D_West / Member

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D_West Blog

Top games. No items. Final Destination. Fox Only.

1. Wind Waker

2. Half Life 2

3. Metroid: Zero Mission

4. Super Smash Bros. Melee

5. F-Zero GX

5. Fallout: New Vegas

6. Bastion

7. Rock Band 2

8. Batman: Arkham Asylum

9. Advance Wars: Dual Strike

10. Viewtiful Joe


There.  We good?  We good.

Street Cleaning Simulator Review

The year is 2X48, and the streets of the world are in disarray. You play as Jack Priest, a man who has seen his streets too dirty for too long. When his wife and young son are taken by the ooze on the streets known only as "the grime", Jack knows what he must do.

This game is an amazing mix of Second person shooters, RPGs, and space shooters. The first third of the game is spent cleaning up your city's streets (obviously modeled on Merced). The second act is spent assaulting the grime's lair, and the final act is spent attacking the grime's homeworld of Grimeoklua. The story flows seamlessly, and the character of Jack Priest(voiced by Nolan North) is truly a realistic and sympathetic character.

Dialogue sample:

Jack: You grimes killed my family! I will have my revenge!

Truly this writing is the work of pulitzer prize winning novelist Eudora Welty, a newcomer in the gaming scene. However, she really knocks this story out of the park.

If you buy one game in your life, buy this one.

SCORE: 9745/9747

D_West is a person

I grew up a poor youth in urban Pennsylvania.

Most days, I would spend time on the local playground, because it was the only place I could afford to go to.

I would spend most of time playing basketball by myself, becoming quite proficient over the years.

While I was happy, my poor socioeconomic condition kept me relatively friendless, but at least I was independent.

One day, a group of ruffians that were up to little good began to create some trouble in my usual basketball court.

Naturally, I thought this boorish behavior could not stand, and I unfortunately got invloved in the fisticuffs.

My mother, shocked at what happened to me, completely overreacted. She sent me to live with my aunt and uncle, so I would not end up a ruffian myself.

As I pulled up to my new abode in California, I yelled to the cab driver that I would smell him at another time.

I arrived to my new life. I arrived to my new quarters. Who knew what kind of life awaited me here?

And that, my friends, is how I became the Fresh Prince of Bel Air.

Metroid: Fusion vs. Metroid: Other M


You know what the best 2D game ever made is? Do you really know? Do you really know what game combined the aesthetics and atmosphere of a 3D game to the 2D space perfectly? Do you know what game I find to have the best and tightest controls ever in a videogame?
Metroid Fusion

YAAAY!  For real!
Metroid Zero Mission also qualifies, because it has the same mechanics as Fusion, and is a remake of the original Metroid game for the NES.
But let's stay on the subject of this blog: Metroid Fusion is the greatest 2D game of all time.
And I am angry.

I am angry at Metroid: Other M

This game already has hundreds…..HUNDREDS of problems I can whine and complain about, but the main one is this:

Samus Aran already had a definitive game, and its name was METROID FUSION.
Metroid Fusion does not have any BS storylines about Samus losing her powers to "Show her former commander that she doesn't need them."

aw man!

I sure wish I had my varia suit here! Too bad I need to prove myslef!

That, my friends, is crap. Samus is a smart and calculating bounty hunter that does not need to prove herself to anybody. She has defeated the space Pirates numerous times……..BY HERSELF. The very thought of Samus turning her own upgrades off while exploring through Other M disgusts me.

What was I talking about? Oh, yes. Metroid Fusion is the perfect Metroid game. It is the perfect 2D game. Yet, the more I type here about it, I keep contrasting it to the aspects of the Other M. So I'll make my points in a list form.

1) Metroid: Other M is an utterly stupid name for a game. What is this "Other M?" I can only assume its another Metroid. So yes, the name of the game is Metroid: Other Metroid. Say that to yourself for a minute. Metroid…….OTHER METROID! That's like calling the third Lord of the Rings book/movie -Lord of the Rings: The Lord of the Ring-. It just doesn't work.

the king

Spoiler alert: The king returns

Metroid Fusion COUNTER 1) Metroid: Fusion. Samus is fusing herself to an experimental suit after almost being killed. She must adapt with a new suit, different to the one she has had her whole life. She must work with the fusion suit made from the Metroid serum. It's short, it's catchy, its appropriate. Metroid: Fusion. And it's not stupid.

