Poor combat, bad pacing, uninteresting characters, and limited RPG elements. What more could you ask for?

User Rating: 3.5 | The Witcher: Enhanced Edition PC
Like many other highly recommended games, I gave this one a try. I really wanted to like it. Unlike the other games, this game has nothing to even grasp your attention long enough to even try to beat it, at least for me.

So what we got is a generic swordsman with superhuman capabilities and hunts monsters to pay for his rent and utilities. He, like almost every character ever, suffers from amnesia. He also is covered in scars and has an unnatural hair/eye color. Wow, that is a lot of cliches wrapped up in one uncharismatic character, one you can't sympathize with at all. Great... you can't even play as your own created character. Yeah it'd defeat a lot of the story, but the story already in the game is far from compelling anyway.

But I guess one of the selling points of this character is his ability to woo many females into having "relations" with him. Maybe for the undersexed of the gaming industry this is an awesome feature, but it's stupid and feels tacked on, and the only reason I see it being in the game is to keep people (losers) playing and encourages clicking on every npc, many of whom look just like everyone else. Sure, some npcs have interesting things to say, "your mother sucks dwarf... (you get the idea)" but it feels like the developers where just using a stupid-ham-fisted attempt to make the game more "mature." It isn't, it's just stupid and it is excessive. Yet somehow this factor didn't effect any reviews like the dialogue of Kane and Lynch...

Another abomination is the combat system: it's unique, I'll give it that, but that doesn't make it plain-awful to use. All it is, click once, wait for an indication to click again, and again, and the opponent dies. Click too fast, the game shouts "TOO FAST" at you. You can change sword stances, uninteresting weapons, use boring spells, blah blah. Unless you're a masochist, combat will get boring extremely fast as it's nothing more than a slowed down Diablo-Clickfest.

Also, as asked earlier, where do the RPG elements come in? There is some character modification with skills, but it feels highly limited. Can you travel anywhere? Naw, the game is on rails for the most part, and there is no incentive to talk to random npcs (unless you want to have sex with them) because none of them have anything interesting to say, and if they give you a mission, it is the standard (boring) "fetch-me-that." Speech options? As shallow as Oblivion or Fallout 3 (i.e. ankle deep). Also, why do you need to return to the beginning of the dialogue tree after a question you ask a NPC? If this was present in the original release, you'd think they'd fix it in the "enhanced" edition (read as: huh, we mad a bad game the first time, lets try to salvage it somehow).

Over all, this game was an utter waste of money and time, and you couldn't pay me to play it (speaking of which, I want my money back).