Let's all just pretend that this spin-off never came to be.

User Rating: 1.5 | SoulCalibur Legends WII
Where do I begin with my disappointment? The colorful box art paired with the notion of playing as the Soul Caliber characters in an action/adventure/ beat 'em up /whatever-you-want-to-call-it/RPG drew me in like a gullible moth to a flame. However, it became bluntly apparent to me with the opening sequence which appeared as if it had been compiled entirely in Adobe Photoshop and Aftereffects, that this is indeed a budget game riding on the notoriety of a big franchise's name and likeness.

Let's start with the graphics, shall we? To my understanding, while the Wii is not nearly the powerhouse that the PS3 or the 360 claim to be, I'm fairly positive that it's at least slightly more capable than the previous generation of which the Soul Caliber series most recently looked good on. And that being said, one would also think that Namco would be able to easily copy the game models over from the previous entry to the Soul Caliber name into this new title. My gripe that I am slowly trudging towards is that there is no reason why the game models in 'Legends' should look so flipping cheap and ugly. And it's not like the piss-poor backgrounds or enemy models are doing anything to steal the processor's attention by any stretch of the imagination. Speaking of enemies, I'd like to note that you'll be fighting the same hordes of uninspired and repetitive enemies from start to finish. It's like not a single ounce of effort went into designing the enemies. You fight a palette of skeletons, golems, mummies, lizard men, and so on and so forth.

The unappealing visuals do not end within the actual game play; the large majority of the hacked-together plot is unfolded with still frame portraits of the characters involved in the un-voiced dialogue displayed over the world map while occasionally cross-fading their expressing into something that may or may not match what they are possibly trying to convey. By the way, the dialogue shares the same standard of writing quality as some 14-year-old's Soul Caliber fan fiction. Seriously, there are parts where characters break into angst filled melodramatic speeches about their tragic childhood entirely unprovoked. I've actually wanted them to stop talking just so that I could get back into the horrible game play for the simple reason that it is the lesser of two evils.

Perhaps the one way that SC: Legends tries to stand out on its own is the idea of swinging your Wiimote to swing your sword (or other exotic weapon). Making it one of the few Wii games I've played where you actually have to mime out the actions like the system often boasts. But even that falls apart as its argumentative sensitivity means that it is next to impossible to execute your moves with any sort of intentional flare. Eventually you'll just boil it down to wagging your Wiimote frantically as your character strings out an attack sequence which comes out adequate for what you want it for. Except for when you have to specifically perform a clockwise or counter-clockwise horizontal slash to solve the occasional rotating statue puzzle. For some reason, the game constantly associates my counter-clockwise arm movement with either a vertical slash or a thrust.

To sum it all up, I'll just say that it would probably be better if we all just forgot that this installment to the series never existed and wait patiently for the next true sequel to grace our consoles…. Sort of like Devil May Cry 2.