2) Let's add an involved story! How about you don't, instead, Team Ninja! How about the FACT that Metroid is all about exploration and loneliness? The whole point of the series is to provide a sense of loneliness and exploration, and to overcome obstacles using only your own wits. The story of the Metroid series is about a lone bounty hunter who lands in a large and fascinating world and only use her own experience and wits to overcome incredible odds. That's it. It works. Samus having a voice? Interacting with the Federation troopers? You just……Don't do that. You just cannot do that. The Zelda series has NPC's to provide dialogue and help you along. The Metroid series does…..should not. It's the story of Samus, and that's it. No one else.

Metroid Fusion COUNTER 2) Metroid Fusion provides you with Samus' inner monologue at certain parts in text. And man, does it do a whole world of good. Just a few snippets of story. Just tell me where to go. Give me a limited interaction to her ship. Let her be reminded of her past life for a brief 3 minutes, then let me enjoy the game some more. The text does a wonderful job of giving you Samus' thoughts without giving you a dumb voice to accompany it. If you are going to make Samus talk, you better get a really strong and intimidating female voice, not the whiny Samus we get in other M. Samus is the toughest and smartest bounty hunter in the galaxy, and we get that feeling from the Fusion game. A brief story to keep us going, maybe some brief interaction with a computer, but that's it. Please.

3) It's only controlled with the Wii remote! Isn't that fantastic???


Metroid Fusion COUNTER 3) Okay, the voice acting's bad, the story looks dumb, the title is terrible, but if the game is good, none of that matters. But guess what. They take the best part of Metroid games, the controls….And throw them in the trash. Yes, you heard me. The greatest part of the Metroid Series isn't the story, it isn't the music, it isn't the atmosphere (although those last two are excellent in the series), it is the controls. The controls are perfect in Metroid Fusion. Eight way shooting, easy access to missiles, running and shooting, running and shooting diagonally….Perfect side scroller controls. Perfect.
This new game is contolled only with the wii remote sideways.
WHY WHY WHY????????????????

The game has an interesting dynamic of pointing the remote to the screen and entering a 3D perspective, something that looked really cool. Unfortunately, you cannot move in this mode. You. Cannot. Move……..Because the game has no Nunchuck setting. No Nunchuck setting! Can you believe how amazing a Metroid game that allowed you to play in both 2D and 3D would be?
I'll tell you.

It would be life changing.

Instead this game gives you limited 3D control, no shoulder buttons for easy missile access or shooting diagonally, and no analogue stick to move in 3D! That is awful! The Nunchuck comes with the Wii system, the game is single player….Just use the darn Nunchuck! Every single Wii owner has one!
use it

You see this? Use it.

Conclusion: Metroid: Other M has not even come out yet, and already I am disappointed. The reviews are streaming in now, and the outlook is mixed. Some like it, some hate it. The fact that even one professional reviewer has given it a 6.5 out of 10 is a huge problem, even worse that another has given it a 2 / 5.

A Metroid game deserves better than this.

I have a confession to make. I do like Super Metroid.


Actually pretty bad.

I find it too frustrating, too labyrinthine, and too difficult. Metroid Prime 2: Echoes is also a misstep in the series do its limited and brutal gameplay. And when a Metroid game limits you in someway….Whether it is confining you to pylons in a "dark world" or confining you to be stationary in a "First Person Mode," limitation only makes the games frustrating.

Metroid is the best when you slowly but surely become unlimited in your ability to explore. Metroid: Zero Mission accomplishes this by taking away all your powersr near the end of the game, only to give you possibly Samus' greatest power ever with her gravity suit upgrade, which can kill every normal enemy in one hit! You feel true power in her unlimited screw attack ability, and her cannon that CAN SHOOT THROUGH WALLS. That is amazing! Shooting through walls! You receive a power so unbelievably crazy in a 2D game, its amazing.
Fusion also gave you a steady increase in power. You are hunted by the SA-X, an alien clone of Samus, during the game. The SA-X can annihilate you and forces you to hide. When you reach the end of the game, though, you have the power to fight back against it, against yourself! That's an awesome feeling as well.
Even the Prime series(1 and 3) does this really well.

What I am trying to say is this: Metroid is about being alone on a planet or space station, as the peerless bounty hunter Samus Aran. She steadily grows in power until she reaches the boss and has to escape. Along the way, she upgrades her weapons and has fluid control that makes you feel connected to her. THAT IS IT. Nothing more, nothing less.

Metroid: Fusion succeeds in this goal, and Metroid: Other M fails.


I feel.....Like I'm in a good game. I don't need to narrate my life story. Life is good. Life is really good.

Starcraft 2: Tales from a noob.

I have never played an RTS before.

