 am PT
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• 4Apr 06

  Ok, maybe this is a little much

  Ok, so, because I am currently the only one answering the phones at my place of business (receptionist/tech geek/sales guy/billing person all in one) and we have decided to open them up 12 hours a day on weekdays (luckily I still have my weekends). This means that over the comming week, I am going to be actually working from 9am to 9pm. Now, since this is something I basically volunteered for, I have only myself to blame.
  
  But it does make me wonder: When is enough REALLY enough? I mean, I have a really sweet gig here. I am actually typing this blog while here at work. Another 4 hours a day (was already working 8 hours straight) is not much, but that puts me here at work (while not nescesarily working) from 7am to 9pm or 14 hours. So, 2 hours doing whatever, and then 12 hours tied to the phone. 40 minutes a day in travel time. 8 hours a night of sleep (I hope, insomniac remeber ) and that brings the total time of my life that is used up to 23 hours. That means I get 1 hour a day that is not used up completely.
  
  So have I gone just too far? I don't THINK so, but of course, I am on the inside looking out. Well, whatever the case is, here is to the first in a series of very long days.
  
  At least I still get paid overtime
  • Posted Apr 4, 2006 9:41 am PT
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