Ok, time for a new blog I guess... and this time I'll tell you about my divorce. Don't worry I'll try not to whine as much.
It all began in the last quarter of '08. I had a surgery and I was unable to move freely, so I wasn't working and I wasn't helping at all at home. Due to this my marriage entered a rough patch as my (ex)wife literally had to do everything at home and she was getting sick of it... but most of all, because I wasn't paying too much attention to her. A MISTAKE :(
Anyway, the nagging got a bit worse but nothing worth a divorce IMO. So what was it then??? Well, I'll come out clean and say that about a year ago, I had the chance to score big time with some other girl at work (if you know what I mean)... but the problem here was that as I was still in a delicate state, my (ex)wife had the car, so she used to drive me to work and pick me up whne the work was over. So I didn't really had a chance to execute my magic on that other girl cuz I never left the house alone by that time.
(Un)lucky me, by that time, she started receiving txt messages from one of her friends from work.. clearly the guy had something in mind, but I don't think she ever did something wrong... she really loved me. So I took the chance and told her she was cheating on me and to g.t.f.o. of the house. She cried and swore she wasn't but I "refused" to believe her... all this to have some room to perform my evil schemes freely. BIG MISTAKE :x
After a couple of weeks, I told her to come home and she accepted... except that her parent were on a trip and she told me to wait for their old folks to return. I told her it was ok but one day (the day her parent returned actually), she told me she had to drive her boss to the airport and I totally blew it out of proportions (BIG ****ING MISTAKE :x)and she was so upset that she told me she wasn't coming back.
A couple more weeks passed and I almost convince her again to come back home, but my mates at work invited me to a strip club... on a day I was supposed to meet her to go out for a ride. Knowing I wouldn't be able to dump her and go to the strip club with my mates, I almost told them I wasn't going... but then again, fate intervened and she arrived 1 hour late and with allmy characteristic stupidity, I blew it out of proportions again (ANOTHER BIG ****ING MISTAKE :x) and she told me she wasn't coming back ever again because of my bad temper.
Time passed by and I wasn't able to convince her again, so I told her that if she wasn't truly coming back, we should divorce... and she accepted. And so my marriage went to the trashcan. Needless to say the whole time I've been really depressed. I started to slim down like crazy, and most people at work thought I was sick (they didn't know) and even thought it was aids or even cancer.
Now I feel this house is so ****ing big for me, all alone and stuff... all because of 4 stupid mistakes I could've easily avoided. But alas, what's done is done and even though my regrets still remain, I think I'm ready to get over those... still guilt is a terrible burden, my friends and a one saying goes: You don't know what you have 'til you know it's lost.
So here goes to my lost love... the love of my life. The woman I chose to be my life partner and I lost out of pure foolishness. There's a Hole in my Souland it'll be really hard to fill, baby :cry: