What hath God wrought? People of all nations, God hath wrought this: Lawnmower Man.
All the earth was without form, and void; and darkness was upon the face of the deep. And the spirit of God moved upon the face of the waters.
And God said, Let there be Lawnmower Man: and there was Lawnmower Man.
And God saw the first edition of Lawnmower Man, that is was good: and god divided this Lawnmower Man from the darkness.
And God Called the Lawnmower Man Light, and all other games he called garbage.
"And there was Lawnmower Man." How sweet such words are to the spirit. We must all not forget the beginnings of all of man anc civilization with this Godsend known only to us unworthy and inferior humans as "Lawnmower Man." Such joy it brings to all men of all nations. Now, even today, all violence, hatred, and poverty throughout the cataclysms of the infinite universe are all caused by unfaithfulness to this Lawnmower Man, and its paganistic underappreciatedness. When there was no sin, there was Man, Woman, and Lawnmower Man. No disturbances lie in the universe, and all of the constellations aligned in universal harmony. Now, chaos and confusion run rampant in everywhere. Only one conclusion can be drawn: without Lawnmower Man, there is Evil, and with Lawnmower Man, there is Good and Righteousness. Only the rise of Lawnmower man shall revive the poisoned galaxy back to it's eutopian state of being. However, children of Jobe, remember that such tanquility may only be attained through faithfulness in Lawnmower Man. Let us rejoice that it is here on this Earth, and just understand that salvation from evil comes only through Lawnmower Man.
Amen.