Over the next few weeks, in preparation for my first year of university, and, in turn, a higher standard of writing criteria used when judging essays, I shall undertake a rather arduous task.
I shall write reviews. Video game reviews. Yet they shall be flowing and beautiful, all but empty of the standard, miserable trappings of current video game 'criticism'.
I have already begun, with the classic Nintendo Entertainment System title Blades of Steel. Here is a preview:
It is warm out here, on the ice. My body quivers. My legs shake. My mind rattles.
It is warm out here, on the ice.
But ice, ice is cold.
The puck drops.
And so begins, with little fanfare, the new era of criticism. This is it, people. I hope you brought your Pampers.