The Nintendo is dead. Get over it.
The artwork is uninspired; the characters are slightly less compelling than Mario Brothers (which already take a solid back seat to Sonic and Zool). The soundtrack is remarkably unsurprising. Virtually every aspect of the game aspires to--but fails to reach--the heyday of gaming on the Commodore 64.
If you love eight-bit gaming this much, save your $7.50 and buy a used Nintendo at a garage sale. If you're a masochist, buy the game and play it for the three-and-a-half minutes it takes you to comprehend why platform games deserved to die.