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The Loser, the College, his Life and his Sweater

Your ol' Pal Loser is going to Sydney University soon. I am a bit scared and skeptical about how it will turn out.

Will I really have to invest in a College Sweater?

They say this University is in the top five throughout the whole galaxy.

I would like people to list for me (in a humourous fashion) the do's and don'ts of starting University.

Get creative!


Juno: The Game of the Movie - My Ideas. A Raise Your hand special...

Okay was anyone else a little confused by the announcement of this game based on the movie about the tennage girl getting pregnant? Raise your hand!

I have a lot of respect for the film but I just cannot in anyway see how this could be made into a game.

If I were to make a game of this here are a few simple ideas:

1. Stealth Play: Sneak into your parents house! Sneak into the convenience store and steal the keys to the bathroom!

2. Collect Stuff! Find the hamburger phone and the pregnancy test! Move the furniture! Get the tick tacks for Paulie!

3. Raise your health by drinking the blue slurpy drink!

4. Obligatory driving sequences! Just like NFS only with a pregnant girl behind the wheel! Drag Race to the Clinic! Talk to the gothic receptionist.

5. Fight the girl who gives you the "stinkeye" and the ultrasound technician!

6. Duel the bad husband guy in a jamming session!

7. It should be a FPS running on the source engine! :D So instead of a crowbar in your hand like that other game you have the pregnancy test or the slurpy drink! But if you look down you can see your heavily pregnant stomach! Immersion!

8. RPG elements! Increase your charisma to win Paulie's parents over! The maternity pants act like an RPG inventory where you can carry more goods!

9. Plasmids! Including a sensory ray that works like a telekenetic ability except that it only attracts food! You have the increased appetite so you better control it!

Soo who likes my ideas? Raise your hand..

EDIT & UPDATE: Box Art just released!

There Will Be Blood - Film Review

Directed by: Paul Thomas Anderson.

Beginning in 1898, There will be Blood centers around Daniel Plainview (Daniel Day-Lewis). The ultra arrogant and competitive oil tycoon travels the outback of America with his young son, propositioning small communities with wealth if they allow his business to drill for oil. Plainview provokes the image of a family man onto his business and employees but it becomes apparent that wealth has it price.

Over two hours, this is a long but ultimately engrossing film, meticulously crafted by Anderson and acted purposefully by Day-Lewis, who is exceptional. His confident speech illuminates his arrogance, efficiency and hubris. Comparisons to Citizen Kane have been made, but the novel Oil which the film is based on, was written well before that picture in 1927. The film therefore stands on its own merits, remaining rich in its theme of capitalism against religion, the value of family and the lust for power.

Film Review: Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street

Directed by: Tim Burton.

A barber, who once called himself Benjamin Barker (Johnny Depp), returns to Victorian London to seek revenge on the judge who was responsible for the death of his wife and for imprisoning his child. Renaming himself Sweeney Todd, he enlists the help of a baker (Helena Bonham Carter), who runs a pie shop below his business.

While the lavish and beautiful gothic artistry may be familiar, this is quite unlike anything Burton has ever done before. He has adapted the famous broadway musical to deliver a violent and compelling thriller of great threatrics. "At last - my arm is complete again!" Sweeney proclaims, holding up his barber's razor. Depp is the center of the film, in a challenging role, one where he shows an internal sense of brooding fury, along with outburts of sporadic violence. Although the gore is difficult to watch, the story, visuals and performances remain intensive throughout.

Juno - Film Review!


Directed By: Jason Reitman

A sixteen-year-old girl named Juno (Ellen Page) has made an important discovery: she's pregnant. The father is her one time love interest Paulie Bleeker (Michael Cera). Juno chooses not to abort the pregnancy, but to give the child to a needing couple, Vanessa and Mark Loring (Jennifer Garner and Jason Bateman).

Juno, directed by Jason Reitman, is a small but satisfying film about love, birth and relationships. Despite its moderate running time it remains wholly satisfying as a comedy. It remains familiar territory for Reitman who's previous film Thank You For Smoking was also about children and parentage.

Surprisingly, the film does take its time to hit its strides. The start of the film feels slightly forced and smug in its humour, with its oddball characters, including a weird convenience store clerk and a gothic receptionist handing out flavoured condoms. It is as though Reitman is trying a bit too hard to be quirky.

But thankfully it settles and eventuates as a very sweet and funny film, mainly due to the very likeable performance of Ellen Page. Even at twenty she remains so believable as the teenager Juno. She looks physically younger and smaller and her delivery and timing of her lines, courtesy of a script by Diablo Cody, is spot on. The bulk of the film is dependent on Page but she carries it so well. She is in nearly every scene in the film and without her it would never have been the same. She's very deserving of that Oscar nomination. There is also strong support from Juno's father (J.K. Simmons) who adds some nice comedic touches and even Jennifer Garner surprises too with real sincerity.

There is a point in this film where the story could have entered darker territory. Juno makes frequent visits to the would-be father Mark, but their newly formed friendship remains harmless and innocent. Nothing terribly major occurs throughout the film and there are few surprises. Its about people and a small slice of life.

In lesser hands it could have been a mere coming of age story. Reitman however seems keen to stress the importance of parentage in the most humourous way. It is a timely topic too with celebrities adopting and having children like it is going out of fashion. Juno, amongst the gloom and gore of cinema today, is a movie that will leave you with a warm feeling. Its a really nice film.

My 18th Birthday!!

Ahem, 'evening all.

What a great day it is today! My Birthday! 18 years ago the world held its breath as a new Loser entered the world - a loser that would turn darkness into light, fear into hope and consoles into ash...

The Biggest Loser was born and in his honour a public holiday was created: NLD - National Loser Day! In a monumental event all losers across the world joined hands as one to celebrate their pity and lack of girlfriends!

Ahhhh...what a way to start the year! This years goals include:

1. Get a girlfriend (which you will all hear about in the unlikely possibility that it happens).

2. Go to University!!

And many others that shall remain secret....till my next blog outting!

Anywho, I look forward to hearing your well wishes! And congratulations to you all: you know how old your Uncle Loser is!! :D