Yeah, I call myself a mainly a PC gamer, but I have never actually gone out and bought an RTS title. I love turn based games, like final fantasy tactics and Advance wars.

But hold it, for a second, let's talk about about Advance Wars. You need to master how to control specialized infantry units, aerial untis, different commanders, naval units, CO powers, dual strikes, and long range artillery to ANY good at the game. Advance Wars: Dual Strike may just be the most complicated game I have ever played.

Until Now.

Starcraft 2 is like Advance Wars, but without the cushion of planning your turn carefully. It is possible to excell at Advance Wars by just going through an algorithm of every possible move the enmy could make, then adjusting your strategy accordingly. It is a lot like chess, where the advantage of time to plan occurs.

Not in Starcraft 2.

You must be constantly and fluidly thinking every move that you do. No longer is there time to strategize while your enemy doesn't move. Every moment you are planning, your enemy is doing the same. This is the brilliance of a balenced and challenging RTS.

There are a lot of things going on in starcraft 2

Starcraft 2 may just be the most balenced and challenging of them all, or so I have heard.

Look how much.....Stuff...Is happening in the following picture


If you haven't played an RTS like me, this image may be frightening. However, after going through the single player and tutorials of Starcraft 2, I can safely tell you that the game does a fantastic job of teaching you how to play. Yes, it is complicated. VERY complicated.

However, once you get a handle on the comlexities of the game, it feels incredibly rewarding to be commanding multiple millitary fronts that you yourself created.

Here are some important lessons I have learned from the game that will help out all my fellow RTS noobs.

1) Protect your base

I can't tell you how many times I went all "Leeeeroy Jeeeenkins" and sent a big army to my opponent, only to have my base be destroyed while all my units were away. START by creating a good defense.

2) Send scouts.

Scouting will give you helpful cues on your minimap if your enemy has mobilized

3) Don't block your base

I went a little crazy with setting up some helpful cannon untis for the protoss race. Unfortuanately, I also blocked me and my friend in our base, forcing us to build two new bases outside our defenses. Oops.

4) Build a wall

As a terran, always build a wall with some supply depots. Supply depots can be collapsed, allowing your tanks and thors to pass through, but can be raised up to block out enemy ghosts.

5) Build detectors ASAP

Nothing is worse than getting nuked. Make sure you can destroy any ghost before they can nuke you.

6) Keep on building

The most, and I mean most, important thing to do in starcraft 2 is to keep collecting gas and minerals and building units. Even if you think you are safe, you are not. Spend up ALL your resources building and upgrading your units. You should never have over 300 minerals.

7) Don't get discouraged.

You will lose most of your games. Its just a fact. Don't get angry. Watch the replay of your match, and see what tactics your opponent did to defeat you. Use this knowledge in future matches!

In conclusion, Starcraft 2 does a great job of teaching newbies how to play and master the game. The game takes a while to master, but once you do, the thrill of victory is worth it!

Lots of space marines around games these days...

Valve, the Best Video Game Company.

It finally happened.

I have now logged 100 hours of Team Fortress 2 on the PC.

When I first got the Orange Box for the PC back in November, I finally had it with nintendo not delivering the kind of gaming experimence I wanted.

So, I turned to Steam, Valve's own community program, and made a Profile


Let's check my orange box stats. Note that I had never played FPS's on the computer before the Orange box.

Half Life 2: 24 hours

Half Life 2: Episode 1: 5 Hours

Half Life 2: Episode 2: 6 Hours

Portal: 3 Hours

Team Fortress 2: 105 Hours

So lets recap, for a $30 game, I have logged 143 hours in total, bringing the grand total to 20 cents an hour of gameplay.

Here's what a smart person said what Modern Warfare 2 would look like if it were run by Valve(Right click it and press "view image" to see it all)

Wow! What a concept.

Team Fortress 2 has an insane number of downloadable maps, game modes, and a lighthearted tone that stand in stark contrast to what most millitary shooters.

Buying a new computer($200), upgrading my graphics card and Power Supply($70 total) basically gave me access to gaming's best value. Thanks, Valve.

Most of all, I want to thank Valve for their dedication to providing awesome games with a huge amount of free content, provided by themselves and the public. I love how valve encourages their communities by praising them in much updated blogs, showing that they really care.


Most of all, I love the steam platform. Steam allows me to make friends, see stats, earn achievements, and download games, just like xbox LIVE does for a fee. But...Steam is free too!

I know I'm ust blindly praising Valve at this point, but they just do so many things right that I can't help myself. The headlines just scream about Ubisoft, Activision and EA abusing gamers with some kind of DRM or unpopular firing. However, they do not address someone who is doing everything so correctly, so non-corporate like.

