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VaguelyTagged Blog

rain at times, visibility zero, calm.

so i'm crying like a bltch over a 2 months relaionship which came to an end today.i almost begged her not to leave me at this point. i asked whether there is anything i could do to fix it and she just kept repeating her "no"es. i knew she once cared about this relationship and i just don't understand why she stopped caring all of a sudden! that aside; i also have no idea what's happening to me, i used to believe that i was an apathetic **** and i was quite proud of it and look at me now!ol i've never felt this weak ever!

i can't think of anything else but her, i don't know where to go, nor do i have anyone to talk to, and i'm too embarrassed to tell my friends that i'm actually crying over such a short lived relaionship. guess she was more than just a girlfriend to me. she was my only getaway of this loneliness and boredom. she made me feel hope once again and i just can't get over all of these now. yeah! i'm such a loser. not sure why i'm posting this here,guess i just needed to save this moment right now for  i'm going to feel numb for months and i'm afraid i've got to get back on medication once again. i just wish i could get back in time and kiss her while i had the chance.

i'm a total wuss!

it's been a while since i've noticed that but now i'm blaming it for all the problems i'm dealing with atm;lack of motivation,depression,laziness,etc.
the thing is i think all of the problems i mentioned above are just my made up excuses to justify my incapability to act on my life goals.i've never shed any sweets for anything i have today and yet i see people going through sh!t to gain what they want and i need to relieve myself from the remorse i feel inside for being such a wuss.can't stop blaming myself for not having been through a harder life.i envy self-raised people i see around for they're cleary happier with themselves and also more humble than i am./emo/rage.

"you guys are all M16 agents."

so,a few days ago a member of iranian paraliment called a certain group of an opposite wing "m16 agents"./facepalm..m16? like srsly? see guys,that what we iranians are dealing with; ignorant,yet quite arrogant! honestly i don't know why i'm making this blog post,guess i'm so desperate atm i felt the urge to make this open letter just for the sake of expressing my bludgeoned rage towards this kind of stupidity.