Some days it just feels like I'm living in some kind of weird parallel universe, and real life will resume soon. The last week or so has kind of been like that. To say I was a bit surprised to be told I was being made redundant is something of an understatment. There's probably not much point in my going into the ins and outs of it here, as it'll just get taken down, so I won't.

In celebration of my newly unemployed status, I am going to buy a dog on a piece of string and hang around on park benches drinking special brew. I've also decided I should have a mid-life crisis. True, I may be a bit young, but then if I get run over by a bus tomorrow, I've missed the opportunity somewhere in my early teens.

The trouble is, I'm not really sure what the deal is for women. I mean, we all know men start dating teenagers, buy a motorbike, and send off for miracle hair regrowth creams, but what do women do? Any suggestions welcome.

I'll only be updating this blog with a URL of my new one, and details of where I'm off to next, whenever I know. Thanks to all the readers I've corresponded with over the last couple of years, and all those who've emailed me and commented on my blog and stories. Take care

I'm not sure that Kevin can beat this....

**************************************

From: xxx
To: xxx
Subject: Understanding Vagina Dentata - A Website that's full of bite!
Date: 17th June 2008

An underground online marketing campaign created for new movie TEETH has sparked frantic discussion amongst bloggers asking the question - could this happen to me? TEETH, which is released in cinemas this Friday by Momentum Pictures, is an ultra dark coming-of-age comedy with a particularly shocking premise based on the myth of vagina dentata (Latin for 'toothed vagina').

The main focus of the campaign is a spoof healthcare site http://www.vagident.co.uk/ which includes a video testimonial from a woman purporting to suffer from the affliction who explains in detail how her life has been affected. The site has enjoyed great success, so far receiving over 60,000 unique users. The primary feature of the site is to house the video Understanding Vagina Dentata, which plays as a straight documentary. Support material on the site, including a look at the myths and facts of Vagina Dentata, and frequently asked questions, helped to create a believable healthcare concern.

The Understanding Vagina Dentata video has received over 130,000 views online so far, with fantastic user responses debating whether Vagina Dentata is a real medical issue, and whether the interviewees in the video are genuine. The campaign has grown via viral portals, networks, blogs, with additional reach through the distributor's student and washroom activity.

I love Bank Holiday weekends. In my local area they have fun fairs, car boot sales, and antique book fairs. Unfortunately, this weekend the weather was "a little inclement" so most were cancelled. I managed to get some cool pictures of the fun fair before it opened in the evening...

Kevin VanOrd over in the US recently started a series of blog posts called 'Fun With Kevin's Inbox.' Just to show him that people in the UK are just as strange as those in the US, I'm going to be bringing you the best of all the oddness that we receive this side of the Pond.

We're off to a flying start today with this news. Guy said he was so excited he was thinking of live blogging it.

YOU ARE INVITED TO A WORLD RECORD ATTEMPT! (This is flashing in different colours).

World's Fastest Laminator

When: Monday, June 2nd, 11:00-12:00 hrs

On behalf of GBC, Duomedia has the pleasure to invite you to join in the thrilling countdown as GBC makes an unprecedented Guiness World Record Attempt at officially establishing the WORLD's FASTEST LAMINATOR! At this unique event GBC will unveil the 8500HS Cyclone, a single-sided commercial laminator designed for ultra high-speed professional finishing of book covers, dust jackets, packaging and more. An official representative of the Guiness Book of World Records will be present on the stand to establish the time it takes the GBC 8500HS Cyclone to laminate 100 square meters. A champagne reception will follow the record breaking activity.

Come and join us in the thrilling countdown as GBC unveils their 8500HS Cyclone to make an unprecedent attempt at establishing it officially as the WORLD'S FASTEST LAMINATOR! Register now!

Locally to me, apparently.

Random signs from around the world that have made me laugh.

I wouldn't eat there...

I'm not about to argue...

Truer words have never been spoken...

North Americans likely won't understand why I find the next two hilarious...