Adam Sandler won't rest until his knucklehead comedic hijinks have graced every American sport. He also won't use a gym so as to make his roles believable, but that hardly matters. The Longest Yard (a remake of Burt Reynolds' 1974 flick) is the latest such romp, and it takes place behind the walls of a football-loving prison. Sandler's character, Paul "Wrecking" Crewe, is placed in charge of a band of misfit convicts, and he's instructed to turn it into a losing football team that will play against the prison guards. Basically, it's The Mighty Ducks, but with sociopaths in place of cute kids. This arcade-style football game plays just fine, and it includes several wacky ways to tip the odds in your favor.
Each of Paul's players is rated statistically, as well as by aggressiveness. While Paul is listed as "calm," some of his teammates are downright "dangerous." This feature doesn't seem to have much of an impact on gameplay; it's mostly there to represent the film characters' personalities. Further wackiness comes in the form of unlockable pranks, such as being able to slip a laxative into the prison guard team's food, incapacitating two players each time you do so. You can also equip your players with unorthodox gear, such as spiked helmets or metallic padding.
Like several mobile football games, The Longest Yard opts for seven-on-seven player action, as 22 sprites is a few too many to display on a diminutive mobile phone screen. Nonetheless, you've got a decent variety of passing plays, with three receivers in each. The running game is much weaker, and the enemy artificial intelligence will typically thwart your efforts. It's best to pass, pass, pass, and thank your lucky stars the AI isn't better.
The game controls simply, and defenders close to the ball are automatically selected and followed. While on defense, pressing the 5 key will initiate a tackle, as well as comic book-style lettering, announcing the result. It's too bad more over-the-top moves aren't possible.
The Longest Yard is presented quite well on the LG VX7000. The player sprites may not vary greatly, but they're detailed and have a distinct, cartoony style. The frame rate is consistently fast, a necessity in an arcade-style sports game. Meanwhile, the game's sound is pretty much restricted to the "thwap" sounds that are already textually represented. Some inspiring background music and movie voice clips would have been nice additions.
If you're a fan of the movie, this above-average football game may tickle your fancy. Besides, putting Adam Sandler in jail nicely prevents him from enjoying yet another saccharine love affair with Drew Barrymore.