Three cheers for Valve, the best video game company in the world.


Who has the best exclusives?

To me, the answer to who has the best exclusive content is obvious to me, and it might surprise y'all.

No doubt about it, it's the PS3. If going by just individual scores, this becomes apparent. Off the top of my head I can think of Uncharted, Resistance, Ratchet and Clank, Little Big Planet, God of War, and Metal Gear Solid 4 as examples.

Nintendo also has a strong lineup of exclusives, but sometimes, they miss the mark or are too gimmicky (Mario and sonic.....At the Olympics??? You gotta be kidding me.)

When it comes to Microsoft, they do not have many exclusives, purely for the reason that their games can be ported to the PC so easily and cheaply. Heck, Microsoft even released Gears of War and Halo on PC's.

So, in this era of few exclusives and most games being developed for PS3/Xbox/ maybe PC, it's up to Nintendo to make their best games constantly to stay ahead.

...Except they haven't. AT ALL. Since 2008, Nintendo has only released 3 major-franchise-big-fat Wii exclusives that were NOT remakes or ports or recycles(Animal Crossing City Folk) : Super Smash Bros Brawl, Mario Kart Wii, and New Super Mario Bros. Wii

(On a related note, I am declaring New Super Mario Mario Bros. Wii as the most lazily titled game ever. "Hey Jeff, what should we call this new Mario game on the Wii? Duuuuuhhhhhhhhhhhhh......." Its like calling Super Mario Galaxy "Super Mario 64-on the Wii and IN SPAAAAACE!!!!)

So what does a Nintendo gamer like me do? Go to the PC of course. But that is beside the point. The point is that Nintendo really has to knock it outta the park with their big releases this year.

I am most excited for Metroid: Other M(Also a lame title, but oh well), and we'll see how SMG2 turns out. Call me crazy, but I didn't like Super Mario Galaxy that much. It was okay. Nothing mind blowing, but a solid game.

Metroid: Other M(groan) looks like a return to my favorite games in the series: Metroid Fusion and zero mission(Call me crazy again, fanboys, but I really don't like super Metroid for reasons I'll explain some other time). It combines the awesomeness of the 2-D Gameboy games with the visceral action of the 3-D games like Prime. I'm really looking forward for this game to stop the drought of new seclusive Wii games.

As for Zelda, I've learned the one thing to do is to never ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever ,ever expect it to be released on time. As a younger man, I waited so long for Twilight Princess that I almost held it as some kind of mystical creature that would solve my problems and give me free lollipops. When I actually bought it, I held it in my hands and almost couldn't believe that it existed. For the new release, I'm going to put my expectations lower so I can relive my experience of being surprised by Ocarina of Time.

I hope that with the release of these games, Nintendo can show that they haven't become lazy (too late). I hope that after this year, they enough enough releases for the next year as well. What good would it be to get so many exclusives this year and have to wait another 2 years for any of them? We would be right back in the same position.

NEXT TIME: Why I hate Super Metroid and why the GBA games were so much better.

Mario is grabbing his crotch on the Super Mario Galaxy 2 Box Art


Mario Grabbing His crotch

Not only that, but he is doing unspeakable things to Yoshi!


Why did you make your mascot do this? ON THE COVER OF THE GAME. Have they lost their minds?

Yes. Yes they have.



Let us anylize this image for a minute. You have your regular space theme, the lumas, blah, blah, blah.

But look at Mario. There is no harness on yoshi, not any kind of handle or saddle that he could concievably hold on to. He is just having the time of his life grabbin' where the sun don't shine. Yoshi is enjoying it too.

I mean, couldn't he have the other hand in the air, I don't know.

Beatles:rock band update

I'm now number 523 in the world!!!

I can consistently get an FC(Full Combo, no notes missed) on Paperback Writer, and I'm moving up in the ranks. If a friend with a camera comes over, I will definately try to post it by Sunday.

Keep on movin'

Number 1065 in the world!

I've been playing The Beatles: Rock Band lately. I'm number 1065 on the solo play Drum leaderboard. The only things stopping me from a higher score are the EXTREMLEY hard trio of songs on drums: I Feel Fine, I wanna be your man, and Get Back are are SUPER HARD. If I could just practice those, I could get 5 stars on every song. THEN---hopefully I'll get around number 500!

Finally, hours of wasting my life playing plastic drums will mean.....Ummm, something. If you want to see videos of me playing Rock band drum songs, just comment and say that you do. See ya.