Usually people describe thier blogs as something important, something meaningful that may possibly change the world... Mine isn't

• 15Oct 07

  The Hardcore Paradox

  I'm going to be honest with you people whom claim to be hardcore gamers... about 95% of you are total frauds.

  I am aware that the above statement will probably get me a lot of flak (most of it consisting of certain four-letter words and pointless assaults towards my sexuality), but it's something that has to be said. According to what I've seen and read on this and other websites, if we are to believe that playing games like Halo and Gears of War constantly makes you a hardcore gamer, then about 30 million people (In the USA alone) are hardcore gamers. Now, I'm not a fancy big city lawyer, but it seems to me that being hardcore implies a minority rather than a majority (hence why the title exists in the first place) and that the hardcore crowd would be completely untouchable in terms of skill.

  It seems to me that the exact opposite is true, that people who claim to be hardcore gamers are actually just a large poser group living in the delusion that as long as their favorite games are filled with swearing and diarrhea-like blood spurts, they must be hardcore. Now, if this were the film world, that might be true (I've yet to meet a person whom can watch Ichi the Killer without wincing) but alas, these are video games and you must have the skills to pay the bills.
  

  There was a Gears of War tournament at my local university recently, out of some 48 contestants, the only people who didn't scream out with glee as someone was being chainsawed to death were myself and a girl whom most had mistakenly assumed was just with her boyfriend. Personally, at that point I had played Gears for about 5 hours (about as long as the campaign was on Hardcore difficulty) and not really wishing to converse with the rest of the contestants, I chose to talk with said girl. Interestingly enough, we both shared several things in common, we both wanted the prize money, we both were mortified with the competetion and we had both logged over 200 hours playing Disgaea 2. As most of you assumed, the two of us performed admirably against our so-called hardcore opponents and walked away at the finals, choosing to split the prize money rather than spend any extra time in that den of sweat and all night curbstomping.

  So what lesson are we to pull out of this?

  Don't go to places that reek of beer and pretzeled bread? No! Those places are usually fun and exciting!
  

  Am I saying that you can't enjoy Gears of War or Halo 3? Of course not. It may not be my cup of tea, but then again, I am an active member of No Mutants Allowed.

  Being called hardcore is a privilege, not a right? DING! DING! We have a winner!

  Yes! Being a hardcore gamer doesn't mean that you only play a certain kind of game or place #1 in the world rankings. Being a hardcore gamer means that your main hobby is videogaming, that you've played every game you could get your grubby little mitts on, that you've gotten the same enjoyment out of beating Fallout as a child-killing genocider as you did collecting fossils in Animal Crossing! It means that you know the Konami code better than you know the Pythagorean theorum! Being hardcore means that you play games, regardless of genre, system or personal bias and juice every single last drop of enjoyment our of them until your fingers are blistered stumps that ooze pus! But most importantly, being a hardcore gamer means that you can do all of this and still make the time to have a spirited argument with people over the merits of having Sonic the Hedgehog in Super Smash Bros. Brawl! (Which probably means that I'll have to make another editorial later).

  So to all of those feaux-hipster wannabes out there, I scoff at you! Because not only did I beat Halo 3 on Legendary the first time through, but I also managed to beat God Hand on the hardest difficulty with the kick-me sign on my back, and there's no better feeling in the world for me!
  

  • Posted Oct 15, 2007 11:49 am PT
  • Category: Editorial
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• 2Apr 07

  Innovation V. Fun, The Eternal Struggle

  As most of you have probably read , Rod Fergusson of Epic Games has come to Gears of War's defense from the critics (such as myself) whom have derided the game for being less-than-innovative (more like beating a rock with another rock and making a smaller rock, but I'm going to hold myself back on this, I'm serious). His response is to basically say, A game should be fun before it's innovative. Now, a lot of people are agreeing with him and that angers me (lots of things do, but this makes me my-face-is-burning angry). For some reason, this is going beyond the aspect of games for me, because if you think about it, it is more than just a simple matter.

  This argument is basically the same thing as Progressive Vs. Conservative, Fun is something we know already, we all have things that we classify as "Fun" and odds are, they're all things we've done multiple times. Innovation is the cornerstone of entertainment, if it weren't for Film we'd all still be going to Operas (Satan knows we wouldn't like that) and if it weren't for TV we'd all still be sitting in front of the Radio (A day which will forever live in infamy!). The point is, innovation is good and people just aren't seeing the point.

  They assume Innovation entails new genres and new styles of play, when in reality it merely means making something new and interesting. For all of it's shiny bells and whistles, Gears of War was simply a refined version of Kill.Switch which was simply a refined version of WinBack, my point being that it wasn't innovative in terms of gameplay. Beyond that, it the game was also the same old Grizzled Military Squad fights off Alien Threat that isn't quite so Alien, all the while cussing up a storm and shooting things that aren't from here. Don't get me wrong, there are plenty of games I like that have bad stories (Urban Chaos: Riot Response, Worse story I think I've ever seen, but for some reason I really liked the game's violence and almost self-parodical nature) but this goes beyond a bad story, it's detracting from the game and ruins what little atmosphere there is (Black Man Named Coal Trane, Someone remind Cliffy B. to name his next Black Character Superfly Brown).

  Now some people tried to tell me that Innovation is no good without sales figures, well guess what? I don't care! It's the old-school case of everyone jumping off the bridge, this time being fueled by a mixture of a massive marketing plan and desperation (Show off all your shiny awards 360 owners, There just aren't that many fun games on your system and you know it).Well, all I can say is that I'm not going to argue with you guys anymore... No, I've instead chosen to actually participate in the game development industry!

  If there are any takers out there, I'm willing to share my services for no cost and I promise to make a game that will sell millions upon millions of copies, want to know how? You'll see...

  Peace Out People of this Ignorant World

  • Posted Apr 2, 2007 7:08 pm PT
  • Category: Rant
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• 1Oct 06

  The Death of Science Fiction

  I used to think that I would never reach a point where I would say, I hate science fiction... But unfortunately, It has come to that and for reasons I myself don't thoroughly understand. Ever since the release of a FPS named Halo, it seems that every science fiction IP that has followed it does just that, follow it. Aliens invade Earth and attempt to destroy the planet, it's a story that has been around since the 50's and I for one didn't think it could ever stop being fun, but it has. Gears of War, Resistance: Fall of Man, the list goes on, all of these games (once you get down to it) have identical plots, US VS. THEM!, FIGHT FOR HUMANITY'S SURVIVAL!... I'm sick of it.
  
      Now, I know some people are going to call me a hater or insane or something, but I can honestly make a better Sci-Fi story even if I drank myself stupid on hard liquor. Look at Dune and Star Wars, they are considered some of the masterpieces of Sci-Fi, and where are the invading aliens trying to destroy humanity? Nowhere! I'm not saying that we need the next Star Wars to revitalize the Sci-Fi genre, but there are several steps people can take to help do so.
  
  1. Just because a game has lasers and chainsaws bayonets, that does not make it a good Sci-Fi game
  2. Sci-Fi does not mean Humans versus Aliens, for a good example look at BioShock (exploring the remnants of man's failed attempt at Paradise)
  3. Sci-Fi doesn't have to be a trip into the psyche of our generation nor anything else other than Fiction based on Science
  4. Finally, If you ever see anything being called the next Halo, AVOID IT LIKE THE PLAGUE
  
  So in conclusion, If I angered or offended you, good, use that anger and try to prove me wrong, but if all you're going to do is insult me or my beliefs, just go and do whatever EXTREME or REALISTIC things you want.
  
  • Posted Oct 1, 2006 5:55 pm PT
  • Category: Editorial
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